what to do with a runner- help please

Stephanie - posted on 05/11/2010 ( 17 moms have responded )

10

4

0

My 7 year old is a runner. If you ever want to sit or anything at the beach or camping or restauratns ( unless you sandwich him) he takes off, sometimes up to a mile. He has no regard to safety and cars yet. If you say stop he thinks it is a game and goes faster. I have looked all over online for ideas on how to "train" this out of him and most people say they outgrow it. I don't know if I can last that long and am concerned for his safety. Any ideas?

If you see this, leave this form field blank.
Powered by RESPECT not THUMPS

17 Comments

View replies by

Lisa - posted on 06/27/2010

20

21

4

I have a 12 year old who is the same way. I have come up with some tricks over the years that actually work! I've got to get to bed and I just saw this and did not want to ignore it. If you can message me on FB, I can give you detailed instructions. You can even copy and paste here. It's just very detailed and I must go to bed and I hardly ever get over here because I have not learned to navigate it or how to get COM updates to my FB page even tho I thought I had linked them.

Melanie - posted on 06/26/2010

137

13

19

My son is too strong and breaks the toddler leashes. While looking for an alternative we have temporarily started using a belt with a d-ring and a dog leash to keep him with us. You can also use a dog collar if you can't find an appropriate belt and your child is skinny enough. though as I have said we are looking for an alternative.

[deleted account]

I have the same problem with my daughter who just turned 5. I have asks her Doctors and other people we meet with and no one has a good answer. One answer was get a service dog for her, but I need something now. She has almost been hit by cars so many times.

Rochelle - posted on 05/24/2010

32

4

1

My son is a runner, he's still young so i can put him in a pram or use a harness.... but some times like at the park, he wants to play but then see something and he's off...... we go to the park thats fenced now...... but i have been playing a game with him at home in the fenced yard everyday for a few weeks now we RUN and i yell GO GO and then i yell STOP STOP and we all stop he loves playing this game and is getting better and stopping when i say now.... i know it will take some time before to works out in the street but it's a start, good luck .............

Michelle - posted on 05/23/2010

23

25

1

i have to keep a close eye on my son whos almost 7 . he does better with bounderies now but if it is an extreme issue i would suggest a guide dog . the dog will stop your son from running. they are trained to do it and i know a lady who had to get one and she says it works wonderful for many things

Linda - posted on 05/22/2010

6

10

1

Our son now 22y/o was a runner also! We got him when he was 5 and adopted him when he was 9. It does not seem like that long ago but we actually used a dog leash when out and about. We hooked it to a belt loop on the back of his jeans and he felt free and we felt he was safer. Our problem was at home our yard is not and was not fenced in and even when we were outside with him off he would go, and boy he was fast!!!! Finally as a last resort we bought a 100 ft poly rope (like water skiers use) tied one end to the swingset and hooked the other to his belt loop. He was able to play and such, come in the house as needed, where he was unhooked. We did this for about a year until he learned his limits in the yard. By the way we had foster care specialists who checked the arrangement and approved of it.
My parents were watching him once they had a fenced in back yard and he somehow got out, when Mom went in to bathroom. They live in town on a very busy street and at that time he did not respond to his name from strangers. They called and called finally had to call police who found him about mile and half from their house. We did what was necessary to keep him safe and happy.

Stephany - posted on 05/22/2010

233

12

10

My oldest is a runner, too. We used the backpack harness things, but he eventually outgrew the one I had (didn't know they sold them for older kids- I'll have to look into that!). I found an alarm set at Target (in the baby section, near the child-proofing stuff). I think it's from Safety First. Anyway, there are two pieces- one clips to my clothes, and the other clips to my son's clothes (I clip it in the back so he can't take it off). You can set the distance (max is 50 feet, I think) and when he gets that far from me both components have loud alarms that go off. I still hold his hand and I've taught him to stop when I say "stop" in a stern voice, but in case he gets away the alarm makes it much easier to find him.

Rita - posted on 05/22/2010

2

5

0

My David is also a runner and as much as we explained to him that is dangerous, he continued to run, fleeing in the supermarket, to the middle of the road, I got plenty of scares. Unfortunately I had to appeal to the "man with the bag" (a portuguese figure of someone that steels children) for him not escape, in relation to the road I taught him the basics that is dangerous, he has to give a hand to an adult, observe signs and cross the walkways. Fortunately the boys with asperger understand things very well and those who have difficulty learning gain the habit of giving a hand, they learn that this is correct. About running in the streets he is much better. The thing that confuses me is that wen he watches cartoons he his at the same time running through the house, he runnes and runnes, and runnes.

