i need help with a big problem

Tricia - posted on 01/01/2010

obviously its in your mind to be with someone else so why are you making it complicated and staying. Just leave if your not happy. Your baby will be happier if you leave anyways they pick up on all that tention!!

Jessica - posted on 01/01/2010

i would talk to him. i mean my situation with jason was different but sometimes threatening them works. just tell him look get a job or else im leaving bc im tired of you not working or helping me out with trent. sometimes leaving works out alot better though :( you'll figure something out

Brittani - posted on 12/31/2009

Money doesnt bring happiness, but it sure does help! Do what you feel is right and it'll work out = D

Florencia - posted on 12/31/2009

I went through this too. I left him finally when our child was 2. He used me and cheated on me, disrespected and humiliated me. He hasn't really changed and my daughter just turned 9. He's a dad when it is convenient for him. He cries abt having to give me less then $172.00 in child support a month and really he doesn't even pay that. Sometimes leaving them will make them realize what is truly important and they'll grow up, and then others just are who they are. Don't expect anybody to be the answer to your problem. The best thing for u is to find a way to do it all by yourself so u don't have to feel trapped and need to depend or anybody else. The grass isn't always greener on the other side. Just because this other guy sounds like he's the one doesn't mean that, that is who will truly make you happy. I been there done that. I ended up living in my own apartment and doing it all and felt great abt it. I to met a guy I was friends with for 5 yrs loves kids, is a great supportive, responsible guy that has it together. We finally started a relationship and together we make each other better. This is who I have my 2nd daughter with born August 29th 2009. He's the best. He's been more of a father to my daughter this past year and a half than her father has been these past 9 yrs. Together we're better but i know if i had to that i could do it on my own. I would recommend that for all mothers out. There's nothing worse then being unhappy and feeling trapped or being stuck.

Taheerah - posted on 12/30/2009

i agree with alot of the previous post. you have to do whats best for you and your son. just make sure you always leave that door open for him to be a father to his son and not take him out of his life completely. you dont have to be together for him to be a father to your little one. have a blessed and happy new year

Kenya - posted on 12/30/2009

First of all, I don't know why you can't make this decision for yourself. Your baby is and should be your main priority, however if no one is working you child will suffer. Obviously you are not happy and have already found someone else. Before you do anything, make sure this sweet someone else realizes that you come with baggage, and your baby comes first. Simply kick babies daddy out, find you a good job, and look to family for love and support. Good luck.

Nicole - posted on 12/30/2009

You have to do what is best for you and your baby! I've always said any dingdong can be a father but it takes a special man to be a dad. Part of being a good dad is supporting your child and family. If he can't be bothered to do that then it's time to kick him to the curb! It's not like he can never see his son but you shouldn't have to deal with this kind of stress on top of being a new mom. Good luck with whatever you decide to do.

Melissa - posted on 12/30/2009

get rid of him hun. he's bringin ya down! you can be a more productive mom without him. and just cuz your not in a relationship doesnt mean you are separating your child from his dad. bottom line: he needs a job!

Kirsty - posted on 12/30/2009

hey sweeties you dont sounnd happy with him as a person... thats wat u have to look at... i left my babies dady and now wth someone i adore (my babies nearly 5 months i left him at 1 month, he was lazy didnt do anythin, the new one is a god sent) i am much happier for it and so is my son as they feel the tenson u are feeling. my babies dad still sees him one a week for a few hours ( if he turns up so far its only been 3 tmes in 4 months) it gets a bit messy sometimes as we have lots of fights over me leaving him but he still hasnt changed so i am better off. and so will u be.... u need to be happy if ur happy ur baby will be happy.. so i agree u should consider moving on..DONT STAY WITTH SOMEONE COZ OF A BABY. it will destroy u.... :) hope that helps xx

Sammy - posted on 12/29/2009

LEAVE HIM!!!!!!!lol i supported my baby daddy from dec 08 till about 3 months ago....he was cheating on me and i was the only one working up until i had my son and when i found out he was cheating and quit his job he got for a week just so he could be with that girl that day i was like get out of my apartment and it was the best thing i ever did because the stress that is lifted is amazing and it is wat was best for my son and myself because he doesnt deserve a crappy father that doesnt want to try to support his son

Amy - posted on 12/29/2009

Honey you have to do what is best for you and your son and only you can make this hard decision. You don't have to separate your son from his father just because you are no longer together, as hard as it may be he would just have to make the time and effort to see his son and you would have to make sure it happens..

Sara - posted on 12/26/2009

I would agree with the post below. If you do leave and your son's father wants to be active in his life, do not keep your son from him. If you find happiness elsewhere and your son can have an active role with his father, then this would be positive for your son.
It is very difficult out there (especially right now), and we never know what will happen so I also suggest going back to school and increasing your education, unless you already have a degree so you can provide by yourself for you and your son....Happy Holidays and Happy New Year.

Sarah - posted on 12/24/2009

I have always said... babies do NOT make a marriage... or in your case, a relationship. Yes, he is his son, but that does not mean he is someone you are suppose to be with. You also have to not only think of yourself, but also the wellbeing of your son. If you are in a unhappy relationship, that will be shown to your son and will make him unhappy too. If you are happy, protected, loved, provided for, and safe... then your son will be too.



I hope this helps. Merry Christmas to you and your family!