My 3 year old daughter was potty trained now she is just going where ever she wants, I am at a loss!

Sarah - posted on 04/20/2011 ( 11 moms have responded )

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When my daughter was about 2 we were training her big brother and she basically trained her self and for the past year almost has had no problems, starting a few days ago she has started peeing on the floor, her pants or on the bathroom floor with not a care in the world. My mother in law said put her in pull ups but I am worried that she will just get lazy with that and just use those and not potty anymore, help??!!!

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Amelia - posted on 04/25/2011

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My almost 3 year old daughter, who has been potty trained for 8 months, peed in the floor yesterday. She just pulled off her pants and sat in a wooden rocking chair and peed right there. I know she did it because she was mad at me and she missed her nap yesterday so she was already in a bad mood (and that was a shock to me. She had never done anything like that before). However I made her clean it up herself. She did it just for the attention, so she had to suffer the consequences. It's not like she had an "accident". She flat-out, plain and simple, intentionally peed on the floor. In the end, she came and told me she was sorry for peeing on the floor. If you child does not have a UTI or any other medical condition, then I would not give in to pull-ups since she IS potty trained. They are super expensive and unnecessary. Have her clean the floor and rinse out her dirty clothes by herself (of course give some help if she really needs it). It's not like you are in the process of training her. She is fully trained and knows what is expected of her. However, there may be something else going on with her. Has anything recently changed in her life? Started preschool? Death or birth of a family member? Very young children often don't know how to express what they are feeling, so she may be upset, confused or frustrated and peeing on the floor may be the only way she know how to express herself. Good luck, and hopefully this is just a little phase and will pass quickly.

Suzanne - posted on 04/24/2011

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You need to have her checked for a bladder infection before you do anything, she may have one and not know how to tell you what she is feeling.

[deleted account]

It is possible she has an infection. We're dealing with something similar although my daughter is a tad older. She will have accidents at all times of the day ... at the dinner table, sitting on the floor, sitting in a chair. She has accidents at night and we use pull-ups for that. Since I had severe bladder reflux (had to be corrected by surgery), my 3 girls have always been under a watchful eye. The pediatricians have been on the fence with this one but they feel that it is worth sending us to a specialist to discuss the issue. I don't know if it is laziness, not caring or if there is something going on. We have ruled out diabetes. She's had no history of bladder/urine/kidney infections. Most kids will have a fever with an infection but I can also tell you that that is not always the case. Wasn't the case with me! Many times I had no fever. But one indicator of an infection is a VERY frequent accidents/trips to the potty with very little coming out. Watch for what is going on - is she engrossed in play or watching a show? Accidents in the bathroom I usually write off as not getting there in time (or not getting pants down fast enough). It's the accidents that happen anywhere and everywhere that are more bothersome in my experience.

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Jenna - posted on 04/29/2011

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This could be her showing a need for attention (even if you dont see anything wrong, there might be something wrong). I suggest sitting down, just you and her, and really talking. See if there is anything bothering her. I know she is young, but she will know how she feels.

Nicole - posted on 04/28/2011

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My daughter is now 6 and when she had infections she would go before she got to the toilet. I used to have to tell her if she needs to go then go. Don't wait. She used to get so into whatever she was doing that she didn't want to go to the potty. I wouldn't put her back in pull ups though. I tried that to and my daughter did get lazy and she knew that she didn't have to stop what she was doing to go.

Lil - posted on 04/26/2011

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My son was the same he was toilet trained he did not bed wet But he had a fright and it started to bed wet after that
But
I did find that if any of my kids wet the bed that was a sign to me that they was not well and was coming down with something
I told my doctor about this he said Lil you know your kids its not up to me to tell you that your wrong you have them all the time and you notice things that we don't
so just wait and see if the baby goes down with a child's
complaint do hope that you can get her back to normal soon
Lil

Katie - posted on 04/25/2011

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That's a tough one for me...it took me a LONG time to fully train my daughter...she peed consistently on the potty from 2&1/2 on, but insisted on pull-ups to poop in till she was well past 4. For me, I preferred that to pooping in her underwear; my firsthand experience with my many friends with kids, both genders, is that if they are unwilling to get on board with potty training, it doesn't matter if you keep them in pullups or make them wear underwear...they're going to not use the toilet until they are ready to do it, and the only difference between pullups and underwear is that pullups are an easier mess to clean up....unless you don't mind doing a lot of extra laundry and handwashing, that is.

I say put her in pullups, save yourself the extra mess and work....but put a consequence with the wearing of the pullups that she won't like. Tell her that since only babies wear pullups, then she can't do some big girl thing that she's gotten used to doing that she really likes. This worked for my cousin with her boys; they didn't wanna train, so she told them they couldn't go anywhere, because babies can't do the things that make those places fun. (You and I know this doesn't really make any sense, but logic is a moot point with 3 year olds, lol)

Just to give you my personal perspective, with my daughter, it finally had to come down to that she fully and truly outgrew pullups physically. She got to where the pullups were so tight that they were causing a risk of UTI and yeast infections from the poop having nowhere to go. I had to explain to her that she couldn't have pullups anymore because they were too small for her, she was too grown for them, and they'd make her sick if I let her keep wearing them. Luckily, and at last, this was the motivation she needed to break through whatever mental barrier she had about pooping in the toilet. . . a very frustrating barrier for me, who really couldn't understand how she could be resistant to that step when she's been so good about the peeing part of it all that she gets up to go to the toilet in the middle of the night if she needs to, and that since her first dry night. Children are just...weird about these things, LOL!

Amy - posted on 04/25/2011

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My son is three and doing the same thing. He poops in the potty, but he pees outside now. He loves going on the porch. I am not making a big deal about it, I just calmly tell him to go in the potty. A reaction will keep it up, he won't go to school doing it, as they say..:) don't worry.

Gayle - posted on 04/25/2011

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my 3yr old has been potty trained for what seems like forever, but recently if she feels she's not getting enough attention (we also have a 3month old) she will "not make it" to the potty, when in fact she will just go squat in the bathroom. it's her way of getting attention fast. if that is the case, you have to calmly tell them that it's not ok to do that on purpose, and it upsets you to have to clean up pee pee. but make sure to tell her if it was really an accident, you're not mad at her, and you need to know if she has a boo boo somewhere. since i had a little talk with my girl, she hasn't had anymore accidents and we have been pull-up free at night time also for about a month. we were using them at night still for a very long time.

Maurita - posted on 04/24/2011

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First thing don't react so much people do get potty trained it is common for kids to do all those behaviors for attention or control. Every time she does it just say no and be firm and let it go. I did use pull ups and my kids are 17 and 19 and they did become potty trained. People put way too much emphasis on potty training. Once I let go of the control my daughter decided she was going to be potty trained. Hang in there, Maurita

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