Please Help, Speech therapy nightmare : (

Rochelle - posted on 05/05/2010 ( 32 moms have responded )

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Am feeling really lost at the moment, My son who's just over 2 &1/2 is not talking, says a few words but only singing at the tv............ had his first speech therapy session today, what a nightmare.. told me i'm waisting my time, and should just get him some behaviour management therapy. because he wouldn't sit still.... we have been waiting months and that's all i get : ( do i bother going back or wait months more for someone else to help us???????

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Sheila - posted on 05/05/2010

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Hi Rochelle,

Given he has lots of energy, you can time manage it for the best results. My little guy when he started OT was a whirlwind....patient instruction from the OT was key. If he has receptive skills (able to understand and respond to your direction) keep instructions simple:

First we sit/then blow bubbles. If you don't have one, use a visual timer to help increase his tolerance for sitting through an activity.

Make sure his feet touch the ground when he is sitting in a chair...this is really quite helpful. If you have a chair that "snugs" him on the side AND his feet touch the ground, BETTER!

And I agree with Brandie...my son't OT did more for his speech and communication skills than the speech therapist! That was because she knew how to reach him!

I have posted this before, but I always think if it worked for one child it could work for another.This is the method that a friend used for her non-verbal child. It takes a huge amount of time, so be patient. It can also be very frustrating and heart-breaking....but you need to give this a year..not four weeks, not three months...it is at least a one year commitment once you start.

Set up a little table. This is your work space. Not the kitchen table, but someplace where when you go your little one will know that you are there to "work."

He sits on one side, you the other.
I am using bubbles as the motivator because this is what motivated my friend's son.

Have a picture card of the bubbles.
Do you want mommy to blow bubbles? (wait for a nod, and if he doesn't nod, gently nod his head (finger to chin) as you nod his face, nod your own.
Yes, mommy and Stevie love bubbles....
now blow.
Do this four or five times in a row.
Now, do this until he finally nods for you.
Once he begins nodding, wait a week or so before moving on to next step, but keep blowing bubbles every day and having him nod.
STEP 2
Get a picture of the bubbles.
Do you want mommy to blow bubbles?
(should nod)
Give mommy the bubble picture
(guide his hand over the picture in order to give it to you)
Oh, you want the bubbles, ME TOO!
Blow....do this four or five times.
Repeat this every day until he finally gives you the picture then solidify this step for a week or so

STEP #
Do you want bubbles,
he should nod and give picture
Say bubbles....(but you can wait for the B sound, that is good enough!)
model making the B sound, see how my lips make the b sound, gently place his fingers on your lips
This step might take AGES, it might even be too much and you then need to go back to step two and work on identifying other pictures (eg...do you want your drink, nods and gives picture)

But, let's be optimistic and he finally says B sound....
blow bubbles and

Step FOUR

Do you want bubbles,
nods, gives pictures and says B
Your job now is to get him to stretch out the entire word...it might be REALLY challenging, it might be very chaotic, and his temper might fly...YOU CANNOT REACT to TEMPER...you are the anchor in the storm that keeps him with you...his soft place to fall. He screams, yells, flips the table...no matter
right the table, have a new jar of bubbles,
You want the bubbles?
Say bub- bub
You are building a path through autism...you are basically attempting to rewire so that the message that is stuck in his brain is able to make it's way into and out of his mouth

Once he says Bubbles...move on! Pick other motivators (penny candy, crayons, magnets, stickers, WHATEVER HE WANTS!!)

Add words...(avoid pronouns in the beginning)
Billy wants bubbles...(if you can, learn the signs for these words so that he is getting an auditory and visual message)

Good luck to you!

Sheila

Brandie - posted on 05/05/2010

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well your speach theripist obviously does not have childern.. no child is going to sit with a stranger the first time and do everything they are told... id continue with the theripist while i look for someone else.. and behavioural theripy will deff not hurt.. might pick up more speach there than from an actual speach theripist. mine did :)

Deanna - posted on 05/30/2010

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Hey Mom...
Children with speech problems also have speech and interaction anxiety...I would report what that Speech Therapist had said to you and demand another...ABA, SPEECH, and OT all have similar techniques to coax a child to participate...That Speech Therapist could do great damage to your child's self esteem! and he or she shouldnt be working with little kids! My daughter screamed bloody murder her first month at speech and my lady kept with it and She made a ton of progress...thats what you're look for!

Deanna

Pamela - posted on 05/13/2010

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oh thats sounds horrible my son is 26 months and he will not sit still either so the speech therapist works with him thats her job she tells him we have to finish before we get to do the next game and she puts pictures up that say whats we are doing now and what we are doing next and gets him to pt the toys away some days we have to hold him to the chair alot more than others but he seems to enjoy it most days we have been going 1 month and have seen great improvement not just in speech but in eye contact and behavior . I would ask for another therapist they are trained to help not tell you you are wasting your time.



