Do you let your baby sleep with you?

Ashley - posted on 08/09/2010 ( 214 moms have responded )

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My boyfriend leaves kinda early for work, and when he does, he wakes my daughter up(almost 3 moths old) and when he leaves I bring her in bed with me and snuggle with her and go back to bed. Is this ok? My boyfriend dosent like how I do it, he's worried that Im going to roll over on her or something. I know I wont because every little move or sound she makes I wake up. He's also worried that she's going to get into the habit of wanting to sleep in our bed. But i don't think I should worry if I only do it in the morning, should I?

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Krystal - posted on 08/15/2010

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Ive been doing the samething with my son for the past couple of months and he is 5 months old. When my partner goes to work and he has had his feed in the morning he goes for an hour sleep so do I. If he makes a sudden movement I wake up straight away. My son sleeps at least 8 hours at night in his cot so it hasnt been a problem. It doesnt matter what you do with your child its always a risk. I dont not see a problem with it.

Sabrina - posted on 08/15/2010

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I do pretty much the same thing my daughter is almost 2 months she was not sleeping in her bassinet to good so I started her with the crib but sometimes I do get nervous with her sleeping away from me so I put her in the bed with me... and also the same I wake up every move or sound she makes... I never was a big mover when i slepth anyhow...Oh and I also do it when my boyfriend watches stupid Alien movies or documentaries I get scared of the stupid storys of alien abductions lol im a wuss :-(

Tahlia - posted on 08/14/2010

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my daughter is almsot 3 months old and i find it is easier for them to sleep when they are cuddling with you in bed, me and my partner do it most nights and then i put her in her bassinet.... i really don't see the harm in sleeping with your kids :)

Misti - posted on 08/14/2010

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i do the same thing and i even do it sometimes during the day when my daughter goes down for a nap and im also exhausted. she is almost 3months. you wont always be able to cuddle with them once they get bigger so for now enjoy it!

Juanita - posted on 08/14/2010

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My lil one sleeps in her crib, witch is about a foot or 2 away from my bed.! But everyonce in a while she'll wake up ealry morn so ill get her and ill let her snuggle with me till we both wake back up. But as far as sleeping with me every night, i dont think so. Its just a hard habit to break.!

[deleted account]

we had a mini crib in our room that Eleanor slept in as a tiny infant. When she got too big for it we moved her to her own big girl crib in her nursury. This was harder for me than for her i am sure. We only put her in bed with us as a small baby when her daddy wasn't home (he goes away for work 4 days a week) in her co sleeper bed cribby thingy which has hard plastic wall that you can't roll over onto. Our bed is also a king size bed so there was lots of room for her and I. She is now almost 2 and sleeps with us only in the morning. She doesnt care either way i think but I like the extra half hour of sleep. She would get up and play if she had it her way probably. I don't think the habit is a problem. my parents did it with us when were kids. My mom thought it was nice and I think it was nice looking back. I knew that the first few moments of the day I would share with my folks. I outgrew it and so did my sisters. Its not like we were getting in their bed when we were teenagers. Eleanor knows she goes to bed in her room and thats that.

Beth - posted on 08/14/2010

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HI my son is 8 months old and still sleeps in our bed as well. When he first goes to sleep he is in his crib in his own room. When he wakes up at 2 or 3 in the morning I bring him into my bed because I am so tired. I get so much more sleep this way. But I do want him to sleep through the night and I am worried because I bring him into my bed he will never sleep through the night. I love sleeping with him though.

[deleted account]

I never co-slept with my baby and I regret that I never did. One restless night was all I could handle. . . we both slept much better with him in the bassinet.

However, my son is a great sleeper and is totally fine sleeping in a crib or playyard - he doesn't need to be cuddled or rocked to sleep.

No matter which route you choose, there will be a flip side. If she's a crib sleeper, you may feel like you missed out, but you'll be much more rested. If she sleeps with you, it may be difficult to break the pattern when she's older, but you'll have had that special time.

Tamika - posted on 08/14/2010

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I let all three of my kids sleep with me, i love to next to them, they look so good when they are sleep.

Janice - posted on 08/14/2010

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the final line is this, if u want to co sleep go for it, i didnt move at all when i had my daughter beside me, also if u do it dont mean they will be with u till they are 7 yrs old. My little girl like i said is 2 now, and she is very smart, yes its abit to get her to stay in her bed, but u will never get back this precious times again, so just go with ur heart :)

Angela - posted on 08/14/2010

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We don't let our babies sleep with us, because we did not want them to still be sleeping with us when they are 7. Also, the risk of SIDS is higher if they sleep with you.

