Nat - posted on 01/29/2010 ( 1 mom has responded )
I know this is a touchy subject for alot of people and the last thing I want to do is upset anybody or fill any expecting mothers with ill feelings. I do not have children myself have been surrounded by them my whole life and been very instumental in the upbringing of nieces and nephews.
My interest in the subject matter is to try and gain a better understanding of my mothers upbringing and understand some of the horrific feelings my grandmother must have experienced.
PLEASE NOTE my mother was born in 1954 and though post natal depression had started to be recognised in the 50's it was not really talked about as its own stigmas and connotations were attached to it. Also grief councilling for losing a child was basically - Have another child as soon as possible! There was no support network.
My mother was the resented child after (what would have been) her brother died in a car accident while playing. I think the problem for my grandmother was that my mother was not the boy that she lost and could not face being around her new child and subsequently made the childs life a misery until she was taken into care and then sent to boarding school.
My mother does not resent my grandmother (now passed on) but is keen to gain some understanding of what my grandmother must have been feeling and the pain she was going through to resent a child so much.
My grandmother had 2 more children after my mother and had no resentment for them. Is this normal or common?
I am looking for any recomendations of literature on the effects of unrecognised PND in the 50's or if anybody could point me in the direction of anything else I should look into. I am also very interested in finding out if anybody has had any experiences with this.
Thanks for reading,