I need advise, son with ADHD is out of control.

Jessica - posted on 04/29/2009 ( 80 moms have responded )

1

8

0

My 11 yr old son has ADHD. He is on concerta for meds and I have lost all control with him. He is disruptive at school and at home. I have tried every form of punishment I can think of along with numerous reward incentive programs to try to get him to listen, help out, and just simply be respectful. I am at my wits end. Does anyone have some advise?

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Phyllis - posted on 05/12/2009

580

23

189

My son started Concerta at age 4 (he is now 5) his diagnosis is ADHD- mixed type, severe, and ODD as well. We have seen only one side effect to the concerta, which is anger, but only at the higher dose. Otherwise the results have been great. Unfortunately, to keep peace in the house, I had to promise my hubby that we would only give meds on school days which are every other weekday. This means that 4 or 5 days a week he is unmedicated and out of control at home. My husband doesn't seem to realize how hard it is on me and on our other son. I literally cannot let him out of sight or he will destroy things, hurt his brother, or worse. We have had to call an ambulance because I left him alone in his room (he's 5!!!) so I could start supper. What 5 yr old can't be left unattended in his room for 5 minutes!? He has nothing left in his room, because he used his toys to smash his windows! He made his Aunt cry last weekend! My husband has me feeling like an evil troll for wanting to have him on medication daily. The only upside to cutting back his meds is that he sleeps a little better. He constantly mouths off, tells us he hates us, screams and yells and gets absolutely manically hyper to the point that we have to physically restrain him against us until he calms down, which can take up to 45 minutes. On med days, he is calm and rational and polite. He uses his manners and doesnt break anything (on purpose at least) I'm seriously upset because I know if I try to tell my husband that I want to go back to daily meds, he is going to flip and we'll be back to fighting all the time.

Amber - posted on 12/14/2011

1

0

0

i have 4 boys they r goin on 15, and 13 in july and 10 in april and 9 in march.. my youngest 2 have ADHD,ADD and the youngest also has ODD.. They have never been on concerta but they do take a med called adderall in the mornings and i can tell you it really helps... My youngest Mark does really good in school and on the very rare days that i do forget 2 give the boys their meds Marks teacher can tell as soon as he gets to school because he cant focuse on anything and is very disruptive... i have 2 drive over 2 school asap so i can give it to him... i know it sounds bad but i'm starting 2 wonder if his meds do need 2 be uped because it seems 2 have wore off by he time he gets home and to be honest he drives me crazy and the 2 youngest seems 2 feed off each other and i sometimes end up sitting on my bed crying because i just dont know what 2 do anymore so honey beleave me your not alone... but i just wanted 2 let you know adderall helps the boys so much... hang in there... things will get better.. well thats what i tell myself... lol

Rachel - posted on 08/12/2009

7

1

1

I just read a reply that I cannot locate again but I really, really want to chime in. She is absolutely right, in my opinion. She stated that she is also a special education teacher to add to her creditability... DO NOT TELL YOUR CHILD THAT THEY HAVE A "PROBLEM", "SICKNESS", "ILLNESS" ETC. DO NOT TELL THEM THAT THEY ARE ON A MEDICATION!!! These are very smart kids and with that, tend to be very manipulative and cunning. They will use it as a crutch to explain why their behavior is not their fault. My daughter believes that she is taking a vitamin every morning to help her get brain get stronger! I can see where it would be more difficult to conceal it with older children but for now it works. Also, you have to know that kids NEVER want to think that they are different, because in their minds that means "weird" which is bad. They already have the feeling that they are different, we don't need to confirm it. Age appropriate explanations and nothing more.

Yda - posted on 06/18/2009

1

6

0

Hi there, my son is 7 and is currently on Concerta. From an early age he was so active and out of control, I kept on thinking he was just naughty and kept on trying to find ways to disipline him. Well, until I discovered combining exercising with the medication, works wonders. He does gymnastics now twice a week and place soccer also twice a week. I also changed my own mindset about his behavious. He can not control his own actions, so therefore I should try control mine. I adapted the attitude that my son is different ... so treating him or disiplining him the 'normal' way will not work. So for a reward, I would ask him to choose what he would like to do (not have). I made it an "active" reward. I don't know if this will help you ... but it has worked wonders for me and my son. Good luck!

DD - posted on 10/22/2012

13

4

0

My older son has taken concerta successfully for years -- my youngest started on Concerta, but it seemed to make him more hyper -- so the is on vyvenase and intunive --- the combination seems to be working wonders for him....my advice is the same as several others -- talk to your doctor ---- --- just because he's on medication for ADHD doesn't mean it will actually work FOR him!! --- be an advocate for your child and keep asking questions/changing doctors/whatever it takes to find something that works for him!! (Also you probably need to go to a psychiatrist (not a general practice physician or pediatrician) ---- they have much more options at their disposal and understand the illness much better.)

If you see this, leave this form field blank.
Powered by RESPECT not THUMPS

80 Comments

View replies by

Jemima - posted on 08/23/2013

3

0

1

I feel your pain! I have an 8 year old with ADHD.
Can I just say that ADHD is not a Disease or an Illness. Ive heard the terminology a lot in this discussion.
Its not a reasuring thing for a child to feel like he is diseased or ill. ADHD had no cure so a child does not have ADHD, They are ADHD.