Jessica - posted on 08/14/2010

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I let my son sleep with me. I am a single mom who has troubles with the childs father and doing it all by yourself is hard. I never rolled on him or anything or even moved when I had him in bed with me. Like you every little move he made or noise he made I woke up. And he still sleeps in his crib now. He doesn't sleep through the night though. I am not sure if it is related or not but sometimes he just needs to know that his mom is still there for him and then he goes back to sleep.

Jennifer - posted on 08/14/2010

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my opinion absolutely not!! never have i put him in bed with me no matter how much easier it seems to be. and he is right you could roll on her. or she could suffocate in the blankets or the pillows on your bed.

Michelle - posted on 08/14/2010

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I am planning to co-sleep with my son when he arrives in January. There are so many benefits to it that I have come across. Yes I have read the risks and most of it is from drug users, drinkers and smokers. Which Is neither my husband or I. MY husband's brother ( who is 4) still co-sleeps and he is the most independent kid I have EVER known. I won't co-sleep that long, but atleast till my son is done breast-feeding so there can be a good transition, no more boob=big boy bed. I plan to breastfeed till atleast 1 if not till 2. They are only young once and we have to enjoy every moment we have with them. Even when my brother was an infant and when he got bigger he would sleep in my bed with me as well. He slpet so much better that way and I never once rolled onto him because it is the "mother instinct" I have with him and I know it will be even more so with my own child.

Ashleigh - posted on 08/14/2010

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I do the exact same thing as you- when I can, but not consistantly. I have an 7 month old baby boy, and have partially co-slept with him on and off since he was 4 weeks old. My main reasoning for this was he had (and still has) severe reflux and if his tummy was too sore from it, as soon as he was flat on his back he would scream and scream till he vomitted all his milk up. I got a special "u" shaped pillow from a baby shop, which proped him up so it didnt hurt him as much, but i did not trust letting him sleep with a pillow without out me being able to constantly check on him. and elevating the mattress didnt really work, because he wouldnt settle without me there. Since 9 weeks he has and is still on medication twice a day for this, so it is not so bad anymore, but occassionally he wont eat enough during the day and still need an early feed or wake up around 7am for a feed (and sometimes go back to sleep) so if i can get away with it, i will rest with him for an hour till he's ready to get up! I too believe its instinct. People have co-slept since the beginning of time, and were not exctinct! Good luck! :)

Janice - posted on 08/14/2010

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i dont think its wrong, but u see i did the same. Im a single mom though raising my little girl, and i had her with me alot. I love it and all, but it gets to the point now, where its hard to get her to go to bed at times, or in her own bed. I have been having lots of fun trying. She is 2 now. But it probably be different for u as its only in the morning. Also u wont roll on ur baby, i never did, u have the mother instinct thing, but enjoy the cuddle time while u can, u will treasure it later.



Also i was reading alot of what others put, IT DOES NOT MAKE U A BAD MOM IF U HAVE UR CHILD IN UR BED. I have my reasons, and i always new she was there, I had things said to me, that scared me, thats why she was with me. it dont make u a bad mom, and it really upsets me when ppl are negative about it, everyone has there own opinion yes and they are free to say what they want. BUT at the same time, say it where it dont seem u saying if u do ur a bad mom. A bad mom is abusing ur child, not loving ur child and want to be close to him or her. Also like i said before if u do co sleep, u will have problems after, my little one is doing better, it just takes time and alot of patience.



In the end do as u please, its ur little one, and no one has a right to judge u.

Sandra - posted on 08/13/2010

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Dont do it!! My daughter is 3 and has been spoiled wit sleeping with me since she was born and i wish i hadn't done it cuz Ive tried breakig her several times and it would get so bad that she wouldn't stop crying or go to sleep les she was next to me and most time i would feel so bad i would say ok sleep with mommy, and since it is just me and her I'd get so paronoid that someone would hurt her or something and have her sleep wit me, Again I regret it cuz Im still trying to break her from it and its soooooo hard.. Every now and then once in blue moon is ok, but it makes her feel more comfortable in your bed next to you then in her bed.. My daughter is 3 and trust me im still trying to break her and its hard. While young keep her in her bed or u will have so much trouble

Jacki - posted on 08/13/2010

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I have my hunny sleep with me but she only one month old and has been in bed with me since day one. And yes your child might get into that habbit but i mean if he wakes her then what are you supose to do right?,,, And noooooooooo mothers instint you will never roll onto her or anything! Guys are just not as conected as mothers are...

