Do any of you feel unfulfilled/unsatisfied?

Brit - posted on 03/10/2009 ( 34 moms have responded )

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I was wondering for all of us in relationships, with either males or females, in open or closed relationships, if you feel saitisfied or unsatisfied. I know that whenever I date men I seem to fantasize about women more and vice versa. Does any one else have similar expieriences? I am personally dating a woman right now and am emotionally satisfied and as a couple we didn't feel it would be a good idea to have an open relationship, have threesomes, etc. However, that doesn't change the fact that I still fancy men. It's not like I want to cheat b/c I don't. I just wish sometimes that I wasn't into both men and women. I'd prefer to be a lesbian, lol. I wish it worked like that! lol.

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Erdem - posted on 07/09/2012

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i am saying all to you...yes being with your own gender would makes you feel good but we have been created for the opposite gender and nothing makes you feel as good as being with your opposite gender...

Lindsey - posted on 07/07/2012

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I feel the mounting weight of ignoring such a natural part of myself--either way, man or woman. I'm beginning to see that I cannot cut off one and focus solely on the other. I've tried, but I've always ended up feeling this hole in my being. My hubby is open as long as he can somehow enjoy (even if it is just to watch). I just fear someone getting hurt. Sending love and light to all! ♥

Cortney - posted on 07/30/2009

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I was dating women exclusively for 7 years before I met my daughter's father. I had always known I was attracted to both men and women, but always women MUCH more so. Since I've had my daughter (her father and I split up when she was 5 months old), women won't even give me a second look! So I continue to get in and out of relationships with men and am completely unhappy. If I could, I would love to get into a relationship with a woman and eventually get married, and I know I would be set for life.

I also hate the fact that I am attracted to both, but it's never been a problem NEEDING both when I'm in a relationship, other than when I'm with a man....all I can do is think about how much happier I'd be with a woman. UGH :(

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Catharsis - posted on 08/13/2012

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I see this post is kinda old but Im looking around for other people in a similar situation as me. I am a bisexual married mom and find it difficult to deal with the feelings I have and would love to chat to other moms/dads in the same place as me. Please visit my blog www.catharsisofmine.co.za and lets get to know each other. :)

Denise - posted on 06/13/2012

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Ladies,I am also glad this post was started.I am bi and married but have only been with one woman.It was a bad experience.However,I do crave being with women.My husband knows I am bi and has "accepted"it since we met but now seems to have changed his mind about allowing me to be with other women.I only want to have threesomes because I dont want him to feel left out or unwanted.He was fine with the idea before but when I actually started looking for a gf he got upset.I do want to have an actual relationship with a woman instead of just sex because I couldnt just be with someone I didnt care about or am not friends with.My husband knows this about me but still is not wavering on it.I respect his opinion but I feel like I need more.My husband is great in bed but it does not compare to a woman's touch.
I think we should start a group here on COM to get women in contact with other women in similar situations kinda like a matching group.Just a thought.

Miss - posted on 05/04/2012

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REPOST: I agree, there is nothing like the touch of a woman. I am quite fortunate. My hubby fully understands my need to be fulfilled ... and he does not seek to interfere in any way. We have been married now for more than 50 years ... and I love him so much... as my two girls {now women with their own families} would attest. But as I said, there is nothing like the touch of another woman. I am so glad that I found this spot... xx to all

Ashley - posted on 05/03/2012

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Brit, I totally understand what u mean. There was this one time I was in bed with this girl, and I was wishing a man was there at the same time.

[deleted account]

I am married to a man who fulfills my needs, but I do still feel the need to connect to a woman, both emotionally and sexually. My husband is very supportive of this, but I have yet to find a women whom I am attracted and attractive.

Veena - posted on 12/20/2011

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I fantasize of obtaining satisfaction with a woman, so am not fully satisfied by my husband.

Trisha - posted on 06/28/2011

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I have the same thoughts, I dnt like sex wit men much, and i feel bad cuz i dnt do much wit my husband, i am beginning 2 think that i am not rally n 2 men n e more and want only women

Ashley - posted on 12/07/2010

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Nika, I understand what you are talking about. I love my husband with all of my heart, and I don't want to be with any other man but him. We are not swingers, but we are in search of a woman we can both have fun with. But for me I want to have fun with the woman and be in a realtionship with her as well. I love woman and men both.

