Dawn - posted on 11/22/2009 ( 18 moms have responded )
My son is now 12 years old, and we only found out he has AS a little over a year ago. Although I have a lot of knowledge on AS and his diet, exercises, how to teach him the social skills, and understanding that I am SUPPOSED to have rock solid patience with him - I keep banging my head against the wall when it comes to discipline and getting him to do his chores. The ONLY chore he has to do is wash the dishes and it takes 4 hours to get him to get the smallest load done. I can handle the jumping around the house, and the nonsensical noises he makes ALL the time. I can handle the bickering with his brother and even the dirty clothes all over the place because he throws them at the ceiling fan. What I am having problems with is the talking back, constant whining and crying, and not doing the dishes. My husband's answer is to spank him (ok those are not his words but I am trying to be nice about it) but spankings do not work and my mother beat me as a kid so I don't want to do that to him. We have tried the positive reinforcement, and the redirection. I have tried reward charts and taking away privileges. Nothing seems to matter to him. When I holler at him he just stares at me with this look and then does whatever he feels like doing anyhow. For the first 10 years he was diagnosed ADHD and that was a hard road to accept in itself. AS is a whole new world and I am not sure where I fit into it. Last night I had an emotional melt down and said things to my son that I did not mean. He ended up leaving the house and didn't come how for 2 hours. During which time I freaked out because I didn't know where he was. But he was at his friends house watching a movie and was safe. When he came home it was like nothing even happened. And then this morning he is back to being my wild child and nothing from last night has even sank in. How can I get him to be disciplined so that it sinks in and he learns what behaviors are acceptable?? Before I totally lose my mind. Oh, and a little history - he had been on every medication for ADHD and nothing worked right for him. We took him off all meds on 10/28 and changed his diet and added vitamin supplements and he is doing better then he was before, so I know meds are not the answer he needs.