can children with aspergers be happy and loving

Stefb79 - posted on 08/01/2011 ( 142 moms have responded )

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hi my 9 yr old son displays traits of aspergers i have done online tests and they say he could have it but when i asked an ADHD nurse she said he hasnt got it because he is happy and loving is this true?

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Jodi - posted on 08/02/2011

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i had to add, after reading the rest of the posts.

we had to really push my son's pediatrician to get him evaluated. he was convinced that my son was just quirky. (he was reading at 3.5) we assured the doctor that we wanted to be sure and it was kind of a mixed blessing- on one hand we new that there was something different about him on the other hand it isn't actually good news to learn that your child's on the spectrum.

for various reasons, my son didn't start treatments until he was almost 5 but the progress he's made in this one year has been amazing.

he also loves other kids, loves playing with other kids but doesn't know how to interact with them well. he's very outgoing, loves to laugh and has a great sense of humor but can be very rigid with how he plays.

there's a reason why it is called a spectrum disorder. it looks different in different kids. there are ways to help your son, socially. there are social groups that will help them work through what's appropriate for interacting.

get him evaluated and then look into getting him help. best of luck

Beth - posted on 10/06/2011

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I have a son with Aspergers and he will be 24!! on the 23rd of this month. He is very loving and affectionate with family and friends. He has had a few girlfriends, they love his affections but he does not socialize well so it does not last long mostly because the girls get embarrassed when in public with him. He has a tendency to say and do things that offend some people. Life goes on keep your chin up it will all work out

Carol - posted on 08/02/2011

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What a nice nurse. My son hasn't been diagnosed, but I'm 100% sure he has aspergers. He is very loving and caring. When he was little he used to kiss me so much I started counting one day - I stopped at over 100 and it wasn't even close to noon. Now he doesn't acknowledge me in public, but still kisses me goodnight and gives the occassional hug. He's very caring toward other kids if they're hurt or crying.
Don't rely on such a callous nurse. I'm curious - why isn't he diagnosed one way or another? My 10 year old isn't either and I'm wondering how important a diagnosis is. His doctor and the school counselor have said that a diagnosis isn't necessary since he's making good grades. We're just trying to help with the social aspect of his life.

Judi - posted on 06/11/2012

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Happy, loving almost to the extreme in this house, he may not say it every day but I know that my 6 yo boy loves me, cuddles me, needs me. Sometimes to the point where I need a break.

Danielle - posted on 12/31/2011

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NO! I have two children of five that have been diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome. One may be pushing Autism. Both are loving in their own little way. My daughter, that is pushing more towards Autism, is VERY affectionate and loving. But, can also be very very hateful when someone touches her things or does something "out of order" according to her. Mine are boy age 9(almost 10) and girl 6 1/2 yrs old. They also say that eye contact is a major factor. If they have eye contact, then noooooooo they don't have it. Well, I bed to differ. I think some things are "trained" and some are "habit". I have FORCED mine to make eye contact. Sometimes I have to say their name about 10 times before I get it, but I do get it. And eventually, the amount of times I have to say their name to get their attention reduces drastically. Really depends on the situation at hand or WHO is asking for their attention. If you think about it, they are very guarded with their "space". So wouldn't they WANT to look up to see who is "invading their space"??? Just my thoughts from what I have seen and experienced.
Here where I live, we have Easter Seals. I would highly reccommend finding a place that specializes in Autism/Asperger's and have them do an evaluation. Take your online printout with you. It is very helpful. Also, make a log, take video of behaviors, etc... All very helpful for the dr to see. :) Hope this helps!

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Kate - posted on 06/11/2012

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My son is autistic and he is happier and more loving than his siblings! Very affectionate boy. He's also empathetic which I was told( before his diagnosis of severe autism) he can't be if he has autism.
There used to be that misconception based on , I believe, the severely affected kids who couldn't show their feelings on their face or through actions, and the ones who sadly can't handle touch because it's painful. I could be wrong about their basis. But many people don't know much about autism unless it has personally touched their lives.
The best way to find out is through formal testing though.
good luck!