Lori - posted on 08/13/2010

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It's only in the morning. As long as you get time with your hubby at night then you should be good. Just be extra cautious because people don't really know how deep they actually sleep.

Also, tell him to be quiet in the morning :)

Amber - posted on 08/13/2010

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I think by the morning time you are not likely to sleep heavily enough to accidentally roll onto her. I do the same thing. It's also nice to nurse laying down to give yourself a few extra minutes of rest.

Samantha - posted on 08/13/2010

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If it is only in the morning I dont see the big deal. I do the same thing. When my fiance goes to work at 9pm i lay my daughter in bed with me and go to sleep until he gets home from work. I do not like sleeping alone but once he comes home we put her back in the crib. I also found out she will go to bed earlier if you lay down with her turn on a movie and give her a bottle. But once she is asleep she goes to her crib. He doesn't like it but its not like she sleeps with us all the time.

[deleted account]

I let my son sleep with me too. He is however starting to not be able to sleep through the whole night unless he is snuggling with me. I am trying to break the habit but it is hard cause i enjoy the cuddling time as well. Just be careful that it does not become an every single night thing.

Natasha - posted on 08/13/2010

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Ever since my son was born he sleeps in his crib sometimes but there are times that i am way to tired to put him in his crib so i jst lay him next to me and put my arm around him to make sure that he doesnt fall off the bed. i think that it is fine if you let your child sleep in bed with you as long as they sleep in their bed somtimes then they will know the difference. that is jst my point of view

Angela - posted on 08/13/2010

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I've been sleeping with my son since he was born and it's the safest and best thing for them. Mind you I'm a single mom so no man is vying for this time and space :)
It's safest because if your child is running a fever in the middle of the night, you'll know right away etc and no you won't roll over on her, you'd have to be either high or drunk for that to happen or unconscious. Babies are very light sleepers and you'll keep each other alert.

Tara - posted on 08/13/2010

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I slept with my son everynight till he was 3 months old, from there he went to a crib and now at a year I just have to put him in bed and he falls asleep. Don't get to worked up about all that you hear, just enjoy the time you have with your baby. As a mom you are such a light sleeper anyways that any noise they do make you wake right up. I really think he is too little to create any sort of habit right now. Just think just a few months ago he was in your belly, always with you and they still really like to be close with you. There is always time to switch them over, just do it early enough where he doesn't get used to it, I'd say 8-9 months ;)

Andrea - posted on 08/13/2010

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My first son is now 13 months and he still sleeps with us. Well he falls asleep in our bed and we have to hope we can get him in to his bed once's he's a sleep. But your right you wont roll over him. a mother is different than a father at least i think. I always know when my kid is beside me. But i now have a 6 week old and occasionaly he'll lyi with me but thats only when i nurse him.

Becky - posted on 08/12/2010

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As long as you are not intoxicated or do not have a sleep disorder of some kind, co-sleeping is not dangerous. Dr. Sears is a big advocate as are many other. My last baby was early and tiny so I bought a little bed to put in my bed- because she was so little- you can get them at baies r us, and other baby store.. but once they are bigger and you feel comfortable... I am not a doctor- just a mom who needed sleep. Personally, I've wanted them out as they got bigger... You could also get a co-sleeper that leans right up to the bed if you are more comfortable with that. Saying all that, you should put the baby on top of the blankets and away from any pillows and if they can roll over take extra precautions that they cannot fall off the bed....

[deleted account]

i do the same thing! i haven't rolled on my little guy yet.we take a cat nap in the morning from 6am - 7am and I like it.

Erika - posted on 08/12/2010

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my son is 8 weeks old. He WILL NOT sleep in his crib or bassinet. I have tried repeatedly. I dont see anything wrong with it as long as you're being safe. Dont do it if you're overly tired. I dont think she will want to sleep with you forever. They all grow out of it eventually. I plan to enjoy him cuddling with me while hes still little an will. =) Enjoy your baby!

Christian - posted on 08/12/2010

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I was against co sleeping for the first few months with my son and will be with the next one as well.. but you get to your breaking point. If you don't get the proper rest you need, how are you expected to take care of a baby? I obviously caved and we eventually had our son in bed with us at night so we could rest. He is now 2 years old and still in our bed, which I don't like anymore, but 10 years from now I will probably miss these years. Get the cuddle time in while you can!

