Talking and Potty

Alycia - posted on 02/08/2011 ( 44 moms have responded )

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My 17 month old doesn't talk at all and I was wondering how many other's are talking. My son talked a lot by this age, and it's a struggle to get my daughter to say anything. She answer's questions by shaking her head, and she "sings" and dances a lot but doesn't talk. I've heard her say many words but she's said it about once and never again.

She also wants to start using the potty but I'm having a horrible time with it. She wants to pee standing up and I've even made my son sit and she STILL wants to stand. I've tried to give up on the potty training for now, but she won't give up. She takes off her diapers, and has even had many accidents near or in the bathroom. I don't know what to do, any advice is greatly appreciated!!

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Lacee - posted on 02/17/2011

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my daughter izabella is 18 months and only says a couple words. her adenoids were removed and tubes were put into her ears which i learned were the cause of her not talking cause she wasn't able to hear us. her surgery was in early december and she still isn't talking or making any effort to talk. i spoke to my professor Dr Campbell, who specializes in early childhood development and has almost 40 years of experience with infants & toddlers. before izabella's surgery Dr Campbell did a child study & observation on her, izabella did extremely well and Dr Campbell was surprised at how smart she is. in many other area's she is ahead...aside from talking. i asked her what i could do to encourage her to talk and she told me the most important thing is to give her choices & use short simple sentences with her. when your daughter wants something don't just give it to her, have 2 sip cups and say "do you want your dora cup or your cinderella cup?" let her look at them ask her again and tell her to tell "mommy which she wants and mommy will give it to her." even with her toys "do you want your baby or your book?" "tell mommy, baby or book?" always tell her to "use her words" it'll take some time for her to understand what you want her to do but it will encourage her to start talking. the main problem you (and i) may face is that since the girls aren't talking they won't be able to express what they need and will become very frustrated because they can't get their point across to us to tell us what they want and throw a beyond awful temper tantrum. my professor told me this is the time now to start early intervention w/your child (izabella already has appt's lined up for hearing & speech therapy plus her day care works with her and does some speech activities with her every day) according to dr's at 18 months they should be saying 8 words however, most 18 month olds say 15-20. if you haven't yet talked to your child's pediatrician you should, express your concerns and ask what can be done to make sure there's nothing wrong. if you have your child in day care ask them to work with her for 30 minutes a day reading and talking to her again anything that will encourage her to talk. and make sure you mom are reading to her not even so much reading but more pointing at pictures, telling her "fish, can you say fish?"repeat it work with her and be patient. again it'll take her some time to understand what you want her to do but she'll get it. just remember; options, short, & simple sentences! i just talked to my professor about this tonight so when i saw your post i had to respond...this is actually the first time i've posted to anyone on here but i know what you're going through. good luck and remember be patient with her...she'll get it! and then if you have the same fear i do, that once my daughter starts talking she won't stop. she'll be that little girl who keeps on "mommy, mommy, mommy, mommy, look at what i can do! mommy look at me." then we'll be asking for the days back that she didn't talk! ;)

Aileen - posted on 02/10/2011

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As far as talking, when you have your 18 month check up you can talk to the doc about it. There should be some kind of early intervention program in your area that can evaluate children - even at this age - and it's free. I'm not saying your daughter needs to be evaluated, but if you are concerned you should check it out with the doc and know that there are people who can "test" her and tell you if all seems to be normal. That said, "normal" is a range. Some kids don't talk much until they suddenly say complete sentences (my sister didn't really talk until age 3 and then we couldn't get her to stop!).

Potty training - I know that it's tough for girls to pee standing up, but if you have a little potty on the floor she might be able to do it. I'd rather have her trying in the bathroom over the potty than telling her to do it in her diaper instead. She's got the idea already - that's a big step. Have you let her in the bathroom when you are going? Maybe if she sees that you sit to pee she'll want to try it, too.

With all things - every child is different and you just have to enjoy the ride!

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Katie - posted on 02/24/2011

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I cant help with the potty training, my daughter is the same age and were not attempting that until the summer..
My daughter too, says loads of things once but doesnt bother saying it again until further down the line. Myself and her father aren't too worried about it as were sure she will pick it up in her own time,
Chin Up :D xx

Nicole - posted on 02/24/2011

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My boy is 18 months and was 2 months prem. He says Wow, mamma, Dadda lol I think they are all different and no comparison needs to be made!! I am happy with his progress!