The same old advice goes, You have to be consistent. Have a schedule on the wall so your child knows exactly whats happening, and when throughout the week ahead.
Keep a routine with meal times and bed times. Children like to have structure.
Let them have an hour a day to play on their games consoles but maybe let them earn more time for good behaviour.
Punishment can be very challenging if you have a child with ADHD. For example, Time out. I find it completely useless to use one minute for every year of their life. There is no way my son is able to sit still for 8 minutes. The first minute he is moaning about being there, the second he calms down, and the third he is sorry but after that he just gets angry and figgits and forgets why he is there in the first place.So 3 minutes is plenty.
When he has a tantrum about something find it best to try and ignore the situation as much as possible until he has calmed down, and then discuss his behaviour and give him a consequence that he will understand. sometimes giving them a choice of punishment helps them feel in control but still no that they have done something wrong. He can either do the washing up and put the washing in the machine or have no xbox for the day.

Amy - posted on 10/23/2012

140

0

12

Great advice, DD C -

My son's Pediatrician was prescribing his meds, but later after a few med changes said my son was too "complex" and referred him to a Pediatric Psychiatrist. Best thing we ever did was go to him. He was VERY knowledgeable about the disease and treatment options!



Amy

Elizabeth - posted on 10/16/2012

17

0

1

Have you and your son had any behavioral therapy?



My doctor suggested short term therapy for my son and it was a big help. I was skeptical at first and thought "what can a therapist tell me about my son that I don't already know?" I was right, she didn't tell me anything I didn't already know, she just talked to us and helped us figure out what would work best for us. It is still a challenge most days with my son and it is a lot of work for me. I have to keep him on a schedule and he has to have lists for chores and school work and I have to keep up with a reward system (even now at 11 years old).



He is on Concerta right now and we are pretty pleased with the results. He has changed medications several times since being diagnosed and none of them work as well as they do for my daughter. Once he tried Adderall and it actually made him worse. Maybe Concerta is just not the medicationfor him.



I think maturity has a lot to do with it too. Raising a child with ADHD can be challenging.

My son has never been violent or defiant. I have to ask him over and over to do things and eventually he does. It is frustrating. I have to tell him the rules over and over and he usually acts like he has never heard it before. He is always complaining that he didn't know or forgot when he gets in trouble for not doing something. He loves being silly and making us laugh so he tends to not take things seriously, even when I am angry. I am very thankful though that he is smart and kind and respectful.



Maybe a talk with a therapist would be helpful in helping you find out what could work for you and your son. Who handles his medication? We finally started seeing a psychiatrist to oversee my sons medicine after having to change so many times. Our pediatrician said a psychiatrist would be better. The psychiatrist suggested the therapy.

Tera - posted on 10/14/2012

1

0

0

I have an 11 year old with ADHD,possible ODD and tourettes. He was on Adderall, but now he is back on Concerta. I am going through the same thing so I feel your pain. He has been in two mental clinics during the summer and I lost my job because of the doctor's visits, hospitals etc. I do work with a mental health center through the county that I live in to get him additional help. They also have a 24 hour access hotline, where my son can talk to the people and offer help and solutions that he can take to not be so disruptive. He is also in the process of obtaining wrap around service. Reach out to your insurance company or your local county mental health services.

Amy - posted on 02/20/2012

140

0

12

OMG. I know exactly what you mean about the sitters. They usually only last one night for us! Then they are always "busy" when I call back to ask them to sit the next time.



My boys are out of control! My 7yr old is ADHD and my 5yr old is just plain wild! I started medication with my 7yr old last year in Kindergarten, but before I put my oldest on meds, he was uncontrollable. He still has his bad days, but at least he is better than he was!

Rachel - posted on 08/12/2009

7

1

1

Your frustration shows right through your typed words. My stomach is in my shoes just thinking about it. I remember it oh' so well...



If he is on Concerta, which I completely and whole-heartedly reccomend, it may just be time for another dosage increase. According to our doctor, that happens over time and is to be expected. Don't be afraid of the higher dosages... if that's what it takes to get it under control, go for it. You can always back off later if needed. I was very resistant to medication of any kind but the Concerta made me a believer. Our doctor won us over by telling us that this... is NOT a life sentence.



Because I tried everthing else first, I would highly reccomend Dr. James Lehmans' Total Transformation program and possibly, a second one by him called Consequences. They really open your eyes to what is behind the bad behavior and what you could unknowingly be doing to make it worse instead of better. Like everything else in life, once you understand the "why" you can see the "how" to fixing it. It was well worth the money. If you google "Total Transfomation" you'll get to his website. All the information was very enlightening. Good Luck! -

Kristi - posted on 08/05/2009

6

29

0

I would go back to the nerologist and change his meds sounds like they aren't working.

Pam - posted on 08/05/2009

1

4

0

My son is 3 and he will not stay in his car seat. He is very hyper and my daughter is on focalin 15 for ADHD Mood disorder and Anxiety disorder and i think he's taking her foot steps. Anyone have any advice for any kind of child harness for the van.

Karen - posted on 07/31/2009

2

0

0

Everyone is definately on the same page with their answers, you can tell it's from EXPERIENCE. My 8 yr old is still on adderall...since 2... he was the youngest that his pediatrician ever put on these meds... and believe me he needed them. He was destructive when he was 2 before the meds, bounced off the wall etc... but he never slept also.

