No Cry Sleep Solution for Toddlers - any read this?

Karen - posted on 01/25/2011 ( 8 moms have responded )

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Hi All,

I'm starting to think about doing something different with my 26 month old daughter at night and am considering getting this book to see what ideas it has. Just wondering if it has anything new in it and if it would work with a continued bfing relationship.

Background:

My daughter has be co-sleeping with me from birth. She slept on top of me for the first few months. Her sleep routine has always been challenging for me (and for my husband. He had to move to another room when she was 4 months so he could get enough sleep) with months of wakings 8 times a night etc.

She is now over two and is still often waking every 2 hours. Sometimes I get a 3-4 hour block, but that's the exception not the rule. It's just not working for me anymore - I'm too tired (and I can't nap during the day anymore for who know what reason)! We are even delaying TTC because I cannot imagine being this tired AND pregnant.

My daughter usually nurses for awhile, unlatches (often with some prompting from me) and then falls asleep on her own. I've tried having her sleep on a mattress beside my bed but she says she needs to be closer to me. When I try to not nurse her when she wakes up at night she'll scream, cry and throw herself around for up to an hour and then lay there awake for another hour at which point I usually nurse her because I'm so exhausted.

I've had her tested for food allergies and we've recently changed her diet (about 3 weeks now). She eats well, bf's throughout the day, meets all her milestones, is extremely verbal, is very emotional.

Any thoughts/ideas?

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Karen - posted on 02/06/2011

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Aleksandra, we did a blood test through our naturopath - is that different than the standard allergy test you're referring too? A ton of things showed up and my naturopath is having us avoid a bunch of things (mostly all fruits and veggies). There may be a slow trend toward improvement since then, I'm not sure if it's related though. We've been doing the new diet for about a month now.
During the day she is generally happy (as long as I'm paying attention to her ... and only her). She certainly has her freak out moments - but not more than I'd expect for someone her age.
Her appetite is kind or all over the place. She's never a huge eater. Lately she's been having a hard time saying what she'd like to eat - whereas that was never a problem before.

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Aleks - posted on 02/06/2011

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Ah naturopath. They pretty much know what is going on more so than your average GP. ;-)
The reason I ask is because most people confuse allergies with intollerances and they are different. A doctor will usually run an allergy test. Usually an allergy is a whole immune system response, while an intollerance is one or two organs that protest (which after a while can spill to other areas of the body, but it can take a very long time).
As for whiney, well, cos if they are not feeling 100% toddlers can get whiney, grumpy, slappy, etc.
Appetite, I know toddlers usually have the worst appetites, but my girl (she is bad with eating at the best of times, LOL) is totally off most food when tummy upset due to exposure to her "bad" food, and only wants to nurse. A LOT!
That is why I asked those.... to see if it is food proplems or other. I have found that once I have fixed the food problems other "issues" lessen or become non existant.
Hope the explains a bit :-)

Aleks - posted on 02/06/2011

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That has been my daughter she is almost 24mths. Some nights she is worse than others. She sleeps worse when she has been exposed to foods which she has an intollerance to ( dairy, soy and now we are also suspecting yeast). Constantly needing to nurse, feels like she wants to attach every hour, half hour, etc. When for a few days her diet (or mine when it comes to dairy and soy) is free of the "culprits" she sleeps sooooo much better =)

How is your LO during the day, happy go luck and no problems, or is she a grumpy whiney toddler? How is her appetite generally? If all well, then it probably is not an allergy/intollerance. BTW intollerances to food will not show up on standard allergy tests. Most have to be discovered thru diet elimination method. This takes a few weeks as some foods do not exit the body for few weeks (ie, dairy takes 2-3 weeks to be eliminated from the body. Also, dairy is frequently present in a lot of processed foods, so exposure to it thru eating a processed food will affect the gut/bowel).



Now, because I have known about her food issues for a while now I have not weaned her at night, I co-sleep. My parnter, too, sleeps in a different bedroom during the weeknights. Now, on the good nights she still wakes once-twice during the night for a feed/check-in with mum.



Hope this helps and/or gives you a piece of mind :-)

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Karen, Your situation is my situation, almost exactly!
My 22mo old has this same night time behavior and I haven't slept more than 3-4 hours in a row since his birth. Urge!! However, I stopped nursing him in the bed a few months ago, and even though I now have to get up and go to "the nursing chair" at least twice every night to nurse him back to sleep, he usually only needs to nurse that two times and then goes right back to sleep for another 4 hours or so. He still wakes me up more often with all his night time noises (my husband sleeps right through it all!) but it's getting better. We tried not nursing at all at night, but then my son would just scream forever until I finally gave in, so that doesn't work!
I plan on weening by his second birthday, but only in hopes that he will then start sleeping through the night. I'd like to keep nursing for a while otherwise...

Karen - posted on 02/02/2011

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Thanks for your thoughts and suggestions ladies.
I've been thinking about it and since she does sleep fairly well sometimes (last night she was up twice) without me doing anything different, I'm thinking it really has nothing to do with me. She just has a need to check in with me some nights, and not as much other nights. I don't want to take a chance doing any damage to our relationship at this point.
My thoughts on this seem to swing from one side to the other every two weeks or so. I'm wondering if she's reacting to my hormonal cycle?? Anyone noticed that with their own kids?

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I know nothing about this book, but maybe something you could try that I find works for my family.



You put your daughter down for the night using your regular routine, and instead of you staying in bed with her, have your husband sleep with her that night. Obviously try this on a Friday(or whatever day is before his days off work), so that if it doesn't work out, he's able to function the next day.



I found with our daughter that so long as I'm in sight, she has to have me. She's completely capable of sleeping through the night, but if she can smell or feel me in her sleep, she'll wake up and demand that she nurse.



You have to make sure your husband understands he has to help out here, and to make a real effort. You've gone 2 years without a full nights sleep, he can make the sacrifice as well for a few weeks/months. Haha. Hope that helps.

Mary Renee - posted on 01/30/2011

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My 8 month old is like that, but luckily I've been able to start rocking her to sleep, so I alternate rocking her with nursing her (she wakes up every 1.5 hours all night long) Sometimes it doesn't work and she pushes against me and pulls down my shirt trying to get at my breast and then sometimes I have to rock her more vigorously (like my arms are a giant swing going over 180 degrees!) and she'll fall asleep that way. I took some time and consistency, and while it's a pain to get up and stand up when you're tired, sometimes she goes to sleep a LOT faster and I don't have to worry about her waking up when I unlatch her from my nipple.

The No-Cry Sleep Solution was written by a co-sleeping breastfeeding mother so I wouldn't rule it out. I have it. I've been giving some of the things a try (moved up bedtime, trying to have a nap routine, keeping the lights dim two hours before bedtime, etc) They might have more things to help you that couldn't help me as I live in a tiny one bedroom apartment so I couldn't sleep on a mattress in the floor as there is absolutely no place to put one and our bed frame is too big to get out of the door! Haha.

Katherine - posted on 01/26/2011

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My 22mo old does the same thing, as far as the temper tantrum in the middle of the night....don't know what that's all about....I would NOT try something new, just my opinion. But if you think it will work for you then go for it.
I have heard good things about The No Cry Sleep Solution. It has worked for some.

The problem is that she is probably very attached. So it may not work. Good luck though :)

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