Anne - posted on 05/24/2011
We got our daughter at 8 days. Our adoption agency didn't even tell us the name on the original birth certificate. They asked us if we had picked a name and that was the name they put onto all of the paperwork from that day on. When the adoption was finalized, it was finalized with the name we had picked and we have a normal birth certificate with the name we gave her and us as her parents.
We found out later, by chance, what name her birth mother had originally given her (we did a closed adoption) and we are glad we gave her a new one.
Jessica - posted on 05/06/2011
I was given the opportunity to name my son. The birthmother and I discussed names when we met a few days before he was born. If it was a girl, I had a first name picked, but I wanted to use the birthmother's name as her middle name. I asked her if there were any significant males in her family whom she would like to honor if it was a boy . She did not, but the name Joshua which I picked for a first name set well with her. Thus my son was named. I think if I ever adopt again, I hope to do the same.
Bridget - posted on 10/26/2010
We have 5 children all adopted from Foster Care. For each one, we kept or changed the names for different reasons.
My oldest daughter and son are bio siblings and came to us at ages 3 & 5. They were 5 & 7 by the time of the adoption. We completely left my daughters first and middle name the same as per her request not to change anything, she is Tera Nicole. My son, we kept his first name and his middle name is now what was originally his birth last name, he is Cody Duncan. Then we gave them both our last name.
My youngest son came to us at 15 months old. He was 2 1/2 by the time we adopted him. He knew both his first and middle name and we struggled on wether or not to change any part of it. As it turned out we decided to keep both of them the same as we felt his first name suited him and us and his middle name was a family name of a special relative who was deceased. He is Noah Allen.
My middle daughter came to us as Alexis Marie, but going by the nick name of Lexi at 18 months old. If you asked her what her name was, she was tell you, Lexi. So that made it really simple for us as far as a first name. We decided to change her middle name to my middle name. She is 2 1/2 now at adoption time and her name is Lexi Ann.
My youngest daughter came to us at 3 days old. She was named by her birth parents, but as soon as we were able to, we changed her name to what is now, Michaela Jo. Both are family names for me.
All of our children have our last name of course.
All of my children have some contact with members of thier birth family, be it birth mom's, aunts, cousins, grandparents... All of them are aware of any name changes and happy or not are all very accepting and cooperative.
P - posted on 10/09/2010
I haven't been on in awhile. But I have loved reading how and why you used the names you did...
For our oldest daughter, her birth day, was a name we had on our list. Since it was private, and we only had temp custody at first, she learned her birth name, and my nick name for her. And being as it was going to be her middle name anyway, because it was after a family member and Biblical, we planned to keep it. In the end it became her first name, as we were all use to, and her middle name is after my dad and myself. Elizabeth (Elissa) MaLynn. Then the baby was in foster car for the first 5 months, and her foster mother knew she would not ever likely return to the bio family, so she never taught her name. So we had a nick name for her, and then started teaching her the name would would give her at adoption time. Her first name was after my mom (lee) and hubbys grandma (kay). Hubby picked her first middle name, and her 2nd is after my sister who is very ill. So we have our Kaylee Daytona Ann. Of course, both have our last names.
Laurie - posted on 10/04/2010
My children were adopted through the foster care system. My oldest was two at the time. My biggest fear was how the child's name was used towards her, (eg. Lacey, you (add profanity here), come here). I also tested her response to her birth name and she didn't even respond to her own name. I am guessing that she had nick names, as she didn't seem to know her own name. SO, I gave her the name I wanted (first, middle, and last). my other two were much younger and spent all their foster care time in one loving foster home. My son had a name I just could not use for anything, and his foster mom couldn't read the original paperwork with his name on it, thus she called him something entirely different from his birth name. I named him after my father (first, middle, last). I transitioned by using both names for a while as he was 13 months old at the time. My youngest was four months old when she came home. I named her the name I would have given her at birth had I been allowed to. They all know their birth names, and that I wanted to name them what I did because they were my children.
Lydia - posted on 09/01/2010
It's good hearing from others. My husband and I had a sibling group of 3 placed with us for adoption ages 6, 8, 9. Even before placement our worker was wanting to know what we would call them and told us we needed to be willing to change the names completely if the kids really wanted. We had just planned to keep their first names, change the last name and change or add a middle name on how attached they were to the middle name. We if course needed more time and wanted to dicuss the names with the kids because of their ages. Our oldest girl wanted to change her name completely, however we real loved her first name Alyssa. Wwe were able to agree on a spelling change to Alyssah. We also gave her my middle name Rose. Ryan is the middle one and our boy. He actually told my husband he wanted to be named after him! Of course this wasn't real what he wanted but was trying to attach himself to us and I think a safety thing in his mind. We really liked the name Ryan too and in the end he is happy keeping it. We also changed his middle name to Anthony, after my brother's name. Our baby is Haylee and she actually wanted to go by her middle name. This was more of a struggle because we really like Haylee and didn't care for the middle name (especially as a first name.) It took us two months before we came up with the middle name Rayne (pronounced Rain.) She loved it!
So we now have: Alyssah Rose, Ryan Anthony, and Haylee Rayne.
Sue - posted on 09/01/2010
I had the opportunity to name our daughter - she is extended family member. I think that if you get the child at birth you should name her what you want. If she is older and already knows her name that would be harder and i would have to think long and hard about the reasons to change the name!
User - posted on 08/20/2010
I only kept her first name because she was 2 when she came into our home and 6 when we adopted. We gave her a hawaiian anme and our last name. The name has a family importance since my hubby is born and raised Hawaiian /Samoan in Hawaii. She was our snnow white gift from the heavens and so we anmed her Haukea Kalei'Okalani we wished at times we had changed every part of her name, because she wanted to have such a new start fresh. I felt her identity was so important and to take away her first anme may have been taking away such a peice of her that would have neg. impact once she was old enough to realize we had taken her first name. I think for us it was the right thing to do. Yes, she has contact with Birth Mom and she is aware of the name change. Not happy but understands as much as she can why we choose to change it.
Beth - posted on 08/08/2010
We were able to name our child at birth per the birth mother's wishes. We are now adopting internationally and plan to keep at least part of the child's original name as the middle name but plan on picking out a new first name. We want to keep part of their name so they have a connection to that part of their life but want them to also have a connection to our family and the country they will be raised in
Shanna - posted on 08/08/2010
We got our daughter as a foster child at 3 1/2 weeks. We changed her name completely. It was Jasmine Pearl, but we changed it to a biblical name Rebekah and her middle name is my mom's middle name, Lynn. I think it is important for the adopted child to have a link to the adoptive family by name. She has since been adopted by us and is almost 7 years old.
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