Rebecca - posted on 06/10/2012

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I just had another thought - know what I hate about the label of not loving and not happy? It could create extremes for the parent's situation and dictate how they treat their child. Not that many parents would stop showing love to their child however if they stopped hugging, kissing, expressing love for that child it could be disastrous in the end. I know that at the college level we need to watch our students with Aspergers for signs of extreme depression as their feeling (a challenge with people who generally hold back from reciprocity) of not being accepted, or not being right in their own skin...I think there are plenty of ladies on here who gladly disagree with your nurses comment, but just thought I would rant

Jennifer - posted on 06/10/2012

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my doctor seen my 5 yr old son about a year ago and he said straight out to me that he had autism, and he put him on risperidone tablets, it seems to control his meltdowns a little. but i seen him a few weeks ago and he told me that he dont think that he has it as he is to loving, and that people with it dont even know your in the room.

Heather - posted on 06/09/2012

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Yes children can be very affectionate,with Autisim.I have a daughter that just turned 7,I always knew something was very different with her,Yes lots of hugs and kisses to everyone,Early diagnose to me doesnt happen that much,Its been 1 whole school year,that we have been struggling to get her help all the symptoms are there,Here it is a huge process,It is more noticable to specilists,teachers,doctors,the older the child gets usually its noticable by grade 1.They dont like to jump to conculisions at a early age,They hope it is just a delay of some sort,Through the year,my child has been evaluated by phycoligist,doctor,speech therapist,social worker,and you know they say we suspect autisim disorder and mild retardation,but still they are not allowed to conclude the diagnosis,I got the news 2 weeks ago it will take about 1 to 2 years at the autisim clinic before my daughter will be able to be seen,its the referral to the autisim that got me the help we needed for now,cause the local team just didnt have enough information,as it stands now my child is recieving a tempory code from the school psycololigist cause she is on a waiting list that is the best news i heard in the last 2 weeks ,she will be recieving services and the proper tools for the new school year.it does have to do with grades my daughter learned nothing in a year with a regular school classroom she needs pictures to help her learn and the soicial aspect is a great issue,my child is in her little bubble at all times,As for my child it used to be she didnt want to socialize with other children now she wants to but is not accepted by other children,you seee its a totally different world with a child with autisim,Parents know best if you suspect it to be autisim you are probably right all the best to you sometimes you have to kick your feet!

Rebecca - posted on 06/08/2012

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I work with College-aged students that have aspergers and although generally I find they are very serious, they certainly can be happy...I just find from my research and with dealing with the students that I do they definitely are not long-term happy...does that make sense?

And that is crap that they don't necessarily want friends...they are human like everyone else and some people like to be alone without company, others don't...

I would seek another opinion though i know it can be hard to diagnose at this age...

Heather - posted on 06/06/2012

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No. My son is apergers, ADHD, and bi-polar. He is a very loving person and sometimes it can be very inappropriate. He is 23 now and I still have to remind him kissing and loving on me like a 5-7 year old is not acceptable.

I would take your son to a specialist and have them test him.

Sharon - posted on 06/05/2012

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Hi,
My name is Sharon and I been working with children who have autism for the past couple of years and they are happy and loving children. The problem with autistic children is that they have a hard time expressing how they are feeling because most of them lack ability to read social cues such as body language and facial expressions, but this does not say they can't be happy and loving children they just express it differently. For example, I work with a boy who is in cycle 3 and loves to give me a good by hug when I leave to go home from work along with saying have a good day.

Veronica - posted on 02/02/2012

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That doesn't mean anything! My son is autistic and is the happiest child you will meet! All ASD children are different. Please have him evaluated. Knowing is half the battle :)

C - posted on 02/02/2012

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My sister is 20 and has aspergers.. She can be loving and happy, sad and depressed, blank and mysterious, and clueless... I have learned that thier are months where certain asperger traits will be more obvious to me then the next month something differenet will be prominent.

