the baby mama, baby daddy titles

Tah - posted on 04/15/2010 ( 15 moms have responded )

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How do we feel when we hear somebody refer to people as these things. I know i cringe. I think it sounds so...ghetto..for lack of a better of a better word. I mean look at how they refered to our first lady..as Obama's baby mama...it def wasnt meant to be positive when they used it. Doesnt my son

s father or leah's dad sound so much better..lol....what do you ladies think?

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15 Comments

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Monica - posted on 09/06/2010

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I agree it is belittling and degrading. And I really hated it when Fantasia did her Baby Mama song...it could have been so much more empowering if she just said Single Mother.

Tah - posted on 08/30/2010

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Thank you, i have had guys that i dated or had friendships with compliment me on not saying that..it just sounds bad...

Calina - posted on 08/25/2010

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I definitely agree. I don't like the titles and don't use them personally to prompt other's not to as well. I am a mother, a daughter, a sister, a girlfriend, but NOT a baby mama. My son has a "dad," barely, but he has one, but his relation to me is NONE...just the father of my child, and I'm sticking to that!

Lacrecia - posted on 08/22/2010

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From the get go I told my daughters father to never ever refer to me as his baby mama or his BM. I’ve never referred to him as my baby daddy, and I correct people when they say where's your baby daddy? I say u mean Ariana father right? I just don't like the way it sounds it’s so childish and belittling to me I have a name and so does he mother and father.

Samantha - posted on 08/08/2010

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Lol. That does sound so much better. You could even say my son/daughters mother or father

Candace - posted on 07/01/2010

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It seems like everyone I know refer to their child's father as "babydaddy" and i'm always quick to ask if he has a name. I personally don't use it at all and asked my boyfriend not to refer to me as his baby mama

♏*PHOENIX*♏ - posted on 06/29/2010

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I agree with Angela miles, I sumtiems call my son's father My Babydaddy, (we are still happy and togetha going on 5years) It has a bad "taste" because the context in which it has been used so very much, but really the term is not wrong its how you say it and when you say it...thats what i think :-)

Jawaka - posted on 06/20/2010

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LOL@Tah Dula. I actually never heard the comment about Mrs. Obama, but no for sure that it was a knock at the Obamas and what they think of Black people and our relations. But we(as a people) condone this type of behavior by using the terminology ourselves. No matter how poor of a father(or mother) a person is referring to them as your baby's mother/father belittles whatever relationship they have with their child, as if you are saying it is ok to be that way.

Tah - posted on 06/18/2010

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he isn't a sperm donor technically since you didn't go to the bank, look through a profile and pick him to donate..lol...he may not be the best father to her, shoot, if my 13 year olds father gave me 150 dollars anytime during the year, i'd be happy...but he is still jordyn's father, or dad....even if he could be a better one, so no to me it doesn't sound better than sperm donor, but that doesn't really apply either....when they called the first lady Obama's baby mama, i am so sure it wasn't a compilment, it was meant to mock how ghetto that sounds and the people they associate with using it...

Dominique - posted on 06/12/2010

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I used to feel the same way. Then I had my Little Jordyn. Her "dad" lives in the same building as us, and still only sees MY baby once every two weeks. Sure he give me money for her, on the same days he sees her, $150, that I spend very well, but to be a father or even a daddy, you have to come around. Now I could understand this from a very young guy, but he's 34, or a man that I had a few flings with, I knew him for two an a half years, I'm not one of those women that starts trouble or pulls drama from out of you know where, so I can't fully understand this. I don't want him, he doesn't want me, I'm not dating anyone and it bothers me that he doesn't want to spend the time to get to know MY smart, sweet, beautiful child. So yes it might be a little pol. inc. to call him My Baby's Daddy, but hell, it sounds better than "Her Sperm Doner" right.

Jawaka - posted on 06/04/2010

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It makes my skin crawl, especially when the "baby" is in middle school. That's Johnny's father sounds so much better then my baby daddy

Denitra - posted on 06/02/2010

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I feel the same... Baby Daddy/ Mama is a bit past ghetto. I do feel you need to take the role to get to the right title. If the childs father is taking care of them they should be called the father of the child, if he is not doing his part he should be called the childs dad. Same goes for the mothers.

ANGELA - posted on 06/01/2010

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To be honest i think its all about how and when you use it... I think the term "baby mama" or "baby daddy" is not that bad but just dont use it in public or around people you dont know...it makes you look less or an adult if you are one....Good Post though!!!

Tah - posted on 05/24/2010

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exactly..i had 2 children when i met my husband and i always said my son/daughter's father..someone even said they liked the way i phrased that before..i had never thought about it, it just sounded like the right thing to say to me...

Nina - posted on 05/08/2010

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i'm not fond of those titles either. my husband and i have 4 children and i hate to be referred to as a "baby mama". i get really offended when someone asks "are me and my baby daddy still together?" i feel like it belittles me.

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