can children with aspergers be happy and loving

Anna - posted on 11/26/2011

Every case and every child is different. Especially when it comes to and disabilities like Autisim Spectrum Disorder.

I have a child in my class that is Autistic and he is wonderful and very helpful. He loves to play jokes on me, I know it is more difficult when it is your own. Just be their biggest advocate.

Lindsay - posted on 11/26/2011

My oldest son is 12 with Aspergers. He is the most snugly, caring, & loving of my 4 children. He desires to have friends, however he has little (if any) social graces and just doesn't understand the unspoken rules of social edict. My son is generally happy, however he is anxious about not having friends and not fitting in (something he didn't seem to notice unlit he was about 11). I also have a daycare and have cared for 3 other aspergers children NONE of them were in the least bit cuddly with anyone, they were all however happy children, and with the exception of one of the children they did seem to care about others (maybe just not quite as openly or expressively as other children there age). For a nurse to tell you Asperian children can't be happy and loving was way off base.

Carol - As for the importance in having your child diagnosed or not that is really a case by case decision that each parent faces. I know I chose to NOT have my son diagnosed for quite some time. I now wish I had him diagnosed sooner because I ran into a wall with his school. At one point the school decided that my son didn't require any extra help because he was a straight A student and his social was not "affecting his ability to learn". Had he been diagnosed then I never would have lost his extras. But because he had no medical diagnosis when the school did cut backs my son was dropped from OT (he couldn't hold a pencil correctly), PT (he walks on his tip toes), & his social group. Now I am fighting a long battle to get those services back for him. He was on a wait list for over a year to be evaluated for a diagnosis. He has been diagnosed for just under a year now and we still don't have his programs into place, now we are told he's gone 2 years without them and did well so school doesn't see the need. Meanwhile my straight A student who looked forward to school days turned into a straight D student with no desire to go to school. As a parent who originally chose NOT to diagnose I caution you to be sure you weigh your decision very carefully.

Jessie - posted on 11/25/2011

The ADHD nurse should be thrown out of the profession. (And you can tell her I said so ;P). I hate it when health professionals are so ignorant. That's one of the largest stereotypes out there. My daughter is overwhelmingly outgoing and loving. Autism is a spectrum, and not all the kids with any one disorder display all of the characteristics. You should schedule formal testing for your son. In our state (Alabama) there are a few professional organizations that do this, but a little research about your area should help you figure out the right testing method/locale for you.

Ilene - posted on 11/19/2011

Sounds like my 8 year old. He is very caring and communicative to people he cares about. Very smart and thorough in his schoolwork. However, he walks around the schoolyard not talking to anyone. He isn't trying to make friends. We are currently in the diagnosis stage, but I'm pretty sure he has aspergers.

Courtney - posted on 11/19/2011

my son is 5 and half recently diagnosed with aspergers. he is and always has been loving, sometime too much at times :) there were periods though where he would NOT love on anyone but us (his parents) and other family members he would run from crying. So i believe it is just a myth as well. Not all kids are the same whether they are on the spectrum or not :) be glad he is loving :)

Laura - posted on 11/15/2011

Happy and loving yes but most often children get diagnosed with ADHD first before the Aspergers comes out

Elizabeth - posted on 11/14/2011

What an odd comment for a nurse to say. MANY Autistic children are very happy and friendly children. Even moderate to severely Autistic children are happy. Happiness is not a factor at all!
Please continue to research the issues you feel your child might have and get a proper evaluation from either the town or a private developmental Dr.
Best of luck!

Roxanne - posted on 11/13/2011

Thats crazy.. Our son is very happy and loving. They are little social butterflies. Just society doesn't get them. Hes wants nothing more than to have friends and play.