Brenda - posted on 01/28/2012

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Yes they can! My son has AS and he is very loving toward his family and happy. I would seek another opinion.

Kirsty - posted on 01/28/2012

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my 12 yr old has just been diagnosed with aspergers after a 7yr battle,she is the most loving child i have ever known,it affects every child differently,u will find conflicting advice were ever u turn im afraid,good luck!

Jeannie - posted on 01/28/2012

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Trish your child sounds very much like mine. I am glad you pushed and got him the help he needs. Good luck to you.

Trish - posted on 01/28/2012

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Our 6 yr old son has recently been diagnosed with Austistic Spectrum Disorder, Aspergers. He is our 4th child and from when he was tiny my husband and I kept thinking, something is not quite right here. He had a lot of trouble with glue ear and had grommets put in his ears when he was 2 1/4, these helped a lot but still we had our queries and worries about his behaviour. We had to change his nursery school as he never settled well at the one his older sister's went to. He settled beautifully at his second one, which was a lot smaller, about 6 to 8 children. His teachers there were great and just as we were getting somewhere with him, he turned 4 and had to go to Reception at School. We continued to have difficulties with him not settling at all. We pleaded with the Head teacher to have him assessed by the Educational Psychologist, to no avail. Her only response was 'did we really want to label him?' Our reply was that we did not want to label him, we wanted to help him and the label ASD or Developmental delay were far better labels than 'Naughty Boy'. Despite her assertions that we were just overprotective parents and that he was overly attached to home... we finally managed to press through and got him seen by a child psychologist. In UK you ned a referral from school to have them assessed, so we finally asked the school nurse to refer him to the GP as she had seen his difficulties and so she did this for us and things progressed quickly from then on. Although the shcool reports always played everything down, thankfully the Child Psychologist said that as his parents we know him better and her opinion from our very first appointment was that he has Aspergers. After many months of meetings, forms, etc... we received his diagnosis.



The Head at his school is still of the opinion that because he is happy, loving, has an imagination, is very good at talking, brilliant at reading, pretty good at maths, that he is just a normal boy with a discipline problem - that we don't discipline him enough...



Our boy is very loving, can be overly loving with his friends as he doesn't know when to pull back, when enough is enough. He can also flip at the drop of a hat, especially when he hasn't understood something clearly and it seems like he is having a tantrum cos he can't have his own way.



His older sisters all show various symptoms of Autism. His 13 year old sister is top of her class, exceptionally bright, very loving but recently when we were talking about her cousins moving to Australia and she wants to move there too, was not that bothered about leaving her friends, there's always email and FB :D But when I said we'd have to leave her bunny and that bothered her! Our middle daughter doesn't show many symptoms but they are there. Our youngest daughter shows many symptoms and we are wondering if we should get a diagnosis for her.



We pushed for a diagnosis for our son as he was not coping in normal life, especially on the social aspect of it. Our 13 year old, although showing many signs of Autism, is coping with life. She is not very social but has friends. She has researched a lot about Autism, since her brother was diagnosed, and can see that she fits the diagnosis in many different ways. The Head of Lower School at her High School has been very understanding and agrees that a diagnosis is probably not necessary in her case, but he will keep the info in mind when they all deal with her. The difference between the High School teachers' attitudes and the Primary school one's attitudes is amazing, especially as our son just does not cope with many aspects of social life.



Our advice to you would be to take heart, your little boy will always be loved by you. Don't let negative opinions weigh too heavily with you, follow your heart and try and get him diagnosed - if only for your peace of mind. If he receives a diagnosis the school will have to take notice and learn to help him learn to deal with the problems he has. It can be an uphill battle but personally, we think it is worth every fight. Our son's SENCO, and teacher, at Primary are fantastic with him, it is just the Head and I am beginning to realise that her misguided opinion should not weigh too heavily on our minds. Try to weigh up the benefits of how a diagnosis may be helpful to him v not having a diagnosis. They will always be our lovely, happy, wonderful children - each with their own unique strengths and weaknesses.

