HELP! my son is almost 2 1/2 years old and still not using words, and refuses to say the words he knows!

Deb - posted on 02/08/2010

Doug started speaking and then stopped for a while. almost a month ago, he decided to start babbling and now it's almost impossible to stem the tide at times. it may be that your son is being quiet and taking it all in.

Melanie - posted on 02/07/2010

Emily,

If your son had tubes, then there may have been fluid buildup that caused him to have problems hearing. This is a common cause of delayed language. Once his hearing better and with speech therapy, he should make good progress. Was his hearing ever tested?

Melanie

Emily - posted on 02/05/2010

My son doesn't talk yet, he had two sets of tubes in his ears. Seeing a speech therapist and had gone to see a specialist for autism. I don't know what else to do either, except keep up the work it will pay off. Thats all we can do.

Melanie - posted on 02/05/2010

Oh, I forgot to mention - Colleen calls it First Steps, but it is called different things in different states. In my state, it is called Infants and Toddlers. Your local school district should be able to direct you where to go.

Melanie - posted on 02/05/2010

My advice would be to call your local school district and get him evaluated for speech. This is the most common developmental delay and most kids who get therapy early are fine by the time they really get to the school system.

Who knows about Autism? Autism is only present in some cases of language delay. However, if you take him for testing, speech therapists are pretty good at spotting it so they'll let you know whether he needs to be evaluated for this.

The guidelines for needing testing are 15 words by 18 months and combining words by 2 years. It sounds like your son hasn't reached the combining words yet so he probably is language delayed. It's not a death sentence, but if you ignore it, it could end up causing lots of problems down the road. Sure, he could just start talking on his own, but he might not. Language delays that aren't remediated are related to problems with learning. They can also lead to behavioral problems due to the frustration of not being able to communicate. So, get started with the testing process so you can get your son talking.

Melanie

Natalie - posted on 02/04/2010

Hi Randi,

I just had to reply to your message, my son was exactly like yours!! My son started walking at 10 months, but when it came to talking it was a whole other story. Like your son, he started to say small words (like mommy, daddy & apple) but suddenly he just stopped, he would just point at the things he wanted, he just refused to speak, the more we would push him, the more he would refuse to cooperate. Gaby had better things to do than talk. I tried reading books to him, but he would get bored after 1 page. When we refused to give him things unless he spoke the word, he would throw tantrums. I started to worry that maybe he was autistic, friends and family would say boys are slower, he will catch up, bla, bla... We decided to stop pushing him to talk and just let things happen at HIS pace. Well one day instead of saying one word, he said one small sentence "what is it?", we congratulated him for saying those words, he was very proud, but we didn't push. We kept encouraging him to say things but we tried not to get pushy or frustrated with him if he didn't. We would just congratulate him when he did say words with hugs and kisses. He now says about 75-100 words, he's 2-1/2 but he has only been speaking for about 1-1/2 months. If you're worried that your son might be autistic then you should go get him tested, but I think your story sounds a lot like my story. My son is very strong willed, he does not want to be pushed into doing things, we decided to stand back and let him feel like he was in charge and now he's doing great, we can even sit down and read books together, but he has to pick the book! When I started reading to him he wouldn't even listen, he would run around but I just keep reading the book anyway, now he sits and listens to the whole book, he likes rhyming books the best, but he need to hear the book a few times before he decides that he likes it! My advice to you is hang in there, and don't be too hard on yourself or your son, let him be a kid. I'm so tired of hearing about all the things my child SHOULD know at his age, why not let kids be kids? Does my son really have to know 6 languages by the time he's 4? there is so much pressure to make our children into little geniuses, I think it's ridiculous!! Let him act like a monkey if that's what he wants to do, tell him he's a monkey and laugh, ask him what sound a monkey makes and then act like a monkey with him! My son likes to pretend he's a frog, he hops around the house and asks me to join him, i'm a little out of shape but I try to join him, that's what great memories are made of, not how many words he knew when he was 2. Let him watch a little TV, he might learn new words from it, and it might give you some ideas for some games to play with your son.

COLLEEN - posted on 02/03/2010

Hey there! I'm an ER nurse and have a 2 1/2 year old boy and a 1 year old boy. My 2 1/2 year old had some developmental problems like..not walking until 18 months and delayed speech. Even though he has been developing slow...he IS developing. What is concerning about your post is that your son sounds like he is regressing..which is why Autism was brought up to you. I don't know where you live but if I were in your shoes, I would have him evaluated through your state's First Steps Program. You should be able to get this information from your pediatrician or online. I would talk to them about getting him started on speech therapy and this might sound silly to you...but I would have him evaluated by an Ear, Nose, and Throat specialist. Even though he is an active, crazy, 2 1/2 year old, there may be something physically wrong that is delaying his speech. I'm sure you've heard that when kids, who have frequent ear infections, get tubes put in..their speech excels. I'm not saying that's the problem but it is something to consider with an ENT along with the formation of his mouth/palate/tongue etc. Andrew would have ear infections and I wouldn't even know it. No fever, he wasn' t pulling at his ears, no drainage, no fussing...he would go in for his scheduled check-ups and there they would be, so I did have them put in and noticed a big difference. He still doesn't say 20-40 words either though, so don't worry about that. Like I said earlier..he should be making a little progress not going backwards, so you should definitely take this a step further. Let me know what happens or if you have any other questions. I hope this helps...I know this is hard but you will get it figured out.