When did your life go back to normal?

Renee - posted on 05/07/2010 ( 20 moms have responded )




I don't mean to the way it was before, but for example, when did you start showering regularly, and for more than two minutes at a time? When did you manage to squeeze in some exercise? Or read a newspaper? Am I destined to be smelly, fat, lonely and ill-informed for the next decade????


Christina - posted on 05/25/2010




Honey, we've all been there!! I agree with some of the other Moms that 6 months is a turning point. Suddenly this infant that needed your attention every waking (and we know I mean WAKING, cause there's lots of that...) second of the day becomes his or her own little person. Now they can play and entertain themselves a little. Now they actually begin to stop wanting to be held all day and like a bit of independence. Also, they sleep more (Yay!!!), maybe even for 12 hours straight (Doesn't that sound like Heaven!). Plus, your baby will be showing his or her personality more, which is a fun time. You'll know your baby well by then, and will know what to expect. Of course, I have a 7, 5, and 2 year old and haven't had an uninterrupted bathroom break in 7 years. I think that's the worst part of parenting. Showers are like prison showers - you never know who's going to walk in. It's lovely when your daughter walks in as you're getting out of the shower and asks you "Mommy, when are my boobies going to be down like yours?" Down...not the adjective I want to be used when describing my breasts. LOL!
Anyhow, it does get better! Try not to feel too bad, like I said, every mother has been there. Any that say they haven't are in denial, or so sleep deprived they just don't remember...:)

Rachel - posted on 06/02/2010




I think it was around 5-6months when I started getting to shower again. I would take Emily into the bathroom with me and she would play on the floor. Now at 11 months, I either shower while she's napping or after her dad gets home from work. In the last few months I've actually managed to finish 2 or 3 novels during naptimes. I know things had gotten pretty bad for a while (from about 4months to 7 months). I was suffering from postpartum depression. I couldn't do anything, I was always irritated and angry. I started working only saturday and sundays back in march and that really helped. Until recently I was dealing with issues with my mother on top of the depression. Looking back on all that now, when I have a frustrating day nothing is as bad I felt then, and I've finally started to realize that things are only going to get better from here on.

[deleted account]

Ha,Ha normal it never gets back there. Exercise take the kiddo out for walks in the stroller or if you run , run behind the stroller. Also gyms have kids centers at the locations. Get up before your baby and take a shower is it just you or you have someone there to help you or take the baby in with you and take a shower together. I am a single momma I thought I would never get to bathe. I take my shower in the evenings after he is down for the night. Have a routine babys will follow besides they like a route.

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Elfrieda - posted on 01/17/2013




For my first who was colicky and carried on being a terrible sleeper, it took until 10 months when he started sleeping better to feel like maybe my life wasn't over, and by the time he was 2 life was easy. Not the same as before, of course, but I liked it, it was a fun life. Watching our son learn things and become more and more his own personality is terribly rewarding and funny. Our toddler was easy-going, liked going places with us and helping do whatever I was doing, so the only real constraints were we had to be home from 1-4 pm for his nap, and back at least by 8pm for his bedtime. I really missed playing board games, watching movies, going away for the weekend with friends, etc. But there were other enjoyable things that took their place.

Now I have a baby again (2 months old) and things are just starting to seem like they might come back to a point of sanity, so that's much faster than with my first. I think it's a mixture of easier baby, more experienced mom, and lower social expectations, ie we don't go out much anyway, so there's not much to miss. .

Jenny - posted on 01/17/2013




Are you for real? I do hope that you have since found time to have a wash.

Heather - posted on 06/08/2010




It took about 4 months to get a routine that worked for me, my husband, and Grace. We had some rough moments. I think back and there were days that went by before I realized I needed to shower. I felt like I was wearing the same clothes every day.

One day, my husband watch the baby so I could go out for some me time - it was just for an hour. I went to the mall and bought a few new outfits; anything that didn't look like maternity clothes. I also had a medi/pedi. When I got home I felt refreshed and relaxed.

You will figure out a routine that works for you and your family, but make sure you ask for help and get some time for yourself. You deserve it!!!!

Amanda - posted on 05/26/2010




I feel pretty lucky. My life went back to normal pretty quick. I was always able to shower every day, sleep through the night, read, spend a little time exercising. My almost 4 month old is a very good baby boy. I was going out everyday after i got home. I did however spend the first couple days at home just relaxing.

Kemi-Alicia - posted on 05/23/2010




Lol, it all takes time to get back there but it will happen.

I started showering while my baby sometimes slept, i'd take the rocker with me to the bathroom. Or if i missed having one in the morning, i'd wait till my husband got home to help us in and out of the bath; i'd get in, he'd pass me the baby and when we were done, i'd pass the baby back to him to dress her while i got dressed. Don't try it on your own.

As for exercise, i joined mom and baby yoga and pilates classes, teamed up with other new moms and went for walks, took mom and baby swim classes etc.

Join Meetup.com and find moms and events in your area, it's a great way to meet new people.

The key to doing anything while at home is to do it while your baby sleeps...

It took me 2 months to feel comfortable enough to leave the house without my husband. When i did, it was wonderful. I was breast feeding so i found it easy. We bought the baby Ergo carrier, so all i had to do was pack diapers, wipes and I was ready to go.

Do it all at you own pace, it can be overwhelming.

Kathy - posted on 05/09/2010




Normal?? Not yet, but she's only 7 months... I shower when she's sleeping or after the hubby's home from work. My brothers staying with us so if he's on a day off he'll play with her or sit while she sleeps while I have a shower. Exercise... take the baby for walks, put her/him in the stroller and go, cardio can be the best for you, and the best for burning fat (although I can't talk I don't do it too often myself) When the baby gets older you'll get lots just keeping up with them. Newspapers I don't do, but I watch the news at night and in the morning, I check stuff on the internet when she's playing or napping.... thats normal at least for now. I'm loving every minute of it, if I don't get a shower one day oh well I have a baby as a reason... theres some days where if I don't have anything to do me and baby hang out in jammies all day. I'm gonna miss that when I go back to work though!!

Amanda - posted on 05/09/2010




i have a 13 yr old, 11 yr old, and 21 month old (with #4 on the way). i'm still waiting for "normal", but i'm kinda happy with the abnormal. :)

Jeanny - posted on 05/09/2010




Hi Renee,

This is so funny. I used to feel the same way. I am finally starting to feel a bit more "normal" now that my son is almost 7 months old. As for shower time, he goes either into his crib for a nap and I watch him on the monitor or I bring him along in his bouncy chair and he gets to watch the "mommy show" from the door. If he starts to cry I can see him on the monitor or from the door. If he is just being fussy and bored and not in any immediate danger from a random toy attack he can hang on a bit til I'm done. Letting him cry a bit has been the hardest part for me to learn because I never want him to cry and be sad but honestly, I have learned that sometimes they cry just because they want to, not because they are in any particular danger, need or want. As for being informed I just sit on the floor with my laptop on the coffee table and get my news online. It's great because I get to be close to the baby where he is doing his own thing but I am getting "informed" at the same time. And sometimes he even likes to get in on the action and sits long enough on my lap to see what the "news" for the day is. Lastly, as for the exercise, we relocated our treadmill to the living room where the baby plays and the TV is located. This way mommy can watch baby play, exercise and catch up on Grey's Anatomy at the same time. It does take time but once you get into a routine life gets easier and "normal" will be that much closer. Hope this helps! Oh, and Happy Mothers Day!!!!

Amy - posted on 05/07/2010




hahahaha. i'm laughing w/ u not at you. i'm in the same boat. my oldest is 3 and my youngest is 16 months.i haven't had a hot meal or regular shower (alone) pottied alone, or dressed alone yet. lol we travel around the house as a pack. and now the dog got in on the action. i've just adjusted what "normal" life is. i listen to the news on the radio or tv now and we use potty time as teaching time for my youngest. we fold laundry together, teaching the oldest how to do towels and the youngest just plays in the basket. we take care of the animals and learn responsibility. and my showers are either with someone or on the fly. the rare time i get to shower is when hubby has the kids but mostly after they've gone to sleep or before they wake up. then again, i am still tethered to a monitor. we exercise together by taking walks and running around the park or back yard. the way i figure it, one say soon i will miss all of this when i go back to my "old life" of having time to myself. lol.

Jennifer - posted on 05/07/2010




I have three kids. After having kids things change. You just have to work out a routine. It is hard at first, things change all the time as the child or children get older, so your life changes. Being a mom is great but your life will never be just your life anymore.

Valerie - posted on 05/07/2010




hopefully not, lol...but you sure summed up my memories of new baby times...it sounds like you need a little relief once in a while....do you have a partner, good friend, mom's helper you could call once a week at least? perhaps join a local mom's support group and then you can help each other keep your sanity an d hygiene! all the best

Candice - posted on 05/07/2010




hahahaha! i can't remember exactly when, but i think it was around the time my daughter was a year old. when she could eat people food (not baby food) i started cooking again and she could entertain herself a bit while i cooked. as for the showers...uh...i still bathe with her in the tub cuz i can't figure out what to do with a 2 year old while i shower...and i'm afraid to wake her after she's in bed (the shower shares a wall with the bedroom). but at least i get clean more often.

Chelsea Cleo - posted on 05/07/2010




My daughter is 9 months old and still I end up only having 5 minute long showers before she wakes up crying or she has destroyed something in the lounge lol
It is really hard the first few weeks but it does get a lot easier! You just need to hang in there for a while until your wee one is older :)
With the exercise stuff, what I do (cos I cant go to the gym) i go onto youtube and i look up workouts or zumba workouts and I do it in my lounge. You can buy workout dvds and do it at home when baby is sleeping or when you have time to yourself?

Jessica - posted on 05/07/2010




I'm LOL at this post because I felt the same way for a while. My son is 10 months now. I would say probably not until he was at least 6 months did I start to feel more "normal." Up until that point he slept like CRAP for naps, and woke up several times a night. He was often over-tired and fussy. I felt like it was so hard to do anything "normal" because he constantly needed me and I was so exhausted all the time.

After 6 months the "Normalization" process began for me, lol. He started sleeping better after that point (though he still woke up 1-2x a night, but it was better than 4+). Since he started taking decent naps at regular times during the day, we were able to get on more of a regular routine with naps and eating and I felt better from that too, as opposed to that newborn randomness.

But I think I didn't REALLY start feeling back to normal until a couple months ago. Mainly because thats when he started sleeping through the night-finally! Its amazing how much better you feel when you get 8 hours of straight sleep a night. We had also weaned around that time so I'm not breastfeeding anymore- even though I loved it I'm also enjoying having my body back to myself again. I've been exercising and feel better in that way too.

Monica - posted on 05/07/2010




lol yes. for the next 2 decades!! :P jks. but u learn to cope. I shower when the kids r sleeping. I've gotten used to always waking up early and i think im ok with it now... You adapt. It won't change, but you'll get better at it. I still can't even go pee in peace LOL. And you won't be fat, it's great to get out w/the kids, wears em out and u get excercise at the same time!!! Good luck you'll be great!!!

Kylie - posted on 05/07/2010




Normal? What's that? LOL!
I am a second time Mum and if there is one thing that I have learned this time around it is that you have to find ways to help yourself. I agree with Susanna about the chair and swing idea. Does your LO have a play mat or a swing? - both have proven to be invaluable investments to me with both of my girls. My eldest loved the play mat whilst i was in the shower, the baby loves the swing. I just took the baby with their toys and placed them where I could see them and chat while I was in the shower. As long as I was chatting to them (yes, you feel like a crazy person) then I got a lovely shower.
As for exercise, I joined back up to the gym and I now go three nights a week after my hubby gets home from work. I have dinner prepared and the baby bathed - all he has to do is to feed her (she is on solids now and eats better for him than for me anyway!). I try to make sure that I get a workout - which is also amazing "me time" - and then i get home to do the bed time routine with my 3.5yr old.
You are certainly not destined to be fat, smelly and lonely although sometimes it feels that way doesn't it. Just find a way that works for you and then get help from wherever you can. Good luck and be sure to enjoy!

Susanna - posted on 05/07/2010




Hi Renee

This is exactly the way i felt and i thought i was the only one...

Having a baby does not = smelly fat lonely and ill informed :) it just means adjusting a little different... I am a first time mum and i thought i would never feel normal again, never thought id be able to have a shower for more than 2 mins at a time, and all i would get from other mums was it will get better it just takes time... i wanted it to be that time now...

Now my son is 4 months today and they were right it did get better,I feel i have more control over feeling normal again.. i bring him up with me in his chair and put him in the bathroom with me so i can still see him while im showering that way i can shave my legs if needed :) If i want to read i put him in his swing and let him look at the bright colours on the baby channel... and for excerise i go for walks with him.. How old is


It does get better :) Congrats on your baby :)

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