Pamela - posted on 01/24/2012

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my son is also 9yrs old. and he has never been "officially" diagnosed with Aspberger's, but according to his teachers he has all of the signs. anyways, he has never been anything but loving and happy, but it comes in moods, sometimes he just wants you to leave him alone and let him do his own thing and then there are times when all he wants to do is tell you how much he loves you. so I don't think that you can decide that a child does or does not have the traits by simply seeing that he is happy, there are other factors to consider. Good luck with your little man!

Lisa - posted on 01/24/2012

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My 4 year old son is very loving and happy a lot of the time and he was diagnosed with ASD two weeks ago. I think you need to have a psychiatrist assess him; someone who works with children with ASD and who knows what it looks like.



Lyric is very sensitive to his dad's and my moods and will be aware if one of us is upset in any way. And he loves to give kisses and hugs at bed time. Lately, he has even been telling us he loves us when we're engaged in an activity he is enjoying.



Don't take medical advice from someone who is not qualified to give it. Seek a professional.

Kate - posted on 01/23/2012

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No way! my son is "textbook aspergers" and he is such a loving little man.

Rachel - posted on 01/23/2012

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my son has mild autism. he is VERY happy and loving. I suggest you see a specialist who deals solely with Autism. It is worth every cent. all the best.

Lisa - posted on 01/17/2012

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I have 2 children with Asperger's. One is naturally happy & loving. The other has a lot of emotional problems & was not happy from the day he was born. I think it has to do with personality, not whether or not they have Asperger's.

Mel - posted on 01/17/2012

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So untrue. My 7 year old son has Asperger's and he is always laughing is overly happy (most of the time) minus tantrums and is very loving. He is always telling me he loves me he cuddles and kisses me all the time, always wants to hold my hand.

He is more loving than my other 3.

Morgan - posted on 01/16/2012

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lol! thats crazy that a nurse would say such a thing..my son is 4 years old..diagnosed when he was 2 and what a loving and caring child he is ♥. I get told from his EA and teacher that he is sooo affectionate :) I would have to disagree on her comment..Good luck with diagnoses :)

Morgan - posted on 01/16/2012

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lol! thats crazy that a nurse would say such a thing..my son is 4 years old..diagnosed when he was 2 and what a loving and caring child he is ♥. I get told from his EA and teacher that he is sooo affectionate :) I would have to disagree on her comment..Good luck with diagnoses :)

Maria - posted on 01/14/2012

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A friend of mine was told by a doctor that it wasn't possible for her down's syndrome child to also have autism. How ridiculous! This was decades ago with a doctor who was an expert in a different field. She was later proven right, but she knew.



My 9 year-old fraternal twin boys are both on the spectrum, one with autism the other aspberger's. My aspberger's son is the "love sponge." He loves hugs and kisses and and seeks it our from family, mostly me. My other son needs it, but needs it on his terms. He knows that I will kiss him good night and is expecting it. And ironically when he is grouchy is when I know he really needs it. First I ask if he needs elephants (vestibular sensory input he does at school) swinging from his waist back and forth while I hang on to his hips. Once he feels better I ask if I can hug him. His answer is usually to hug me, and I hug him back.



I have also noticed that after school when he is grouchy he needs to sit next to me, in contact, side to side. Usually I'm reading and he's watching PBS. But it's like he needs to "plug in" to me.



Don't let other people tell you who your child is or isn't. If you have a true expert telling you, be sure that you ask enough questions to be convinced.

Jodi - posted on 01/14/2012

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Our son has Asperger's and he is five years old. After his fifth birthday was the first time he ever told me he loved me. It was such a strange emotion for me, I had gotten so used to knowing he loved me in his own way and not hearing it. Now he's all over me. He doesn't like long hugs or kisses on his face anywhere (wipe offs) are common, but we play games so I can sneak a few. He is exceptionally loving and caring, and mimics others, and yes even says things I think he feels he should. But he can also be mean and nasty. In the past two years he's told me he hates me, hates our family, wants to burn our house down, doesn't want to live with me, all because I said no to a pudding or no you cannot play in the pouring rain. He is learning to transition. There is no box for our children to go in. The Autism spectrum is wide open like everything else.