Rebecca - posted on 08/12/2010

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I swear u wouldnt let my little girl sleep with me. but she hated her crib so i let her sleep wit me from the start and she sleeps much better. but i dont have someone in bed with us because before she was born my husband was killed. i dont know if i would have let her if he was alive. she is now 11 months and she very much loves to be with mommy. we r working on her sleeping by herself at naps but its taking time. when i was a kid i slept with my mom and i turned out fine. it has to be what works best for you both.

Joanna - posted on 08/12/2010

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we did it with our 1st son as he was quite a difficult baby and unsettled. he then refused to go ijn his cot full stop and was with us til he was 2 and a bit. now hes in his own bed i miss snuggling up to him but its better for him. like someone said further up i think women have a natural instinct that makes them wake up every little noise and movement. we sais we wouldnt put our 2nd son in our bed, but as hes been a bit poorly lately we put him in after his 1st feed and he settles straight away. do what you feel is right! i dont see any harm whatsoever x

Daniella - posted on 08/12/2010

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she is your child so it is your choice just be careful when she gets older my son is almost 2 and gets in my bed every night in the early hours so just be wary good luck

Vahinemoea - posted on 08/12/2010

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my baby is ten months old and has been sleeping with me since she was a very young age just because i love sleeping with her and its easier to tend to her if shes in my bed. im a light sleeper so every move she makes i wake up and i am a non smoker i think the only downside about my baby sleeping with me is that she has gotten used to be always being there so its hard for her to sleep on her own and she has become very clingy but like i said i love sleeping with my baby shes my everything.

Irene - posted on 08/11/2010

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My daughter is 4 months & she still sleeps with me!

When Alannah was born we tried the Summer Infant sleep positioner with heartbeat & she only lasted most 30min because she would make the slightest move & wake herself up & would start crying. The same happened in her bassinett which we rarely used. The only way I could get her to sleep was having her sleep in my arms. As soon as she turned 3 months I knew I needed to wean her from sleeping in my arms because she was getting heavier & I would wake up & barely have any feeling in my arms!

I came across MUNCHKIN COOL FLOW BACK SLEEP POSITIONER from Target.com

It had a high rating so I decided to try it too!
I love it! It comes in two pieces that connect with velcro which you can adjust it if your little ones like to sleep on their side or back! The wedges are vented too so your baby isn't so sweaty while sleeping!

I put her in it right away (on her side which she prefers) & she slept the whole night since! I love this product because I don't have to worry about the chance of rolling over on Alannah! Also my baby is a wiggle worm & hasn't wiggled out of it & feels secure in it!

Tyrae - posted on 08/11/2010

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Co-sleeping is something that has been happening for centuries between parents and their babies. Only in the last 100-150 years has this changed. Just like the western civilization thought that breast feeding was horrible they made out co-sleeping to be a horrible thing to do too. It's natural, it not only allows for your baby and you to get a better sleep, especially if you are b/fing because you can both partially wake up do it and fall back asleep, but you can keep a close eye on your lil one and they get a great sleep from the sound of your heart beat. If you are extremely worried about rolling over on your baby or your partner doing that, they do have little mini beds that you can put your baby in between your pillows that has sides on it that creates a barrier around the baby and lets them still be within arms reach if anything happens.

Mandy - posted on 08/11/2010

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I did the same thing, but do not let it keep going on once she starts to finally sleep on her own. because if you keep doing it she will want to sleep in your bed all the time and when they get older it is so much harder to get them to sleep in their own bed

Kyla - posted on 08/11/2010

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I started with just the last hour in the morning before we needed to get up when my son started waking up around 5 when he was about the same age, and now its turned into a struggle every night just trying to get him to sleep in his own bed (which he won't anymore) and he will be 1 next week. Its really up to you, but I would not recommend making it into a habit.. I am dying for a night just my husband and I

Varda - posted on 08/11/2010

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As long as it isn't the full night it's fine, it is same as afternoon sleep. I wouldn't be worry from this (-:

Angie - posted on 08/11/2010

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I do that every so often as well. There is absolutely nothing wrong with it.

