Denise - posted on 06/26/2012 ( 32 moms have responded )
Ok, I will try to keep this as short as I can.. just every time I talk about this I get fired up and words spill out....
We have 2 beautiful girls who are only 13 monthes apart.. Our eldest was pretty much a planned pregnancy and we did EVERYTHING by the book.. her delivery was brutal but she came out a beautiful, HEALTHY girl and up until around the 9 monthes mark she was right "on track". We found out we were pregnant sometime around there, while I was on treatment for cancer. At that point we were late in the pregnancy and everyone fretted about the new baby and what would happen there... I feel so much guilt like I took my eye off our eldest for a second and missed something so crucial...
Our youngest was born totally healthy and continues to show signs of normal development, but our eldest does not talk.. she babbles and "uses jargon" she hand flaps, she runs wild and toe walks and ultimately has a hard time being engaged... She is an amazing child though.. she loves animals and seems at ease in nature, which is quite the stark contrast to the little gril throwing tantrums and smashing herself off of furniture at the drop of a dime... no one knows because she cannot communicate.
We have been working with an early intervention program since she was about 18 monthes old... we had to fight tooth and nail to get the referral. She has made STRIDES... we can engage her for 5 minutes at a time a few times a day, she has started showing us to things when she wants them.. the "jargon" as they call it has continued and transformed... she has even had a few words that stuck... but since they were all very random things they don't get used often (her first word was "sheep")
We recently went to a diagnsotic play group and I am so frustrated.. we met with an entire panel of "experts" who assessed her ( as much as they can in a room with 5 other kids and all the parents) and they just kept telling us how awesome we were... We are now on the waiting list for an intensive one on one diagnostic in the fall...
The thing about it is, any of my friends who DO have kids are getting out and enjoying all those "normal" milestones... it makes it hard to be around them and here them talk about "Oh Billy used his first sentence today" etc..... I am at a loss as to what next steps I can pursue for her outside of the program and feeling like I am treading water most days wishing I knew people who were in similar situations... or where to look for tips on how to relate to her and engage her
It is SO frustrating she has moments when she is the same bright, cheery little girl and she is THERE and then POOF in another instant she is gone...It breaks my heart.