Debbie - posted on 02/21/2011

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my son doesn't talk much either and he is 18 months, babbles allot. my daugther who's three because the babysitter used to let her point to everything, so trying real hard to break the habit. i dont give in anymore until she actually tells me what she wants

Crystal - posted on 02/21/2011

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I would say this.. My daughter just turn 18 months on Feb. 2nd and does not say a single word. At her well baby checkup they asked also if she communicates in non-verbal ways. Does she shake her head yes or no? If you ask her to go get her shoes will she go get them for you? If your child does not say many words or none at 18 months it is okay as long as they are communicating non-verbally. The child just may not want to talk. However, if there is no communication at all it could be a hearing problem, my daughter just had tubes put in her ears.

Amiee - posted on 02/21/2011

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My son is turning 18 months in a few days and isn't really talking yet either. He says Mama, Dada, and then uh-hu, hu? and num-num (when ever he's hungry) His doctor said not to worry, that the most important part is he is communicating. He shakes his head for yes and no, points to what he wants and he understand words, like he'll go get his "blankey" or a bowl or shoe when I ask him to. For the most part each child develops differently but his doctor said instead of just giving him his milk or what ever he's pointing to I can try and encourage him to say it first. But not to the point of frustration.

On potty training we haven't even tried yet... Hes my first and boy so I'm intimidated by the whole process. For the most part I'm hearing its more difficult to train boys and to wait it he's ready... but I'm not sure how I'll tell he's ready? I suppose it'll just be evident that he's more interested than not? Good luck!

Susan - posted on 02/20/2011

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I am also having trouble getting my son who is 18 months old to talk. He grunts, whines, and points. We both get frustrated b/c I don't always know what he is saying and he is trying so desperately to tell me. I have tried showing him how to say the words by watching me, but he still gets frustrated. The hardest part of all is I am bipolar and have real bad anxiety issues so when he get whiney it is really hard on me. I have a wonderful husband who is a great support system and we are both on the same page with how we are trying to help him say his words. He has some and those are great, but everyday stuff like cup, juice, etc no go at all. Will take any suggestions :)

Diane - posted on 02/20/2011

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my 18 month old daughter says momma, poppop, zuse(our dog) sissy, no go and love you, hi, by hello thank you but thats about it, they will talk when they are ready nothing to be worried about especially at this age. dont worrry just enjoy your time becaue before you know it you wont be able to get her to stop talking.

Shelly - posted on 02/20/2011

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I am so happy to hear mine isn't the only one!!! He's quiet but such a joy that's for sure! I have 21 older daughters and rather enjoy 1 of the 3 being quiet. :) My oldest didn't talk until she was almost 2-1/2 but spoke very clearly and hasn't been quiet since and she's 11 now.

Jessica - posted on 02/19/2011

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My son Zoen is 18 months old and doesnt talk either. He will say Aaa" or momma if he really wants something. You can tell he understand 95% of what is said to him. By the the time my dauer Hyia was 1yrs old she spoke two languages and my son Jory was 15 months before hes started. Now we cant get a word in between those two. They say if a child has very chatty sibs then that child may talk late. I wouldnt worry about it. She will talk when she is ready.



With the potty training... My oldest boy did everything you little one is doing. What I did was I put his potty chair in a corner of the room where the most accidents have happened and another near the bathroom. He started using them on his own within a week of the seats being put there. I havent even tried with Zoen yet cause he has no interest in it yet

Sol Juliana - posted on 02/19/2011

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My daughter talks non stop, she says her name, ours, tells me what she wants for breakfast, eggs- juice-water-milk, etc. but remember that not all kids are the same, don't worry about that...try to talk to her as much as you canl, also read to her, this way she will have lots of vocabulary and when she start talking it will be much easier.
I have not started potty training yet, but my daughter tells me when she is peeing and I ask her if she wants to go to the bathroom, sometimes she says yes, but some not...

Mary - posted on 02/19/2011

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My doctor says that typically they expect about 5-10 words by 18 months old. My daughter doesn't have any full words that she says in reference to things. She's just starting to say the first syllables of words ( Like "Ba" for ball, "Duh" for done, etc). My doctor said we could either start intervention now or give it 3-4 months then get intervention if she hasn't started talking by then. She also has an older sibling that doesn't let her get a word in and always answers for her, so that could be a big part of the problem. We have opted to give her a few months and work with her ourselves.

Nahla - posted on 02/18/2011

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My daughter is 17 months and says more than 30 words & sings I love you with barney :) (her name, mama, dada, baby, barney, saun the sheap, water, food, come, go, eat, sit, sleep, take, byebye, grandma, grandpa, uncle, I love you, hello, cat, dog, park, tree, kitty, shoes and others). As for potty, she would go no.2 on the toilet seat and i've taught her to come tell me everytime she needs to go and we run to the toilet, no.1 is a bit hard though and im leaving it for later. she still wears the diaper ofcourse. I wouldnt worry if i was you, each child speaks on their own time & walks on their own time too. Just keep talking to her and when she's ready, she will speak :D Goodluck!