Tina - posted on 01/12/2012

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My son is 11 and is in his first year at secondary school. He was diagnosed with Aspergers at the age of 9. He is a very loving child and always has been, he has an exceptionally kind heart and a lovely nature. He does have difficulty reading social cues and I believe he often gets by through mimicry of others. He will say things he things are expected and until recently told me he loved me literally every 5 minutes throughout the day. He loves to have friends but doesn't really know how to interact - he is happiest when in the same room as his friends with them all playing on their individual nintendos. Having a diagnosis has been a positive thing for him in that he now has some understanding of why he thinks and feels as he does (he says he sometimes feels like a freak) and it has also encouraged some of his teachers to work harder to maintain his interest. He is lucky in that academically he is very bright which helps maintain the teachers interest.

I would suggest that you speak with your GP and get him referred to the childrens mental health services for diagnosis, be prepared for a wait. My nephew was diagnosed as having Aspergers at the age of 15 by which time it was too late for the support and help he had needed all the way through school. The sooner you are on the list the better for him. Good luck

Judith - posted on 01/10/2012

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As nice as this nurse was to tell your son was loving and happy, she didn't have an opened mind about Asperger. People are too stuck on stereotype and won't look out of the box. My son has Asperger and he is 7 years old now. He is very happy and he is the one looking for cuddles DAILY. He will not put his arm around me, but he will come and ask for a hug or cuddle. Every child, Asperger or not, is different. Some without Asperger don't want a hug and aren't happy, they are just being themselves. I know you might not want your child to have Asperger, but not all symptoms are in one child, and not one child has all the symptoms. If you need an answer to your worry (as to know if your son has Asperger) go seek the right help. This nurse was nice and trying to help you with her knowledge...... nobody knows everything. She isn't to blame ; )

Bonnie - posted on 01/04/2012

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My daughters psychiatrist told me my daughter didnt have it, because she wasnt "enough' of an introvert!! Took her to Kennedy Kreiger in Baltimore and found out different!

Bobbi-Jo - posted on 01/03/2012

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My son can be the sweetest most gentle kind child you've ever met and then at the blink of an eye turn into the meanest most wicked hurtful one. My child has high functioning Autism, bi-polar, ADHD and sensory intregration disorder. His mood can turn in an instant. My sons meanness and nastiness can be attributed partially to his bi-polar and sensory issues. There are so many catagories of Autism and PDD and a lot of them do not require being unhappy or unloving as a prerequisite to the diagnosis. Many children with Autism or PDD are very happy and loving and do not have anger issues. Whenever you do get a diagnosis make sure to get a second opinion to confirm everyone is on the same page.

Jeannie - posted on 01/02/2012

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Please stay far, far away from that nurse. She is critically, fatally ignorant. Yes, of course children with Aspergers can be happy and loving. Oy Vey! In fact, many are most of the time.

Melissa - posted on 12/30/2011

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My sons have autism and are two of the happiest go lucky most loving boys you will ever meet. You get hugs and kisses on command by my oldest and hugs from my youngest if he wants to. The children/teens we know with aspergers are some of the most honest kindest kids we know. The thing I have noticed about autism is there are sooo many different types that no two children are going to be alike. My sons are as opposite as night and day and seem to have different forms of autism.

Lydia - posted on 12/28/2011

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My 5 yr old daughter was diagnosed just a couple of weeks ago. She is very loving and affectionate we sometimes even have kissing wars (she of course always wins). I didnt have a clue that there was anything wrong with her until she started Kindergarden ( sne never went to preschool or daycare) and she was taking a long time to adjust as well as having several behavioral problems. So I got her tested on my own as well as the school did their own testing. As I was told as I am sure many of the parent that have posted each child is different so you can not base a diagnosis on a vanilla description of a problem it is better to go and see a physchologist. I think that although it is primarily her social skill that we need to work on having a diagnosis helps me to better understand why she does what she does as well as alert those around her what is going on so that they do not come to the wrong conclusion about her and treat her different becuase of their assumtions

Joan - posted on 12/27/2011

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How did you get him to stop hugging every one. My granddaughter does this and it can be very scary for us. We have had people get mad about her trying to hug them.

