I don't care what causes Autism

Katherine - posted on 01/13/2011 ( 43 moms have responded )

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The latest "This is related to autism" study really struck a nerve with me. You know, the one the other day that found that babies born close together have a higher risk of autism? Normally, I read the articles and think, "Hmm. Okay. That's interesting." And then put it out of my mind and forget it.

Forget it? Yes. Because until they come up with more definitive links, I'm not going to worry my pretty little head about it. Mostly because I don't really give a rats arse what causes autism.

Was that harsh? I'm not sorry. It's true. I don't care. And I live it each and every day with my two sons. One is fairly high-functioning and we mostly deal with anxiety, sensory issues and lack of eye contact (Okay, he has social difficulties, too. But he's happy). I have one that is just about as severe as you can get, complete with toileting issues, sleep issues, self-injurious behavior and being non-verbal. I've had feces and urine in every room in my house. We've had to replace every piece of furniture because he either breaks it, bites through the fabric or pukes/pees on it. Our walls have holes in them. Nothing survives here long.

And I still don't care what causes autism.

See, there are constantly studies going on linking autism to everything to what color hair you have to your shoe size when you give birth. I just made that up, but seriously, some of these studies are REALLY REACHING HERE. While I'm pleased they do so much research I also take it all with a grain of salt. Some sample sizes are smaller (or larger) than others. Sometimes data is fabricated. And just because a study shows a possible link or shows that they haven't found a conclusive link, doesn't mean there is or isn't a link. Confused? Most people are. One thing is certain: We still don't know what causes it. And more research needs to be done. I, for one, wish they'd stop rushing every freaking correlation straight to the media. And don't get me started on the Internets, mmkay?

Let's look at some of the things that have been blamed, shall we?

* Living near a freeway
* C-sections
* Jaundice
* 100 possible genes
* Gene mutation
* Pesticides
* Having babies too close together.
* Allowing your infants and toddlers to watch television
* Vaccines
* Prematurity
* Being old when you have your baby
* Wheat and dairy
* Metal poisoning

OH NOES! I'm not trying to make a joke out of this (because, it is serious. I guess), but can you see why parents are confused and upset? Every five minutes we're finding out that something else we did, or didn't do, caused our child's (children's) autism. And new parents? Heck, if I was pregnant or planning a baby right now, I'd be scared to death. I don't blame them. I still get questions from well-meaning relatives about what I did to cause my kid to be the way he is. You know, because it's all my fault. Maybe I was a refrigerator mother? Talk about feeling guilty. (To be fair, there are a few genetic causes of autism such as Fragile X or Rett's).

Look, we all want what is best for our kids. We want them to be healthy and happy. And, while I don't go around telling folks, "It's great having autistic kids! Get some! They're awesome!" I do tell them that they are awesome and our life is a life worth living. There are no guarantees in life and you have to make the best of what you're given. I view autism the same way. No one ever said it would be easy. But we're fulfilled and we're happy.

Until they come out and say, "We've got it! It's this thing right here!" I will remain skeptical. I'm just going to go through life as I always do, focusing on my sons and their well-being. I'm not holding my breath, however, because the cause/cure thing is a long way off. If it ever comes.

Do you feel like I feel? Are you sick of all these studies that really don't help? How do you feel about the authors attitude?

http://thestir.cafemom.com/big_kid/11483...

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Stacy - posted on 01/18/2011

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I agree that right now - it doesn't matter to me. But I would like to know for my close family and friends who are not done with adding to their families yet. I don't want them to go through what we are going through - and I don't mean dealing with DS on a daily basis. I love my kid and his quirks, he amazes me every day. But I could do without the financial aspect of autism. We've given up a lot as a family to get him doctors and OTs and social skills classes....we've given up family dinners together since so many appointments are in the evening. We've given up weekends together since that's when his OT is. We've given up family vacations to afford all this stuff that insurance won't cover. I would like to know what causes it just for others to be prepared for this financially. I know I didn't set enough money aside when DS was born....I was thinking we'd be buying shoes and backpacks for kinder, not almost $10K a year in therapies.

