Haircuts???

Jennifer - posted on 02/13/2009

From what I gather, haircuts PHYSICALLY hurt. It doesn't make sense to your or I, maybe, but think about it...children on the spectrum 99% of the time have a sensory disorder to go along with it. If you can, allow your child to let it grow longer in the winter and try to maybe keep it shorter in the summer, and cut off as much as possible in one shot. One other thing comes to mind is that, since it can be painful, your child probably has some tactile issues going on. Look into an OT certified in sensory integration. Good luck!

Sue - posted on 02/13/2009

I used to have to hold my son...took a lot of strength. There was only one place in town that would cut his hair. They were very patient with us. Just when I thought I wasn't going to be able to hold on to him any longer, he was fine. Now we have no problems and he asks for his hair cut when he feels it's getting too long. Our best results were when the girls would cut his hair over the sink. He could play with the water while they cut. The girls would try to throw the hair aside instead of letting fall in the sink, that way he wasn't distracted by it. Good luck and have patience. I had a hard time believing that it would get better like they told me, but it did, poof...just like that. He was 6, close to 7.

LINDY - posted on 02/12/2009

Quoting Debbie:

i used to give them to him when he was sleeping and then graduated to in the kitchen (he's 10 now).  but i did notice wherever hair fell onto his skin was getting red and irritated.  i put a turtleneck on him and he goes to the barber just fine now.  the little hairs were causing problems and when i covered him up the issue around haircuts went away.  my friend uses a 'flow be'...not sure if i spelled that right.

HI debbie my name is lindy i have a three year old with autism and had huge problems cutting his hair i just wanted to say a BIG THANK YOU  debbie i owe you big time i did what you said and put a long sleeved shirt on my son ethan and bent him over my leg and tried not to get any hair on him it was like magic no cryin or kicking it was only at the end when i did at the back of his neck did he cry out but not like before i cant thank you enough :)

Leah - posted on 02/10/2009

i use clippers at home, although my son who has aspergers used to flinch and pull away, i think he was scared as he didnt know what was going and didnt like the sound in his ears.i let him see the clippers and put it on his hand so he could feel and see what was happening once he saw it wasnt going to hurt or cut him he was ok, now he just laughs because it tickles, although he still dosnt like having his hair cut.

Mary - posted on 02/10/2009

We skipped the kid places after everyone looked at us like we were killing our kid by getting his haircut. We found a lady with quiet clippers & its not nearly as bad. He still hates the water & hair on his face but its less dramatic.

Jennifer - posted on 02/10/2009

It's almost as if they have nerve endings in their hair!!

Jodi - posted on 02/06/2009

Hi, my son just got his first "real" hair cut at the age of 6. It was a very tramaic event for him in the past. I read books, took him to the salon, and practiced at home for years, hoping he would become comfortable with it. Finally one day at the salon, he wanted to sit in the chair and get his hair cut!! The lady let him pick out the cape and everything. It was a big step for him. Good luck and don't give up!!!!

Theresa - posted on 02/06/2009

The first time we tried to get Kari's hair cut (she was 2 1/2 I think) at a hairdressers she totally flipped out and I ended up taking her home with 1/2 a cut. After that my mom would come and cut her hair and she was fine with that. My mom was 3 hours away and would visit once a month so it worked great. In 2007 we moved and she is now 10 hours away (she sees the girls twice a year) so we had to try the salon again. By then Kari was 5 1/2 and actually did quite well - we have been there twice now.

I never really thought much about her being sensitive to haircuts and having her head touched until very recently (she will be scheduled for an evaluation at school soon).

Sandy - posted on 02/06/2009

Brushing teeth is just as bad but we found that if you make it a regular thing every day at the same time, it just becomes his regular routine and regular schedules work great on Dominic(I am an orthodontic asst and this killed me he had several caps on his teeth for that reason)

Saadya - posted on 02/06/2009

I do trim my son's hair when he falls asleep. He is 3, so it might be a little easier. If the child is older, try and use the words "trim" not "cut" when approaching the subject. Maybe give a special treat during or after. Maybe he could watch his favorite movie while its happening. idk... hope to have helped!
xoxo

