"Gotcha Day"

Winnie - posted on 01/06/2009 ( 12 moms have responded )

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I am going to address my son's adoption as a blessing, and that his birthmom loved him so much, but wanted to give him a great life, even if it meant she could not give to him herself. One thing we do to talk about the goodness of his adoption, is to celebrate what we call "Gotcha Day", which is the day we were able to bring him home. He enjoys being able to celebrate the fact that he is a part of our family, but knows he was loved by his birth family too. On Gotcha Day, he gets a small present to open. It is great opportunity to talk to him about adoption.

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Lori - posted on 01/11/2009

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We call it "Lora Day." On the day her adoption was finalized, we had a huge party for family and very close friends. We planted a tree in our yard. Beforehand, I asked everyone present to write a message or a wish for Lora. That night we read all the wishes and I put them in a special box. Someday she will be able to sit under her tree and read how her family felt that day..

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J M - posted on 02/06/2013

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I take it was a Open Adoption as you said bio Mother love her baby so very much etc?? Then What about the bio Mum what would they celebrating? the saddest day in her life?

Where one may of "Gotcha another's baby", that other( the bio Mum) would be a sad time, specially when you say here, "that you are going to address to your child his Bio Mom loved him so much", what would you say if the child then says, can his Bio Mum join in the celebration to? just what would you say? she she loves him but sorry no she cannot come and join in, because??? just wondered how you would handle when your baby later on/ grown child teen asks can she the bio mum join in to?

"While I get" the reason for the people who "get" the baby/ child, I think every day should be as good, and really nothing to celebrate on the bio mums side, rather would of been the hardest saddest decision she could of made, if you love your baby now soo much as their bio,if the new parents just think a moment from the bio Mums perceptive, would you still celebrate "for just you sake"?, as honestly is is about what you get here calling it Gotcha Day"?

While don't want to spoil the very happy occasion as is to the new parents, I think people forget, Its a loss for a babies Mum and that baby and or a child can be a loss, just how would on celebrate that fact?

This has been a made up word, "marketed just for one side ".( no I see some what to buy trinkets about the Day? um.
Like I say understand the day for the parents who received, but.....

Cannot imagen a baby that grows up having no choice to feel happy every time they are made to remember when they where taken from their Bio Mothers.

As innocent as it is "and with all the good intentions as "you feel", still its a loss for the main people who gave up part of themselves.

Nicholle - posted on 06/11/2009

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We have three children that we have adopted through foster care. The first two are siblings and their adoption was finalized on Adoption Day 2007. The third one we adopted her in June of 2008. We just had her 2 year anniversary date of when she came to us, June 8. 2007. We celebrate all three of the kids adoptions in November on Adoption Day and visit the court house with all the other families adopting that day and have cake and cookies with them. We always talk openly with the kids that yes their birth moms loved them which is important for them to know the moms just couldn't keep them safe and so they are with us, we love them and can keep them safe. Our kids have seen some terrible things, one has been abused and was burnt by an adult, so they understand not being kept safe.

Winnie - posted on 01/25/2009

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Kristen, I love the idea of taking the cupcakes to her school, that is an awesome idea -how cool!

Kristin - posted on 01/25/2009

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Hi Winnie,




We celebrate Gotcha day much the same way, however for us, Gotcha day is our adoption day. I was a foster parent first and for us, even though the day I got her was special, I was never sure she was going to stay with me. So, my family decided that Gotcha day would be the day she became an offical part of the family. So far we have only celebrated 1 gotcha day, but the 2nd is approaching in March. Last year, I took cup cakes to her school and we looked at pictures from the big day the year before. What a special tradtion.

Heather - posted on 01/14/2009

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My son's birthday is very close to Christmas so we tend to celebrate that more quitely. Gotcha day was Mother's day '07 and since that's further away from a big holiday, we celebrate that as his big gift day and call it family day.
Our daughter's birthday is March 17th and that's very close to when we'll be travelling so I'm not sure what we'll do there yet.
Heather BT

Amy - posted on 01/12/2009

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We adopted Ty at birth, so we celebrate that already.  We were lucky enough to finalize his adoption on Nov 15th, which was National Adoption day...We haven't decided if we will celebrate, but I think it will be a special family day for us for sure :)

Kristan - posted on 01/12/2009

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As of now we celebrate twice, once for family the day (the day we met her (we also have two boys). After the boys got home from school we spent the day doing something special as a family for our first one.



Then we celebrate adoption day with a meal we ate a lot while in Kaz on the dishes carried all the way home from Kaz, and it wasn't easy!



On my daughters family birthday cake we added one candle to represent her birth mother. Continuing that or not will be up to her as she gets older, but I think of all days that would be a day she may be thinking about her birth mother and I want her to know that we are too.

Lori - posted on 01/12/2009

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Hi Winnie! It was a private, domestic adoption. She actually came from my own home town. And it is open, with quite a bit of contact with her entire birth family, not just her birth mother. I know that not everyone could handle such an arrangement, but it works very well for us...

Winnie - posted on 01/12/2009

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Wow, that is really cool Lori, I remeber having a celebrating party once our son's adoption was final. Doing the letters was a really awesome idea. I bet she will appreciate them when she is older. Did you do a domestic adoption or international?

Christine - posted on 01/11/2009

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we celebrate gotcha day and adoption day. my daughter loves it and it makes her feel really good.

Tamela - posted on 01/10/2009

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Great Idea! We call it "Happy Day"! Only because it was the happiest day of our lives! Each year we celebrate with a small gift and special dinner just with Mommy and Daddy!



 

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