Do you let your baby sleep with you?

Ashley - posted on 08/09/2010 ( 214 moms have responded )

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My boyfriend leaves kinda early for work, and when he does, he wakes my daughter up(almost 3 moths old) and when he leaves I bring her in bed with me and snuggle with her and go back to bed. Is this ok? My boyfriend dosent like how I do it, he's worried that Im going to roll over on her or something. I know I wont because every little move or sound she makes I wake up. He's also worried that she's going to get into the habit of wanting to sleep in our bed. But i don't think I should worry if I only do it in the morning, should I?

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Mah - posted on 08/10/2010

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Yes, Jibran sleeps with me. Totally worth the bonding and no noone rolls on her!

[deleted account]

I'm against co-sleeping as well. I have a friend who's cousin rolled on his baby when he was asleep and the baby died. One of the coroners here in New Zealand recently put out a recommendation to not cosleep. The ease and comfort just isn't worth the risk in my opinion. It's like eating possible listeria risk food when pregnant. It's not likely, but why risk it?

Sarh - posted on 08/10/2010

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I would never have my child sleep in bed with me not even for 30 mins! You never truly know how tired you are... what if you were to fall into a deep sleep and not hear or feel her and accidentally hurt her?! Your boyfriend is absolutely correct! Honey, please don't here in WI there was a story of a 3 month old and a 3 yr old sleeping on a couch together and the baby died even though he was only sleeping w/a 3yr old! Also, she will get used to "napping" w/you ever morning. Please don't do this!!! I beat myself up every time I doze off while doing morning feeds w/my son even though I wake up immediately when he makes a noise or moves.

Caroline - posted on 08/09/2010

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it ok to let your baby sleeps with you all three of my girls sleep with me when they were babies and they were ok in that way you draw a closer bond its like breastfeeding bonding with your child letting them know that you loves them

Terra - posted on 08/09/2010

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I slept with my daughter until she was 2 (she is 4 and sleeps just fine in her own bed now by the way) and my 8 month old son has slept in out bed since day one. I love it and wouldn't have it any other way.

You should look into getting an arms reach co-sleeper. It is something you can attach to the side of your bed for the baby to sleep in so they are close enough to touch but aren't actually in your bed. It is really easy to bring them into bed with your to nurse or snuggle but you also have the "safety net" in knowing that they have their own space and are safe from rolling off the bed. If you boyfriend realizes that you are taking every precaution to bed share safely then maybe he'll be more comfortable with it.

Trying googling "Family Bed" for some great and encouraging co-sleeping information. It is NOT dangerous when done safely and is actually practiced as normal in more countries then not around the world.

Britni - posted on 08/09/2010

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I slept with my daughter off and on and still do, I try not to though but my husband leaves early and sometimes i even drive him to work but I dont see a problem with sleeping with them, BUT ALWAYS put her to bed at night in her bed, she needs to learn that she goes night night in her bed, and that way you still get along time with daddy, you know because the older she gets the more and more attached she will get to you in that way and not no any better and then you guys cant get mad at anyone else but yourself, because it is a pattern to her and she is used to it. But i love snuggling my daughter especially at night when she is sleeping i want to scoop her up and squeeze her to death lol

Brandy - posted on 08/09/2010

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With my daughter, I would put her down in her crib (which was in our room) at the beginning of the night, then when she woke up to feed, she would go in our bed after she finished. We did this until she was 6 months old, then moved her crib to her own room and she would still wake up at about 4 am for a feeding and then come to our bed. When she was 9 months old, she started sleeping through the night and stayed in her own room. When she was 13 months, we moved to a new house and she started getting her 1 year molars and eye teeth. She had a hard time with the teething, wasn't used to her new room and was up and in pain alot in the night. I was pregnant and fatigued as it was, so I started sleeping with her in the bed again. She finished her teething after a few months and moved back into her own room without problem or using the "cry it out" method before our son came. Our son is 6 months old and still sleeps in our bed most of the time and I don't see a problem with it.

P.S. More crib sleeping babies die of SIDS than bedshare babies. Why do you think it's nicknamed 'crib death'. If it makes you uncomfortable or nervous or you are on medication that changes your sleeping patterns, don't do it but otherwise, I don't see the problem.

Sarah - posted on 08/09/2010

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I've never really agreed with the whole co-sleeping thing, so my son has pretty much slept in his own crib from day one. He started sleeping through the night from a young age, but then all of a sudden starting waking up again when he was around 8 months old (he's 10 1/2 months now). So, I started bringing him in bed with my husband and me, which is probably not a good habit to get into since he's an older baby. I'm going to try and break him of the habit before it's too late lol.

[deleted account]

Well he is right that she will get used to sleeping in the bed with you, especially as she gets older and her memory gets better, but most likely you wont' roll onto her if you are sensitive about her every sound/move. also, why doesn't your husband just not wake her up in the morning?

[deleted account]

I don't agree with co-sleeping. It is not only dangerous but it is something that becomes a habit, generally for the mother not the baby. At some point this will become a habit, only a bad habit if you see it that way. We personally didn't want our son sleeping in our bed not only for safety reasons but because it's called a marital bed for a reason.

Ultimately it is a decision you have to make between yous.

Amanda - posted on 08/09/2010

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i slept with my son in my bed for the first 3 months because i was too scared to let him sleep in his crib by himself, i felt like he would stop breathing or something, so he slept with me, and now he is 11 months almost, and i have to let him sleep in my bed every time i put him to sleep, then transfer him to his crib after he is asleep, they do get used to it because they fall asleep next to you and expect you to always do that. it is nice to cuddle with them when they are little, but i have twins on the way and i gotta break leo of the sleeping with me thing, its tiring.

Jenni - posted on 08/09/2010

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Before i had my first, i swore i wouldn't co-sleep b/c of the risks i've read about and heard from doctors and nurses. But with a mix of being a clueless new mom and having an infant that screamed as soon as i laid him in his cot (or shortly after). I was so exhausted when i took him to bed to nurse i'd wind up falling asleep with him in bed. It worked so well in allowing both of us to get our zzz's that i continued it until he was 4 months. My SO didn't like it either and was worried one of us would roll over onto him. It didn't happen but it still worried me that it could have happened. I wouldn't have been worried if it was just me in the bed. I'm a light sleeper and was always aware of where he was next to me. Think it may be a natural instinct mothers have.
However, my second is a great sleeper there was the odd time i fell asleep while nursing her in bed in the first 6 weeks. Her night feeds now are only 15 minutes and i'm not as tired as i was in the beginning so it never happens now.

[deleted account]

She is only little once and you need the sleep too. I do the same with my 3 month old son. My husband thinks the same thing.Enjoy your quiet time while you can.

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