Brandie - posted on 02/06/2009

Quoting Sandy:

sorry I am new to this but if he likes showers or baths try doing it in the tub so he ca rinse off the hair as soon as it falls on him or use a baby pool for the same thing with a hose...It always used to work on my little guy and he loves water!

thats what i had to do with my son.. he played in the tub while i cut. one snip at a time yes it took forever and   yes it made a horriable mess in the tub, and i had to drain the tub and rince him off aftreward. but he didnt seem to mind so much. he accualy liked playing with the bits of hair floating in the water ( try to catch  as much of it as you can and chuck in the garbage, but you will not get it  all lol) after a few times i would put him in the tub while it was still running and cut then. after a bit like that, i would turn on the water and sit him on the toilet of a chair and cut his hair while running his bath. gl

Renee - posted on 02/05/2009

Hi Brooke my son Hayden 5 has PDD he never liked haircuts. Until we realised he dosn't like the noise off the clippers and the scissors. He was like this for 3 and a half years. Now we have found an orsum male hairdresser who uses beard trimmers around his ears an back of his neck they're not that noisy.It does get better ,now Hayden likes it coz he knows he'll get spikey hair with gel in the end. It helps if the hairdresser is understanding to the child also....A lollipop at the same time dosn;t hurt either!! Good-Luck :-)

Jennifer - posted on 02/05/2009

I take my son to a child haircut place. They have little cars, planes etc for them to sit in. We always go to the same place and have the same lady. I also used a therapy brush to brush his hair anytime I could to get him use to having his head touched. He would throw up on the lady when we first started to go. Now he likes it ( a year later) and will ask to go.

Sharon - posted on 02/05/2009

Hi, we have terrible, terrible trouble with this, my husband and I, do the best we can by holding him in a large towel unfortunately I do still take a kicking!! I have the same problem with nail cutting? School has been extremely helpful!!  also what I do is try to cut it every 2 weeks so it doesnt get too long and he has a number 4 all over....

Maureen - posted on 02/05/2009

I also have trouble with my son Archie who is 5. He hates any touching of his head, consequently I have major trouble with teeth brushing, hair washing and haircuts. I'd love any suggestions. Thanks.

Brenda - posted on 02/04/2009

I cut my son's (almost 4 years old - nonverbal) hair myself and invested in the ultraquiet clippers....those are much less disturbing for him.   I put him in a chair that he can be buckled into...turn on a favorite video (one that I know he'll totally get sucked into) and try to do it quickly.  He still trys to wipe the clippers away, but he doesn't get upset.  I did start to notice though that on the days I would cut his hair (I'd always cut it before bathtime at night so he could go straight into the tub) he would wake up in the middle of the night and be up until morning.  Anyway, turns out it was because of the haircuts...sensory issue.  The solution was to give his haircuts in the morning...then he has all day to recover sensory wise. 

Brenda - posted on 02/04/2009

I cut my son's (almost 4 years old - nonverbal) hair myself and invested in the ultraquiet clippers....those are much less disturbing for him.   I put him in a chair that he can be buckled into...turn on a favorite video (one that I know he'll totally get sucked into) and try to do it quickly.  He still trys to wipe the clippers away, but he doesn't get upset.  I did start to notice though that on the days I would cut his hair (I'd always cut it before bathtime at night so he could go straight into the tub) he would wake up in the middle of the night and be up until morning.  Anyway, turns out it was because of the haircuts...sensory issue.  The solution was to give his haircuts in the morning...then he has all day to recover sensory wise. 

Sandy - posted on 02/04/2009

sorry I am new to this but if he likes showers or baths try doing it in the tub so he ca rinse off the hair as soon as it falls on him or use a baby pool for the same thing with a hose...It always used to work on my little guy and he loves water!

Jennifer - posted on 02/04/2009

My son had serious issues with haircuts so my sister would do them with scissors because that was the only thing that would stop the meltdowns. We ended up having to finally take him to a barber because my son was too hard for her to do anymore as she was big and pregnant and he had a tendency to throw his head back into her stomach. That last trip made all the difference. This was a barber shop and they had much quieter clippers than any of the other times. He fussed but by the end realized it didn't hurt his ears and she wasn't going to cut him so the next time he hesitantly went in. That time my husband went first and he decided to get it cut like my husband. I cried when I saw how short it was but was so pleased at how well my son had handled it. Now he actually asks to go to the barber shop. It was the quiet clippers and time that made all the difference.