Im in Perth Australia and we are on the government waiting list which is 18 month long our day care got an assessor in and she is going to push us to the front but in the mean time we have gone private its 90$ for 45 minutes I will keep going privately until I know the government one is as good as the private.. we can't afford it but I don't care if I go bankrupt trying to get this sorted I sell things on ebay and we eat jacket potatoes 3 times a week

Dawn - posted on 05/05/2010

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I agree with the suggestion to contact early intervention and find a different speech therapist. No therapist should tell you give up after just the first session and in addition stating that he needs behavior therapy instead of speech therapy is unprofessional. .... *hugs* for what its worth my son had his speech therapy sitting in his high chair. she only worked with him til he stopped paying attention to that activity adn then would change (sessions were only 30 min at a time) but the lack of ability for him to move away helped to keep him focused. *hugs*

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32 Comments

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Imelda - posted on 02/21/2012

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my son underwent occupational therapy first for three months before the doctor recommended speech therapy.

Leanna - posted on 02/21/2012

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Can't sit still? That's normal for a 2 &1/2 year old. Toddlers don't have the impulse control to do things like that yet. Wait until he's at least 4 or 5 to get him into speech therapy.

[deleted account]

My son was 3 when he entered speech therapy, he also would not sit down. He is now 5 has limited speech nad now been diagnosed with apraxia of speech and ADHD. Therapy was and remains to be very difficult for both of us! I think that if anyone no matter who they are tells you that you are wasting your time when you are only trying to get your child help should be ashamed of themselves. I believe that you have every right to tell them that as well. These people are getting ;paid alot of money to help our children and not every child is going to sit perfectly for a session of therapy. It is part of teir job and a good therapist will find a way through play-based activities to engage your child to get what she needs from him. I would either confront your therapist or talk to the manager of the facility where you are taking your child. I will never put up with someone telling me I am wasting my time with my child! We only want the best for our children and people< even therapists do not realize how hard it is to see your child struggle. I always say to people try putti g a piece of tape over your mouth for 1 week and see how frustrating it is not to be able to communicate with your child. I would ask for another therapist (if there is more than one at the facility, that is what I had to do when I wasnt happy with mine) you have every right to do that. At the age that your son is at it will be hard for him to sit down, all they want to do is play and explore. I know it is frustrating, I continually face road blocks with my son but you have to push forward and learn that you are going to have to put up a bit of a fight sometimes. He is your child and no one else is going to fight for him but you. Be strong, I know it is a hard road.

Rocio - posted on 05/24/2010

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My daughter is 2 years 2 months and doesn't say a single word yet. She started speech about a month ago, but the therapist says its a process and isn't ready to start talking yet. He also really recommends the behavior therapy. I guess if they recommend it, it should help them a lot. Is your son in the regional center? Does he have a diagnosis yet?

Carla - posted on 05/24/2010

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You need to get a new therapist!!! Anytime you feel uncomfortable with the way you or your child is treated don't ignore it. My son had a hernia as a baby but his doctor said it was an undescended testicle. I got a second opinion and he was in surgery two weeks later. I have two children in speech and it has helped them. The ignorance of some people!!!

Michelle - posted on 05/23/2010

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find someone else people like that need a new career. wait and work on it yourself

Rochelle - posted on 05/20/2010

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thankyou soo much everyone... all your comments have really helped and i'm happy to say we have a new speech therapist and she is great Cameron giggled and loved his whole session ... i could see him mouthing the words trying to say it but nothing come out.... gives me hope : ) just yesterday Cameron finally had his Peadi appiontment that we have spent months waitng for the doctor seems to be thinking Cameron has asperges... now i'm only new here but i thought asperges was the smart kids that talk early and know everything???? does anyone have a non verbal asperges???

Kris - posted on 05/20/2010

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Out of a time limit, I haven't read the other posts so apologize if this is repeated. Our son turned 3 in December. He was severely delayed around 1 year with expressive language. His speech therapists were at a bit of a loss because they never worked with someone as young. What they did & we had to spear at home was sign language (ASL). We had to make sure to focus on words that he would be invested in like food, interests. We even had to make up some of our own signs due to none existing for certain things or being the whole word spelled, which was too complicated. Every child's different, this is what happened to work for us to jump start the speaking. Once he got to over 60 signs, we were told to stop signing because he was so proficient that he would begin choosing not to speak verbally because there wasn't a need. He was covered with the signing. Towards the end, he even helped us come up with some of the signs. (Remember most of them were trying to simplify having to spell the whole word - not baby sign).

I hope you are able to find a good fit with your son's language development. I'm also so sorry that was your experience. It can be so overwhelming & frustrating. Stay the course, though - your son will thank you! You are his best advocate, keep pushing until his needs are met.

