A little support needed!

Amy - posted on 11/29/2008

i have a 3 year old and i have only been away from him overnight once, when i was in the hospital given birth to his sister. i had a section so i was in there 2 nights. the first night was ok b/c i was so tired and still on pain meds. the 2nd night though i cried myself to sleep b/c i missed him so much. we also live in a basement appartment with my parents upstairs and he hasn't even slept up there yet if my husband and i go out when we get home i go up there and get him and bring him down into his own bed. its just knowing that he is home.

we went on a 4 day vaca to a beach when jayda was 4 months, it wasn't bad. i brought the sun tent down to the beach so she wouldn't be in the sun. nap time wasn't bad either b/c by then i was ready to lay down and relax. plus we brought the baby monitor so when she fell asleep we could still go out by the pool. you could also think about bringing a babysitter with you or look for a hotel that has babysitting services so you and your husband can have some "alone" time and enjoy yourselves.

Loren - posted on 11/27/2008

Hi,



I have left my daughter Cassidy once but only for a weekend she was 5 months old.

Even though i didnt want to leave her istill had tears in my eyes saying goodbye BUT once i left i was ok and honestly i only missed her on the way back home ( a 3 hour drive)





I don't think i could leave Cassidy for a week, especially when it comes to being overseas. Go with your gut feeling...JUST TAKE HER... otherwise you will be more worried about her than having a good time! ( its a mum thing)

Caryn - posted on 11/20/2008

Hi! I have a 7 month old boy and when he was 4 months, I left him with my mom so my husband and I could go to the Bahamas for his brother's wedding. It was so hard to leave him at home, but three nights of sleep with no interruptions was wonderful and just the break we needed to rejuvenate ourselves.



You have to do what makes you most comfortable. If that's taking her to Hawaii, then so be it! I'm sure she'll have a fabulous time as well!

Courtney - posted on 11/20/2008

I have left my son overnight 2 times, once when he was about 2 months old and I needed a full nights sleep so my m-i-l took him, then he realized how fun it is to wake up with a baby again after 25 years of not having too!!! The funny thing about it was that I couldn't sleep thta night because he wasn't there, again in August I left him overnight with my m-i-l because my sister got married and I knew I'd e drinking and out to late.... I have a daughter who's 6 I think it's a little easier to seperate with the second child, Am I the worst mom on here???? I just realized that I'm one of the very few that have left there children overnight!!! Yikes! But back to your question.... I could NOT leave either of my children for a week It'd be fun to take her I think

Jennifer - posted on 11/17/2008

i have a 3 year old and have only spent 3 nights apart from her, once when she was 18 months and my mom was dying to have her for a sleepover, once when she was 25 months and me and my hubby went for a night out for valentines day and the last time was when i was in the hospital for the night after i had my daughter in april. the only time i actually felt ok about it was when me and my husband went away for valentines when she was just over 2 years. i wouldnt mind going out for a whole day without kids once in a while, but sleeping with out them in the house with me? nevermind a whole different area code...i couldnt do it.

but keep in mind that there is only so much your 10 month old will be able to do with you. there is only so much fun in the sun time...you still have to have nap time eat time, etc. its not going to be a relaxing vacation at all, because the everyday stresses are still going to be there. im not telling you not to take her, but maybe keep in mind that its not going to be as relaxing of a vacation that you may think. maybe plan for another one when she gets a bit older and you can enjoy yourselves with or without her.

this is our reason that we havent taken a vacation yet. if we take the kids at this young age it wont be very fun for us and they wont remember it anyways and always feel better sleeping in their own beds. if we dont take the kids I wont have a great time because i will be missing them so much and wondering if they are ok the whole time. so we are planning on going later in life. so go, take her but remember its not going to be a "vacation" in the sense of the word! dont get your hopes up too high about it!

Dana - posted on 11/17/2008

my baby has been staying with grandma and grandpa since she was 6 weeks old.she is 6 months and has a bond that is strong with them.but i have 2 kids so getting that break every once and a while is nice. hpe this helps a little. you do have some anxiety leaving them at first. maybe start with one evening at a time and by the time u have to go, u will have a better time leaving. or just go with your instinct and take her. it is in the end up to u.

Ashleigh - posted on 11/17/2008

I haven't been apart from my baby either. The most i've been away is like 2 hours, and that's when he's been sleeping!! Do what you feel is right. Some people pressure me and tell me I should go out etc. but I feel im not ready yet, especially since I am breastfeeding also. He refuses to take a bottle, so there really isn't much I can do haha. I wouldn't feel ready to leave him for a week, and if you don't feel ready, bring him! What could be better then being on the beach with a cute little baby?? :)

Courtney - posted on 11/15/2008

I think most women here havent spent a night apart from their babies, I am different.. I first left mine for a week at 3 months old... my husband and I helped lead a missions trip for our youth group, it would have been pointless for me to be there, had I brought my son. He stayed with my inlaws who i completely trust.. i called everynight, he did fantastic... i had a hard time with it at night.. but he was so good.. two or three times a month he stays with my inlaws or our best friends that we trust... they offer to take him so we can have a night alone... Which is so vital..to be able to spend a night alone with your husband is amazing for your marriage.. Our son started sleeping through the night at two months, and in his own room. We love him so much, and enjoy spending so much time with him, but we also realize that its really important to have alone time.. i dont judge either way.. this is the best for our family... you do whats right for your family. :) Blessings.. (p.s my son's first plane ride was when he was two months.. he did great.. slept the entire trip (4hours) i brought tylenol just in case his ears hurt..)