As for all the off-the-wall theories - well, that's how science works. You put it all out there until you've eliminated it as a possibility. And I'm GLAD I'm seeing so much activity, it means a ton of folks are working on an answer! Remember that Galileo was thought to be a total quack for suggesting the earth revolves around the sun and not the other way around. We have to start somewhere, right?

Kim - posted on 01/18/2011

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Yes these studies are a little out there sometimes - I just ignore them as well as some behaviorial programs that are as farce. However, YOU SHOULD CARE about what causes autism, because some day WE WILL KNOW.
I believe like most that it is genetic. The diagnosis of Autism is on the rise. You also need to think about these young families who think their baby is going to be born healthy and BAM! " youre child as Autism Spectrum Disorder." I have lived with it for 19 years. My family have had alot of challenges just like you BUT we have seen our child grow, and live and overcome some of those challenges. You need to take these challenges straight on - be an advocate for your child or children. Sound exhausting? Sure it is - but when your child is 19, you will be glad you did. Sounds like you need to get some support dealing with autism - there are alot of groups of there, because there are more families dealing with this everyday!!

Judi - posted on 01/20/2011

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On a serious note with all of these causes out there the partially-informed "helpful" people of the world like to place the "blame" on us the parents (and I have to say mainly the mothers. Diagonosis is a time of confrontation of our ideas and dreams for our children, adding the fact the we ate peanut butter of the 3rd day and the second week of our first trimester of pregnacy and THAT is what did it doesn't help.
A study that finds a way for our children to communicate, and thrive in this world is what we want (and having it yesterday would be good).

Jen - posted on 01/18/2011

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Autism sucks. It really does. I see my beautiful, intelligent, funny daughter struggle to make herself understood, to understand what people are saying to her, to play with other children, and my heart breaks for her. I'm also scared to death about her future.

Autism is in our family (husband's 1st cousin didn't talk till he was four and HIS first born has almost classic Asperger's. We also think my husband's brother has Asperger's, but he's never been diagnosed.)

My daughter's neurologist believed that it had something to do with auto-immune disease in the family, and we've got that on my side of the family. He also did a study to look at maternal blood chemistry of those whose children have only autism with no coinciding syndromes or disease. Apparently my enzymes attacked my baby's fetal brain tissue in a particular way. And then there's the well meaning DAN people, who believe in chelation, taking away all dairy, wheat, soy, and citrus, and backing off of vaccines.

I wish we did know for sure what the cause is, but the more important place to go to now is how to help our kids not just survive, but to thrive.

Judi - posted on 01/17/2011

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I'm hoping that no struggling scienists read this because they then may ask for funding to do research on the cause of Austim being hair colour and shoe size. It does seem that these studies are purely for the funding and not really any use. A study on how to keep your 5 year old in bed at night would be better - that would be a winner in this house.

43 Comments

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Rachael - posted on 07/20/2013

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I THINK I HONESTLY LOVE YOU !!!! ALOT!!!

In my area all the mums groups, support groups etc all focus on, and spend ALL their time on dr google finding out 'why THIS happened'! What? You're blessed with a kid who can teach you more about being a real, caring and understanding person? A child who will force you to sit the eff down and realize what is REALLY important in this beautiful life? Oh, the poor, poor dears........ I don't spend my time looking for what "happened to my child". I sit on the floor, play with my child ( anyway they can) and think what the eff did I do to deserve this kid? They are freaking amazing!!!! Don't raise money to find a cure - raise donations to assist active, useful tools, interventions, equipment. Raise funds to pamper a carer out of the blue, treat the child to a new experience.... Be proactive !!! Best post I've ever seen in my life!!!!

