Step Daughter comes in Dirty Panties

Yellow - posted on 06/12/2011 ( 7 moms have responded )

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My step-daughter is going to be 3, and she is pretty much all the way potty-trained. When I pick them up from their mother, the children are always in clothes that are dirty. So immediately when we get home I feed them dinner and put them in the bathtub. When I am helping my step-daughter undress, I notice a very nasty smell coming from her panties. When I look, she has residue from her BM on her underwear! I mean bad, so bad its smelling through her pants and I can smell it as she walks by. I am sorry but I could not allow my child to walk around without an un-wiped rear end... she should be teaching her how not just letting it go un-wiped. Ahh, what kind of mother does this? especially one that claims she is super mom!

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Mariah - posted on 12/11/2011

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We had to stop sending them to BM in "our" clothes because they would disappear never to be seen again. We were spending too much money replacing the clothes we sent that BM would keep so now we have to just wash the clothes they are sent in and send them back in those. I hate putting them back in clothes that don't fit right, but we just can't keep buying new wardrobes.

Mariah - posted on 12/10/2011

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I feel you, Kay! I haven't ever had the BM issue, but my step daughters come back dirty, with long dirt filled fingernails, and with rashes on their faces from food being left there and not washed. We have often had to do the right out of the car into the bath tub routine! We get them back in clothes that don't fit all the time. One is in 4T clothes but was sent in 24 month pants and a 2T shirt that was digging into her arms because BM is too lazy to wash clothes for weeks at a time. 3 year old hasn't wet the bed here for over 6 months but tells us BM still puts her in pullups at night which gives her red swollen marks on her hips. BM also claims to be super mom and goes on and on about how they are her world...but they are always sick, dirty, and overtired when returning. It's amazing how these women live with themselves and really seem to believe they are doing it all perfectly! Luckily our girls will have at least one good mother figure in their lives!

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Sharlene - posted on 03/03/2012

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Can you and your husband teach her while she's in your care .And mention to the Bi -mum in a calm and settle way the sitution and maybe all of both parties can teach your step daughter .best of luck

Amber - posted on 03/02/2012

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That's just horrible! We have the same problem with the bm sending daughter in clothes too small. Custody recently changed and she lives with us and visits mother every other wknd. It states in the court order that both parents are to keep a wardrobe that is of the appropriate size for the child and she still sends her home in clothes that aren't her size. She is a size 6 she sent her in panties size 7/8... We also cannot send her in 'our' clothes because we don't get them back. She goes back in mother's clothes. Daughter complains about her mother's clothes all the time. She put on her mother's clothes last wknd to go for the wknd. She said to me "how come it's too small in the back?" Well that was because the shirt was 4t and it JUST BARELY covered to tummy... Just now she said "these socks are too big..." They are ther ones her Mother sent. I don't know what to do except document EVERYTHING!! We have been documenting for months and it really helped the last time we went court and custody was actually changed... Good luck and DOCUMENT!!!!

Lindzie Beachy - posted on 01/18/2012

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You should take your SD and get this documented with a local hospital (they have social workers there all the time)

Lindzie Beachy - posted on 09/06/2011

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Sounds like there are a lot more issues, i assume you two dont get along am i right?

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