NikaMomofTwins - posted on 12/07/2010

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My husband and I are SWINGERS! He is straight and I and what some call Super Bi. I am married to a man and love him beyond words but i dont really like sex with men other than him! I will have sex with other men when we meet a hot chic and she is married to a man but im really in it to get at her, her husband could be there or not and it wouldnt matter to me! There is just something special about pleasing a woman that makes me happy! Luckily I have a freaky ass husband who gets off on me playin with women and givin other men head! i guess im lucky, no I know im lucky!

June - posted on 12/01/2010

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personaaly i only use guys for sex and i only date women. all my partners have been bi and let me sleep with men or they join in. i have an adiction to suckiing cock so i could never be fully les but like i said i will only date women

Nicole - posted on 11/24/2010

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To add to all whats been said being satisfied with a sexual relationship really ultimately depends on the partner you are with, If he/she/it can not read yoru body's reactions and respond to them to highten the pleasure of the experience its just well you know ( searched for my rabbit). As for the proposition of seducing anothers husband just to be able to enjoy it fully, out of experience I have done that several times since my divorce simply to get into the pants of another woman. So I have had successes and I have had failures but to what its worth the sex was great most of the time. I believe its just the taboo of it which makes it more intense.
Well good luck to all
Hugs
Nicole

[deleted account]

Ashley it appears as if you and I are the only two people communicating here. If you'd like to communicate more directly, I use yahoo messenger quite a bit. I am on there as lisanow2003.

[deleted account]

I felt that way many days and nights during my marriage, particularly during the last several years of the marriage.

Ashley - posted on 11/23/2010

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I do have another question. Since, I am bi and married. It is hard when I am with my husband sexually and I fantasize about being with a woman again. I have my days were I could be with a woman again. Just for the companionship not just for the sex. Have anyone felt that way before?

[deleted account]

Then unfortunately for your libido, you are destined to remain hetero. There's not a thing wrong with that decision; it is a conscious decision to do what you think is right for your marriage. Kudos to you ! Say hello once in a while if you need another understanding ear, other than your friend. Hugs.

Ashley - posted on 11/21/2010

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Lisa, yes I have had that idea before, but when I said something to my friend about it, she said she would never be able to do that. She knows me and my husband very well. We were all friends before him and I got together. I'm normally the one that initates things, or at least of that fashion. My husband would probably get mad just for the fact that I didn't talk to him about it first.

[deleted account]

This will probably cause a lot of controversy, but here goes. For those of you who have a bi-sexual friend as well, have you considered having her seduce your husband, then having her ask for you to join? It might not be the right thing to do for everyone, but you know your husbands. Would he go for it that way? It might open up a new avenue for some of you, but it might also cause some extreme marital strife. It's just a thought for you to dwell upon. Hugs, Lisa (BTW, my ex-husband would have probably been so threatened that he would have balked!).

Ashley - posted on 11/21/2010

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I'm married to a great man, and he knows that I'm bi. He likes it to a certain point, but he would never let me be with a woman at the same. He believes in a monogamy realtionships, and so do I. I've acctually only been with one woman, and she is my best friend. We are still friends, but we have acctually been together in yrs. She knows that I still love her and would love to be with her again. Since my husband knows that I'm bi, sometimes he will put my love for woman into play with us having sex. Sometimes when I go down on him, he will tell me to imagine that I'm eatting a woman out when I'm doing it. I've tried to ask him about us having a threesome with my friend, but everytime we get ready to do it, one of them backs out of it. I would love to find a woman that I could be with at times, but my husband would never go for it. I love the small of a woman, her touch, and everything about them. But there are times that I would just love to have a man strong arms to just take me. It is so hard to be bi-sexual at times.

[deleted account]

WOW! I read all of the comments in this category and was amazed at the differing points of view. In my own opinion, there is nothing wrong with being bi-sexual. However, I have also seen a lot of people being divorced when a 3rd party was brought into a marriage. Enjoy your bi-sexuality, but be aware it might have a price. That's not necessarily fair, but it is life. Hugs

Samantha - posted on 08/03/2010

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lol i know how you feel i have been marid for2 1/2 years it is hard i do sumtimes miss the company of women but i remember how much i love my husband 3sums are out tho lol x

Ashleigh - posted on 07/29/2010

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Hi, I didn't even know this group was out here. - I will preface this with the fact that I've only been with 1 woman and it didn't even go all the way but I am extremely attracted to women and was searching for a female relationship when I met my husband. He loves the fact that I'm bi because we both look at women and stare and he loves it that I'm not jealous because I'd like to be with her too.

