nap time horror

Christine - posted on 01/13/2009 ( 14 moms have responded )

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Hi, my seven month old has a bit of a problem with naps. If i hold him he will stay asleep but the minute i go to put him down

he wakes up and starts screaming. He used to get held a lot but he started to expect that all the time and now he will not go

to sleep unless you hold him. He can be sleeping for 10 minutes and i

go to put him in his crib and he wakes up and will I cannot take it, the crying breaks my heart. Any suggestions on what to do?? If i held him all the time while he sleeps i do not get anything done. His nap time is my housework time.

not go back to sleep.My husband and i have tried to let him cry it out but he will cry for sometimes an hour before he gives up.

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14 Comments

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Jen - posted on 01/19/2009

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Quoting Michelle:


I've also read that it's best when you transition them down to the crib, to put their bottoms down first, then head. They have a higher chance of staying asleep that way.



 






That's a great tip -- thank you!



I'm also struggling with getting my five month old to nap.  It seems that my older daughter learned it faster than this one -- I'm trying to perservere.  It's definitely hard to hear them cry, but I do believe that they have to learn this skill sometime -- now or when they can crawl out of their crib or worse yet -- the bed!



 As far as your friend/family sabotaging your efforts, well... I know it's hard, but you know what's best for your baby.  Stay firm and they should respect you for it.  I think some people w/out kids or who haven't had a baby in a while forget how difficult it is to go through this... they don't mean to make it harder, they just don't realize what work we're having to go through!



Best wishes!! : )

Tracey - posted on 01/18/2009

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Maybe you can try wearing him. I wear my 6 month old on my back when she doesn't want to stay asleep on her own and I have stuff to do in the house. It is a lifesaver. My hands are free and she's close. I wear my daughter in a mei tai carrier.

Michelle - posted on 01/17/2009

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Sometimes my seventh month old does the same thing...is your baby teething? If so, have you tried the teething tablets? Maybe he just needs some extra mommy time? I know it's frustrating...I think most "sleep experts" would tell you you have to let him cry. Have you tried the comfort him, leave him in the crib, go back in 10 minutes, then 15, then 20? I've also read that it's best when you transition them down to the crib, to put their bottoms down first, then head. They have a higher chance of staying asleep that way.



 



Good luck!

Laura - posted on 01/17/2009

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Try swaddling him. I have just stopped swaddling my eight month old. He wouldn't really sleep on his own very well. At 4 months I started swaddling him and now he takes great naps. The down side in your situation is that a seven month old is very aware of the surroundings. He is going to protest when you put him down because he knows where he is being put. I would try swaddling him, rocking until drowsy then the crib for nap. As he begins to get the cue that this means nap time, then he will get better at napping. There will be crying, but give him 3 days or so and it should improve. Nap cues are a huge part of getting your baby to nap. Once you get him to nap, then you can start omitting a step. You can swaddle then put down in the crib. Then you can remove the swaddle. It worked for us!

Amanda - posted on 01/17/2009

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For us, going in his room at increasing intervals didn't work. Every time I went it it was like the crying started all over again, full force. Some babies are calmed by a tummy rub. I guess it is just what works for your baby.

Terleeah - posted on 01/17/2009

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Sorry, just in reply to your reply, another things that is hard, you need to det the rules being his mum. If it's making it to hard which it sounds like it is, you need to ask your family member to work with you on fixing this problem and let them know that by them holding him is makig things worse. Best of luck!

Terleeah - posted on 01/17/2009

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Hi Christine,

Hope you are having better luck since you posted this! Have you heard of controlled crying? I know it sounds really harsh and it does break your heart but as a mum and a childcare worker, I can assure you it really does work. Try and leave him for say 15minutes, the next time 20, the next 25etc. Just increase the time little by little and only go in if he is really working himself up, not just because it's breaking your heart. I know it sounds harsh but I had to do it with my lil man when he was about 4 1/2 months, he was just too reliant on me carrying him and I didn;t even realise I was doing it because I was at home and I was there to tend to him (pick him up!) when he got upset! He is now nearly 9months and when he is due for a sleep, I feed him, give him a burp, check his nappy and put him down at the same time everyday. He cries for about 2-10minutes depending on how tired he is and puts himself to sleep. Children have great little lungs and can cry for a LONG time! Remember he knows in his mind that if he cries he will be picked up. I do know how hard it is but it really does work. Let me know how you go. Good luck!