Linda - posted on 10/27/2011

OMG I am so sorry that any nurse would ever say any thing so silly....I am a RN and a mother of 12 year old twin girls one with Autism and one with Aspergers syndrom and even I would never give anybody an answer like that..... This nurse you refer to needs to do some research on these syndroms befor trying to give answers to parents Very Important questions. But believe me it wont be just nurses, doctors will say silly things like this allso some times...... I have had docs actually say to me are you sure Sarah has Autism cuz she makes eye contact or things like Sarah cant have autism cuz she hugs you,all of which is just crazy things to say and an example of people who just doesnt understand these desorders ( but think they do )but back to the question can these kids be happy and my answer is YES they can be very happy and they can be very sad allso and mad and so on and so on.....If I was you I would just say isnt it great my child is so happy and so loving cuz i Understand that there is alot of children on this spectrum that cant show these emotions,and yes my family is truely Blessed. Sorry this is so long but this kinda touched a nerve inside me cuz I truely understand what your expereincing. Good Luck and enjoy that happy,loving lttle boy of yours....

KATIE - posted on 10/26/2011

HI, First of all she should not be a nurse. second of course they can be caring and loving and happy. My best friends son has Aspergers, and he is one of the most caring loving happy kids I know he is now 13 and he loves people, animals, he is so caring, and so very smart. he does have social issues. but is doing well with that, there are many books to read that will help you with Aspergers. and It may sound funny but there is a movie called Adam about a man with Aspergers and also the show parenthood has a child with Aspergers that you can relate to very well. {you can get both on dvd} they are both great to watch and books are helpful but a diagnois is very important to make sure that your family and your child get the resources that are out there to help them and you through this. some may need meds to regulate behavior. some may not that is a personal choice, but there are support groups, special docotrs, therapists, and educations and social programs that are out there to help. Please check into it you will see the great deal of difference it makes.

Carrie - posted on 10/24/2011

OK I was a teacher bf I was a stay at home mom, and I can tell you for sure children with Autism and Aspergers can be affectionate and loving! Autism and Aspergers are a "spectrum" of sensory disorders. Meaning there are varied levels of each. We had a child who was actually autistic, mostly non-verbal or talked more robotic like (no offense just trying to explain), and he was very social and loving. He would often get very excited and laugh and clap. Just because they have aspergers or autism doesn't mean they cannot exhibit some levels of love. As a matter of fact we had a boy come to our church yesterday who was autistic and he even was being honery and trying to joke w/ his mom. (I'm also using autism bc they're on the same spectrum of disorders) Anyways, you can see a specialist if you need to, but if he's "functioning" well & not struggling in school, then you and his teachers are doing a fabulous job of accepting his differences and rolling with it! Great job mom that you've embraced him and given the chance to express himself! :) (Rain man had aspergers btw...usually highly intelligent esp in one area) Good luck!

Christina - posted on 10/22/2011

Both my autistic children are happy and loving...now! When we started this long journey, they were not happy children. They were miserable, stayed in their own little world, became very agitated if I tried to give them affection, ect.
The older autistic children get, and the less severe or higher functioning they get, they can be very happy and loving children. The key is to find the abnormality. Does your child notice when someone else is not reciprocating his affection (ie:hugging someone who clearly does not wish to be hugged and not able to pick up on the other person's body language?)
I think people forget that children/adults with autism are PEOPLE! Just because they are not neurologically typical does NOT mean they do not do things that the rest of us do. There are so many people who have autism and don't even know it.

Anke - posted on 10/20/2011

Hi, yes my son, who just turned 6 and was recently diagnosed with Asperger's, is very loving towards his family and friends, and very cuddly and affectionate. But he also has very fierce mood swings and meltdowns. His aggressive behaviour has got better as he got older, thankfully. He can be cuddly, but only when he wants to be. But he is a happy little guy most of the time, in his own little world a lot, but that little world seems to be a pretty good one! I wanted to say to Barbara Bodensiek- your son sounds so much like mine! Mine too, loves numbers, counting, dates, remembers everyone's birthdays, ages, does sums and multiplication in his head, also amazing memory, and fascinated with repetitive things like light switches, wheels spinning, etc. He also likes putting things in piles! He always has done that, arranging these really elaborate piles with toys, household items, pieces of paper, weird concoctions, and I have not often heard this sort of thing from other people. He also likes lining things up. Would love to hear more from you and your son!
Anke x

Christina - posted on 10/19/2011

I'm a psychology student and it's really important that everyone understand that no 2 children are the same. Some children are really just developmentally not there yet in the social department. I think it's important that if you think there is something psychologically wrong with your son that you get a referral to go to a pscyhiatrist and let them work with your son. Do not let a physical doctor diagnose your son because that is not what they are trained to do.