Rosie - posted on 03/22/2012

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Hi Katheine,

I feel you, and see exactly what you mean. One thing that bothers me, about all these theories that come out is how quickly parents believe them, ( not trying to knock them), but you can't believe everything you hear. My opinion it is genetic, environmental (in our food/ water). My family was tested and my daughter and husband had a chromosomal variable in their genetic breakdown. However, the Dr. who is a very highly respected geneticist didn't not know how to interpret the results. He was even dumbfounded and said that it was something they may know in a few years. I have 3 children on the spectrum & did not bother getting the other 2 tested once we learned the results of our oldest one. My youngest was 8 1/2 months at the time & there was nothing I could do about my other children having a future diagnoses. Just wanted to say to you & all the moms out there, to keep doing what you're doing, I respect you all for having to work extra hard to advocate for your babies! ;)

Bridgette - posted on 05/03/2011

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I am sick of all the autism awareness people that get money taxfree and yet dont help parents get services that cost thousands of dollars. There are so many causes of autism your surroundings, your water, air pollution, shots. DNA, they all mix in all of our areas and lives differently so that and people are supposed to all be different autism is different in each person. I want and need help my child is in a severely handicapped class- the worst thing he does is vocalize-he talks walks, school psychologist said hes understanding things the way a child 2-3 years older would. I need to get him in a class to teach him kindergarten skills (public special ed for 4 years now) he is 9. I need help cant get pt ot or a neurologist been fighting for 4 years. Does any one care about my child and the loss of his education or does autism = retardation to you?

Laura - posted on 02/08/2011

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I AGREE WITH THE BOTH AREAS OF THOUGHT. JUST LIKE ANYTHING ELSE IT CAN MAKE YOU DIZZY AND SOMETIMES QUILTY TO THINK YOU MAY HAVE DONE OR NOT DONE SOMETHING THAT MAY HAVE CAUSED YOUR CHILD CONDITION.I DO AGREE IN RESEARCH AND FINDING THE CAUSE OF AUTISM/ASBERGERS AND EVERY OTHER DISEASE AND DISORDER THAT PLAGUES MANKIND. I HAVE A FAMILY HYSTORY OF BONE CANCER/M.S.AND TRANVERSE MIALIGTIS. i HAVE A SON WITH AUTISM AND ONE WITH ADD. FINDING OUT WHAT CAUSES SOMETHING BRINGS US CLOSER TO A CURE. I DO NOT WANT MY CHILDREN OR GRANDCHILDREN TO SUFFER FROM SOMETHING THAT MAY BE PREVENTED. KNOWLEDGE IS POWER.I DO AGREE THAT IT WOULD BE NICE TO HEAR OF LARGER STRIDES IN RESEARCH BEFORE THE MEDIA SPREADING SPECULATION BEFORE PROOF.WHEN IT COMES DOWN TO IT ,WE ARE GOINGT O DO WHAT WORKS FOR OUR FAMILY OUR CHILD AND OUR SITUATION. NO MATTER OUR VARYING OPINIONS.WE ARE ALL IN THIS TOGETHER.MOTHERS OF CHILDREN WITH SPECIAL NEEDS DESERVE THE UTMOST RESPECT. I AGREE WITH THE PERSON WHO POSTED ABOUT RUDE REMARKS PEOPLE(SO CALLED FRIENDS MAKE) NOONE NEEDS TO HEAR NEGATIVE REMARKS ABOUT THIER CHILDREN. YOU DO NOT NEED FRIENDS LIKE THAT.SURROUND YOURSELF WITH POEPLE WHO WUILL BUILD YOU UP AND HELP YOU GET THRU THE DAY. MAYBE EVEN WITH A SMILE ON YOUR FACE!

