Helping my child with disablities make friends.

Connie - posted on 10/12/2010 ( 6 moms have responded )

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My son Spencer is 9 years old and he has PDD,anxiety disorder,sensory problems,and ADHD. I have such a hard time finding friends for him and us because people do not understand his issues. I would love to find some kids for him to play with along with some families that are dealing with some of the same things that we are. We live in West Bend and would love to find some nice friends for Spencer who can understand how he feels. If there are people out there in the same sittuation that I am please let me know how you go about finding friends for both you and your child. Spencer is a sweet kid he just thinks different than a normal child does.

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SomeRandomMother - posted on 07/14/2011

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Dude is 11 and this year we have had a friendship break through! We moved a year ago and it was the best thing for him. He is older now, more mature and more in control of his quirks and tics so he was able to have a fresh start with kids who didn't know him when he would have daily melt downs at school and run screaming through the neighborhood.

The Resource teacher worked with him when he started school and helped him find common topics to talk about with the kids in his class. She also helped him make a power point presentation to share with his class about Asperger's so the kids would know why he acted differently sometimes.

He made a few good pals in his class and had kids excited to attend his birthday party this year!

The other thing that happened was that we met another boy with ASD who is close to Dude's age. Through a mutual friend we met the D Family and we all hit it off. They live an hour and a half away from us but we make the drive twice a month so the boys can spend the day together. it has done wonders for Dude's self esteem.

Another excellent resource for us has been our local Asperger/ASD community. We have met several families who 'get' us and who we are able to socialise with without fear of judgement. Look for a support group in your area and start attending meetings .. it helps to know that your not alone!

User - posted on 07/14/2011

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Hello All! :):)

My daughter 14 yrs old with Aspergers ASD, I want to help her persistently to make a friend, she is very lonley and Isolated she has always had a hard time making friends and is shy and lacks the social skills, she looks normal and lovely girl.
Would be a great to find any local parents with autistic youth daughters to chat to or maybe meet up with. we are live in south west London, please feel free to contact me

Bec - posted on 06/28/2011

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find an interest and if you can join him up with an organisation around that interest this way he will have a circle of famillar people and with time friends that will have something in common.

Patty - posted on 06/27/2011

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My Son is 10 and has all the same things as your son. He is in a program at his public school for kids with ASD so we have met a few friends there for him and their moms for me. Also in our town we have a group of parents of kids with ASD that meets every other month and I have met some other parents there as well. Our old school and town didn't have these resources and it was hard to find friends for him. I still was lucky to meet other moms who had nieces or nephews with ASD or knew of some other child with ASD and they were all very understanding and supportive. But now it is so nice to have friends for him and be able to talk to other parents who are dealing with the same issues. Good luck, I hope you find some one for him and you. You can always come here and vent or ask questions.

Mary - posted on 06/27/2011

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My son Chance also has PDD Anxiety disorder and ADHD we were just recently diagnosed he is 7 he has kids that he plays with but they like to push his buttons because they think it is funny. I am very overwhelmed. We live in garfield

Lydia - posted on 10/12/2010

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Is he in public school, in a private school, homeschooled? I know that when our son was younger, it was easier to be friends with children who shared his disabilities or were in his special needs classes. I think it would help for you to do a search for support groups in your area also...we had a great group where I used to live in CA (we're now in IN). The adults not only met together for support, we had functions where the children could attend and get to know each other. Our son is 22 now, but when he was younger, it was very difficult for him to associate with children his own age - he seemed to do better with younger children that were more alike with him mature-wise and older people such as adults. The kids in our church tried to be nice to him there, but hardly ever invited him to functions such as parties, etc. as they did not know how he would act around their friends. The same thing with the times he was in a public school - many of them either avoided him or made fun of him....it was only the other children in the special needs classes that would befriend him.
I think that if you take the time to explain fully to others what is going on with him, that it doesn't get in the way as much when different things happen that the other kids are not used to...if the other children are put in the role of helpers, sometimes this can be a positive thing too.
Don't know if any of these suggestions are helpful - since our son is an adult now, I have wanted to be able to help others through some of the same challenges that we had to face when he was younger. If you have any questions for me, I would be happy to answer them the best I can - God bless

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