Jennifer - posted on 02/04/2009

My friend is a hairdresser and she comes to my house to cut merlin's hair- we put on his favorite video and have him sit in the highchair- this takes time but has been amazingly successful!! It has been particularly challenging because he shakes his head alot but if you find someone who is talented and patient it shouls do the trick (at least I hope)!

Gwen - posted on 02/04/2009

It used to be hard to give him my son a hair cut.  My dad has this thing that boys needs short hair.  So he used to cut his hair.  My son used to cry and scream.   He wasn't afraid of the clippers, but later on around 3 he started getting afraid of anything that vibrated.  If the clippers got near he would say, "No", and run away. So scissors were used. 

We started taking him to the barber and specifically ask the barber to cut his hair with scissors, not clippers.  He would also tell the barber, "Only scissors please."

Finally, last year when he was 5, he allowed me to cut his hair with the clippers. This is what I did...

My mom bought him a vibrating toothbrush.  He didn't mind the vibrations of the toothbrush.  Since I knew he liked his toothbrush I would help him brush his teeth.  With a dry old  vibrating toothbrush on I would gently brush the outside of his cheeks, and asked him if it tickled.  Then I would try the nose, the forehead & the finally the head.  Then the first day he allowed me to cut his hair felt like a big accomplishment.   I told him as a treat for letting me cut his hair, I would give him $20 to go and buy something at Build-A-Bear.   I don't have to take him to a barber anymore...that's saves me $20 per visit + tip.  So that day instead of going to the barber and pay, I gave him the money and we went shopping.

Now, we don't have any more problems and I don't have to give him a treat.  Whenever his dad gets a hair cut, so does he.

Good luck.

Sarah - posted on 02/04/2009

My son (now 16) couldn't handle haircuts, so we used a weight vest on him. If you don't know - a weight vest is a vest that has weights inside of it to put pressure on his shoulders and chest. It was the only way that we could get through the cuts for quite a few years. The vest would calm him down and now, he enjoys going to the salon.

Gayle - posted on 02/04/2009

Quoting Alicia:

I also cut  my husbands hair and the buzzing thing on daddy facinates him.. So he's not afraid of the buzzing, but I still usually have about a 2-3 minute window. I use the longest attachment for the top and the next one down on the sides and back.

I also cut my husbands hair, we picked up this hair trimmer with many attachments for hair lengths.  My grandson is amused by it and in the summer I put a long extension cord on it and follow him around the yard cutting his hair.   It works beautifully!

Lea - posted on 01/23/2009

Quoting Brooke:

Haircuts???

My son and know of others have huge trouble when it comes to haircuts. any suggestions?

My ADHD/Asperger/PDD/ODD 13 yr old son still hates haircuts, won't let them near him with scissors unless they put the comb through hair and cuts along the comb.  He prefers the shearers and don't get to close to his ears. (Someone once nipped his ear)  To make matters worse, he has a slight "tick" from the medication and plays with his hair.  Started off feeling his "hair bumps" to rubbing it right off of his head to make a small bald spot.  A teacher at school informed us of the bald spot or we would have never known.  We new about him rubbing his head but didn't know how bad it got.  So unfortunately, those are the only suggestions above that I have to offer if you haven't tried them yet. His wrap around therapists don't think he'll every outgrow this type of behavior, they're just helping us to deal with him with it.  Oh well, such is life.

Gemma - posted on 01/22/2009

Hi my son might have aspergers and he does not like his hair cut. I have never tried a hair salon. I think he would flip out. I find that he does not mind me cutting his hair as much. He is also a lot calmer when using sissors. I also have to bribe him with sweets. Hope this might work for you. Good luck.

Justine - posted on 01/22/2009

Hello :)
My son has huge sensory issues with his head/ears.
Haircuts have always been a nightmare.
I gave up going to the salon as it was way too traumatic for everyone involved.
I came up with a trick with Logan where i spike his hair up with hair gel and chop all of the ends off.
He generally has it spiked so you don't notice if it isn't a perfect job.
He also gets some mini m&ms which he likes to line up, place in colour order and eat which keeps his mind on something else for a while.
He still protests and isn't keen on it, but this works well for us and keeps it under control!
Good luck :)

JoAnn - posted on 01/22/2009

My son had the same problem. He stopped getting upset when he was 4 1/2 years old. We explained step by step what would happen - shears on sides, scissors used on top. Now he tells me exactly what tools he wants the lady to use and tells her. It gives him some control. He also tells her when it is hurting him. I hope this helps.