I wish you the best of luck for your lil guy and I hope that perhaps with encouragement from someone other than his family will help him to socialize more. Often times children do not respond well to parental encouragment but they will respond to outside resources.

I wouldn't be so quick to label your son (and I say this in a non confrontational way) just because there could be something else going on in school. Have you had him checked for any learning disabilities? Is he being bullied in school? Some of these issues could very well be the reason for your son not socializing and getting bad grades in school. Try to stay away from googling, and surfing the net to figure out what is wrong because often times you'll get incorrect information that could really be harmful to your son.

Essentially, if all of the questions have been answered and there is no reason for his behavior then yes, it would be reasonable to take him to a psychiatrist/psychologist but before you do so I hope you have exhausted all measures.

I hope this helped!

Christina

Anice - posted on 10/17/2011

yes kids with aspergers they are smart and loving i learn from my experience with my 10 yr old who has it i dont treat him like he is unlike other children i actually keep him above the odss of feeling its few things wrong with him i still let him feel regardless what is not right you stay with that loving caring attitude

Sarah - posted on 10/17/2011

My son is almost 5, he was diagnosed with SPD at 16 mos old and ADHD at 4 yrs old he was on Adderayl and it made things worse. he is loving and caring loves to give kisses and say i love you,.I have said since he was 3 that he had aspergers but his school says in FL you have to be 7 to be diagnosed! It is extremly frustrating to see him struggle with learning with making friends because he can be aggressive and when he gets over stimulated I have to remove him from the situation. even going to the library he cant sit in storytime. I am at a loss with these doctors, his teacher just says he has "quirks" i hope i am saying that right! lol sorry...

Lynn - posted on 10/14/2011

Yes they can...

Kelly - posted on 10/14/2011

Totally not true.... My daughter has Aspergers and she is overly loving. I had a neurologist tell me she couldn't have it because her iq was low. They are wrong!!! It took me years until she was in her teenage years to actually get diagnosed properly. See a different doctor get some more opinions. He is socially "ackward". My advice a mom's gut trumps one nurse.... I said she had it when she was 2--guess what I was right!! Don't quit keep going!!!

Amelia - posted on 10/11/2011

my son who has recently been diagnosed with aspergers is very loving ! but does struggle with his peers and also has horrendous melt downs ! one thing i will say is he has never kissed me , he would never entertain that right from being a toddler. he is convinced he will get germs, i wonder what will happen when he has a girlfriend ????

Amelia - posted on 10/11/2011

my son who has recently been diagnosed with aspergers is very loving ! but does struggle with his peers and also has horrendous melt downs ! one thing i will say is he has never kissed me , he would never entertain that right from being a toddler. he is convinced he will get germs, i wonder what will happen when he has a girlfriend ????

Kerry - posted on 10/10/2011

My 12 yr old son is mild-mod Autistic with sensory integration & speech development issues and he is almost always happy. Although, he is not very touchy/feely or affectionate (due to his sensory issues), he can be very loving with his comments and actions/gestures when he wants to be. But I agree with the others, you need to have him tested/evaluated by a prodessional to determine if he is on the spectrum or not. They will use certain standards & scoring in testing and evaluating him, instaed of making a generalized diagnosis based on their opinoin.

Chasity - posted on 10/10/2011

my daughter has high functioning autism and is happy and loving, and very affectionate, maybe to lovable and will give you eye contact when she feels :)

Jamie - posted on 10/10/2011

my son is happy and loving as long as someone isnt bringing him down.

Bobbi - posted on 10/07/2011

Please what ever you do, Do NOT use the internet or heaven forbid Wilkepedia to diagnose your child.... See the appropriate professional in your area/country... Wilkepedia gets it's information from the average person, not from professionals- so therefore it is subjective and not fact... When in doubt see your GP/Doctor or local Autism charity for advice and information...

Rosalie - posted on 10/07/2011

you really should go see a specialist in the field of that situation a nurse isnt your best bet although im not bad mouthing them just sayen and yes they are able to love and have it

Chris - posted on 10/06/2011

Just thought of something else...our school district can test and make soem determinations too. Check with your school administrators and see if they can help you.

