I have a 23 month old who refuses to go to bed by himself. He gets so upset that he throws up. Anyone have any suggestions?

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We had the same problem with our little boy crying until he threw up.  So much for crying it out...  So, after our "nite-nite" routine, I would put him in his crib but sit in the rocker in his room.  I would sing to him or talk to him if he wouldn't lay down and assure him that mom was still there with him.  Eventually, he would go to sleep.  After a while, I left before he fell asleep, but went back and checked on him.  It just took a while for him to get used to it.  And we still have nights when he wants to "wok-wok" instead of getting in his bed.  Unfortunately, you just have to figure out what works for you...

Jen - posted on 03/19/2009

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Hello! I had a problem with mine throwing up at night for a little while, and I have to chalk it up to teething. Those last molars have been a nightmare! But he is pretty easy to reason with, and we have a routine where we sit and read a few books and then it's lights out, I'll still sit with him for a little while and we say our goodnights to all we can think of, then we sing a few songs. he likes to have his blanket tag during all of this, and then i am firm about him laying in his bed, and i turn on his music and leave the room. this works most of the time...i don't like letting him cry it out...but i will let him fuss for a few minutes anyway, sometimes it's just a lure and he's really falling asleep!

Zoe - posted on 03/14/2009

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Hi, My little girl started to do this when she was about 20 months old.  We always had to stay in the room until she was asleep but she would lay in her crib.  Then all of a sudden she would not lay down, would cry and cry and cry until we lifted her out or she would throw up.  Then she would stop.  So we knew it was an attention thing. 



So I decided I had to be strong.  I started a new routine one night, which was to have milk on the bed, wtih daddy with daddy reading a book.  Then daddy would go and mummy would read a book and we would sing a couple of her nursery rhymes.  Then I would place her in her crib and say mummy had to go wash her cups for the next day.  I would say I will be back in 2 mins and true to my word I went back in 2 mins.  If she cried when I left, I would say if you continue to cry I won't come back for 5 minutes.  So she would stop crying, then I would go back after 2 minutes, give her another kiss and cuddle and say I needed to go get a bath and would be right back in 5 mins.  True to my word I would go back in 5 mins and say I had run the bath and now I was going in and I would be back in 10 mins and gave her another kiss and cuddle and tucked her in again.  Then by the time I went back she would have fallen asleep.  I kept this routine up for every night after this.  I stuck to a strict bed time schedule and routine.  It has worked.  I now, 2 months later am able to follow same routine but don't have to go back after the first time I go back at 5 mins. 



I think it was just a case of being firm, hard as it was, and if she threw up I would tell her I was mad and she had to sit on the bed while I changed the crib and she was going straight back in and I stuck to my word.



it was a tough time, but they do just do it to get you in the room.



 



Good luck!

Kathleen - posted on 03/14/2009

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Hello! In my experience, I have found that if I put them to sleep, then put them in their bed, it helps them to get used to it. Different children different techniques. Try rocking to sleep. Once asleep, keep the motion as you go to the crib or bed. Lay him down, pat his back or rub his head as you do it. Talk softly to him like "That's my good boy" "Mommy loves you" Slow your speech and patting at the same time. It helps if you have baby music playing in the background.
I have put (I have 6 children by the way) them to bed with me in my room or in their room then moved me or them.
One of my sisters was able to just leave her kids in their crib alone, I was too afraid of SIDS. I think she started that at birth. If your child is used to going to sleep with you, you will need to be creative. My husband has been understanding over the years. Although there are times that it has bothered him. That is when I started trying different things. It has been trial & error over the years. I have fixed their rooms up nicely Changed things. That worked for some and not for others. Good Luck! My heart goes out to you.

Melissa - posted on 03/14/2009

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That's horrible. Maybe you shouldn't let him get so upset that he throws up! Poor kid. Letting him "cry it out" obviously doesn't work. I could never put myself in your shoes and let that happen to my child so I can't give you any personal advice. Here's a book to check out: The Baby Sleep Book by Dr. Sears.

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