He takes clonidine at night also since 2. The adderall does curb his appetite, but at least it works and he does so much better in school . We've increased the dosage twice. He's only on 15 mg twice a day... but he's only 52 pounds..lol... tiny thing . I am not experienced with dealing with an 11 yr old at home with adhd, but I do know that every child is different and it does sound like that either the doctor needs to change the dosage or try another medication. There are so many out there. They just have to find the right one for each child. As for his behavior at school, if his meds aren't working he can't control his behavior..... not sitting still, "bothering people" , not being able to concentrate or stay on task. I have to tell you that even though teachers are educated about add and adhd, not all of them will take into consideration his problems if it affects him in his class. I taught high school business and computers with lots of medically disadvantaged students, and some teachers just DON'T CARE why they are doing what they are doing and will treat him like that also in class which will make this situation so much worse. If your doctor doesnt' try something different or change the dosage I would definately find another doctor that will. If he's not sleeping enough as they other posters said, that definately will make a difference in how he acts during the day ... (i'm not adhd but you know if we don't get enough sleep we are cranky parents ) Keep your faith because you will be able to get this adjusted to where he won't have problems at home or school. I was never a mom that limited certain types of foods or after a certain time they couldn't have anything, but I have been trying stuff like that lately and it does make a difference. But I've found I can't have it at home and not expect the kids to whine and throw a fit or sneak it when i'm not in the room. JUST Don't buy it and buy other low or no sugar snack stuff. Stay strong and keep your faith, it will get better, you just have to stay on top of the doctor to let him know you need him to make changes since there are things that will work out there! Hugs.

Alexis - posted on 07/30/2009

4

31

0

My son was on concerta and I had to take him off of it because it made him more aggressive. He is now on Vyvanse.

Shawna - posted on 07/24/2009

3

11

1

is he sleeping 8 hours or at all?go back to the doc mybe the meds need to be adjusted or changed,my son tried three different ones before we found one that works,increase their omega3,make sure they get a good 8hour sleep could be a sideeffect from the meds.try something different (new roots herbal)quit child see how it works to help him relaxhe may need to have meds adjusted.put him in an activety like basketball,hockey active sports ,try changing his diet just for one week and see if that changes anything don't give him anything with red dye in it ketchup is really bad no juice with dye no coollaid.increase fish if you can.see what happens.some of these could be triggering his rage.good luck!!!

Janet - posted on 07/23/2009

2

18

0

I am a mother of a 12 year old son that is adhd. In kindergarden the teacher told me I needed to have him tested and I put it off until his second year in 4th grade. He failed the first time and it wasn't becasue he did not know how to do it. He could not focus on how to do it. He would just sit there do a couple of pages and that was it all day. He would do anything else. He would help someone that needed it or clean the classroom or take out the trash. He just could not sit still and do his work. And at home it was the worst. He would not ever do anything that u ask him to do. He would always do what he wanted to do. Well, anyway I carried that next school year before it started back and had him tested. They put him on Adderol. He has been on it 2 years and only had it up twice. He worked mircals for us. Now he is a AB student. And loves to do school work now. I also put him in sprots. That seem to help him the his aggration and it tired him out quicker. He is now going into the 6th grade and his doing great. Now we do have his moments and when we wake up and forget to take his medicane. For a couple days not taken it u can tell. He gets really emotional and wont do NOTHING. We are both adjusting. U have to be there for him no matter how upset u get. I remember I would go lock myself in my room and cry and pray to God for help. As long as u beleive in God and pray the answers will come. It is hard at times because I also have three more kids on top of him. One older and two younger. And alot of my time was focus on him. He is very attacted to me and I hardly ever get out of his sight. But we are getting better. And I will pray of all of u that u will get ur answer that u need. That is my life with a 12 year old ADHD. That is the only advise that I knew to give u. I hope it helped

Dee - posted on 07/20/2009

2

30

0

Hi, Jessica! I have LOTS of professional experience working with children who have ADHD as well as behavioral, mood, and psychological disorders. I would strongly suggest that you have him re evaluated...not only with your pediatrician (of that is who prescribes his meds), but a mental health professional as well. Different meds work for different children. I have found that (and this is just my opinion) Concerta works great for ADD, but doesnt seem to have the same effect for ADHD. He may need to try a different medication. Dont settle with one answer from one doctor. Keep searching until you find the right professional for your family. I have worked with so many children who are medicated and nobody ever knows they have the diagnosis until they are out of meds or accidentally miss a dose. There IS hope. Dont give up!

Nukesha - posted on 07/20/2009

3

6

0

My daugher is also on Concerta. She is 9 and I am a special education teacher who deals with children all the time. This may sound a little crazy but how aware is your child of thier condition? What I have found is that children who know they are on concerta and have ADHD will use this as a crutch for their behavior so they feel they can do what they want. So controling the behavior that a child exhibits is a lot of work and lot of ground breaking but it is doable with the right support from everyone invovled. Frist is to look into the doage (which I'm pretty sure you have already done so far) After that it's down sticking to your guns. The biggest thing is to get your child to accept resposibility for his/her actions. Then there should be conseqeunces for the undesired behavior. This consequences should be something that you know your child really wants. Sometimes it can be something directly towards the behavior. For example, let's just say your child just kicked a chair, then you take the chair away and explain the reasons whyYour child will not be allowed to use a chair. Now this may sound crazy but trust me after an hour of sitting on the floor and standing, it's not fun anymore. The Key is to get kids to recongnize the behavior. They will say they don't care but trust me, they do!!