Beth - posted on 10/06/2011

I have a son with Aspergers and he will be 24!! on the 23rd of this month. He is very loving and affectionate with family and friends. He has had a few girlfriends, they love his affections but he does not socialize well so it does not last long mostly because the girls get embarrassed when in public with him. He has a tendency to say and do things that offend some people. Life goes on keep your chin up it will all work out

Chris - posted on 10/06/2011

Oh my gosh...that was hard to read. That nurse is woefully misinformed. Most Asperger kids DESPERATELY want friends (mine included) but lack the social understanding that creates, drives and sustains friendship. My son is loving and adorable and all the rest. Kids on the spectrum are as different as other kids...personalities, frailties, desires, abilities...just like the rest of us. She needs training. Please get a different pediatrician and discuss your concerns with your son with them as whomever has this nurse as their aid is not up to date on this matter. Good luck. (BTW, been there-done that--10 years ago the first nurse we saw about our son said it must be our parenting....even though we have a ridiculously successful older son. Do the right thing and ADVOCATE for your son by getting him to a doctor who will listen.

Lisa - posted on 10/05/2011

My son would dance all the time and sing Barney songs non-stop, he had the most wonderful sense of humor! When he was in another room he would always say, “I love you mommy”, this would happen at least 100 times a day. He would cuddle with me all the time.
In school, every single teacher loved him. Parent teacher conferences would be awesome for me, never an issue with defiance or attitude. I had one teacher email me one time asking if he could go along on their family vacation and another teacher stop by my home with a Christmas present for him.
Diagnosed with Aspergers Syndrome in 2002 after many years of begging professionals for help he still was a loving caring child.
So this ADHD nurse thinks Aspergers kids are nasty and hateful? What cracker jack box did she pull her degree out of? I think she needs some training in Autism before she opens her word hole and diagnoses based on solely on her opinion.

Laura - posted on 10/04/2011

Yes they can, my son has ASD, and is extremely loving and empathetic to others feelings. It's just a typical.

Angela - posted on 10/03/2011

My child was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome at 2.5 years of age and we received all the Early Intervention my son qualified for. At present, my 8 year old boy is leading his school in a campaign to help the victims of the drought and disease that has ravaged East Africa (where we lived when he was born). It is obvious that they diagnosed him correctly, but through everything we do everyday in his life, he has learned to be empathetic and loving. Maybe your love has taught your son how to love.

That said... Though we can learn so much online, please don't let the internet diagnose him. He deserves more than that. Get an accurate diagnosis from an Autism clinic/doctor in your area. Spend the money to know for sure! And then spend your life savinga to get him the help he needs (should he need it). It will end all of your sleepless nights and you will be able to move forward in your life!

I wish your family all the best!

Kathy - posted on 10/01/2011

I have a three year old that is the same way he is been seen by a speciallist to get it diagnosed for sure they have even mentioned autism and possible hearing loss and yes he is very happy and loving he does have his moments where he will have what we call a shut down he gets frustrated do to little to no communication and he throws fits hits kicks screams but most of the time he is very loving towards us. When it comes to strangers he has a lot of anxiety and fear and is usually very clingy and cry's if we leave him.... I would definately get it checked out by a developmental specialist most hospitals have them and your pediatritian should be able to get you a referal if needed. It is definately something you want to catch and deal with to reduce stress on not only you but also him... I have been told it can also cause some educational issues as they get older as well.

Barbara - posted on 09/30/2011

My son was born with bilateral sensorineural hearing loss. He is a very loving kid with many friends. But, I have always worried that he may have something on the spectrum. He is a little math wiz. He can add numbers in his head quicker than an adult can. He can multiply. He is 7. He has an amazing memory. He remembers people's birthdays and schedhules. He is a sports nut. He never played with toys when he was a baby. He liked to put things in piles. He also went through a phase where we had to hold him up to a light switch so he could turn the lights on and off over and over again. They have been working with him in school on personal space. When he talks to another kid, he will practically be on top of them. He didn't really know how to initiate conversation, but has come a long way with therapy. He also doesn't like when there are changes in routine, but it's not to the point where it will affect our day. He's gotten a lot better with all of these things. The problem is, a lot of these spectrum disorders can mimic each other and his hearing loss obviously has an impact on his social skills. Sorry so long, but I am reading a book called "Look me in the eye." It's a memoir about a man who grew up with Asergers. He desperately wanted friends but had to learn how to act in order to make friends. It's a wonderful book. I am still reading it.