Tracy - posted on 02/17/2011

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My son will be 18 months old on the 26th. I had him evalated at 17 months. They said he should be able to say 10-15 words. He is at 3. They are daddy, da, and that. But because he is excelling in other areas we don't quaifiy at this time. We are suppose to have him re-evelated at 20 months and he should know 20 words and use them frequently. He knows what he wants and points for things. He also know what you are talking about just not the words that go with it. We had talked about using sign and words but he shows not interest. We thought this might help him not get so frustrated.
My son is also wanting to use the potty. If we say do you have to go potty he runs for the bathroom. We try putting him on and sometimes he goes. We put him on in the morning and at night and he usually goes. He wants to copy his big sister. But we are not pushing it.

Kimberley - posted on 02/17/2011

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Hiya my daughter can say quite alot im suprised , mum dad nanna , joe(her uncle) sez(her auntie) sock shoe juice , yes no , bed chips, dog,cat,pizza,zip and more .. i havent even thought of potty training yet help anyone xxxx

Marla - posted on 02/16/2011

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Talking... my son was way above the curve at 12 mths he spoke 33 words and signed 77 and it just multiplied from there. My daughter spoke (almost) 3 words at 12 months and signed 20 words. She is now doing better but we sometimes have a hard time understanding the sounds she says but when she signs at the same time we understand her and acknowledge her and she is so proud she works harder on the sounds. I totally recommend signing with your kids at any age. My 3 yr old is still signing and we are working on emotions and alphabets which gives us a way to play and talk about it.

Potty - my daughter started at 15 mths using the potty (now is 18 mths) and we found she doesn't have the control to hold it. She just wants to be with her brother. We put her on the potty and she can't touch the floor, but if she does make a mess we have her help clean it up and make a big deal of cleaning and then cleaning her up. She stopped trying to take of her diaper and signs potty to us when she wants to go.

Kisha - posted on 02/16/2011

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Hello Sweety ;-), my son just turned 18 mos on Sunday. Any sweety when I tell you boys are lazy they truely are. My son just recently started getting teeth about 2mos ago. He says words when he wants to and we are alone. Everybody swears Im crazy and Im hearing things until he finally decides to say something in front of others (Lol).. Oh'my the potty training he wont sit on the potty without his clothes on but he will sit with clothes on and will get a book and read it while sitting there go figure. I was told thats good because he's getting use to it and when he's ready he stay on the potty without having clothes on he will. All I would like to say njoy the less talking cause when they starts they never shuts up and dont stress about the potty when ur child is fully ready and comfortable with it, it will be no problem.. Take care and best wishes to you and ur darling!

Stephanie - posted on 02/15/2011

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My son is 18 months and is talking a ton!!!! He knows about 150 words, can count to 3, recognizes 19 letters and about 8 shapes. However that is not typical. What is "normal" for an 18 month old is about 5-7 words.

On the potty subject...we just bought him his own little potty and he will sit on it before his bath/bed time and I will ask if he wants to go before nap (often tell me no) but we haven't successfully used it yet. He just sits there and then gets off and looks in it. He come in the bathroom when I go so he can see what is going on. Hopefully I can catch him when he needs to go soon!

Krista - posted on 02/15/2011

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My 18 month old doesn't say a whole lot. He says "hi", "uh-oh" (while clapping his hands over his cheeks -- too cute!), "dada", "that (dat)", and "there (thaaaa)". I think he's also getting to the point of saying "bear" and "ball", but right now I can't differentiate between the two, because they sound identical. I wouldn't worry about it just yet -- she'll probably open up like floodgates before too long and then you won't be able to shut her up!

As far as the potty training...that's a tough one, because she obviously wants to do SOMETHING with the potty. The only thing I can think of is to keep taking her in the bathroom with her and show her that we sit on the potty to pee.

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My 18 month old knows a lot of words, but she only uses uh-oh, mama, dada, duck, more on a consistent basis. She gestures and signs a lot. She loves music too, and loves to read books. I talk to her a lot and know from what other moms have told me, she will talk more on her own time. She listens very well and can follow directions, so I know she understands very well. As for potty training, I won't start until she starts showing an interest.

