social development vs. academics

Laura - posted on 06/12/2009 ( 3 moms have responded )

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My son is 7 and just finished his 1st grade year (half days there the afternoon half in his AI room). He started the half day inclusion in January so he was only in there for half a year. For awhile his teachers were telling me he's adjusting well but would benefit another year in 1st grade. Two days before school was to finish for the year, his principal informed me at his IEP that it would be better for him to continue with his socialization and move up to 2nd grade and work on his 1st grade academics in a resource room or in his AI class in the pm. Their reasoning behind this is they work more for social development in the age appropriate grade level and work the academics according to their speed.

My concern is my son's awareness that he's not at level with his "peers". Isn't that part of the socialization? Has anyone with an older child dealt with this? Are they aware they are not at the same academic level and still be able to socialize? Are the other kids more likely to taunt if they are aware he's not at the same level or will they not care?

Anyone have experience with this challenge?

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Kristie - posted on 06/13/2009

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I understand your concern. My daughter has Aspergers, so no social skills. She is going into the 7th grade. The kids will care either way for kids are cruel, I have realized. Going up into another grade with his peers will help him realize behavior that is expected so that is a good thing. Academically, he won't be equal with his peers. Social skills go along with academics. I have realized that my daughter won't be on the same page as her peers and she will get made fun of, which is extremely hard to handle. All I can do is help her with the situations when they arise and pray a lot. Right now she is doing well enough for I am staying on top of her and the teachers to get her homework turned in and any other assignments. Ultimately, I believe it is your call on whether your child should be held back or not. This would be the time to do it if it is to be done. With your concern of your son's awareness, is that he will be, if not already, that he isn't at level with his peers. He won't be at level with a grade younger either for the age difference. Our kids are tougher than they seem and as long as they have a very supportive family and a few supportive teachers, they will make it. I don't know if any of this helps or not. Be encouraged, keep being an advocate for your son, and do what you think is best. You are your child's best advocate.

Kristie - posted on 06/13/2009

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I understand your concern. My daughter has Aspergers, so no social skills. She is going into the 7th grade. The kids will care either way for kids are cruel, I have realized. Going up into another grade with his peers will help him realize behavior that is expected so that is a good thing. Academically, he won't be equal with his peers. Social skills go along with academics. I have realized that my daughter won't be on the same page as her peers and she will get made fun of, which is extremely hard to handle. All I can do is help her with the situations when they arise and pray a lot. Right now she is doing well enough for I am staying on top of her and the teachers to get her homework turned in and any other assignments. Ultimately, I believe it is your call on whether your child should be held back or not. This would be the time to do it if it is to be done. With your concern of your son's awareness, is that he will be, if not already, that he isn't at level with his peers. He won't be at level with a grade younger either for the age difference. Our kids are tougher than they seem and as long as they have a very supportive family and a few supportive teachers, they will make it. I don't know if any of this helps or not. Be encouraged, keep being an advocate for your son, and do what you think is best. You are your child's best advocate.

Carolyn - posted on 06/12/2009

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As a teacher that deals with autism, inclusion is very important for socialization. The key is appropriate teaming of reg ed and special ed teachers; adaptations in class like picture schedules, etc and training for them. Parents are an important part of the IEP. Ask to remeet and disucuss this. Remember, so have rights to appeal.

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