Audrey - posted on 09/29/2011

I don't believe this as I am raising my 9 year old grandson and he was diaganosed as haviving aspergers. and he is very loving in every way, he had problems as far as having friends , as he gets something on his mind and you can't divert him from it also he talks all the time on certain subjects that he is interested in school is very hard he has tss workers every day,behavior specialist , and two phycoligists (sp.) we now have him on concerta, and risperidone. plus a sleeping aid as when he sleeps his brain remains active , its not easy and it took along time to get a team of professionals on board and help us to determain what was going on , it's still early , we was warned he could become aggressive but as of late he is as I said a very loving and caring boy. audrey

Sam - posted on 09/28/2011

Most definately Stef ♥, I Have a 9 1/2 yr old Aspi and I am proud. He is smart, he is loving, he just sometimes does not understand others and how they express themselves. Why because, we are too complicated :) Life is simple and logical to them and average people like us just make things so damb complicated. I do encourage you to get an evaluation. Noah was disagnosed at 3 1/2 after a very long, trying, emotional, turbulant, volatile and frustrating 6months. But for his sake and ours, to have a decent opportunity at enjoying life I am glad he was. Yes it might be a label to some but for him it is more of an acceptance that it is ok to feel the way that he does, see the world in the magnifed way that he does and that nothing is impossible, it is just the world that fears difference. Good Luck

Riekie - posted on 09/27/2011

My son have some traits of Aspergers and of Autism and he is the most loving kid i know. He is 4 years old and loves to hug and kiss his little brother, me, his dad and everybody else in the family. Like Carol's little one he is very caring towards kiddies that is hurt or crying, he is not talking so its not always easy for him to make friends, however at his creche everybody knows him and he gets lots of hugs from the other kids. I sometimes think that there isnt enough research done in the matter but ill be honest and are only now learning more about aspergers and autism after not only accepting but also being at peace with the fact that my son has it.

Bobbi - posted on 09/27/2011

Samantha, Wow. thank you so much for the courage it took to admit that your professor was teaching the wrong information... Many wouldn't have done that. I am so glad that we debated the issue and something was learnt- that's a major positive in my book..
My sister is learning disabled and like you was told her whole life she can't, she wouldn't... ect.. unfortunately she believed them.. I wouldn't wish that for anyone else and believe that people - all people are Truly amazing and can surpass all expectations placed upon them, if they are believed in... Thanks again!

Samantha - posted on 09/26/2011

Bobbi, I don't want to argue either. I see your side completly. I talked with several students tonight at class, and we all came to the conclusion that it is wrong to say to there is no such thing as high functioning autism.

We talked with our professor and she was still in a bit of disagreement but when we pulled out the DSM definitions and criterion she seemed to be a bit startled that what she was teaching was indeed INCORRECT Information. I do not want to give incorrect information and I want students to learn to the best of their ability. I want students to succeed.

You are also right about intellegence. Again students and I also talked tonight. Most intellegence tests deal with verbal answers. Most not all, but most students with an ASD have a communication problem. It can hinder results on an IQ test so its not giving them just. I also have a Learning disabilty and was told my whole life, you can't, you won't, you will never. It made me the person I am today.

I am not trying to take away from her post but after discussing it with my class, we have come to realize some things we learned were Completely wrong.