Christine - posted on 01/16/2009

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Thank you all for the advice so far.  We have tried putting him in a swing when he gets drowsy and that puts him to sleep but we still cannot set him down on the floor or anything to sleep on his own.  We were doing hte crying it out thing and it seemed that we were getting somewhere but a family member loves to hold him while he sleeps and what we had accomplished got shot to heck.  Any suggestions on this?This is our first child so we have a lot of questions. 

Amanda - posted on 01/16/2009

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What helped us a lot was to establish a familiar routine. Do the same series of things every time you put your baby down, at as closely to the same time of day as possible. Even for naps during the day. For example we go through changing a diaper/clothes, closing the blinds, feeding, turning on lullabys, rocking for one lullaby and then I put him in the crib awake, but drowsy. And I usually get a smile when I do it!
Just a few months ago my baby was sleeping in the bed with us, and never napping unless he happened to fall asleep in the car seat. Its not like I always had a great sleeper. If my little one wakes during the night I dont go in and he usually only cries for a few minutes. I can see him on the video monitor, I know he is ok.
The best advice I got about crying it out is that it gets shorter each time. This proved to be true.

Amy - posted on 01/16/2009

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Yes, i myself am going to start trying the cry it out method. My baby is 10 1/2 months old and won't sleep through the night. He still wakes up, anywhere from 3 times to 6 times a night. I am working full time and need my sleep, so am going to try this. I really hope it works. It would definitely makes things easier around here!

Tabitha - posted on 01/16/2009

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letting him cry it out is the best thing you can do for him.. it will be hard on you to hear him .. but you need to remind yourself that he iis fed. clean and safe.. he is just mad that he is being put down..  also teaching him to sleep on his own is very important if you dont break this habit soon it will last untill you do . weather it be 2 weeks from now or 2 years from no it will still be a problem...  ...



what i suggest is to lay him down dosy.. and let him figure out that it is nap time .. put him down and leave the room. if he fusses.. leave him alone for 2 minutes then go calm him down .. then repeat this cycle  but adding 2 minutes everytime you leave him alone .... only go into the room to calm him down .. if he isnt making any noise dont go in the room. ..



 



it might take 2 or 3 weeks of this but eventually it will work!!

Kerrie - posted on 01/16/2009

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We had to do the same thing with our son. We had to just let him cry it out. The first time he cried for almost 2 hours. I went in every 10 mins or so to reassure him that he wasnt abandoned. And then let him cry for a bit and went back in. It was sooooo hard to do. I wanted to cry. Then next day he cried for an hour. Every day became less and less. It gets easier you just gotta stick with it

Amy - posted on 01/14/2009

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Have u tried laying him on his belly instead of his back? I know that u r supposed to lay them on their back b/c of SIDS, but my baby did the exact same thing. He would sleep peacefully on me if I held him, but as soon as I laid him in his crib, he would start crying and wouldn't stop. I soon figured out that if I laid him on his belly, them he would wake up a little bit, but settle himself back to sleep. I think your baby is way past the point of worrying about SIDS, but if you are worried about that, then do what you think is best. My baby is 10 1/2 months old and that is the only way he will stay asleep. Good luck.

Marianna - posted on 01/14/2009

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Have you tried putting him in the crib awake but drowsy?  I know that works best for my 7 month old.  He may fuss 15 minutes some days and some days not at all, but he puts himself to sleep.  One other thing- I highly recommend the book Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child.  I learned so much from the book.  One thing I am doing with my 7 month old baby that I didn't do with my 2 1/2 year old is the 9AM and 1PM nap schedule talked about in this book.  It also talks a lot about bedtime and how an overly tired baby has a hard time sleeping.   You can get it used on eBay or Amazon if you don't want to pay full price.  I hope it gets better!

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