Jaenelle - posted on 02/06/2011

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Wow, parents sharing thoughts. My thoughts on the "cause" of autism is that it may be a combination of many things - which is why it's a spectrum. I have two children. My oldest was jaundiced enough to be hospitalized at 6 days old for 4 days; he had all of his immunizations on time - even though I voiced concern and he was taken to emergency with a 105 fever that same evening. My 2nd has not received all his vacs in close proximity and is not as impacted. I know my reactions to vacs (got to travel aboard) was very severe. So it could be my children would be sensitive enough to have vacs open the door to being on the spectrum. Medical communicates emphatically states "...absolutely, no way!" There's a reason why it's termed "practicing medicine." They only know factors based on years of accumulated data. Right now they fumble and stumble and guess as they collect data seemingly meaningless information until someone uncovers credible information. My frustration is with so many therapists claiming they know now to work with my children while just racking-up billable hours and using my children to training (oh, excuse me - overlapping) newcomers during therapy time.

Linda - posted on 02/02/2011

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You all are so right! Who cares what causes it, lets find a way to help these kids, young people and adults! We live autism everyday and I'm just grateful for the good days and the small successes!

Morgan - posted on 01/26/2011

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I agree! I really don't even take the time out too read on new research. I can remember at one time I was completely consumed by google and autism search. How depressing it was to find absolutely no answers! Know after 1 year and a diagnoses I am with peace when it comes to the subject..truly! I was so caught up at the time with..what have I done? What caused it? Guilt was a big one I would have too say and then it came to me....What do I need to do too help him! Since then he has started speech and occupational therapy. He goes to a special pre-school too prep him for school coming in september. He is currently on a waiting list for IBI and also have a worker that works with me to work with him...I have also done alot of training courses. Thank god for all the funding I have had the opportunity to learn every aspect of autism! So what I'm really trying to say is that...who really does care about where Autism comes from! Its what we need to do as parents too treat, teach, find the resourses to make our children succeed!

Tina - posted on 01/26/2011

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I have a different opinion than most. I think they should do lots of research on finding the cause. We can treat the symptoms but not to the best of our ability without knowing first what causes it. Case in point: my son has always had horrible sleeping issues. I've been to all sorts of doctors, even a sleep specialist. I've tried every type of behavioral modification. Nothing worked. Why? Because the cause was DIFFERENT that they suspected. It was yeast. Once we treated that, his sleep improved dramatically! Another example unrelated to autism: Ulcers. For years people with ulcers were told that it was due to stress, certain foods, etc. But it wasn't until one man was gutsy enough to test his hypothesis on HIMSELF because no one else would do it (it may not have been ethical to make someone consume bacteria), that he found the TRUE cause (H. Pylori). This led to a way to cure it with antibiotics. Another example: My husband has eczema. He went to multiple dermatologists to get help. They gave him all types of creams to treat the symptoms. This had limited effect. Why? They never considered the cause of it. They only treated the symptoms. Only after I suggested that he go to a allergist did we find what the cause was....food allergies. Once he addressed the true cause, his eczema disappeared.
Moreover, finding a cause may help find a cure. In the event that no cure can be achieved after finding a cause, then at least people can plan their future/family planning based on what the cause is, whether it be genetic counseling or avoiding certain environmental causes.
I do understand that the eclectic array of studies and their ridiculous conclusions are quite frustrating. I take all studies with a grain of salt because the media hears it and immediately runs with it before it is tested by peer review and repeated with identical results. And many researchers misinterpret data, especially if they do retrospective studies. The data may, in fact, simply suggest a correlation rather than a cause/effect relationship, for example. Their methodology may also be flawed.
Research is essential for medical innovation and treatment. No medicine, treatment, etc came about without thorough research and strong vetting of the results. If we stop the research for the cause, then we will not move forward with effective, targeted treatment.