Bobbi - posted on 09/26/2011

ok, again, I won't take up too much space on Stef's posting as it's unfair to her to debate with you Samantha, but I will make this point- that we do not really know all there is to know about Autism and Autistic spectrum Conditions ( we don't refer to it as a disorder in my home or workplace) yet, let's be honest and even with your master's degree and mine there is so much more to learn which is what I try to do and my son has taught me more then anything else- not to put his condition into a "box" and think that I know all there is to know, as he will continually surprise me and continues to surpass all expectations of him...

thank you also for posting the current definition of autistic Spectrum, which I am very aware of, but others may not have seen.



as for "no high functioning autism", I'm afraid you are wrong in this specific case as my son and many many others here in the UK are being diagnosed just that-" high functioning autistic spectrum". and that is just it, the more we learn, the specifics are altered and changed in the diagnosis, hence the new DSM coming 2012. We are just learning for example through brain imaging a little more why children on the spectrum often have difficulties with pronouns referring to themselves as "you" instead of "I" and a new theory has emerged from Philadelphia that a frontal-posterior underconnectivity possibly disrupts the concept of self.. my point is.. is that we are learning new things daily and the diagnosis process as well as what we understand autism/autistic spectrum and Aspergers to be will also change more from what we now know it to be.



And I will stand by my statement.. Autism has no bearing on intelligence- we now know it to be a spectrum with all levels on that spectrum of how much the child or person is affected by their autism/ASC/Aspergers (ie- "mild" to "severe") and in studies as well as speaking with those on the spectrum we now know that a person can be Severely affected by their autism, yet have above average intelligence- so consequentially their autism has no direct link to their intelligence. It is how they "express" their intelligence that is misunderstood. for example a person who was considered severely autistic and non verbal grows up to be a well known author/artist/musician and speaker- Donna Williams.



I also am not trying to argue in anyway, but rather sharing my truth and experience in life and work. I also have no issues or problems of any kind with those of a "lower IQ" or learning difficulties and don't really believe I led anyone to believe I do. If I have, I apologise, working closely, daily specifically with children on all "levels" of the spectrum for many years now I actually find it the most rewarding "job" I have ever had.

Samantha - posted on 09/26/2011

Also having 2 family members that range greatly in the ASD disorders I can see both sides of the arguement. I am sorry about playing devils advocate.

I have an uncle who is non-verbal and has Childhood Degenerative Disorder and then I have a brother who has Aspergers and a Genius IQ. So I have been around both. I am not trying to argue, just going by what I know, been taught, and been around.

BTW a below average IQ isn't anything to be upset about. there are people in our community everyday who have a below average IQ 79 or lower who you would never guess had one, because they are living and working in the community.

Samantha - posted on 09/26/2011

@Bobbi, What we have been taught in school is there is no "High Functioning autism" it is misdiagnosed is actually aspergers and aspergers can have a range just like Autism. I may be wrong. But I am just going by what I have been taught.

Samantha - posted on 09/26/2011

@Bobbi, according to the definition in all text and medical books as well as the DSM which is what doctors use to diagnos a condition or disability. A child with Aspergers does have a normal to above average IQ and Autism is normal to below average.
Well what we are taught in Master's programs in respected research universities is that it does have to do with IQ.
Only thing I have found not relating 100% to IQ
About 80% of the children with autism have an IQ below average (with most in
the mild ... Of the 20% with autism that have an average or above average IQ.
That is the only research I have found that states it is not 100% based on IQ. What is being taught to educators is wrong then I suppose. This is the definition that doctors use to diagnos it.

DSM IV-TR DIAGNOSTIC CRITERIA FOR AUTISTIC DISORDER
A diagnosis of autistic disorder is made when the following criteria from A, B, and C are all met.

A total of six (or more) items from (1), (2), and (3), with at least two from (1), and one each from (2) and (3):


Qualitative impairment in social interaction, as manifested by at least two of the following:
marked impairment in the use of multiple nonverbal behaviors such as eye-to-eye gaze, facial expression, body postures, and gestures to regulate social interaction
failure to develop peer relationships appropriate to developmental level
a lack of spontaneous seeking to share enjoyment, interests, or achievements with others (e.g., by a lack of showing, bringing, or pointing out objects of interest)
lack of social or emotional reciprocity

Qualitative impairments in communication as manifested by at least one of the following:
delay in, or total lack of, the development of spoken language (not accompanied by an attempt to compensate through alternative modes of communication such as gesture or mime)
in individuals with adequate speech, marked impairment in the ability to initiate or sustain a conversation with others
stereotyped and repetitive use of language or idiosyncratic language
lack of varied, spontaneous make-believe play or social imitative play appropriate to developmental level

Restricted, repetitive, and stereotyped patterns of behavior, interest, and activities, as manifested by at least one of the following:
encompassing preoccupation with one or more stereotyped and restricted patterns of interest that is abnormal either in intensity or focus
apparently inflexible adherence to specific, nonfunctional routines or rituals
stereotyped and repetitive motor mannerisms (e.g., hand or finger flapping or twisting, or complex whole-body movements)
persistent preoccupation with parts of objects

Delays or abnormal functioning in at least one of the following areas, with onset prior to age 3 years: (1) social interaction, (2) language as used in social communication, or (3) symbolic or imaginative play.

