I am having trouble with my 16 mo old sleeping at night. She goes down fine and sleeps for about 4 hours then wakes up and wants to be held and usually does not go back to sleep for 3 or more hours. Any suggestions?

Laura - posted on 01/08/2009

I am also glad to see that my son is not the only one getting up at night. I could count the number of times he has slept through the night on one hand. He goes down awake in his crib just fine, but when he gets up at whatever time he decides to that night, he screams until I put him in bed with my husband and me. I have let him cry for two hours but since both my of us work, we need sleep. Joe is also working on 6 teeth and I have noticed that the sleeping has gotten worse. I hope that once the teeth come in, we can get him to at least stay in his crib all night.

Crystal - posted on 01/08/2009

Glad to see other moms are having the same problem with their kiddos...Like one of you said I'll just have to buckle down, bite the bullet and break some bad habits. 

Michelle - posted on 12/21/2008

The hardest part is hearing your baby cry the worst thing you could do is pick her up. I had the same trouble with my 16 month old she would not go down on her own. One night I did the usual bedtime routine said goodnight then walked out the door and waited at the top of the stairs. Oh my did she cry you know when its a cry for attention or not. I left her for two minutes then went in said goodnight laid her back down I didn't pick her up and left again gave it another 2 minutes went in again said goodnight and came out. I went in a third time 2 minutes later and didn't say a word just laid her down I then kept doing that till she went. It is hard work but perseverence pays off. The second night it only took ten minutes and soon it was just straight in and goodnight. The key is after the second time if you have to go in don;t say anything to your child just lay them down they soon get sick of you not showing them any attention. Hope that is of some help

Katie - posted on 12/16/2008

Could she be getting to much sleep during the day? My daughter just went from 2- 2hour naps a day down to 1- 2 1/2 afternnon nap. She is now sleeping even longer at night, (instead of 12 hours 13 - 14 hours) so maybe she is napping to much during the day?

Teresa - posted on 12/16/2008

I am also having sleeping issues but my son doesn't cry. He babbles. Babbles, sometimes loudly, for hours. At 4:30 in the morning. EVERY MORNING. FOR MONTHS. It's the most frustrating thing. He doesn't cry out for me. He doesn't fuss. He just plays and talks or jumps up and down in his crib. Only when I do go in there and put the pacifier in his mouth (which sometimes is right next to him), lay him back down, and tell him to go to sleep does he settle back down and go to sleep for the rest of the night. I have let him "play" for over and hour to see if he'd tire himself out and go back to sleep after realizing no one was coming in to play with him. We have him on a regular sleeping schedule to bed at 9 up by 8:30, 2 to 3 hours nap in the afternoon. I don't get it. I don't make getting up fun or give him hugs or kisses. I try to be as boring as possible in the hope he loses interest in waking up at that hour. So unless he has a poopy diaper (which is rare at night), I don't even get him out of the crib. Anyone have any idea's as to why he'd wake up? It's been very consistant, up at once every night regardless of how long or short his nap is or what time he goes to bed or if he is teething or not. I'm a tired momma...but is there any other kind? :) Teresa

Amanda - posted on 12/15/2008

Thank you all so much. It is sometimes just nice to know that there are others out there that are having the same problem. And the funny thing about all this is that the night after i posted this she slept all night from 10:30-6:30 the next morning. I felt like a new woman. I guess she will have her nights. From teething to just wanting to be held, am not sure what her problem is but I guess that one night a week that she sleeps through is better than none. I guess it is just hard to not to know just what she wants 24/7. Thank you all and keep the advise coming.

Jana - posted on 12/15/2008

Just an update, the second night after letting my daughter "cry it out" she went to bed fine and slept the whole night. I heard her wake up and move around but she never cried for me to come get her. So "crying it out" worked after 1 night. Follow your gut and you will find a technique that works for you and your family. I felt horrible while she was crying, but sometime you have to use tough love. Good luck.

Tatiana - posted on 12/15/2008

I know how you must be feeling as my 16 month old is a bad sleeper as well. I am against the cry it out approach as I am now confindent that there are other ways (which admittedly take more time & energy) which have the same good results. I would strongly recommend the following book (you can find it on Amazon): the 'No Cry Sleep Solution for Toddlers & Preschoolers' by Elizabeth Pantley. Even if you don't follow all her suggestions you can find plenty of great tips! Hope this helped! Tatiana

Monica - posted on 12/14/2008

William was a bad sleeper untill I started putting him in his crib awake instead of holding him, he didn't like it at first but, he just learned to fall asleep on his own.

for a while he would still wake up in the middle of the night and want me but, I knew it would be better for both of us to get out of that habbit. I started letting him cry it out, I would check on him and lay him back down and tell him it was night night time and then leave. each night he would cry less and less and eventually he stoped waking up at night! It's been great getting sleep!

Krista - posted on 12/14/2008

i don't think allowing a baby to cry it out alone when they are used to someone coming to them is a good idea. how scared they must feel, wondering where their parents are! that said, i did a modified version where i stayed by the crib and offered to pat my son's back. the hard part is not picking them up, but after a few nights it had worked. i also stopped nursing in the middle of the night. that was tough, and took my husband having to get up and go to him for a few nights, but it eliminated the night waking. now, if he wakes, i hear him turn his music on and go back to sleep! i never thought the day would come, b/c he was a notorious night-waker!! good luck!

Bobbi - posted on 12/13/2008

I also am having troubles with my son. The difference is, I started a very bad habit of letting him sleep with me and my husband. He was a preemie and had troubles with his lungs. I was so scared to have him in another room. So, I've tried putting him in his crib off and on since he was 6 months and no such luck. He constantly screams. Now in the middle of the night if he wakes up in his crib he cries uncontrollably and wants to nurse 2x-3x during the night. He never fully wakes up just cries out. Also, I was watching something on The Doctors tv show the other day about letting a baby cry for more than 15-20 mins. They said its not good to do it because they don't get as much oxygen to their brains as they should be getting. I wish I could give you some advice but I'm needing some also. Good Luck!!!!

Jana - posted on 12/13/2008

I am going through the same thing right now! Last night I finally had to let my daughter (16 months) cry it out. She went down fine, then she was awake 3 hours later. I held her to make sure she was alright, then I put her in her crib and she cried/screamed for 1 1/2 hours. Then slept in late the next morning. Tonight only took 4 minutes of crying before she fell asleep. I don't know what will happen tomorrow night, but it worked for tonight. So not really much in the "advice" category, but just reassurance that it is ok to let them cry it out. I hated every minute of listening to her scream, but I HAD to break the habit of her wanting to be held at night. Good luck, you know what you baby needs just follow you gut.

Shana - posted on 12/13/2008

Amanda ~ Awwhhh...she is a cutie pie! Sorry she is having trouble sleeping...it's hard on all of us...First, is there a possibility she's teething? Second, has there been any change recently to her daytime routine? Third, when she wakes up, what is the intensity of the crying? And how long has this been occuring? I have twin 15 1/2 mo olds and we've had recent ups and downs with sleeping disturbances...Shana