Cherish - posted on 05/22/2010

727

72

180

Hi,
My son is almost 8 and is a runner too.
He won first place in the schools "special Olympics"...lol

I use a leash as well as a stroller I can strap him into.
I know it is hard,and he has gotten much better,He does not run now unless he sees something he wants(like a flag,snake,toy..etc) but when he does run he just goes,he will run in front of a car.

I pretty much avoid open spaces that are not fenced in,unless I am getting too fat and need to run with him...lol
They run,thats what some do I guess??

It is nice to see so many other parents have the same problem

Melissa - posted on 05/21/2010

3

1

0

omg this sounds sooo familiar! My son has just turned 7 and he is a runner too. It is that difficult to go out places because he cannot sit still and simply runs off. He has no concept of safety even though we are constantly explaining the dangers! I feel bad because its easier to stay home or find a babysitter rather than take him places. I'm yet to find any ideas about how to help or control this behaviour so sorry I can't be much help. My son has finally been diagnosed with asd and we are in the process of visiting a psychologist so if I can learn of any helpful tips I shall pass them on. Good luck!

Amber - posted on 05/14/2010

67

26

15

Before I had a child I looked at these people that had there kids on a leash backpack and I thought it looked so bad. But now I am so thankfull for the ones I had. I was doing daycare for a while and my son had to be on a leash everytime I would take the kids to the park or walk because my son would run away. He ended up breaking through a couple of them. I quit daycare because I could not keep up with him, and he hated the other kids. Anyways it is great to know that they sell ones for older kids, I had not even thought of that. This seems like a great idea. Thanks Renee! Hope it's something that could help with Stephanie too.

Renee - posted on 05/14/2010

621

28

139

No you cannot "train" this out of him. He has no fear and my son doesn't either. I bought my son a vest from ebay that has a leash on it. For a long time I gave him the choice, wear the vest and be tethered to mommy or hold my hand and stay close. After about 3 months of arguing over the vest he now walks with me and does not run. If I see him about to take off I quickly grab his arm and tell him that if he runs it is dangerous and he will have to wear his vest. No argument.

Amanda - posted on 05/14/2010

11

9

3

I can remember one time when my when my daughter was just born, she was just about 2 months old. I went to Walmart, I just strapped the baby into the cart and Logan took off. It was so upsetting because I had to leave my newborn sitting right there, alone while I ran into a full sprint after my 5 year old. I didn't know what to do. Luckily, a nice old lady was standing by the cart with my daughter when I returned. Anything could have happened! But that was the choice I had to make. On the way home I was so upset. I sobbed for hours. I couldn't believe I had to leave my baby. After that I didn't go anywhere alone. And it even got to the point where I didn't know what I would do once Logan grew too big to sit in a cart. So trust me ladies, I know what it's like. I look back and think "how in the hell did I get through it" but I did and so can you. Most of the time I still hold his hand, but when I do let go, he just walks beside me. I can even let him play outside with his siblings and he hasn't taken off in 2 years.

Amber - posted on 05/13/2010

67

26

15

Stephanie I wish you luck! I cannot help with anything but interested to see more responses on this. My son is 4 now and has been in this stage since he could walk. I still need to strap him into a cart or stroller when we go somewhere because he is stronger than I am already and I cannot fight him to hold my hand. I'm very worried one day he will get away from me to quick. He also runs into busy traffic streets, one of the times while he was in with his therapist he ran out the building into a busy street and I barely got him before a car did. I don't know how to make him understand that they will hit him and he will die...Hmmm Good Luck to us...

Amanda thanks for the encouragement.

Amanda - posted on 05/11/2010

11

9

3

Stephanie, boy do I know how it is. From the time Logan was 3 up until he was 7, he was running. He darted into traffic on a daily, would run in stores and even got away from us at a large amusement park. I thought I was going to have a heart attack. I would constantly remind him to hold my hand, tell him about strangers and about the dangers. I didn't even know it he could understand what I was saying to him, but I would still remind him over, over and over again, and even quiz him at home. Then one day it just stopped. I can't say for sure if what I did stopped this running or if he just outgrew it, but I sure am glad that it's over. Hes 8 now and I still hold his hand just in case.

If you see this, leave this form field blank.
Powered by RESPECT not THUMPS

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms