12 year old (Aspergers) and depression / violent thoughts

Elizabeth - posted on 04/23/2010

Thanks Erin! We have used a "reaction scale" before, which he helped create, and I will get that back out again.

April - posted on 04/23/2010

that is a GREAT idea!!! we will have to try this,,,

Erin - posted on 04/23/2010

I am an autism resource specialist, and it is true that those with asperger's often suffer from depression as well. However, it's also important to rremember that social interaction deficits play a major role in AS, and perhaps your son id dealing with a particularly sticky social situation. Cognitive behavioral approaches seem to be quite effective in dealing with violent or socially inappropriate talk. You might consider using an approach such as a 5 point scale with him to go over socially acceptable speech, then give him a place where it IS acceptable to express and work through these thoughts.

Colleen - posted on 04/22/2010

No advice really, but my son has Asperger's, Severe ADHD and just got diagnosed with Depression. My son was being bullied by a particular classmate and even though the kid was removed to another school, my son still has a deep hatred for this classmate. Make sure he is not being bullied by this classmate.

Elizabeth - posted on 04/22/2010

Karlien - I don't know much about CP, but with ASD issues, I have been told that hormones will make any of the symptoms worse. If you tell me what behaviors are concerning you, I'd be happy to try to help.

Christine - posted on 04/22/2010

My thought is, that you try to find out what is behind these thoughts. Like Lisa suggested in the first response, it may be that he is being teased or bullied by other students at school. Rather than put the blame on your son, I believe there is a need for the people doing the bullying to be talked to. Maybe if the class could do a study on people with disabilities or have explained to them what Aspergers is..........it could help them to understand better, and therefore, not bully as much. It's not fair that your child be put on medication for depression if it can be dealt with in a different and more educational manner.

April - posted on 04/22/2010

we went through something like this but not with so many words more action when ever wed dispine him he choke himself poke his figers in his eyes and tring to hurt himself we learned it was allrealed to communation anexity, id look in to anexity issues a starting point.. hope this helps..

Jacklin - posted on 04/22/2010

Definitely get them to a therapist for counseling. Food allergies?

Brownie - posted on 04/22/2010

My 13 year old expressed thoughts such as this at an early age and suffers from depression. I had her in therapy as soon as I saw this happen. I also work with her at home and drew her out with our pets. I know how she loves them and would also exhibit and voice her frustrations to them. They are a way for me to get her to express herself to me and let out so much that is bottled up inside of her.

Karlien - posted on 04/21/2010

Hi my daughter is 14 years old, she has always had some behaviour issues but lately its getting worse. She is on the Autism spectrum and has cerepal palsy...... I wish someone can help me?

Tracey - posted on 04/21/2010

Someting that works for my daughter (12, aspergres) is writing stories about her thoughts as she can be as violent as she likes in writing and it doesn't hurt anyone, but it also means I have written evidence about what goes through her mind to show any health professionals

Elizabeth - posted on 04/20/2010

Thanks Brenda & Lucille. We actually do use structured water (we spin it daily and the whole family drinks it since we moved away from the Mineral water in Texas) and had been under treatment with a DAN doctor for many years. I'll have to try harder to find one out here on the West Coast. Thanks again!

Lucille - posted on 04/20/2010

My son struggled with this and still does at times. We got him on a diet of vitamin and mineral supplements and it has made ALL the world of difference. May I suggest contacting a Defeat Autism Now physician in your area for a work up to find what might help your child. People have really noticed how it has helpted my son.
he went from numerous behavioral outbreaks at school K-6th to being on the B honor role with NO outbursts this year. I has been a God send for sure. Obviously not all kids react the same but it is worth the try. Oh and get rid of milk products....
Lucille

Brenda - posted on 04/20/2010

Hi Elizabeth :)
My son, Chris, 13, was just given a dx of aspergers last year by the school. He was dx pdd-nos with autistic tendencies at age 4. I had noticed that his behavior over the last couple of years was getting worse. We were trying alot of different methods in helping him deal with his frustration and nothing seemed to be working. Until I was introduced to Alkaline water. I was given free water for about 5 weeks, then I bought my own machine when I saw Chris was behaving better and communicating amazingly well within 3 weeks of him drinking this water. It has been a God send for me. I know we have people telling us about this miracle drug and that wonderful supplement, but I got to say this is the most amazing thing I have ever laid my hands on. Its only water, no chemical, medicine, nothing but restructured water. If you are interested, go to http://www.bweiss002.yourbodyiswater.inf... sign up for the free e-book and newsletter, you will be so glad you did. I know this will help :) Brenda

Elizabeth - posted on 04/19/2010

Thanks to everyone for your replies - we are working to get an appointment with a counselor, and I too have been told this is typical for Aspies, but it is not usual behavior for my kiddo. I appreciate all the different perspectives!