Jennifer - posted on 02/14/2011

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My son says about 80 - 100 words and can use them properly mostly pronouncing them correctly. BUT, he comes from a family of teachers who are constantly bombarding him with stimulation as well as two brothers who are 9 and 10; he wants to imitate them. He has never been talked to like a baby with "baby words" because then he would only have to re-learn the real words for those things. I am certainly not saying that your little girl doesn't get the same stimulation, but all kids progress at different rates; just keep talking to her at her level, but not baby words. Over-pronounce words and repeat. Keep at it...

Marta - posted on 02/14/2011

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My daughter knows a lot of random, not very useful words, like booger and tickle tickle. But she also knows up, bye bye, night night, hi, there ya go, all done, thank you, mama, dadda, kitty, cracker and sissy. But getting her to actually use them...now that is an entirely different story!

As far as potty training goes, we're not ready yet. She shows no interest, and doesn't even complain once she has a dirty diaper. I'm not really in a rush though. I think right now it would just be me fighting an uphill battle. I'll worry about it when she's 2.

Tara - posted on 02/14/2011

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My daughter is 17 months old and she says about ten words and one two word combination (what's that?). I think it is normal for patents to only understand some of what their babies are saying. They are still very young.
She also loves to dance and sing. Must be a girl thing. My son never really got into that.
As for the potty, she will sit on it and then try to stand in it. I don't think she is quite ready yet. Lol
Good luck to us all!

Rhiain - posted on 02/14/2011

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My 17month daughter says many words, but I think each child's development is different. She says 'Hi' to pets and family members (by name - like "hi willy"). She says I know, Okay, cheese, hotdog, book, pig, duck, teddy, box, socks, shoes, boots, sheep, rabbit, car, baby, cow, nose, bottle, coat and others. She also mimics what I say a lot. She'll ask 'what's that?' or "where'd it go?'. However, she knows so much more than what she's able to speak, and I think that's the really important part. She can point out trees, the sun, butterflies, ladybugs, all basic farm animals and some fruits and vegetables. Clearly she understands more than what she's able to say, and that's the important thing.

Ashlee - posted on 02/13/2011

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My son is 18 months today says mom dada nana and papa but he understands things. I can say go put that in garbage and he will do it. Ask him to get his cup or get his coat and he does it.

Bryony - posted on 02/13/2011

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My 18 month old only says 3 words and then only when he feels like it! I know he understands us though so I'm not worried, they all get around to it in their own time. Don't worry :)

Naomi-leigh - posted on 02/13/2011

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my son is 17 months old and only says mum, grunts a lot and generally talks in baby babble.i always know what it is that he wants and i know he understands certain things that i say.....but keep wondering if he is actually understanding or im just hoping and telling myself he can :/ not even thinking about potty training as of yet though

Stacie - posted on 02/12/2011

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My first daughter started everything very early she never crawled she went straight to walking. Started talking at ten months. But she wouldnt potty train till she was three. Now here is my second daughter and at seventeen months she didnt start crawling till eight months, walked at eleven months. Now at seventeen months she will not talk, but potty training is much eaiser with her she doesnt do it all the time. So its hard because i expected her to be on the same level as her big sister. And the Doctor told me not to compare the two. But she also said if a child is not talking by the time they are eighteen months then it would be time for speech therepy. I think kids will do what needs to be done in there own sweet time. As parents its hard because we live in such a fast world and we want things to be done ASAP. So of coarse we can move on to the next project. I think a child will do what a child is ready to do. And i guess we just get to sit back and wait.

Krystal - posted on 02/12/2011

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well my daughter. is officially 18months today. she doesnt speak much words. either. she mostly speaks in her own language and we try to work with her. she speaks her own bable and we encourage her to speak other words and thats how shes slowly learning the words. we let her bable as if we understand and we talk back with simple answers and teaching her at the same time. as for potty training, shes not showing signs of wanting to do that yet. right now shes working on showering herself with no help and brushing her own teeth. lol. ill take that first. hope this helps. oh another thing u can try is what my mom did with me, u can buy flash cards and help her that way.

Alexis - posted on 02/12/2011

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Sounds like she understands a lot and is still communicating in non-verbal ways. I wouldnt worry it may just be a personality thing. The potty thing, im not sure how to convert her to sitting, I don't have much experience in the potty training area, especially of girls LOL. Good Luck.

Era - posted on 02/11/2011

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my son will be 18 months on February 20th and he does not say a single word but he seems like a very happy baby. Should I be concerned?

Selene - posted on 02/11/2011

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I feel much better hearing all your replies! My 18 mo old says about a dozen words.. I thought that was little.. But seems like " normal". I have heard everyone is different ofcourse. I have a cousin my son's age and he is a parrot!