Katie - posted on 07/19/2009

3

8

1

My 9 year old was on the same medication a month ago, i was having no end of troubles he was always getting in fights at school, back chatting and arguing with myself and his teachers, he was also always on a short fuse and nearly always became violent followed by being very emotional. I also felt very deflated thinking my son had become out of control, when I took him to see the doctor she enlightened me she had had alot of parents who were also having the same problems and told me that all of the problems I was having were part of the side effects. We decided to change him over on to Equasym XL he is on 40 mg this seems to have helped with the problem and he has calmed down alot. He had been on this before and it wasn't working but since the doctor uped it from 30mg to 40mg... Hope this has helped

Sandy - posted on 07/18/2009

2

4

0

I have two boys with ADHD. They have tried a variety of different medications. My advice is to ask about changing medications, especially if they are having behavioral problems.
Each of my boys is on a different medication. I was reluctant to try my younger one on the current medication (which he is doing quite well on) because the older one had tried it and was sent home for "agressively arguing" with one of this teachers. I am sure if we had not had such a good relationship with the school officials, teachers and IEP staff he probably would have been suspended or expelled rather than just sent home for the day. Needless to say, we immediately talked with his pediatrician and changed his medication.
The doctor should be giving you questionairs for the teachers as well as yourself to fill out which help assess how well the medication is working and if a dose adjustment or change in medication is needed. The questionairs actually calculate a score of how well your child is doing on his medication. (You may have been asked to fill something similar when your child was diagnosed.)
One thing to keep in mind is that they are often very emotional at the end of the day when the medications are wearing off (I have seen this with all the different medications we have tried.) They cry, go hide in their room and sulk, or lash out in anger over things that we normally wouldn't even find worthy of a response. In this case, I find letting them cool off (as long as they are not hurting others or themselvess) then talk with them later about what happen. I find just after they have gotten in bed for the night is a good time because they are usually calmer then. I also try to find out the underlying problem rather than brining up what actually happen.

Michelle - posted on 07/18/2009

4

21

0

I have a 14 year old son that has ADD/ADHD and ODD. He was diagnosed with the ADD/ADHD in kindergarten and then at 13 was diagnosed with the ODD. My son has been on a ton of diiferent meds. He gets used to them and they stop working and we have to change them. He was just recently in the hospital for 4 weeks so that they could get his meds right. He was so out of control that the school couldn't even handle him. I would end up in my room every night in tears wondering what to do and how to help him. He has to be on a set schedule also or he flips out. He was so out of control before he went in to the hospital that he would damage anything in sight, he put homes in my walls, he would hit and kick everything, he would throw stuff, screamed at us saying he hated us and that we supposably hated him and everything else. He is now on Strattera, adderall, depakote and Geodon. He was getting kicked out of school and everything else every week. He couldn't sit still. He would take off and leave the house without permission. He is doing alot better but the main advice I tell people is read up on it and learn to have patience. Make sure you have a set routine also. He will be in high school in the fall and that is a big step for him also. Every child is different and what works with some won't work with others. My email address is michellekarber@yahoo.com if anyone has any questions. Also I know there are advocates that can help you with the school to get IEPs and Section 504's. There is help out there it is just hidden and very hard to find. Good luck all and remember I am here if anyone has any questions.

Angie - posted on 07/17/2009

4

15

0

OMG..I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT YOU R GOING THROUGH...MY SON IS 10 HE TAKES 54 MG OF CONCERTA ONCE A DAY.HE WAS DIAGNOSED 2 YEARS AGO...AND I DID NOT WANT HIM ON MEDS...I TRIED CHANGIN HIS DIET AND THAT DIDN'T WORK....HE WENT TO MEDS...AND AT FIRST THEY GAVE HIM HEADACHES AND MADE HIS STOMACHE SICK...BUT HIS BODY GOT USED TO IT..MY BIGGEST MISTAKE WAS PUTTING THE EXSUSES OF HIE BAD BEHAVOR ON HIE ADHD...WE R NOW TEACHING HIM THAT EVEN THOUGH HE IS ADHD....HE WILL STILL BE RESPONSIBLE FOR HIS ACTIONS...OUR EXAMPLE TO HIM WAS...THAT WHEN HE GETS OLDER IF HE DOES SOMETHING BAD..THE COPS WILL NOT CARE WETHER HE TOOK HIS MEDS THAT DAY...AND THAT HE WILL ALWAYS BE ACCOUNTABLE FOR HIS ACTIOINS...AS HE GETS OLDER HE IS GETTING BETTER AT CONTROLING HIMSELF...I HOPE THE BEST FOR A PARENT WITH A ADHD CHILD.....IT TAKES A LOT OF PATIENCE AT TIMES...GOOD LUCH EVERYONE

Nadine - posted on 07/17/2009

0

0

0

Hi, I have a soon to be 8 yr son who is gifted and his abilities include Aspergers, ADHD (impulsive type), OCD, DBD, and Pica. I have recently found a great mix of meds for him. Vyvanse, Abilify, Flouxitine. Now they Vyvanse is for ADHD and is supposed to last 12 hours however he takes another dose in the afternoon which really helps.



My youngest son is 6 and his abilities include ODD and ADHD (may be bipolar) He takes Vyvanse and it does last 12 hours for him.

