Antoinette - posted on 04/09/2012 ( 4 moms have responded )
My partner has a 5 year old boy who has been diagnosed with mild autism (Austistic Spectrum Disorder). I spend weekends at my partners place but we live seperately during the week. We have been together 7 months. His son spends every second weekend with us and while he is with us he often bullies my 2 1/2 year old son. He gets physically agressive with him and does not understand why my son does not always understand his demands (the 5 year old is very bossy). My son looks like a 4 years old and is very switche don but he is still only 2 so doesnt always understand the games that the 5 year old wants to initiated therefore te 5 year old gets annoyed and lashes out. The 5 year old also seems to feel threatened by my son and jealous that he has to share his dad's time which is understandable. He doesnt deal with it very well and does not understand why kicking and punching my son, calling him names, intimidating him etc is unacceptable and mean so it is never ending. I know that it is common for kids in this situation (not just austistic kids) to behave this way however I find it very frustrating and challenging as I do not know how to deal with it. My first reaction is to protect my son and stick up for him but I understand that the 5 year old does not fully understand that his actions are wrong. They do get along sometimes and can play together but only in short periods of 5-10 minutes max.
My partner and I want to move in together and build a life but are very concerned about how his son will cope. Any advice on how to deal with this situation?