Intercourse is still painful! Please HELP! x

Mary - posted on 03/22/2009

Honey I brought this up in another forum and you wouldn't beleive the respons I got.  My sone is almost 8 months old and I STILL find it painful....not really bad but enough to make me dissintersted in sex.  But latley things have been a little better because we take it very slow at first and use Lubrication....I find going slow untill I am adjusted helps alot.  I had a 3rd degree cut and I was very sore down there for a while even though the doctor told me I healed perfectly.  The doctor also told me the first time  would prob be a little painful and I think because it was I also tense up somewhat expecting the pain.

So my advise is to take it slow try not to tense up and use some lubrication and don't get frustrated if it takes a little while....Things will eventualy get back to normal.  The things we go through eh!!  LOL

Terri - posted on 03/21/2009

if you are nursing that could contribute to it also. 

Jodie - posted on 03/20/2009

Thanks everyone for replying, you've all been a great help with my issue, i will talk to my doctor about this :) x-x-x

Cynthia - posted on 03/20/2009

HI Jodie. I had two no problem natural childbirths. The reason I share this is not to toot my horn but to say I still didn`t feel comfortable having sex until well after each of my sons turned three months. So the fact that you went through mini surgery should give you an idea to give yourself some breathing room. Let your body heal...at least you are young you should heal somewhat faster. But as you now know along with all mothers childbirth is a crazy painful ride.



However, the pain you feel each time you have sex should be diminishing. not getting worse. you could have issues with the muscles healing properly. Talk to your doctor. I remember HATING with a passion talking to my family doctor at that age about anything.The previous advice though is good, your doctor has seen this before and knows what is ok and what is not. Go in there with the your symptoms written down if that helps. be very detailed in how and where and if the doctor ( they shouldn`t but you never know) really doesn`t seem to listen be insistent of how truly painful it is. You could ask to see a gynacologist if your doctor isn`t helpful.



If you have a friend who`s had kids see if they would be willing to go with you. Moral supprt helps a lot. Good luck and take care.

Alison - posted on 03/19/2009

Hi Jodie!
I am so sorry you are going through this because I know it SUCKS! I had a 2nd degree tear after 3 hours of pushing (lots of trauma down there anyway with that)...and my son is a little over 4 months old now and intercourse still is a no-go for me. For me, it doesn't seem to be an issue of lubrication...it just feels like a really really really REALLY sharp pain. I've heard that it's probably scar tissue and that it can take awhile to heal, so we're just kinda waiting right now until I'm feeling better. It does take a long time to heal for some people.

Now I HAVE heard from many women that it'll actually stop hurting quicker in the long run if you go ahead and proceed with intercourse rather than waiting. But it just depends on your pain tolerance.

Tiffany - posted on 03/19/2009

I had pain with intercourse for a while after my first child. Lubrication was a big part of the problem. I'm not kidding...I talked to my Ob about it and he said to get a good KY massage oil and have a glass of wine so that I wasn't tense about it possibly hurting. I did not get to take his advice but we were having marital problems at the time. (divorced since then.) I did have a friend that actually had to go to physical therapy because her muscle tone didn't return to the right tension. Don't be afraid to ask your doctor because he will have an idea of your tone........there is no way you are their first patient to have this problem. That's how I approach all discussions with a doctor....they have been practicing for a while and I am certainly not the odd man out. Good luck and remember that it takes over a year for your body to return to any semblance of normal.

Susan - posted on 03/19/2009

Hi Jodie, My son is 13 mths old and i had a 3 degree tear when gave birth and was very sore around the scarred area after sex for a long time.But thankfully is no longer sore,so i'm sure given a little more time things should settle down.xx

Jodie - posted on 03/19/2009

Thanks 4 replying. It hurts all over n then is reali sore 4 a couple of hrs afterwards, it's healed up now it only takes bout 6 wks 2 heal. Thanks again, Jodie x-x-x

Jennifer - posted on 03/19/2009

Where is it painful? Is it at the opisiotomoy incision site? I haven't had one but I'm sure that could take quite a long time to heal completely and be rid of comfort. If it hurts inside closer to your cervix taking it slower may help. My cervix was so sensitive during my entire last pregnancy that poor hubby hardly got any. It's mostly back to normal now though. I know it's a bit embarassing at first, but you shoulk talk to your OB or midwife, whomever delivered your girl since they are familiar with your situation.