Charlene - posted on 07/16/2009

15

41

1

Quoting Jessica:

I need advise, son with ADHD is out of control.

My 11 yr old son has ADHD. He is on concerta for meds and I have lost all control with him. He is disruptive at school and at home. I have tried every form of punishment I can think of along with numerous reward incentive programs to try to get him to listen, help out, and just simply be respectful. I am at my wits end. Does anyone have some advise?


I think its the med my son is the same way

Lisa - posted on 07/15/2009

4

13

0

My son has been diagnosed with ADHD and anxiety disorder.... But please dont just go by the behavioral chart/form have blood work done, to see if it isnt his thyroid or diabetes... or even food allergies. Also start seeking therapy, behavioral and see if you can get someone in to the house to de-ADHD the home. Get charts for things like 6:00 am get up and dressed, 6:15 eat breakfast. Children need structure. I know this doesnt work for all children but it does help. Look into Omega-3's, DHA, Magnesium... organic milks. My son is pre-puberty and that can affect moods and meds. Read, read and read more there is so much info. Also I belong to a great group on Cafemom.com (ADHD and us) it is a group of mom's with children with many same issues and chat all the time. Maybe these women can also help with great advise too.
Have you found out what type of ADHD he has? Have you gone to see someone more qualified than the pediatrician? Please remember your son is just as frustrated as you are, he doesnt understand why he is doing what he is doing and why he is different than other kids his age.
My son is 12 on 54 mg of Concerta and 10mg of Lexapro, we see a therapist for behavioral issues and an IEP in school. Good luck but please make sure they don't just put him on meds have your doctor look into other issues (blood work)... everyone is fast to say ADD/ADHD and put on meds.

Dianne - posted on 07/14/2009

2

5

0

My daughter is 11 and about three years ago she was diagnosed with ADHD. I thought that my life was over, she was totally out of control. I have noticed that the meds make her calm in a sense but she is still having those dramatic mood swings. I have done my research and have opted to take her off the meds. So far, she has been without them since school ended in May and things are okay because I have incorporated the holistic approach through natural remedies. NativeRemedies.com has been a life saver for me and I can see a great change in her behavior. I keep her busy with activities that will stimulate her mind and challenge the body as well. Don't give up, try another option. Don't get me wrong the meds were good at first but they were making my daughter have an addictive behavior and I thought that as she grows older we would have another issue.

[deleted account]

There is a GREAT book called You and Your ADD Child that EVERY parent of an ADD/ADHD parent should read. Just because they have ADHD it does not give them license to misbehave. They are making choices and choices have consequences. I have 3 ADHD boys and a boy with Aspergers and We are doing the best with our youngest one because we do not give him the excuse of ADHD for his bad behavior.

Nancy - posted on 07/14/2009

5

21

0

This is from Dr.Corinne Allen:



Dr. Corinne Allen is an international researcher and practitioner in natural health and nutrition and has been in practice for more than 30 years. After receiving her doctorate in nutrition, Dr. Allen went on to more training in neurokinesiology and brain-stimulation techniques. She is recognized for her natural and practical approach to health regarding natural and alternative methods of stimulating permanent changes in the brain in dyslexia, ADD, autism, Asperger’s syndrome, learning disabilities, academic and behavioral issues and brain injuries. “As soon as I heard about MaxGXL, I knew it was important,” she says. “It has been the most significant product that I have ever used for the nutritional support of the brain and nervous system. I have never seen such fast, amazing and life-changing results from a single nutritional supplement. I work with all levels of brain injuries, mild to severe, and I find that from babies on up, if they have brain, emotional or developmental issues, they are severely lacking in glutathione.”



Speaking of her own experience with MaxGXL, Dr. Allen said, “My energy level has doubled. I find that I have more sustained energy for 12 to 15 hours a day. My organization and management of my work has become better. My stress levels have greatly dropped. My stamina and endurance have increased.” Dr. Allen feels that we live in a world full of heavy chemicalization with disregard for proper nutrition. You can greatly reduce problems with glutathione supplementation. That is not to say artificial glutathione injection, but with a way to introduce into the body the components the body needs to produce glutathione on its own. That way is MaxGXL!



For more info you could contact me: nancycote677@hotmail.com,



You could also go take a look at www.maxgxl.com/27880

Kara - posted on 07/14/2009

1

5

0

Call me crazy.... look at what he is eating. At first my husband thought I was a loon. Until he saw it first hand. Our son CAN NOT tolerate RED 40. He turns into a monster. He growls, rolls on the ground, screams, bites, pulls hair etc, after he has eaten something with this dye in it. A lot of foods and drinks out there have this food coloring in it. If his behavior is spiking after he has a snack or meal? My son is usually a "good kid" but this stuff makes him crazy!

Laura - posted on 07/14/2009

2

23

0

My daughter was diagnosed as ADHD Combined type 3 years ago...everyday is a struggle with her even with the meds. She takes Vyvanse 40 mg. Stays up all night sleeps all day when she can. The meds helped her grades but not her behavior at home.
I hate to say this but she is the most hateful child I have ever seen, very sloppy still at age 10. She could eat something clear and still get it all over her face. I have tried reward systems ect seems nothing I do works...I dont know what else to do or where to turn.

Shannon - posted on 07/13/2009

12

14

0

I also tried not medicating on weekends and summer,ect. but found out that it only helps things like trying toget them to eat better. My doctor thinks it is best to keep them on it cause the meds stay balanced not up and down all the time. It has made a difference in my son. Though now that I have chnged I am not a fan of concerta anymore. My son sleeps better and acts better now that he has changed meds.

