Separation anxiety and settling at night

Anne - posted on 10/19/2009 ( 4 moms have responded )

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My baby is 18 months old. He always used to be so easy to put to sleep at night. I would give him his milk, give him a cuddle, put him in his cot, say good night, switch off the light and close the door. And he would put himself to sleep, no crying, no problem! Now he cries as soon as I put him in his cot and doesn't stop til I take him out and then I have to sit with him in my lap until he falls asleep after half an hour or more. I've tied leaving him to cry a bit but he gets so worked up, I can't do it. He had become a bit clingy during the day time around about the time this started at night. Is it just part of separation anxiety and it'll pass or am I starting bad habits, does anyone have any suggestions?!! I'm reluctant to leave him to cry.

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Anne - posted on 11/01/2009

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Thanks for your help and reassurance. Matthew seems to be getting over it now. It just seemed like it was going to go on for ever!!

Brandy - posted on 10/19/2009

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My daughter is 17 months old and she got a cold a couple weeks ago, and that's when she started doing this. We shared a bed until she was 6 months and we usually do if she's going through something. So, we slept together while she was sick, then just when she started to go back to sleep in her own bed, she started getting her eye teeth in. So, we are still sleeping together. I don't think you are starting bad habits. I think if they need you, they let you know and if you respond to them, they take what they need from you for that period of time then go back to normal again. Every time my daughter has had an issue, we have slept with her in our bed, then when she feels better, there is no problem putting her back in her own. If it is easier for you, you could lay with him in your bed then just move him to his once he falls asleep. I think once the anxiety goes away, for whatever reason he is having it, he will go back to his old routine again. Sometimes, they just need their mommies a little more.

Kerry - posted on 10/19/2009

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My little girl is 18 months old and she gets a bit clingy during the afternoon and wants me to carry her around, but having two older boys she has had to learn that I can't be carrying her and dealing with their needs as well. It makes it easier to say no to her because I have the older siblings and i know when she lays on the floor sobbing that 99% of the time it is her wanting her own way. As for sleeping we have a set bed time and she even say goodbye and goes to her room to be put in her cot once her Pyjamas are on. We have the odd time when she doesn't want to nap during the day, where she may cry for arounf 20 minutes before she realises that she is not getting her own way and goes to sleep...

Brandi - posted on 10/19/2009

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I'm having close to the same problem with my daughter. However, it's not so much going down as staying down. It's 4am. After over an hour of trying to get her back to sleep. I gave up. If you want to be up, fine. Let's be awake. The only time she seems to settle is if she's on me. I can't lay on my back for long periods of time (I'm 30 weeks pregnant) never mind with an extra 25 pounds on me. What to do?!

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