Deena - posted on 12/27/2011

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This is so not true!! My 11 year old son has Aspergers and is the most loving child and happy child! He also has tons of empathy which children on the spectrum are not suppose to have. A lot of times children with Asperger's or HFA are misdiagnosed with ADHD and the treatment for them are two different things! Go with your gut feeling! Mom's have intuition for a reason!

Deena

User - posted on 12/22/2011

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My son has Aspergers. He is very loving and affectionate, at times inappropriately so. Just because a child has social disabilities, does not mean that they don't have emotions, or that they can't express them!! The only way to "know" for sure is to have the school and yourself fill out the questionnaires that a psychologist/psychiatrist/neurologist gives you. Then you will know what you are dealing with.
Good luck!

Elizabeth - posted on 12/19/2011

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Joan and Others-
From my exerience working with Autistic children, keeping them in a routine is the key to controlling the meltdowns, using a picture schedule also helps alot even tho they are intellegent, these kids are highly visual learners. I have found some really great sites in my research. Google High Functioning Autisim and you will find a lot of resources. Autism Speaks has some great resources as well. I hope i have helped If you need more info let me know.

Joan - posted on 12/18/2011

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My 6 year old granddaughter was diagnosed with high functioning autism, adhd, insomnia and celiac. My daughter-in-law had to really push to get something done for her. She was in pre-k in a public school and we were told that she was just lazy. She is in ST, PT, OT, and sees a social worker for her temper and thoughts of the dark side. I home school her and she is very bright. I am having trouble making her mind. She does the tantrum thing stomping , kicking, throwing things. I am at the end of my rope with this. Any help would be appreciated.

Elizabeth - posted on 12/17/2011

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My 7 year old has recently been diagnoised with HFA, and she is very loving towards her father and I, I began noticing at 5 yrs old how immature she was and still wanting to act like a baby, and she would run on her tip toes, and go off and play by herself for hours. She just this past year began flapping her arms and I said that's it, I have to speak to her pediatrician. I have been very lucky her pedi has an ASPI son so she knew what I was talking about, we went thru all the written tests needed to ADHD and Aspberger's.
Luckily I work in a school with Autistic kiddos, so I can gather information, I knew what I needed to look for as for Red Flag's but its so different when its your own child, you don't want to believe your child can be different, especially if its your youngest.

User - posted on 12/15/2011

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My daughter was diagnosed with Aspergers and OCD, and she is extremely happy and loving, until things do not go her way. She fears transition, and has frequent melt downs, but when she's in a good mood, she is very happy and loving.

Kimberly - posted on 12/14/2011

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Hi, my son is 3 1/2. He is very happy and loving but has it. He was diagnosed by 2 different neurologists. He also has ADHD on top of it. We now have started medication for the ADHD because the behaviors from that were making everyone miserable. On any given day we do have some bad times but for the most part our son is happy and is loving us. We constantly remind him to give eye contact, give hugs and kisses and try to say "i love you". Our son can sign so he tries to do that instead of speaking. We have therapy 4 times a week to help also. I think the one thing our neuro told us is that each child is different, how one thing affects one child may not affect another child on the spectrum. I truly believe if a mother's intuition is telling you something is different/wrong to get it checked out.

Theresha - posted on 12/10/2011

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My son is so happy and very loving... he has ASD. He'll be 8 on Friday. For awhile he hugged everyone even strangers... yikes.