Pauline - posted on 05/13/2010

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My daughter has a "severe" speech delay, and when i first approached a public speech therapist (when she was 3 1/5) she advised that we could try sign language to improve communication. At the time we did't agree, and tried methods of improved looking at our faces when we talked etc. When she went to school at 5 we needed to address the speech and went to a private speech - however it was awful - she tried to assess her on the first lesson - no wonder she never liked the woman - and it went for a whole hour. After 2 months of battles we decided to leave and try another ST. We have been seeing our new ST for almost 2 years now weekly and have experienced huge improvements. I recommend looking around as not all ST are suited to your child's needs.
Good luck with your efforts.

Sandy - posted on 05/13/2010

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Never ever let anyone tell you to give up. Fight for your child, They told me to institutionalize my son at 2, because he would never accomplish anything. Whatever, I said. Fought for my son and made someone listen, years and years, but I got my way. It is great to do ABA. Go to another speech therapist. It will get better. My son is proof, he was never to be "educated" and looking at him now. He is smart, funny and never stops talking. He is in regular classes and is functioning child. he to did not speak, and had the full symptoms. But I never gave up and when one door closed I forced one open. You have a window to pull your child out.

Linn - posted on 05/12/2010

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I would get a new therapist. I have 2 kids in speech therapy and neither are expected to sit still for the entire time. Most ST that i have seen incorporated activites/playing with speech to try to increase speech skills. No one can expect a 2 year old to sit still all the time. If he really does have issues with remaining still long enough try some positive reinforcement. Reinforce him verbally and/ or with something he likes when he is able to sit still. Best of luck to you. Don't give up things will gert better one way or another.

[deleted account]

It's so sad how people treat others who have a serious issue that needs addressing. I recommend trying another practioner, but I understand the waiting game. I'm not sure if their suggestion of 'behaviour management therapy', was an insult to you about his behaviour, or if they really meant that he has problems and they feel he needs that worse then he does speach help at the moment. As for waisting you time, as they said, it's never a waste of time for a parent to try to help their child. Though it's up to you, I would just have to find another therapist.

Debby - posted on 05/11/2010

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I would definitely find a different speech therapist. My grandson was 2 and had the vocabulary of an 8 month old. He had a wonderful speech therapist and within a year had almost caught up to his age.

Cecelia - posted on 05/11/2010

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when he has something he wants to say, he will. know of a child
who started talking at five. but is he seeing too much tv? it talks
for him

Ayla - posted on 05/09/2010

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I'm so sorry you had such a bad experience. That's what happened to my brother. Waited forever to get speech therapy but was told we had to wait until he was disciplined enough to sit still. This was after he had been diagnosed with Autism. We were very upset because we expected more help and understanding from a supposed professional. he just ran around and opened and closed cupboards, tried to switch the lights on and off. Eventually, we went to another institution, and they helped us. Now my son who is 2yrs and 3 months also has speech delay and we have been taking him to speech therapy for 3 weeks. He only really settled down after 2 weeks, so really there's only been actual intervention for a week. Maybe your son needs to get used to the place first. Will they allow your son some time to become familiar with his surroundings? He might just be overwhelmed by all the new experiences. Just my two cents

Gina - posted on 05/08/2010

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Hang in there.. Then breath deep! Your child can and does pick up on your "vibes"! My child was very sim and didn't "talk" till after her fist year of kindergarden.. Now the talking is non stop!

We found that a 2-3 person group helped. This group had both OT and Speech. The three of them had sim and dif issue but it atleast it helped... EVENTUALLY. Really it took weeks to get use to it and see any if little change.

You have to remember at all times that your child will go at his or her own pace and doing what your heart/mind is telling you is the best policy. Forget what the other children are doing. Stick with it and try to stay positive! You can do it!

Kimberly - posted on 05/08/2010

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OMG.. That would have upset me to the upmost. I too am having similar problems and feel like I'm at a dead end. My son will be six this year was taking speech at about 2&1/2, but his therapist left and they didn't assign him another and just left that on me. So he gets speech at school, but still not veryverbal and when I found another therapy center, they just kept giving him replacement therapist and the one who he was connecting with was just temporary too.. So lastly I took him from there because the permanent therapist couldn't keep his attention and she seemed to be getting frustrated with him. BIG NO NO..Patience and understandin a child of his stature was what I found wrong with her. So now I'm waiting to hear from his former therapy center, but no luck just yet. Don't gie up on your baby, keep searching, there's bound to be a therapist out there who can help u and understands a child with his needs.

Kim - posted on 05/07/2010

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I'm so sorry for this inexcusable response. In my area we have different programs called "early intervention" or ECI early childhood intervention. It is a government program for young children with any type of delay. Ask your pediatrician for information or seek out someone who has experience with Austic children. ECI helped my son alot. don't give up it will make a difference. Just need an appropriate professional.

