My Son has a behavioral problem and the school isn't complying w/his behavior plan who do I contact

Mary - posted on 10/12/2009 ( 20 moms have responded )

17

139

0

My son has ADHD with Autistic tendencies and We cann't get the school to comply with his behavior plan. They take away his recess if he gets too "bouncy",or loud or cann't concentrate on his school work ; Who do we contact to get some help to enforce it; his counselor has even been trying too.

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Bethany - posted on 10/13/2009

3

21

0

Another option is to contact your stated Dept. of Education and get an advocate. These people are fluent in the regulations and legal rights of children and their parents within the school system. It also allows you to be the parent and provides emotional boundaries when needed. In addition I suggest to always tape or video record your IEP meetings so that you can provide accurate references to the discussion, rather than depend on perceptions. Lastly, if your child is receiving services prior to beginning school, make sure to have a well planned and workable transition plan. This will assist in the change between settings as well as in building relations between service providers and staff.

If you see this, leave this form field blank.
Powered by RESPECT not THUMPS

20 Comments

View replies by

Jen - posted on 10/30/2009

7

10

0

We had the same problem our first year of school at a public school. I am not sure where you are located but in FL we have a McKay Scholarship and if the public school is not getting the job done you can pick a private on that will and the state pays. Otherwise, you need to call the schooolboard and talk to an attorney who deals with disablility rights. They have to comply with his IEP period. My son had difficulty in PE as well and at his new school his teacher lets him run laps, give him special points, while the others are sitting listening to instruction. This help him to calm down and get tired enough to follow the directions when they start playing the sports.

Christine - posted on 10/29/2009

16

51

0

Well then that's too darn bad for them.... You could get a lawyer and sue them over this, your son has rights!!!! Have you ever checked out www.autismspeaks.com you should check it out, the people on there are so helpful...

User - posted on 10/29/2009

21

14

0

Hi, I don't know where you like but where I live (Indiana) I called the Department of Education for an advocate. I finally decided I couldn't do it on my own. It's such hard work to try to fight ALL the time for your son's rights and see him not get them. So I finally called and got an advocate. She is going to help me. We will be calling another case conference, which I am sure is NOT going to make anyone happy. I'm sure they are all unhappy with us for pestering so much about getting things done that are written in the IEP.

Christine - posted on 10/28/2009

16

51

0

contact the school superintendant!!!!!! If they wont help I would contact his doctor...

Tricia - posted on 10/20/2009

13

5

0

What these schools don't want to follow is the IEP's or 504 plans our kids have. THESE ARE LEGAL TYPE CONTRACTS. The schools have to follow them. And if you want these changes to be made in his IEP call for another meeting and make them have the districts special ed, school psychologist, teachers, and priciple there and don't let them bully you. What state are you in?

Michelle - posted on 10/20/2009

8

16

1

well i hear u nancy and tricia i have been telling the school everytime i go in for his IEP meetings that he needs to be in one room for classes instead of his room then reading and math and other classes he goes to.. he is in first grade for heaven sakes not in sixth grade.. i never had to switch classes like that in first grade and i told them to keep him in one class so he dont get confused.. the answer to that is we dont have enough staff to do that and we need something from doctor telling us that is what we need to do,, and so i ask the doctor his exact words was i am a dr not a teacher and that. that is there experience they should know what he needs but if i was them yes he needs to be in one class.. so i told them they said they wanted to talk to dr and he still in all classes.. so i am having another meeting and stuff will get straight for my son. so for u mary keep up ur work and dont let anyone tell u they cant do it cuz they can.. there just to lazy to do it and it is to much work for them.. and i am tired of them telling me how to raise or what to do with my son they dont have to live with him i do.. and if they cant follow ur rules on what u want for him at school then y should u follow theres.. my motto u r in it to win it and u will get the help u need just stick with it i have and i still am good luck and god bless all moms who r have n a tough time with kids

Tricia - posted on 10/19/2009

13

5

0

Here in California we have what is called Area Board Nine. It is made up of lawyers, etc. Really that is a law suit waiting to happen. Our kids have more rights than these idiots that run our schools realize.