Sarah - posted on 11/14/2008

I haven't been away from my 7month old yet. We don't live near any family, so there isn't really an option. I've been thinking more recently about having my parents come out and stay for the week and then maybe towards the end of the week my husband and I getting away for a night. We had our first date in months a couple weeks ago when my dad came to visit. He put my little girl to bed just find, despite all our worries. I would maybe try going away for a night and see how the two of you do. If you don't like take her with you. ; ) It would probably be worth the effort to try, but I don't know if I would have my first try so far away when it would be hard to get back if you needed to.

Linda - posted on 11/14/2008

we had our first night away from our baby last weekend (he stayed with inlaws), and I am going away for a long weeend next week. I'm a little nervous, but it will be good to get away. As long as you have someone you can trust completely you should go without. Not sure where you are travelling from, but please take in account the long flight (if you are from east coast) and the time difference. That can wreak havoc on your baby's schedule, and might interfere with your enjoyment while in hawaii. I went to Hawaii last year and really could not imagine that trip with a baby...But, to each his own. You really have to do what your instinct and heart tell you to do!

Katia - posted on 11/13/2008

My oldest is 3,5 years now and I've never been apart from here... The first time she was more than an hour away from me was when she start going to school. It was terrible for me, but she realy enjoys it and likes to go to school.

Try to don't feel the pressure... I know it's there, but ignore it. You're her mother, if you don't want to be apart from her, don't do it!
Going on vacation with kids is fun! I always bring mine with me...

Especially when you're still breastfeeding! Bravo and just take her with you! ;o)

Jennifer - posted on 11/12/2008

When we had our first, we went to Hawaii for a week when he was 7 or 8 mths. old. He did fine and we had a fabulous time. Don't forget it started out as just the two of you and spending alone time together is really important! My vote is enjoy being alone with your husband and know that she will be okay! You can call and check on her every day! :) By the way, that was the last time my husband and I got to take a vacation alone together. We now have a 7-mth.-old in addition and I wish we could do it again!

Robyn - posted on 11/12/2008

My son was born 4/28/08. Kaedyn has spent the night with family about 4 or 5 times since he was born. They adore him and miss him. It was really hard to leave him, but he did great and it was a nice quiet night for mommy and daddy since he still wakes up through the night.

Melissa - posted on 11/10/2008

Thanks everybody! I think sometimes its something a mama can only really grasp. It will be fun! And I would worry about her the whole time if she was not with me.

Kasey - posted on 11/10/2008

Now I sound like the bad mom of the group! I have left my little one on multiple occasions....He only has spent the night at my in-laws or my parents. To keep my own sanity I need my time away with my friends. Hope I don't sound awful!! I would have a hard time to be gone a whole week also, i've only left him for one night at a time.

Cheryl - posted on 11/10/2008

I haven't left my little one at all. Not even for an hour. Getting away sometimes sounds nice but I know I will only be thinking about my daughter, and wont be able to enjoy myself. So whatever you decide do what makes YOU comfortable not someone else.

Sabrina - posted on 11/10/2008

Sweetheart, go with how YOU feel and with what YOU think is right. My son (Dayne) was born on April 20/08 and yes he still sleeps with me. I agree with you its hard to imagine sleeping without him but we all know that eventually it has to happen. I try to do the once every other day so me and baby can get used to the idea of sleeping without eachother.



And I took Dayne on vacation with us and I had a lot of fun with him. I believe that I would of had a horrible time without him cause I'd constantly be worried if he's ok, and what "firsts" I'd be missing out on.



I hope this helped you.

Sabrina.

Taylor - posted on 11/09/2008

I think it would be a great vacation still if you took your baby. I know that personally I would worry like crazy all week if I didn't bring my kids. Also, because you haven't spent a night away from her yet, it would be doubly worse. I have had a night away from my son at least (he's the April baby, my daughter is the older one), so it would be *slightly* easier.

Karen - posted on 11/09/2008

I haven't left mine overnight yet, but I am going back to work in January and we have a conference at the end of the month that I may be attending overnight. My husband will be on leave while I'm away and I'm trying to talk him into coming with me and bringing Brandon. So far, no deal. It looks like I'll have my first night away from Brandon when he's about 10 months old.

I don't think a vacation with kids has to be bad - it's just different from when it was just you and your DH. EVERYTHING is now, eh?! Besides, if you miss your daughter the whole time and worry about her, then can it truly be called a vacation?

Cheri - posted on 11/09/2008

I have a six month old boy. He is my first and we have not spent a night apart yet. I'm a stay at home mom and truth be told we have rarely spent more than 3 hours apart. I like you cannot imagine not having him for the night. He still wakes up during the night and in general when he's tired he only wants me. If we went on vacation right now I am certain I would take him. A whole week at this point seems to much for me. I think that you should do what makes you happy. How much fun will a vacation be when you will be worrying the whole time you are there?

Melissa - posted on 11/08/2008

My first question should have started with "Have you left your baby for the night yet?"
Sorry, don't know how I missed that!!!!!!!!