Jodie - posted on 04/19/2010

We have a doctors appointment in the morning, I certainly wont be waiting 4 months.

She assured me that she would never really harm herself, but the fact that she has mentioned it has raised alarms. Thanks susan

Susan - posted on 04/19/2010

my doctor has told me if there is an immediate danger of the child hurting self or others the best thing to do is take them to the er for mental health treatment a facility that handles children or a childrens hospital.. This way your child will be seen and the assesment can begin. don't wait 4 month if you feel there is an imediate concern that can be addressed ER treatment may be your only way in at this point.

Jodie - posted on 04/19/2010

My daughter is a 12yr old aspie. She has just recently threatened suicide and suffering major depression. I was warned when she was diagnosed in year 4 that she could suffer these symptoms. She wants to live with her dad, but I dont believe that she will recieve the correct treatment if I let her go. She is very much adored by myself, my husband, brother and little sister (who irritates her to no end). She has told me how much she despises me, which hurts so much. She hates me to tell her I love her and doesnt want me to touch her at all. she wont even look at me. I dont know what I have done other than love and try to help her. ( her threats towards me have been very frightening) Her threats have been very concerning, but I cant get her into the phsyciatrist for at least 4 months.

We cant wait this long as I believe she has a serious problem. She is on meds, but is not helping. I dont know whether or not to let her go to live at her dads. I would do whatever it takes if that will make her happy.

At times I feel very much alone, until I read other peoples experiences. Aspie children are a true gift as they are very talented, but can turn around and be very challanging.

I love my daughter so much and my fear is loosing her.

Tanya - posted on 04/19/2010

Yes, i have 2 children with aspergers, one with pdd, and 2 NT (neurotypical) I homeschool my children for this very reason. My 12 yr old with ASD was becoming very agressive, angry and more withdrawn about 2 yrs ago. Kids at school are cruel. Our kids face enough being able to survive the stimulation at school and an ever changing routine without malicious kids piping in. Schools say "0 tolerance" but it doesnt apply to our kids. Thi behavior is perfectly "normal" for our kids in these school situations. Talk with him, empathise with him. Dont blame him. Give him healthy alternatives for his frustration and get to the bottom of the bullying and put a stop to it or remove him from the situation !

Kim - posted on 04/19/2010

Hi, my son is sixteen and yes he has violent thoughts at times. When he was little we tried therapy.It wasn't very helpful for us. So, then I started educating myself thru books, other's experiences, and NAMI (National association of mental illness). In the end we found not only did depression cause these thoughts but, lack of sleep and even anger did. We decided to go with meds. This helps alot. Also, I found if my son wrote his thoughts on paper he could rip them up and throw them out. By doing this he could get them out of his head and believe or not this works. This way he wasn't worried about his thoughts. He could let them go. I also talk to him about staying positive the glass is half full versus the glass is half empty. Hope this helps! Kim

Susan - posted on 04/18/2010

We have been dealing with this with our child and the best thing to do is speak to your family doctor and seek out a psyciatric evaluation and treatment plan for him involve the family so you are all on the same page with it. It does not always mean medication but if that is recomemeded learn what you can about it and ask those in the medical profession, doctors and professional that work with mental health issues. Behavior therapy and medication can made a difference for your child. It helps and it does not have to be long tearm just to get through the teen years. better to do it now before the child starts finding ways to cope without professional guidence

Rowena - posted on 04/18/2010

I have to tell you that I know where you are coming from. My daughter is now a functioning adult that still needs guidence from time to time. I can only say from my experience, you will shed a lot of tears, but with patience, love and prayer your child should lead a pretty normal life. I'll keep you in my thoughts.

Carrie - posted on 04/17/2010

My son is not a preteen he is a 5 year old with aspergers ,but he has violant thoughts like ,he has told other children in his class he is going to kill them and bring his gun to school and he is absesed with bombs .He now gos to a child phsychologist and has been put on a medication . It seems to be helping.

Lisa - posted on 04/17/2010

My son is also 12 and has occasionally expressed some angry and violent thoughts about another student. I've discovered that when he's feeling that kind of anger, something else is often going on that he's not saying, After pressing him a bit, I often have found out that someone was, or had been, causing a problem for him. Usually mocking him, or taunting him in some way. At this age, it's clear to classmates that my kiddo isn't exactly "normal", it's made him a target.

I've always wondered if I should seek out some therapy for him, but his moods and actions haven't really been serious enough..

at least not yet. I've very recently been considering starting him in counseling or therapy as he's starting to have more and more behavior issues as a result of being picked on.



Good luck mama, I'm there with you!