Shannon - posted on 07/13/2009

12

14

0

My son is 10 and has been on Concerta for about 5 years and just changed him to Vyvance. He was a pain. School home it never mattered it was pure crazyness. I could not stand it anymore. Vyvance is great! It has also been better due to counseling as well.

[deleted account]

I feel your pain Jessica! My oldest son is 12 years old and we waited until he was in 3rd grade (8 years) to put him on medication for his ADHD. What a disservice we did to him and his teachers!!! And my husband and I are both elementary school teachers! Go figure. Anyway, my son started on Concerta and we could not get the dosing right. Darren is small for his age (12 and only 67 pounds)...so the concerta made his appetite pretty much go away. He wouldn't eat and never felt hungry. At the lower doses we didn't notice any change. At the higher doses he was like a zombie, until the meds wore off then he went into a rage! So we changed his medication to Adderall and he was constantly fighting with our 3 other children. He got very aggressive. Now he has been on Daytrana, which is a patch that he puts on his hip every morning. His mood seems more stable and he has fewer outbursts...although his closest sister sets him off quite easily (I think this is just because of the closeness in their age). He takes the patch off at around 4:00 PM and he is able to finish his homework fairly easily. His grades have improved and he even makes honor roll now. I would closely monitor you son's moods and behaviors. Ask him how he is feeling, what thoughts he has about taking the medication, etc. By the way, I have also been diagnosed with Adult ADD and am currently taking concerta. It is working for me, although I can tell when it is losing its effect. Best of luck to you and your son. It's like any other illness or disease: would you deny your child chemotherapy or insulin if they needed it? I certainly wouldn't.

Carla - posted on 07/13/2009

1

0

0

MUSIC!!!! 2 of my boys were diagnosed ADHD and I have found that giving them an instrument is great therapy!!! My boys WERE on meds for many years, from Aderall to Ridalin, and everything in between. And the side effects were worse, than dealing with a hyper kid! We took them off the meds, gave them musical instruments, and art supplies (i.e. paint canvases and an isle) and let them at it! They have been med free for 3 years now, my oldest is now playing with an award winning high school concert band, and my 10 year old is on honor roll. All with out meds!! Allthough every case is different, I have learned that they need prayer not a pill, and that with the grace of God, and an outlet for the energy, they will be fine. Don't get me wrong, it is hard, but it's worth it!!!

Beatriz - posted on 07/13/2009

1

11

0

My son is 10 years old he also has ADHD. When ever I'm going to loose control i remember that it's not his fault he has ADHD. I calm down and get down to his level and talk to him about his behavior.

Terri - posted on 07/13/2009

2

30

0

I know a child that would destroy things and his mother use to give him coffee every morning. He could be bouncing off the walls and she would have him drink some coffee and he would be just as calm. It was amazing to see the difference.

Terri - posted on 07/12/2009

2

30

0

i would suggest trying something that is not a controlled substance...my son, who is now 20, was on concerta and a couple more that we tried, all ended with lost hope and a son who thought the answer for every thing was to take pills. Sadly he had a drug problem when he got older. He was off the medicine for about three years before he started taking street drugs, which would give the same effect as concerta.

He is no longer on any drugs, thank you Jesus!!!

After talking to him now,he said that he felt like he was always in trouble( when he was younger) any way so he just got to where he didnt care anymore.



I have found that if he wasnt doing well in school or was acting up, I did not talk about it to any one else in front of him. If i did he was taking it as me praising him for acting up, keep every thing positive.

Joyce - posted on 07/12/2009

1

9

0

I have a fourteen year old daughter who was on concerta for many years around 12 years old concerta stopped working for her. I thought she was just being rebellious when in fact her meds stopped working for her. You should have him reassesed. I didn't have my daughter reassessed til recently and regret not doing it earlier. She is on a new medicine now and things have improved greatly.

Jodi - posted on 07/12/2009

1

15

0

I feel for you and am going through the same kind of problem. My son is 11 and recently he has gotten out of control. He has gotten disruptive in school and very disrespectful at home. I have also tried to figure out if he is being infulenced by his friends..which hasn't been helpful. He is also extreamly lazy for having so much energy. I wish i had some advise because i know i allway's feel like i am yelling or constantly telling him you don't do this or that!! IIt is very frustrating.. My only advise is hang in there!!! I am hoping things get better for all of us.. The last resort for me is counciling..Which I have cheked into..I just feel like I am missing something..Good Luck!!

Priscilla - posted on 07/11/2009

2

9

0

Hi my seven year old has adhd and he was kicked out of school in kindergarten. I put him on adderall and you wouldn't believe the change. Side effects that I notice for a week or so after any dosage adjustment are nightmares, lack of appetite, increased thirst, but those are things I can deal with. What I try to do with my son that seems to work is one on one time everyday where nothing else is allowed to interfere. This is hard because I have two teenagers and a 5yr old step daughter. It is important to him though and I see a noticable difference in him. The trick for me is not trying to "control" the situation. I let him choose what to do, when he starts to get agitated and talk so fast his words can't keep up with his brain I have him stop talking, take a few deep breaths, think about what he wants to say and say it slowly. Doing this with him regularly has made a tremendous improvement to his attitude and communication progress. Their problem is not knowing how to communicate what their brains are up to. They need stimulation. And one last thing I have noticed with my son is that he finds peace in repetition. Word searches, sorting decks of cards, organizing anything colorful, rubiks cubes, simply writing from one to five hundred will keep him busy happily for hours. Anyway, I know that is a lot said hope it wasn't too much.