Laura - posted on 01/21/2009

My son is 9 and has always had trouble with haircuts. Recently I have discovered that if he has a lollie pop or other type of hard candy in his mouth he is much calmer and cooperative.

Angela - posted on 01/21/2009

My son use to be horrible for a few years when it came to haircuts. Part of what I did was I started calling them "TRIMS" instead of "HAIRCUTS". I was wondering if he was taking the word CUT too literally. So now I tell him I am going to "TRIM" his hair. Also, he seemed to stop when I let my mom cut his hair, and she talked to him while she did it and promised to take him to Wal-Mart for a prize. He sat and she took him. From that time on, he's been fine. He does still like to move his head a tad more than most , but it is to the point that I can actually trim his hair myself now. Knowing what I know now, I can understand why he would scream with haircuts. His head was probably very sensitive, and I didn't understand that. Now I do, and if he starts getting uncomfortable I know what to do to soothe him. Hope this helps.

Lisa - posted on 01/21/2009

my son loves his nintendo ds. as long as the stylist doesnt block his vision or use clippers he sits fine as long as he can play his game.

Brooke - posted on 01/20/2009

yeah i do my hubby's, and his older brothers hair all 3 at the same time, just cant settle him. but i will try next time in front of a dvd or computer

Kristina - posted on 01/20/2009

I have a 12yr old that is just now letting other people cut his hair. Like most I have been cutting his hair at home for the last several years. I know that a lot of moms said that they didn't like the buzz cut but that was best for us in so many ways. I started cutting his hair about every 2 months so that it didn't take nearly as long. His issue was the noise, feel, heat, and the chance that he might get nicked. He did learn that if he sat still it wasn't as bad. We even did his dad's hair several times to get him to let me cut his hair.

Carrie - posted on 01/20/2009

My son only got half a hair cut the first time because he was crying so hard we thought he would throw up.  We took him back the next day and did the second half, after which he got a lolly pop.  He cried a little less each time until he finally put up with it.  He doesn't get much candy so the lolly pop was a great incentive.  I also always bring a shirt to change him into right after and ten we go straight home and take a shower.

Carrie - posted on 01/20/2009

My son only got half a hair cut the first time because he was crying so hard we thought he would throw up.  We took him back the next day and did the second half, after which he got a lolly pop.  He cried a little less each time until he finally put up with it.  He doesn't get much candy so the lolly pop was a great incentive.  I also always bring a shirt to change him into right after and ten we go straight home and take a shower.

Debbie - posted on 01/20/2009

i used to give them to him when he was sleeping and then graduated to in the kitchen (he's 10 now).  but i did notice wherever hair fell onto his skin was getting red and irritated.  i put a turtleneck on him and he goes to the barber just fine now.  the little hairs were causing problems and when i covered him up the issue around haircuts went away.  my friend uses a 'flow be'...not sure if i spelled that right.

Lenni - posted on 01/20/2009

my son has autism and he don't like getting his haircut

Lauren - posted on 01/20/2009

Haircuts can be scary!! i take my daughter to a children's hair saoln where they are used to cutting toddlers' hair- my daughter is 3 and will try to grab the scissors but somehow the hair dressers there know how to do it fast and with me holding her hands it goes okay. The salon is called Snip-Its, maybe there is one near you or a place like it?

HTH!

~Lauren

Amanda - posted on 01/20/2009

Some hairdessers will come to your home so it is more comfortable. Ask around and find out.