Shea - posted on 12/05/2011

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First of all & most importantly, the nurse should recognize that every child is an individual...and more importantly when your talking/asking about special needs, diagnosis, etc, it becomes even more important to address the individuality of the child. My daughter has autism, and is a very affection child, and one that seeks out conversation with others. Now, while this isnt "standard" for autism, it is HER autism, not anyone elses. What I would suggest is that you seek out an official diagnosis from a child behavior specialist. If you need help with a list of specialists near you, please dont hesitate to message me. Best of luck Stef :)

Aniesha - posted on 12/04/2011

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That's rubbish! Very uninformed nurse from the sounds of it. A friend of mine has a little boy who has asperger's and he is the sweetest, most loving little boy ever. The only difference is that he struggles with certain things that other kids his age might find easy. Asperger's doesn't make your child a monster! It just gives them different challenges. I used to teach piano to a 12 year old boy who had asperger's too, and I'd been teaching him for about 6 months before I even knew he had it! He was a great kid, he just had to do things in a certain way, which I was more than willing to accommodate. Get another opinion

Bonnie - posted on 12/04/2011

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My son is happy and loving, and he has high functioning autism, some may have placed that diagnosis along with aspergers. So yes, he can have it.

Julie - posted on 12/01/2011

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No, that is not true! My son has Asperger's. We knew from when he was about 2 but he wasn't diagnosed until age 7. He is very loving towards us and always has been very affectionate, but equally can be vile due to venting his frustrations about the World he struggles to understand. He can also be very happy, laugh lots and be a joy to be around. He gets excited about Christmas (to an extreme level) but is such a happy child at least 50% of the time, so do not believe anyone who says your son cannot have an autistic spectrum disorder because he is happy and loving! What an outrageous statement for a healthcare professional to be making and it just demonstrates how much ignorance there still is about these conditions!

Siri Shakti - posted on 11/30/2011

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Hello! I find her comment so funny. My daughter is 10, she has Aspergers, and she is the most loving and happy child I've ever met. She is super social and super creative. She stretches me to grow a lot, and with her education I've had to do home schooling. I could have kept her in but I saw that she needed more one on one, and a curriculum that would be creative and flexible. So to answer your question... Yes they can be! Hope that helps you.

Anna - posted on 11/26/2011

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Every case and every child is different. Especially when it comes to and disabilities like Autisim Spectrum Disorder.

I have a child in my class that is Autistic and he is wonderful and very helpful. He loves to play jokes on me, I know it is more difficult when it is your own. Just be their biggest advocate.

Lindsay - posted on 11/26/2011

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My oldest son is 12 with Aspergers. He is the most snugly, caring, & loving of my 4 children. He desires to have friends, however he has little (if any) social graces and just doesn't understand the unspoken rules of social edict. My son is generally happy, however he is anxious about not having friends and not fitting in (something he didn't seem to notice unlit he was about 11). I also have a daycare and have cared for 3 other aspergers children NONE of them were in the least bit cuddly with anyone, they were all however happy children, and with the exception of one of the children they did seem to care about others (maybe just not quite as openly or expressively as other children there age). For a nurse to tell you Asperian children can't be happy and loving was way off base.

Carol - As for the importance in having your child diagnosed or not that is really a case by case decision that each parent faces. I know I chose to NOT have my son diagnosed for quite some time. I now wish I had him diagnosed sooner because I ran into a wall with his school. At one point the school decided that my son didn't require any extra help because he was a straight A student and his social was not "affecting his ability to learn". Had he been diagnosed then I never would have lost his extras. But because he had no medical diagnosis when the school did cut backs my son was dropped from OT (he couldn't hold a pencil correctly), PT (he walks on his tip toes), & his social group. Now I am fighting a long battle to get those services back for him. He was on a wait list for over a year to be evaluated for a diagnosis. He has been diagnosed for just under a year now and we still don't have his programs into place, now we are told he's gone 2 years without them and did well so school doesn't see the need. Meanwhile my straight A student who looked forward to school days turned into a straight D student with no desire to go to school. As a parent who originally chose NOT to diagnose I caution you to be sure you weigh your decision very carefully.

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