Stacy - posted on 07/10/2009

12

13

1

you are not alone! i have a 10 yr old daughter and we are going thru the same thing. i have 3 children all together and our lives have been turned upside down. we don't go many places because you never know when she will have a melt down and there seems to be nothing to prevent. we've tried every reward and punishment program in the world and she just does not care. other parents judge us they do not want their kids around her. at this time she has totall control of our lives and i have no clue how to stop it. i know this don't help you but please know you are not alone. please keep in touch as i am a great listener and would love to hear if you find anything that works i wish you well on your journey.

Lauren - posted on 07/07/2009

3

25

0

Hi Phyllis, I've been reading your story and some others. My son is 7 and we started seeing problems with him when he was 2. At that point the diagnosed him with a development delay and we started there. When he was about 4 I brought him to his peditrician to have him tested for ADHD and his doctor diagnosed him in about 5 minutes and prescribed Concerta. I only gave it to him once he had such a reaction to it almost like he was on crack/cocaine. He couldn't think, couldn't stop sweating, fidgiting it was horrible. I changed peditricians and they referred us to get him tested by a psychologist. She did full on testing for 2 days (about 8 hours) and we got a full diagnosis and information about ADHD and perticurlaly about Ethen and how it affected him. Our doctor gave us a rx for Stratera, I was very worried about this since my first experience with meds. My doctor told me all about it how it's not a controlled substance so I don't have to go to his doctor every month to get the rx, he can call it in to the pharmacy. We have seen such a change in him it's AMAZING!!!!

We live in Florida and here there is a scholarship call The McKay Scholarship. With this the state will pay a portion of tution for him to go into a private school. I don't know where you live, or if they have something like this there, but let me tell you a combination of medication and this new school has been miraculous. He loves to go to school now, it's summer time and he can't wait to get back there. It's a montessori school where it's hands on (they are actually allowed out of their chairs to learn). Don't get me wrong public schools are great for kids that don't have learning problems, but in our experience it didn't do him any good. I was on a first name basis with his principal from the public school. Now I get letters home from his teacher telling us how wonderful he's doing, he's a joy to be around. There is hope I just wanted to let you know I've been there and there is light at the end of the tunnel. Hope this helps.

Phyllis - posted on 06/30/2009

580

23

189

Quoting Jessamyn:



Quoting Phyllis:

My son has been through every sitter in town, adult or otherwise, which is why I cant work right now. Hopefully once he is in school full time, I can get out and work, but until then....People just dont seem to get how tough it is to get out. I keep hearing "Oh just get a sitter!" Right, he is on the black list at the daycare and at every sitter in the area. We dont even qualify for respite care or anything. My sister used to watch him, but since he made her cry, we dont even go over there anymore. I actually had someone suggest we needed an exorsism! Not sure if he was serious, but it sure made me laugh!






OMG....I'm right there with you. My DD is 6 by the grace of God...LOL..NO ONE IN MY WORLD wants to babysit....Unfortunately, she is the oldest of four, the others have their own little problems, health and mental health; she just finds horrible things to do and leads the rest astray. I could list tons of things, but the most recent was her   A) blockading me IN the house  B) her locking me OUT of the house--we have to have all the windows and doors locked to keep her IN, so she locked the screen door, which i have no hidden key for--YET






I keep asking the psychiatrist to give her some kind of ADHD med, but so far, all they've given her is Prozac for anxiety. Next month I'm going to have a serious talk with the psych, because summer has only started and I already want to ship them all to Timbuktu...thanks to her...






 






 





OMG! I have locks on both sides of all the doors in the house (my kingdom for the chance to pee in private!) and locks on EVERY cupboard and on the fridge....visitors think we're insane! I have been locked in, locked out, and I can now remove a door from its hinges in under 60 seconds! We have keys hidden everywhere, plus my neighbor has a copy of each one! I cannot believe how diabolically clever a 5 yr old can be!!!!!!!!



 

[deleted account]

Quoting Leana :

Hi All of You Moms....one's that can relate to me and my son at least. My son has ADHD and I am in tears most of each week, he is extremely clever but does everything that is different, loves negative attention. I am devorced and got remarried with an amazing man that loves my boys. My son seems to get me very angry and in the end everybody is fighting. He talks about suicide and cries allot. He is on Ritilin 30mg one a day, still .... no difference, just headaches, does concentrate better at school, but he is angry en rude. I am with my back against the wall, tired of fighting, tired of crying, tired of not having time with my other two boyz.....I am tired. xxx



I don't know what type of facilities are available in your area (we live by Pittsburgh, so there's a vast amount of health care thru UPMC), but I think you should seriously consider putting your son inpatient somewhere. He could then do a "step down" unit somewhere, before reassimilating into the home and community.  This is nothing to be ashamed of, for you or him...no one asked to have these problems; but they are there and they need to be addressed. I wish you the best of luck----get out the phone book and look for psychiatric care...asap

[deleted account]

Quoting Phyllis:

My son has been through every sitter in town, adult or otherwise, which is why I cant work right now. Hopefully once he is in school full time, I can get out and work, but until then....People just dont seem to get how tough it is to get out. I keep hearing "Oh just get a sitter!" Right, he is on the black list at the daycare and at every sitter in the area. We dont even qualify for respite care or anything. My sister used to watch him, but since he made her cry, we dont even go over there anymore. I actually had someone suggest we needed an exorsism! Not sure if he was serious, but it sure made me laugh!