The disturbance is not better accounted for by Rett's Disorder or Childhood Disintegrative Disorder.

Bobbi - posted on 09/26/2011

yes, Adrienne, I so agree!!!! There are so many children diagnosed "autistic" and so many underestimate them... my son gets so angry when people think he's "stupid" as he puts it (underestimates his intelligence)...Glad to know someone understands!! :-)

Adrienne - posted on 09/26/2011

Thank you so much Bobbi. I also have a son with autism but a normal to high IQ. It is important that people understand this

Bobbi - posted on 09/26/2011

Sorry Samantha, I have to correct you. Not all children with autism have below average IQ's. Having autism has Nothing to do with "your" intelligence. Someone can have autism and have learning disabilities that lead them to have a lower IQ then "normal" , or they can actually have autism and have a higher then average IQ. Like my son. Someone can be greatly affected by their autism and yet have greater then average intelligence. Someone may not be so affected by their autism but have learning disabilities.. My son has Autistic spectrum, ADHD, PTSD and OCD with a higher then average IQ and consequentially one of the top of his year group. I just needed to clarify that.

The only difference between what is called "high Functioning" Autism and Aspergers is the age in which the child started speaking. If the child communicates "late" or with difficulties a diagnosis of HF Autistic Spectrum is given.. If no communication "difficulties" are present in so far as the child speaks/ communicates as per developmental "milestone"...the a diagnosis of aspergers was given. Both autism and aspergers are diagnosed based on the "triad of impairments"- ie- the 3 areas of difficulties that lead to the diagnosis ( communication/language, social/emotional and flexibility of thought- so the Conditions are the same in so far as the areas affected.)
in fact Aspergers will become apart of the Autistic spectrum condition diagnosis shortly in the new DSM....

But for those like my son, it is really important for you to understand that just because he has autism does not mean he has a lower IQ and in fact many many others like him have higher IQ's then average... Having autism does not dictate your intelligence by any means...

Samantha - posted on 09/25/2011

yes with aspergers a child has a normal to above average IQ with autism it is a below average IQ.I have a degree in special education. My brother who has a genius IQ also has aspergers he is loving and happy. They just don't pick up on social ques or understand why they cannot do certain things in public.

Kristine - posted on 09/24/2011

My son was just diagnosed with PDDNOS and is mostly going to get the diagnosis changed after he has is IQ test to Aspergers. He is such a happy and loving little boy. Every child is different, but trust your instincts and have him tested.

Cindi - posted on 09/23/2011

My oldest is 9 & has Aspergers, & he is very happy & very loving! She isn't a doc & doesn't have a clue about it. she is just a informed nurse. They are happy in their own way, they may show it differently, but then again so does every body else. Of course he can be loving, & every body has their own ways of showing it. I'm sorry that upsets me. I think people are stuck in the T.V. way of how all these different mental things should or shouldn't be.

Rebecca - posted on 09/22/2011

my son is 5 and he has adhd and he also has aspergers and to your question yes my son is happy i mean dont get me wrong he has his off days where he doesnt want to be bothered with but other than that he is happy if you want to find out if he is go to an autism center and they will do the test and it is worth it if you call his doctor and say you think he might have it they should set you up with the right people to call so he can get tested good luck

Sandra - posted on 09/21/2011

Yes they can, I work with them. It is harder for them but it is up to the adult to always insist on affection. Or at least try to offer it. I have always been really loved by my autistic students they have hugged me and told me they love me many of times. It takes time but it is possible. I always make sure to say hi to my autistic students even if it appears they are not paying attention, they desirve the same attention and affection that others do.