Nancy - posted on 10/19/2009

19

6

0

Do you have a Medicaid Service Coordinator? In NYS, this a free service. A coordinator can point you to any additional services you may need, as well as help you with educational issues. It is NOT his fault if he is bouncy or cannot concentrate - hello, he has a disability! Have they tried modifications, like a special cushion to sit on, or a rocking chair in a corner for him to get that sensory input he is clearly seeking? He needs help to concentrate, and the truth is a reg. classroom may have too many people, noises, etc., for him to be able to focus, that is what we went through. Now my son is in a special classroom, an Oak Tree classroom, specifically designed for autistic kids. The difference is huge!

Michelle - posted on 10/17/2009

8

16

1

hi mary my name is michelle let me start off by saying that all the other advice u have been getting is one i would suggest myself to. i to have a child who is seven he has been going through a behavior prob since age two he is seven now and has been put in a mental ward hosp twice he has been on all kinds of meds u can think of he has been to all types of specialist and he to is diag with adhd and autism with borderline bi polar and he also has been diag mildly mentally handicapped but first of all my son is a very smart boy he not stupid he is a very off the wall bouncing around hyper kid who is out of control in school as well i have done all what the rest of the ladies in here as told u to do and u stick to ur guns and make them listen have all ur ducks in a row and tell them what u want done i did it and my son is doing alittle better now he still misbehaves he is running away from sitters now and the ymca i know how u feel mary i have had restless nites and have lost alot of weight just trying to keep up with him he has a temper that i have to watch i have to keep alot of things lock up so he cant get into them he killed our kitten and tryed to stab my dog and even went after me with a knife its hard for me being a single mom and hearing ur story is my story times i wanna give up cuz he just wont listen but i think of him and what it would do and i go on i feel for u and if u ever need someone to talk to i am here i have been through it all and still do it every day i live my days walking on egg shells i just would like to wake up on day and say i can let my son go out and play and not worry i have to go looking for him cuz he is there where i can see him or i wake up and say i cant believe he his acting like any other normal kid would act its hard and i am so stressed each and every day i am up everyday at six thirty someday earlier cuz he gets up i never get to sleep in and the only time i get to do anything around the house is when he is asleep so i am up later to get that done good luck mary and again ask me any thing anytime i will be glad to help i know how u feel and i am walking in ur shoes as well again good luck and god bless u and ur family

Tiffany - posted on 10/15/2009

4

21

0

If he has these tendencies, offering him a place that is quiet, he could be getting over stimulated and needs to work it through his own way. I work with a child and when he is over stimulated he asks if he can go rock!!!

Suzie - posted on 10/14/2009

4

21

0

I would call another IEP meeting, but this time, bring outside people from your local Autism center, invite the doctor, invite the inclusion specialist for the school system, invite a parent advocate. Bring anyone you can into each and every meeting so that the teacher will realize that the IEP plan must be followed. But, and I'm guilty of this myself at times, try and listen to the teacher's concerns and see how you can help -- also all those extra people you invite will be able to help the teacher also.

Courtney - posted on 10/13/2009

2

5

0

You need to badger the school and take it higer within the school system. Who put the IBP in place. If you need to you can have a written document provided by a DR if he has been actually diagnosed. I am a behavioural counsellor in a group home and we have lots of difficulties with teachers accepting and following routines. All we do is consistantly harrass them about the benefits of consistency and following the programs. Good luck

Jennifer - posted on 10/13/2009

24

19

1

I have this problem a lot with my daughter's school. It seems they only tend to follow the parts of her IEP that are convenient to them. Usually I can solve the problem by simply reminding the teacher (or whoever the problem is) of the guidelines in the IEP, but sometimes I have to go above their heads. I have found that most of the time the person was unaware of the details of the IEP or sometimes unaware of its existence. Don't be afraid to speak up for your child. Sometimes we have to step on a few toes to get what our kids need. I know my school district is probably quite tired of having me to deal with, but I'm not in it to make friends. I'm simply fighting for my daughter any way I have to. I've actually seen a lot better results since they have come to realize I will not back down on any issue regarding my child's education! Parents are the strongest advocates children have. It's up to us to speak up and stand our ground. If all else fails, look into your surrounding school districts. I have found that some are way better than others when it comes to providing for exceptional children. Unfortunately the district I am in is not one of them! Best of luck to you!