I do find myself imagining that he's a woman when we have sex. I really would love to be in a relationship with both. But he considers it cheating if he's not involved. I still imagine the woman I was with all the time, unfortunately she's my best friend and for her it was just a couple drunken nights but for me it really bonded our relationship. Thanks for listening!

Debra - posted on 04/18/2010

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I agree, there is nothing like the touch of a woman. I am quite fortunate. My hubby fully understands my need to be fulfilled ... and he does not seek to interfere in any way. We have been married now for more than 50 years ... and I love him so much... as my two girls {now women with their own families} would attest. But as I said, there is nothing like the touch of another woman. I am so glad that I found this spot... xx to all

Helena - posted on 04/14/2010

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mmmmm Well, for me nothing like a woman touch for another woman and only a woman knows best what other woman feels and need mmmmm
My 2 cents ( but, I'm not fare about this because I'm a Lesbian ! lol )
Wet wet kisses
Helena

Melissa - posted on 04/13/2010

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I haven't been with a male since while I was pregnant with my youngest, four years ago. I don't miss being around a male but sometimes I miss the physical closeness and sort of being handled and led. Sometimes, I want to be taken hard and feel it in me and its "gift." But, I don't like putting up with male egos and some are just plain jerks. Sometimes, you never find out until it's too late. Maybe another way to put it is... I love cock but I can't stand the pricks attached.

David's - posted on 03/17/2010

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YIKES Girl...
I so needed this group.
I feel the same way. Why must we choose...ARG!
Liking both...shit, for that fact loving both is hard. Straight folks make bi-sexuality seem like some greedy way of life and in essence it's the most complicated one sometimes.

I'm dealing but not quite sure exactly how...Just dealing.
But, I often CRAVE bigtime. Have even been offered the other expereince but because of morals I adopted since having my son I've bailed on the good gettings...

Life!
Ladies...
What the hell do we do?????

April - posted on 03/16/2010

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It is hard to find people who are open and want what you want. Usually women who are with men have the stipulation that the man has to join or watch, or women who are with women don't get to play with men. I have a great man I'm engaged to and he is open to me finding a woman to play with. He would like to join as this is his biggest fantasy but it isn't a stipulation. He likes men too so he would like to try it all, he is just a very sexual person. I really miss a woman's touch though and there is something so sensual about a woman that a man just cannot compare to. The sex between my fiance and I is great, lasts too long though. He can go for hours and I'm like "Enough already!" He is very honest and committed to me though and wouldn't cheat with a man or a woman, we have both agreed that if we met someone we wanted to play with we would talk to each other first. I do fantasize about women a lot though, in fact one woman in particular who is a friend that lives in another state. I don't see anything happening between us but boy would I like it to!

Serenity - posted on 02/28/2010

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I'm glad to have come across this post, as it's been a crazy topic of discussion in my relationship right now. I've been with my boyfriend for 2 years, and am recently starting to become really bothered by -not- being with a woman. Before I started dating him, I had been mostly dating women and had basically sworn off men due to my ex-husband, so maybe that plays into it? Even when I* was married before, I had that desire, but not to the extent that I craved it as I do now. It's kinda causing arguments with my BF, and I have gone to bed swo many nights just wishing that I could be just straight or gay. Either way would be easier than this it seems. I am big on monogamy, but have been conflicted as to if I can actually, successfully, live monogomously. I don't know, maybe I'm rambling, but any advice is appreciated.

Abigail - posted on 07/13/2009

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I wouldn't say I'm not satisfied, my husband is amazing and more then I could ever have asked for. But there are days where I really wish I had a girlfriend. It's just because sometimes all you need is a woman to turn to. I know for a fact if we don't work out [I have no reason to believe that will happen but hypothetically] I'm going for women only. If he doesn't work I'm over men lol

Brit - posted on 06/11/2009

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As of right now I'm single. My ex husband says I need to learn how to be content with what I have. So right now, i don't have anyone but really great exs who are there for me. I think right now, thats what I need/want. I do seem to be always discontented if the relationship is in the grey area. Grey meaning, serious enough to only be seeing eachother, but not serious enough to be married. I've always wanted to try an open relationship but it seems finding other people into the idea is harder than just trying to be content with what I have.

Kerri - posted on 06/11/2009

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I completely agree. When ever my fiance and I are fighting and i realize that "all guys are like that" I wish that I had stuck with girls!!

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