[deleted account]

theres not much worry about a mother rolling over onto her baby when they're sleeping, as long as you arent under the iunfluence of drugs or alcohol (obviously)... so i wouldnt listen to your boyfriend, and keep doing what makes you guys happy and sane. and plus, snuggle time is always great and its also bonding time! i love sleeping with my little girl, except when she kicks me in the face lol, but shes a little bigger, almost 14 months.

Kelly - posted on 08/11/2010

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yes i do but it isn't a good idea because they get attached to it and then will want to sleep with you all the time even when they grow up

Natalie - posted on 08/11/2010

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I do a very similar thing, after my very early morning feed if bubs won't settle, I bring her into bed with me. It's nice to have a snuggle while they are still so little and there's no solid evidence to prove that it's habit forming. I'm with you, you won't squash her because when they move you wake us. If she sleeps in her bed at other times of the day why feel guilty about having some mum and bub time early in the morning???

Aicha - posted on 08/10/2010

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I let my daughter sleep with me it is 100% easier having her in my bed to nurse her and comfort her if she wake at night

Kimberly - posted on 08/10/2010

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your body has a natural awareness of your surroundings while you sleep. That's how you can move around without falling off the bed. So unless you are drunk, drugged, extremely overly exhuasted, or extremely overweight you are not going to roll over onto your baby. Children don't completely aquire this until they are older so it is dangerous for younger children to sleep with an infant. My baby is 10 months and co-slept with me until he was 7 months and I had no problem transitioning him to his crib. I still put him in bed with me when my husband gone once in a while and there is still no problem with him sleeping in his crib. There is nothing wrong with having them in the bed with you while they are little as long as you are comfortable with it. It was a wonderful experience for me and made nursing in the early months much easier though the night.

Sarh - posted on 08/10/2010

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charlina... are you saying that I do not have a close bond w/my children? I have a very close bond w/them. It takes me at least an hour to fall asleep when he is in his crib. Some nights I just can't fall asleep and I end up bringing him into our room and putting him in his bouncer to sleep (where he is comfy, other wise he will tell me!), then he is at my bed side. There is no reason for a child to be in a bed w/an adult. Also, babies wont be harmed in their crib if it is just them w/out pillows, blankets, etc in there with them.

Charlina - posted on 08/10/2010

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responding to Sarh. You may not understand unless you have a certain bond with your baby. some people can easily put there baby in a crib, with bumber cushions and sleep all night. When I bonded with my son when he was in the womb, it was hard for me to place him so far away from me. they tell you what can happen, but those same things happen in a crib and you may not notice anything until you decide to wake up. With most of us, once you become a mother, you sleep with one eye open. I never accidently rolled over on my son. The most I've done was woke up saying "get away" because I was dreaming that his dad was trying to get a late night booty call, but my son actually just latched himself on and was breastfeeding. lol. I know i'm not a bad mom or wouldnt dare put my child at risk for anything.

Charlina - posted on 08/10/2010

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My doctor drilled me about having my son sleep with me, saying that I can roll on him, SIDS, etc. He has slept with me since the day he was born. He was in the hospital bed with me. When I got home, I tried putting him in his crib but i woke up from a dream that he was caught in between the bars. He is now 13 months and almost every night wakes up in his crib crying and his dad brings him in our bed or stays up with him until he goes back to sleep. Its hard to break that routine. Your baby may end up expecting to wake up next to you. The baby that I'm pregnant with now, I will keep in a basinet next to the bed. Just try to break the habit before your baby gets use to it.

Sarh - posted on 08/10/2010

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I just don't see how parents could take that big of a risk when there are other ways to bond w/your child. Taking this risk is horrible. Your child is something that you can never get back if you were to roll on them, the pillow could cover their face, the blanket could, your arm could be around them and be too heavy on their body... there are so many ways for what should be your most precious gift to be hurt and even die. It's just not worth it! You want bonding time? Nurse your child! Talk w/them while they are awake, play w/them. Isn't a mother's largest responsibility to keep her child safe at any cost!? Here in the US babies are supposed to be placed in their own bed weather it is a crib or bassinet w/out pillows and blankets because those things could cover babies face and then obviously baby suffocates to death. Not sure where these mothers are in the world that they sleep w/their babies, but here in the US they have co-sleeper pack and plays.. these are pack n plays that have a higher up "bed" for baby, in which you can see baby and baby can see you. The baby is at your bed level and can be right against your bed.
http://www.google.com/images?hl=en&q=arm...

here is a link to pictures of arm's reach co-sleepers, much safer and still able to bond!

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