3 Values for raising a boy into a proud and productive black man

Anita - posted on 05/23/2009

I agreewih Tiphini that lying is a huge problem for black men. I encourage my boys to tell the truth, when they do they are rewarded with lesser punishments for bad behavior. Positive reinforcement works wonders on young children.



Also, taking them to church to learn moral fortitude is essential. They need to be around other kids that are taught the same values.

Tiphini - posted on 05/22/2009

Hello Latisha! First off, let me say your 3 core values for raising a productive man in today's society are exactly what every woman should be instilling in there children. My fiancee and I have 3 boys of our own (4yrs, 2yrs, and 5months) and he has an older son(7yrs) also. We are trying to raise our children to be the best MAN but also the best BLACK MAN that they can be. To much in today's society, our black man is revered as being lazy, lying, thuggish, no good products of their environment. I want to help change that with our 4 black babies. I want to instill in them the need but also the PASSION for education. To many of our brothers lack education and/or the will to be and do better. Responsibility/Honesty. Take responsibility first as a human being then as a man. My nana always said, Honesty is the best policy. Don't ever lie because lying shows weakness and a lack in moral character. Last BUT surely not least, Respect. Just like you said, respect must be given in order to be received.

Kathyrine - posted on 05/15/2009

this was very helpful considering my son will be here in july and have no idea how to raise him to be a great man

Anita - posted on 05/06/2009

I would add to place him around posiive, successful role models. You cannot be a strong black man for your son, so show him some!

Michelle - posted on 04/09/2009

That is a great question.  I agree with all your values.  I would add:

1.  With a relationship with God ,everything is possible.  Never give up.

2.  Make sure he thinks and learns how to contribute to society.  How he can help others instead of how he can receive help.  

3.  Help him understand the importance of doing what you say you will do (being reliable and following through).  Not just saying it ,but meaning what he says, through actions.

Latisha - posted on 03/20/2009

Hey Sarah! That's good stuff!  Thanks for responding. I'm hoping to get a good list of values "we" want to instill in our sons.

Sarah - posted on 03/20/2009

Welcome to the circle Latisha : ) I have a 4 year old son and I have similar expectations for my son. Now, I believe my top 3 values my change as my son matures and I see certain traits need to be emphasized more than others due to my son's personality and path of evolution. But, at this point I am promoting the following:

1.) Pride for ones culture and kinship. I want my son to see the beauty within his own culture group before placing such values on other cultural groups and respecting family ties.

2.)The ability  to think independently and draw conclusions based on facts. I want my son to know it's quite alright to oppose the masses as long as he knows why he has chosen such a position and it coincides with his value system.

3.)Promote the fundamental virtues of a man. This will include respect for others and ones self, strong work ethics, and the ability to assume a leadership role.