Jennifer - posted on 01/25/2011

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I am torn...i agree with you on one side of my brain but the other side...well i do know that because I believe that every child with autism including my son and even the differences in as you said multiple children in one family are so unique in presentation,triggers, and onset all the research has certainly helped in helping with sensory issues especially...i think the problem is instead of every research study being considered the Mr. Fix it of autism it should be taken for exactly what it is good for individual inspection and use...I disagree with not caring however on what causes it....I def. do care for the future of my grandchildren and so forth...the problem is the "reasons" are not going to be the same for every family or every child in that family...i wouldnt dare to tell someone else what there experience with environmental triggers or biological links have or have not been and wouldnt want anyone doing it to me..i think we all do our best to cope and adjust as best as possible but i must say i without a doubt care what caused this not just for my son but for all of our children to come...jenn

Katherine - posted on 01/24/2011

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I agree that the research needs to continue. It's just so frustrating that it's everything under the sun that causes autism. It's just like cancer. Everything causes it. Just once I would like them to say, "OH!!!! That's what it is!!!"

Tammy - posted on 01/24/2011

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I totally feel the way you do it is starting to get old hearing this causes it or that causes it. I wish they would find the right reason. Even if they do my life will still go on with autism and making sure my son gets the best care ever. The damage is done here but maybe they can help new mothers and there children this has to stop. Even if it is a vaccine issue or whatever it needs to stop. I totally agree with you.
Tammy

Misty - posted on 01/23/2011

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I do feel like you feel. I just want my son to understand his feeling and be able to understand other when they communicate to him. I love the authors attitude!!!!

Claire - posted on 01/23/2011

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Hi
I'm Little nervous talking about this and not because i'm ashamed but because we don't have a clear diagnoises on our 26month old yet, but our situation sounds so similar to some you, Our son is non-verbal he tip toe walks and runs and throws his arm around when hes excited, he also runs/paces back and forth screeching and squealing and he'll do this any time half through a book or playing with his trains which is another thing he does he lines them up one in front of the other and pushes them back and forth. Fortunately he is extremely placid and doesn't have tanturms and he sleeps beautifully every night, we are having a few issue potty training and trying to get him interact with you can be very difficult at times but on the flip side he is very loving and will give hugs and kisses.
Our son was assessed december 2010 and we recently had to take him for blood tests which was awful and it broke my heart as he sobbed the whole time, my issue is that medical system in this country have lots of protocals to follow and they are little reluctent to diagniose him however i feel that they know whats wrong with him and won't tell us yet ASD has been suggested to us as well as aspergers (my Nephew has aspergers), it's so frustrating we just want to know so that we can start get the help that he needs in place, we are waiting to see a speech and language therapist but we haven't heard anything yet and he does see a Portage nurse once a week who he love, but i just wish they'd tell us already.

Heidi - posted on 01/21/2011

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Yay, Ive finally found people who feel the same way I do. I am all for Research so that one day other parents and children wont have to go through the same things we have but its not going to change my son so I really could care less. My goal isnt to fix or change my son but to make him the most independent person he can be. I cant change my son to fit the world, I cant change the world to fit my son but I CAN change how I teach him to fit in the world.

Rosie - posted on 01/21/2011

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Katherine, you are amazing.....thank you, thank you, thank you....

I couldn't agree with you anymore, my daughter is 6 and she is amazing. My eldest daughter is 7. Should I feel guilty because my girls are 14 months apart, no. I guess I am glad cause 2 girls 14 months apart that are both "normal" would mean my life would be a lot worse....lol

I would like to say that I am so proud not only of how my 7 year old has adjusted to her sister but, also how proud I am of my 6 year old, who faces challenges you and I would never understand.

I really don't care what causes Autism, it happened to my family and ok it was not great news but we all have to just get on with it and try our best to make it work.

Thanks heaps Katherine, perhaps one day we will find out what causes it but hey as long as our children are happy who really cares....

[deleted account]

I understand what you are saying. But it is one thing to say we don't care about the causes, and another thing to say they should stop wasting time researching it. I am all for research, I think it is a good thing.