OMG....I'm right there with you. My DD is 6 by the grace of God...LOL..NO ONE IN MY WORLD wants to babysit....Unfortunately, she is the oldest of four, the others have their own little problems, health and mental health; she just finds horrible things to do and leads the rest astray. I could list tons of things, but the most recent was her   A) blockading me IN the house  B) her locking me OUT of the house--we have to have all the windows and doors locked to keep her IN, so she locked the screen door, which i have no hidden key for--YET



I keep asking the psychiatrist to give her some kind of ADHD med, but so far, all they've given her is Prozac for anxiety. Next month I'm going to have a serious talk with the psych, because summer has only started and I already want to ship them all to Timbuktu...thanks to her...



 



 

Ann-marie - posted on 06/10/2009

6

10

0

my son is 12 and has adhd for the past year i had the same problem so i now how you feel but for the last two months my son has been going to art thearpy and his moods seemed to have carmed down they not totally gone but it has made a differnce

Tammy - posted on 06/09/2009

4

9

0

Hey Leana! I am sooo sorry to hear all this about your son. How old is your son? My son is 12 and he has ADD/Depression/Anxiety - my son couldn't take Ritalin at all - tried it a few years ago - he was on it for a couple of months, I guess, but it gave him terrible headaches, no appetite and the doctor changed his medicine to Focalin. I don't give my son any ADD medicine during the summer and he is doing really well. You definitely need to let your son's doctor know about how your son is doing on the Ritalin and how he is talking about suicide - sounds like this medicine isn't working well at all with him. The doctor definitely needs to know so he can help your son. I will be praying for you, your son - your entire family. Hang in there!

Leana - posted on 06/08/2009

1

13

0

Hi All of You Moms....one's that can relate to me and my son at least. My son has ADHD and I am in tears most of each week, he is extremely clever but does everything that is different, loves negative attention. I am devorced and got remarried with an amazing man that loves my boys. My son seems to get me very angry and in the end everybody is fighting. He talks about suicide and cries allot. He is on Ritilin 30mg one a day, still .... no difference, just headaches, does concentrate better at school, but he is angry en rude. I am with my back against the wall, tired of fighting, tired of crying, tired of not having time with my other two boyz.....I am tired. xxx

Kaleigh - posted on 05/30/2009

2

16

0

I just want to say- it makes me feel better to know that I'm not the only one dealing with these behaviors and struggling with them. As a single mom, it's a huge relief to have other people you can talk to about this, even with the support of my friends, they don't always "get it".

Kaleigh - posted on 05/30/2009

2

16

0

My 12 year old daughter has A.D.H.D.,S.I.D., and P.D.D.-N.O.S..

She has been on Concerta for 4 years now.It is wonderful!! She is capable of doing her school work (still has a full time T.A. though) and is capable of having friends, sleeping,eating, and a wide range of other things that were completely unheard of before. I will tell you though, even with all the improvements, she still has "fits" on occasion, and I've discovered that if she isn't too far gone, talking to her like an adult, and asking her why, seems to work the best to de-escalate, and it opens up communication between you. It will be hard, but the hugs, kisses, smiles,and wall portraits make it all worth while.Also, getting a break from each other is always a beautiful thing for you both!! Good luck!

Tammy - posted on 05/28/2009

4

9

0

Phyllis, I feel sooo sorry for you. My husband is an adult with ADD (he has never been on meds), but when our son was diagnosed, I told my husband we are putting our son on meds because I didn't want him to grow up and become like my hubby (my hubby got so frustrated and nobody thought about ADD back then - hubby is 42 - but anyway, hubby couldn't concentrate, focus, etc., so he decided he would drop out of high school when he was in the 11th grade). My hubby did go after we got married and got his GED (thank GOD), but I have noticed that since hubby and I have been married (it'll be 20 years this August), hubby has went through at least 15 different jobs - mostly trucking jobs - and right now hubby is unemployed so you can see why I definitely didn't want my son going through so much frustration and end up quitting school. My hubby actually wanted our son to be on meds, but even if he hadn't agreed, I would have put him on it anyway. My son doesn't take any meds during the summer, but he doesn't bounce off walls - he's not really hyper - his is more concentration, focus, distracted easily - that type. I can handle my son better than my hubby - he has no patience with our son, but I think that's because he has ADD too. I really feel for you, Phyllis. I'll mention the Melatonin and upping the Clonidine to family doctor and see what he thinks. My son already feels like he needs his Focalin increased anyway - he doesn't think the 5 MG is working. I'm so glad I found this support group - makes me feel like I'm not alone.

Phyllis - posted on 05/28/2009

580

23

189

My son is in the same boat, only its his dad, not the Dr. My son said to me yesterday, after throwing a beer bottle at his brother and almost killing him..."I'm sorry Mom...my brain was fast moving in circles and wouldnt stop me!" How hard is it to hear that from a child so young....even he knows he needs help, but his dad is so against it....

If you see this, leave this form field blank.
Powered by RESPECT not THUMPS

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms