Blog 18 of Top 25 Moms of Multiples - 2012

The Twin Source

by Carrie Carroll 

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How do you split your time so that all your children get enough attention?

The sad truth with twins is that they never get enough attention. There simply is always someone else to mind and care for too! To balance this reality, it can be a great treat to occasionally split the twins up so that Daddy has time with one and Mommy has time with the other. There are many other opportunities to nurture both children and make them feel special—for example, read two books to them, allowing each to pick one out. Be sure to create deep, strong discussions with both even at a very early age, being mindful to include them and pull them back into conversations to continually engage them.

Do have any tips for handling sibling rivalry?

Sibling rivalry without a doubt happens between children, and it can be even more pronounced with twins—particularly with same-sex twins. For parents, remembering that sibling rivalry is a natural occurrence is important when trying to manage it. My parenting philosophy revolves around the idea of being a coach or a guide for my twins. I feel that it is my role to guide them to make responsible and proper decisions. I don’t want to make those decisions for them—I want to encourage them to choose for themselves what is right, kind and fair. When it comes to sibling rivalry, I explain to my twins that it is their duty, as brother and sister, to encourage and cheer for one another instead of against one another. I also remind them that they are one another’s biggest advocates and closest allies. I try to communicate that there is great strength in their siblinghood. When one twin succeeds, the other should feel pride in the effort that has been made.

Moms of multiples are often experts at multitasking. Have you discovered a shortcut or trick that all moms could use?

Ahhh, the shortcuts! I have learned many. Here is a list of my top 5: • Take advantage of delivery whenever possible. Whether it is ordering diapers online or having groceries delivered, those minimal fees are worth every penny—particularly in the early days! Taking infant multiples to the grocery store is tough! Save yourself the stress and time by taking advantage of the service. • Use space in your nursery wisely. If possible, create a feeding station or pantry in an area of the nursery, with a tray to move dirty/clean bottles to and from the kitchen, a bottle warmer, burp cloths and breast pump equipment. If there is space, it’s great to also include a small refrigerator for those late night feedings! • Create a baby log for your babies. Write down their feedings, diaper changes and any information that you would like to record. It will become a great reference tool as they grow and when you have your doctor’s visits. • Pick out outfits the night before for your children, every night. That way you don’t have to think about it in the morning. If you get into a good, solid habit and stick with it, this can head off the conundrum of a 2-year-old demanding to wear the same shirt every day. • Exercise with your family. Take family walks, runs or bike rides. You can instill the importance of exercise in your children at a very early age, make great memories and do something that is good for your health all at one time!

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