Jen - posted on 01/20/2011

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Jennifer, I agree that all of our kids need to get services based on the need and not the income of their parents. There are organizations that raise funds for therapeutic needs. I do fundraising for a local one around here (The Lucky Duck Foundation, Inc.). And there are states that provide more than others, companies that provide more than others. (I'm talking about the Maryland Medicaid Waiver whose waiting list I've been on for almost 6 years, Microsoft who pays for its employees' kids' ABA, and Pennsylvania in which state insurance provides a lot of therapy). But overall, this just needs to be included in our medical insurance in my opinion. Instead, it's specifically excluded from most people's policies. We need law/legislative change that requires all medical insurance to treat autism as the neurological disorder it is, instead of as the educational problem they (insurance companies) claim it to be.

Jennifer - posted on 01/20/2011

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I agree....how about help for these kids and their families???? Who CARES how we got here... here we all are! :)

Jessica - posted on 01/19/2011

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You know I really really enjoyed this, the seriousness of it and the laughter you gave me. I just told my mother in law today that No i do not want a cure and that is the truth I do not want my son to be anyone other than who he is. Parenthood was meant to be hard and these children teach us something new every day. I don't run around telling people autism is awesome or anything but my child is AWESOME by all means of the word lol. He's interesting, funny, handsome, loving, and smart. What else could a mother ask for? I didn't ask to give birth to a baby with difficulties but that is what I was dealt and I am happy with that, would it have been easier with a 'normal' baby, maybe, but I'm not holding my breath on that because my other son is fine and he seems to be more difficult than my ASD son lol. At least I ddin't have to run and chase my ASD child around the house because he was getting into things because all he did was sit there and spin tires or stack blocks. I gained weight having a child with ASD and lost it when I had the 'normal' son lol. what do they call the kids without autism? "neurotypical"? phhh whatever quit stereotyping these kids! I'm happy, my son's happy, that is all that matters and I could care less about a cure or what caused him to be autistic. It's always well you help him too much or you didn't love him enough or you ate peanuts when you were pregnant or you swam in Lake Michigan lol. SHUT UP already!! I get it and give you lots of KUDOS

Heather - posted on 01/19/2011

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Hi Sheila,

I couldn't agree more about the therapy and cost aspect in Ontario. I live in Quebec, it is even worse here. I had my son first assessed by CHEO and then went privately (in Ottawa) to have him diagnosed. If I had waited, it would have taken up to 2 years through the system. I highly recommend "Emerging Minds" to anyone in the Ottawa/Gatineau area. They are terrific!

Sending you all the best! I have a blog if you are interested to read it. The link is:

http://sprungontothespectrum.blogspot.co...

:) Heather

Heather - posted on 01/19/2011

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Finding a cause may help babies born in the future which is a wonderful concept. For those of us who are dealing here with the day to day chaos of having a special needs child, it rings empty. No one really knows & it may be eons before there is a true answer. My son is 4 1/2 & is severely Autistic. He is the most beautiful little boy in the world to me! I believe he was made that way for a reason. Whatever that may be, I want to be the best mother I can for him & never give up on bringing him out into this world as well as trying to figure him out in his little world!! He is non-verbal & I love listening to his sounds, the words he speaks in his own language. The expressions on his face. He has the ability to not care about the stupid things most of us worry about. His needs are simple. He humbles me that's for sure.

Christina - posted on 01/19/2011

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Anette, you made me laugh! Thanks! It is true. I don't have time to care what causes autism. And it doesn't matter because they will "change" the cause again in another six months. I've been living with this every day for the past eight years, and I've heard several things on the cause, each to be proven untrue.

Lisa - posted on 01/18/2011

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I'd like to hear some studies that can give us difinitive answers other than "it could be linked to/caused by..."
I have also suffered the blame game to some degree myself.
I just "loved" the negativity I received from my own mother about my son's diagnosis. I felt as though she blamed me for even having him assessed prior to the diagnosis, and made me feel a bad mother for admitting it out loud (Asperger's Syndrome folks!!!).
Excuse my language here, but what really PISSED ME OFF was her telling me months later she'd seen a speical on the Oprah show with AS children & teens. Finally (I do have to give some thanks to Oprah here) my own mother believed my son "had difficulties". Although I know AS is not as debilitating as Autism, but it's still hard work sometimes.
I wouldn't change my son for the world, he's my quirky, affectionate (when he wants) child who has major meltdowns at times.