Theresa - posted on 01/20/2009

HAIRCUTS are a big issue with us as well. My son is 12yrs old; he has Down Syndrome and also ASD.. We do the hair cut at home thing too and it usually results to a quick buzz, and I hate that! My husband is usually the one that does the cut because he has a more calming effect to William. Afterwards, no matter how horrible the experience was he is rewarded with a shake. That is his most favorite thing in the whole wide world. Glad to know I'm not alone in the world with the same problem. :-)

Brooke - posted on 01/20/2009

my son really loves his computer so it may be an potion but i think he will freak because he hates people interupting his game lol

Brooke - posted on 01/20/2009

janine that is such a great idea i really wish they had a salon like that here ive lived in sydney and now in brisbane, never seen one like it. maybe a new business venture lol

Suzanne - posted on 01/20/2009

We had a difficult time with haircuts for quite awhile - I cut my son's hair at home.  What has been extremely successful has been to do the haircut in front of the tv or the computer - now I am finally able to do it and am done before he even notices.

Candy - posted on 01/20/2009

So funny you asked that question. Thats when we first figured out somthing was not quiet right with our son. HE HATES HAVING HIS HAIR CUT!!!! He is now 12 and is a lot better about it. He wouldn't pitch a fit or anything he just would cry when we had to go. So I started cutting his hair and did that for about 8 years. He now knows that it takes me much longer than it takes at the barber. Good luck , I know I always hated that trip!!!

Alicia - posted on 01/20/2009

Another note.. M&M's worked a few at a time keeping him occupied, but now we avoid all sugar maybe not an option for you either?

Alicia - posted on 01/20/2009

I also cut  my husbands hair and the buzzing thing on daddy facinates him.. So he's not afraid of the buzzing, but I still usually have about a 2-3 minute window. I use the longest attachment for the top and the next one down on the sides and back.

Monica - posted on 01/20/2009

I have the same problem my son is 4 and had autism, i normally cut his hair at home but took him to the hairdressers (big mistake) he just cried and screamed. So try doing it at home good luck :-)

Janet - posted on 01/20/2009

Haircuts were a NIGHTMARE! I would go months between cuts because I was trying to avoid being embarassed. I hated it, he hated it. My husband would freak out because he was embarassed. It was awful I found a lady who cuts hair in her home and she would start coming to my house to cut his hair. I put him in front of the computer with a game or something to play, and she would cut away. He hated having the area around his ears being cut. That was about 3 years ago--he's 8 now. We went from three people holding him down and one person cutting hair, to just someone cutting hair. Finind what works is the key--occupying their attention always helps.

Catherine - posted on 01/20/2009

I actually have a 10 year old son with ASD but he is severe. It does take time and with candy I use to just reinforce him to move his head to a specific spot so the hair dressor had an easier time. Though I avoid the kiddie places because the noise and too many colors, the amount of distractions in a kiddie place just over stimulates my son. Which makes go into full tantrum.

Now I have wean him to the point that I just say good job every 5 minutes to reinforce him sitting and staying still. I reward him at the end with a Mc Donald trip or to the playground. Something he really enjoys. I hope this helps.

Janine - posted on 01/20/2009

I go to a kiddies hairdresser and there is a playpark in the same centre. My son loves riding on the train so I promise him rides on the train if he sits through the cut. This works as long as the cut does not take too long and the hairdresser must use scizzors - not clippers. There are also televisions in front of each chair playing kiddie things like Barney etc. which helps.

Kerry - posted on 01/20/2009

I wonder if it might be the mirrors at the salons that set some of these guys off? I had more luck at home to cut the hair.  I would drag them into the local salon, let them play in the vibrating massage chair at the basin, then the hairdresser who was the same every time, would quickly and calmly use the scissors without trying to get them to turn or move too much.  She became super fast.  I would get a wedge style and the next time a hair cut was due there was still a clear line from when the hairdresser did it and i could follow that. so every second cut was at home until the kids were around 14 and asked to go to the hairdresser (wanted to be a little bit trendy bu then)

At home i would stand them naked in the bathtub and use the sharpest scissors i had. then when we were finished they could get straight into the shower and wash it out.  The second they got annoyed or started to argue i would stop and say "okay thats enough them. im not finished so if you continue to argue you can go to school looking stupid with half a haircut" Its not hurting you really, hair is like fingernails and will grow back, it doesnt hurt it to cut it, but it does keep it from smelling and getting hot on your head.

one of my 3 keeps his hair clipper length, and because we made it a fun game when he ws little he is ok about it but must shower immediatly.  The other 2 are growing theirs long.  Now days i use a mobile hairdresser and they have fun when she comes and giggle at her english accent.  She is very good at deciphering what it is they want the hair to look like when she is finished.