Nisha - posted on 02/11/2011

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All my son says is, Mom, Dad, Nan, & Hi...other then that, he yells, hollers to see how loud his sounds can be; but he does it in a playful happy way. He has no interest in the potty...My biggest issue is figuring why he wont pick food up to feed himself, but he will pick it up and put it back on a plate or in a bowl. I am due with baby #2 in April and my goal is for him to pick food up and feed himself (fingers crossed it happens sooner rather then later)

Stephanie - posted on 02/10/2011

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My 17 month old son says probably around 30 words (bath, duck, bird, bubbles, puzzle, book, grandpa etc etc). However it is so normal for there to be a range and eventually they usually all catch up to one another, from working in child care I learned that those with older siblings usually talked less as the older sibling would talk for them sometimes :) I know reading to them helps lots and talking to them all day long about everything and anything! anyways it's okay she will be fine especially since she understands things by shaking her head etc.

Raychel - posted on 02/10/2011

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I'm glad I'm not the only one with a tod that doesn't say that many words...my son says puppy, mama, dada, apple, purple, uh oh, milk, more, finished, no, love you...he does more sign language than talking and thats because when he was going to daycare they worked with him on that.

We have started the potty training but I have my degree in child development and I have learned that most girls start at around 18-24 months to potty and boys are 22-36 months...I think as long as you are working with her than she will soon pick it up.

Sheri - posted on 02/10/2011

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Maybe my daughter is unusual to say around 15 words and putting 2 words together in a sentence that makes sense at 17 months...but if your daughter isn't really speaking at all I would suggest maybe taking her to get her hearing checked...maybe she is having a hard time hearing and therefore not speaking as much...could also be she is just shy? I don't know but I hope this may help.

Donna - posted on 02/10/2011

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My girl is 17 months and not saying much either, like your girl, says alot of words once, but not again. Words I can understand that she says daily are cat, no, whats that, and she says baboo ( I think balloon?) never says mum, ever! Occasionally dad though. She babbles alot in her own language, and also loves to dance and 'sing'. But I can't make any sense of what she is actually saying. She has no interest in repeating what I say, but understands what I say. Its frustrating. Im not going to bother with potty training until she can speak alot more.

Sadia - posted on 02/09/2011

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My daughter is saying quite alot of words & seems to be picking up new words all the time but I'm sure all babies r different. Have only started potty training afew days ago, sometime she goes n sometime she doesn't. I'm sure it's going to take a long time but I just want her to get into a routine of sitting on the potty. You just need to be patient it will take time. Good luck

Alexandra - posted on 02/09/2011

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Ya, No, mum, dada, bum, bath & bed are pretty much the extent of my 18 month old daughters vocabulary... She understands well, but doesn't seem interested in wanting to put much "effort" in verbalizing" right now...?

Andrea - posted on 02/09/2011

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My son is about to be 18 months in a few weeks and his vocabulary is quite limited. uh-oh, da (which applies to both dad and dog), no, go,don't, boom... not sure any of these are considered speaking really. he's not interested in the obvious ones like juice, milk, all done, up etc but he does understand when I talk to him and follows simple instructions so I'm not too worried. I've heard a few times that the second child is often a bit 'lazy' when it comes to speaking and doing things because they have an older sibling that does stuff and talks for them so they don't really have to?! As far as the potty training goes I don't have much experience yet but I think you have to find the humour if you can, it's a faze of some kind and eventually she'll figure it out. Try to stay patient and just keep nudging in the right direction, she'll figure it out soon enough... one day you'll be laughing with her as you tell her how difficult she was;-)

Gemma - posted on 02/09/2011

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my daughter says 3 words dada, no and hiya.I spend all the time talking to her and she is just not interested in trying to repeat. she dances a lot too infact when music gets played she starts shaking her bum . anyway i believe she will talk when she is ready, dont assume because your son did your daughter should remember EVEYONE IS DIFFERENT. as for the potty well mine secretly takes her nappy off and does her business wherever she pleases. all you can do is when you go for a wee take her with you or whenever she does sit on the potty applaud her for it.

Alicia - posted on 02/09/2011

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my daughter kinda talks. shes knows mom, dad, pizza, gracie (her name) nana, grandma, spongebob, lightning, no, yes, elmo, poop, sock, and shoe. weve been working on juice for a few months, but cant seem to get that one down. i was thinking about starting potty training soon, but shes my first and im kinda scared. but everytime we go in to the bathroom she takes her pants off!! good luck!

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