Laurie - posted on 01/18/2011

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I agree with you but also i'm in the medical field w/ a son that has Aspbergers/PDD so I know that maybe finding medications will help if they know what causes it etc. I believe in my heart that its genetic, although people want a quick fix Having a child on w/ spectrum disorder will never be and is devastating one day & Joyous the next & sometimes both of those in five minutes!! LOL I feel parents have to be advocates for their children & if it doesnt help it hurts is my philosophy. NOONE has a right to tell me whats best for my son! I'm sure everyone agrees w/ that but I just try to remember that people mean well when theyre giving advice or I'm reading the same studies you all are. I pray everyday that he is just happy healthy and can function in society! But other days I'm a crazy woman so its just life w/ an auti I guess?!

Christina - posted on 01/18/2011

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THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!!! I thought I was alone. I also don't care what caused it and I don't see my child's autism as something I have to find a cure for. My child is unique and beautiful. I've accepted the autism and can't imagine him any other way. I work with him to make progress and make sure he's getting the best help at school and he has made a lot of progress, but when teachers tell me I should look into doing things like giving daily B12 shots to him, I just want to scream. I feel so alone, like it makes me a bad mother to not be going crazy and trying every fad and theory out there to find a cure.

RHONDA - posted on 01/18/2011

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I would love to know the cause...what if there are numerous ones? I still blame myself that i must have done something wrong. My sons behavior completely changed right after a pneumonia vaccine. Could be a coincidence, wish i knew.
That said...i love my little man just how he is!! He may be the one to find the cause, he wants to be a scientist. :)

Shelley - posted on 01/18/2011

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I agree with you too. My kids are mega yrs apart 15½,11 , 3½ so it can not be the latest. But we are sceduled for genetic testing next month & I will go through it but I am not expecting any thing from it really. It is what it is & I have an amazing child.

Annette - posted on 01/18/2011

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Kim: I think you miss the point. We, already living a life with Autism, don't have the time or energy to care what got us into this situation. We have to preserve our energies to move forward. Not to say that I don't support Autism research - because I truly wouldn't wish this on anyone - but for Heaven's sake, once you have a child with Autism it's fate accompli. It doesn't matter to us at this late date whether it was genetic, came from living near the freeway or is related to our shoe size. It is and we go forward. When they figure it out I'll be happy to hear, but until then I'm tired of listening to every ridiculous headline - especially when spouted by well-meaning but entirely ignorant people, "you know, they say it comes from the father's biting their nails when they were young..."

Shelley - posted on 01/18/2011

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i really dont think anyone knows what the cause is ....they told me it was my meds and then i hear that it was because he was a premmie so you just dont know.people are very judgemental when it comes to my son..on how i discipline him or the stuff he does.but i really dont care

Rhionna - posted on 01/18/2011

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I agree with you Katherine, I have a child with ASD and while I would like to find a cause/cure for future parents, but as far as I'm concerned it doesn't matter to me. My son is wonderful and I wouldn't change him for the world!

Jennifer - posted on 01/18/2011

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I totally agree with what you said.. You put into words what I have thought all the time!

Pamela - posted on 01/18/2011

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I agree my two are 14 months apart and according to that study my youngest should have autism but he is perfectly " normal" he is advanced for his age my eldest who just turned 3 last week has receptive and expressive language delay and has many signs of autism but we have not got a full diagnoses yet .

