temper tantrums out of control - help!

Kari - posted on 12/05/2012

Oh and his fits range from throwing himself on the floor/ground to throwing things or beating on me and his sister. His father is against medicating him but I am not, if it helps.

Kari - posted on 12/05/2012

My son is 6 yrs old and has been having the same thing for the last 2 weeks, it has gotten worse. He was diagnosed with Autism when he was 2 1/2 and was just the perfect boy until recently. I don't know what to do, I pick him up from afterschool daycare and I cry every time because he is so out of control. Need advice!!!!

Jessica - posted on 03/21/2011

Hi there! I have a son also with aspbergers. He is 8. We started him on Abilify last year. HUGE difference. He is now on 7 mg of abililfy and 36 mg am for focus concerta. this allows him to eat. He is also in a school for him. Everyone is on the same page. Please call me if you want more info. I can share what we have done. I have been there. Keep your head up! It will be better. We had the same problem. I would love to share with you all we did to give you options. 317-452-5340 Jessica

Samantha - posted on 11/04/2009

My son was diagnosed with aspergers at age 4 but the tantrums were TERRIBLE!!! He became depressed and violent to himself and others. After struggling to find help I met a doctor who also diagnosed him with ADHD. Once he was started on aderral (only 5mg cause I was so nervous) the tantrums all but stopped. He seemed to be able to think and communicate more clearly. good luck

Renee - posted on 11/03/2009

Yes I would agree with find the trigger(s) then investigate some strategies for helping him to calm down. A few things that work for my 8 year old son - an exercise we call "smell the flower, blow out the candle" try it - take a deep breath then blow it out. The visual of the smelling and blowing makes it easier and little more fun than just take a deep breath. I also agree that one wrong word can spell disaster - they think you mean something else and the reality is you both were talking about the same thing. Also showing it written down not just verbally helped my son immensely when he was non-verbal he could read and even if he didn't know all the words he quickly caught on. Social stories are also helpful.

Melissa - posted on 11/02/2009

I posted further down the page...still new to this app, so bare with me. In addition to my other post, my son also uses his temper to get out of things. He has learned to manipulate people. If he doesn't want his speech therapy, he will act up so they will leave him alone.

Melissa - posted on 11/02/2009

My son is 8. he is non-verbal. Most of his tantrums are sparked by not getting his way. Other fits we can't explain. The violence behind them is astounding. We've tried many interventions, but eventually we had to venture into medications that treat him on a psychiatric level.

Sarah - posted on 10/25/2009

I have had this problem many many times Chantelle, my son is now 11 and just been diagnosed with Aspergers. I have mainly dealt with each meltdown as they come depending on the situation, i.e the place where he is having a meltdown or how severe the meltdown is. If at home I would take him to his room or an area where he could just lash out or be safe without hurting himself or that has as few items that he could grab and throw as possible and let him burn himself out. This is easier said than done I know, Shouting or trying to talk to him was pointless as my son would be in such a blind rage he wouldnt even hear you. If he does pick any thing up or go to hurt u just try and guide his arm or feet away from you, take the item away from him as calmly as you can.. Its really hard as no one gives you any idea on how to deal with these situations, I have always when possible and son has stopped having a meltdown, just left him in his room for a few hours or how ever long you feel appropriate to give him enough time for him to calm down and be in a more suitable mood for you to talk to him. Also you need time to come away from the situation to calm yourself down and think about what set him off or how to talk to him. Once you have both had enough time go to talk to him calmly and if you know why he had the meltdown try to explain to him that what he did was wrong and talk him through what set him off as some times its something that you have said or done or a situation that has arisen that he doesnt understand. I find myself being very literal with my son and making sure any instructions are simple and very clear, so instead of saying in five minutes you are going in the bath, give him a time and show him on the clock so he can see for himself. If plans change try and give him as much notice as possible although again this is easier said than done at times. Structure and set times to do things, daily routines are a blessing.

Paulette - posted on 10/24/2009

Hi Chantelle my son is nearly 6 and he is both physically and verbally abusive when he has a meltdown. There are so many things that can trigger him off and if it happens at home we can usually see what started it but it is a lot harder to determine what the problem is when he comes home from school and loses the plot. It is very emotionally draining for the whole family.

Michelle - posted on 10/23/2009

My son is 6 and non-verbal. We are also experiencing the tantrums. Not fun...

Jane - posted on 10/23/2009

my son use to have massive ones and we couldn't understand why.



Senstivities can be a reason as can your wording, my son would ask for something and we would say you can have it............well he would go crazy, hitting, headbutting, throwing things, screaming etc.



Took ages to work it out, till l read about a boy who liked vacumm cleaners had to seek them out where ever he went, asked dad if he could play with the vacumm dad said he could play with it. All hell broke lose, he didn't want "IT" what is it? he wanted the vacumm. Dad should have said you can have/play with the vacumm. One word wrong...



We were forever saying yes you can have it. My grandson is 4yr and non verbal and when he wants something he will place it in your hands to give straight back to his hand if you say anything to him like here you are, anything it sets him off. Just give don't speak. LOL



Sometimes just one word can make a difference. Basicly you have to deal with the reason for the behaviour is he wanting to do a specific activity/chore, trying to get out of a activity/chore, scared, oversensitized, you need to deal with all these differently. I would maybe see about a behavioual therapist if things continue.

Pamela - posted on 10/23/2009

hi chantelle,my son is autistic and 2 years ago went thrugh the same thing he is now about to turn 6,i also was covered in bruises and screatch marks! i feel for you,we had to first work out what the triggers were and then try to illiminate them i.e.he did not like loud noises certain lights in the supermarket ect,or sometimes even physical contact,it also was a problem that he could not comunicate as he could not speak which in turn gives them a lack of global awareness,or what is going on around them,does your son have speech diffulculties?i did find makaton sign really usefull as it gives a very clear visual of what is going to happen next and what you expect behaviour wise,i.e.try raising your hand flat and fowards to give a stop signal and say stop quite firmly,this only worked sometimes but as long as we were on his level it was a clear signal of what was expected of him.also a visual timetable is very usefull not sure if you have tried that with pics ect?i hope this helps a little as i can relate to exactly how you are feeling right now,regards pammie.