Rochelle - posted on 05/07/2010

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Thanks again everyone, your words of encouragement have push me to find better service and knowledge of speech therapy and also to read as much as i can and asked many questions : )
thanks you Alice I'm from Queensland, Australia and our health system is not very good, there is long waiting list up to 6mths for all services such as speech therapy and O T or you can go private an still wait a month or 2 and pay about $80 for half an hour session. lots more for the first visits.. we are on the waiting list for the hospital for both my little boys Cody aged 3 &1/2 needs help with speech and OT and cameron aged 2 &1/2 who only says a few words like jump & bubbles and sings some songs gets the tune and some of the sounds of the word right... hard to explain, i need to video tape him lol...sorry i can't help you with signs i did get a dvd thats does about ten words in signs and it was the first and last time i heard Cameron say Mum..at the tv : ( it was called Baby blinks...

Alice - posted on 05/07/2010

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Don't give up Rochelle! We are easily discouraged by trusting in the professinals that are kids have to see. Maybe seek a behavioral specialist while he is in a speech program will help him to talk more. My daughter loves her speech therapist always have. She is on her third therapist due to some personal issues I had with her 1st one than took her to her second one and she left the place of business and now we are back to the same place we started with but a different therapist. It's a roller coaster ride and you need to stay on it instead of jumping. My daughter has some impulsitivity issues but they redirect her and she will listen (she is 3). Maybe have another evaluation with a different S.T. Did you also typed that your son sign's? How many words? and will he talk while he is signing...my daughter talks more because of the signs, is there any help you can give me on the signing? I am teaching her myself. I wish you both the best of luck. Where are you from? Do you have him in Help me Grow program (they are excellent source) and than Early Intervention program, is he enrolled in a special need pre-school yet (the preschools offer their own PT OT and Speech some schools even offer Music Therapy, I don't know if all the preschool offers their own therapist or just the special needs. Insurance? are you self pay or do you have insurance cover....that makes it harder too...Please let me know if you have recieved the help you need. Thanks

[deleted account]

Try Sheila's suggestion about playing bubbles. Observe your son's interest and make it your instrument in teaching him at home by sitting next or in front of him. I suggest also that you look for a good Occupational Therapist. He will teach your son how to sit, wait and listen. Speech therapy can wait when your son is ready. Be patient. My son is 12 years old now and he is still attending Speech therapy but he is now talking. He still need improvement in answering questions. We wasted a lot of money and time in his speech therapist when he was still your son's age. But he became ready when he was 5 years old. Try also fish oil it helps a lot not only to my son but also to other children of my friends who also had speech problem.

Lisa - posted on 05/06/2010

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Tell them to pull their heads in and do their job which is to supply you with a service not a diagonises

Rochelle - posted on 05/06/2010

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Thankyou everyone and NO i will not give up... ohh Nicola, my son did just that... throwing toys, opening the door, pushing buttons.. i feel better knowing i'm not alone thankyou :) you have all given me some great advice thankyou.... photo cards of things my son likes is great and i have been busy taking photo's around our house of toys etc that he likes ha ha it's been fun and can't wait to print them.... and thankyou so much Sheila .. these kinds of activity are exactly what i have been searching for today....if you have anymore please let me know......I am so thankful for circle of mums, don't know what i would have done without you : )

Nicola - posted on 05/05/2010

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hey my son is exactly the same,hes being going speech therapy over a year now and he jus wont sit still,hes 3 and hes either throwing toys around or pressing the buttons on the phone or opening and closing the door of the room,,the speech therapist has tried everything ,as this stage im hoping the pyscologist is going to give a diagnosis as theres no progress being made..im just hoping 1 day he will talk...hes got speech therapy on friday and im not holding back,im gonna tell it the way it is to them,,,,he needs 1 on 1 therapy...

.Try staying with the speech therapy,maybe try print out pictures of his fav cartoon charact and try and get the 1st letter of the word,if he will look at your mouth to see how its pronounced,,,GOOD LUCK !!

Jeannie - posted on 05/05/2010

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I',m so sorry to hear about ur experinence. Speech Therapy has done wonders for my son. I would'nt give up, we did'nt always agree on their technique, but his speech improved. He is now 9 and still receives speech therapy thru his public school. Keep trying to find the right person, while waiting i would try another session, DO NOT let the therapist talk to u like that!

Remember they r working 4 u! Good Luck

Latisha - posted on 05/05/2010

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i would find someone else no two year old is going to sit still and and for the speech therapist to say something like that does not know how to do her job, it is never a wasit of time to try to get help for your son. have you heard of eci. they helped my son get in school he was 3 in ahalf before he started talking and i owe it all to the school for that please keep me updated you in my prayers stay strong and keep your head up.

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