Ive never lived near a freeway, I didn't have csection and they didn't have jaundice, they have never been around pesticides and don't watch much tv, I was 25 with my first and 26 with my second I don't think thats old cameron was 8 days early and ewan was 2 days late , I personally think its genetics so many people tell me my brother was exactly the same as my son as a child. its all BS its just happens it just is so now lets all deal with our wonderful children and do whats best for them.

Katie - posted on 01/16/2011

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i LOVE WHAT YOU HAVE SAID HERE! My son is 21 months with speech delays and showing signs of Autism. We had him assessed for his delays at 18 months and since have had him in OT, physical and speech therapy. Our doc., his therapists and my husband and I have decided to wait until he is 2 to get him a pysch evaluation to give him more time to see if therapy will help him before we get a diagnosis. I have already had numerous friends and family members ask really rude questions about my parenting. "do you read and talk to him?" is a personal favorite. What kind of stupid question is that?!!! I really want to reply "no, is that all I have to do to get him to talk, make gestures or eye contanct with me??" When I first had concerns about his speech I asked his pediatrician for a refferral to a Audiolgist (beacuse he seemed like he couldnt hear me) and she said (without even asking me about our home life) "his hearing screening at birth was fine just dont let him watch tv and read to him more" ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME!!! I am also pregnant with my second son who is due right after my sons 2nd birthday.Now I get the "I cant believe you having the second one so soon! dont you know the risk is higher for your second one being so colose!" (which if I had known that my son was going to be delayed and possibly autistic I would not have gotten pregnant so early again but not because of the study just because I know that with all the therapy sessions he's in I want to focas on him. kinda hard with a newborn) either way if he is Autistic or even if they are both. they are still my babies and still children. I will support them and guide them and do my best at being an amazing mom. I have been totally surprized by these so call "friends" I have and the way they have treated me. I can find new "friends" who are more supportive. these are my babies for life!

User - posted on 01/14/2011

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Hi Katherine,

For me, worrying about what causes my son't autism is like asking who forgot to close the barn door when the horses are running across the field....who cares?

Once you have a child with ASD, your "job" is clear. Do your best to give your child the best life you can. It's the same job every person has regardless of their child being typical or not.

There are people who want to know, need to know...and I can respect that. But, this is something that I let go of a long time ago. There is nothing I can do to "change" what caused my son's autism.....

I would rather, in Ontario at least, that our government recognized ASD as a health issue and funded proven therapy services. If you have a child living with ASD and you are living in the province of Ontario, our "universal healthcare system" essentially abandons you to waiting lists and privately paid therapy....it is disgusting.

Sheila

Sarah - posted on 01/14/2011

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I totally agree with you! While it's no picnic to have a child with autism, it also comes with many blessings. I remember when I very first (reluctantly) became a part of the autism community and was so incredibly confused. Not only are people (well-meaning folks usually) trying to tell you how it all happened that your child has autism, but every friend and neighbor has some miracle cure idea (eat this, don't eat that, use this supplement, try hyperbarics, what about music therapy). It's incredibly overwhelming! After being in the community for a while, I've learned to cut the crap and use what works for our family. For our part, I'm fairly certain there is a strong genetic link. My grandmother, 2 aunts on my dad's side, a cousin, and my own brother are all on the spectrum and now it's been passed to my son. I'm certainly not going to be the person to debunk any hypothesis about what causes autism, but at the same time...does it matter?

Christina - posted on 01/14/2011

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I think they keep trying to figure it out because there is no answer. Personally, I believe autism is like downs, a genetic disorder that can affect ANYONE even if the family has no history of autism. There is only a 3% chance of having a second child born with autism, but once you have two auties, then your chances jump up to 33%.
As for the crazy studies about children being born too close together, I have to laugh! I have two auties. My 8yr old daughter and 5yr old son. Yup, 2yrs and 11mnths between them (although my son was born a month premature. He was due on my 8yr old's due date.) However, I have a child between them. She was born premature as well, and is 15mnths, 1 day younger than her sister, and 20mnths older than her brother. She is just fine.

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