Anita - posted on 10/13/2009

18

10

1

Always meet your childs teacher before the school year starts, set up their space in the class with them and the teacher before the first day, find out what your child needs know and do. It is really a good Idea to set up ahead and not go to school on the firtst day with the other students. The other students excitement and noise levels will cause a complete input shut down with no teacher time to help. We always had teachers who never singled out our child and who adopted the safe chair for the entire class. Alex had one bad teacher who didn't want any special needs kids in her room,she was caught discriminating against our son within weeks and lost her job! Visit with your teachers after hours use daily communication notebooks , and volunteer whenever you can. Also I make 20 copies of our IEP summary and meet and hand one to all adults working with him. Parent volunteers in cafeteria, yard duties, cafeteria workers, are often never told of special needs and they are usually the ones working with kids during tranistion periods. Enough of my babble, stay stron and relax take each day a few minutes at a time!

Alicia - posted on 10/13/2009

141

34

13

Quoting Anita:

It is your right to call a new IEP meeting to discuss changes. I always make a list of concerns and possible solutions before the meeting and pre copy enough for all team attendees. you can ask for an aid to take your son out on a 5 minute walk every hour if thats what he requires to be still in class. He can have a timer at his seat letting him see when his next break is coming. You can place a safe chair in his classroom, this chair is one he can go to for any reason at any time. he is to sit, take 3 deep breaths, clear his mind by thinking of his favorite color,and then choose one sentence to calmly share with his teacher. He can say he just needed time out, class too noisy for him to concentrate, dosn't understand assignment etc. The teachers job is to get to him in the chair to ask him within 5 minutes what his needs are? Many teachers find that giving a safe chair to all students reduces students frustrations and improves classroom behavior overall. We have had one for our son everyyear. Alex is a freshman now and we set one up in the councelors office. All his teachers are aware he has permission to leave class for this purpose. He still takes a walk in the middle of long classes. Last year he recieved the Presidents Award For Accedemic Excellence. Hope this helps out!



Hi Anita



Quick question. I am wondering if this ever caused resentment amoung the other kids and by extension problems for you son. My son is only three so I haven't faced a typical classroom yet. When I read posts like yours I think it's great that there are solutions but always find myself wondering if the solutions cause problems. I'm putting the cart before the horse worrying about this now but I can't seem to help it. :)

Anita - posted on 10/13/2009

18

10

1

It is your right to call a new IEP meeting to discuss changes. I always make a list of concerns and possible solutions before the meeting and pre copy enough for all team attendees. you can ask for an aid to take your son out on a 5 minute walk every hour if thats what he requires to be still in class. He can have a timer at his seat letting him see when his next break is coming. You can place a safe chair in his classroom, this chair is one he can go to for any reason at any time. he is to sit, take 3 deep breaths, clear his mind by thinking of his favorite color,and then choose one sentence to calmly share with his teacher. He can say he just needed time out, class too noisy for him to concentrate, dosn't understand assignment etc. The teachers job is to get to him in the chair to ask him within 5 minutes what his needs are? Many teachers find that giving a safe chair to all students reduces students frustrations and improves classroom behavior overall. We have had one for our son everyyear. Alex is a freshman now and we set one up in the councelors office. All his teachers are aware he has permission to leave class for this purpose. He still takes a walk in the middle of long classes. Last year he recieved the Presidents Award For Accedemic Excellence. Hope this helps out!

Heidi - posted on 10/12/2009

11

27

2

First of all you need to get a copy of your education parental rights from your local school board office if you do not already have one. Second you can turn to the principal for guidance. if this doesn't work, go to the school board member over the special ed. department. request a meeting to revisit your child's plan. you can have any advicate you want there on your child's behalf. be very specific in what you are wanting and spell it out for them. make sure that you are very clear about what your child needs. Make sure that you bring documentation to the meeting from doctors, therapist, counselors etc. show what your child needs. Meet with them and if this does not work then take it on up the chain of command at the school board. Lastly, you can always consult with the suprentendant.

If you see this, leave this form field blank.
Powered by RESPECT not THUMPS

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms