Snarkfest

http://snarkfestblog.blogspot.com/

Thoughts from a totally snarkastic mom. Raising 2 teens to be good humans without losing my own humanity...or my mind.

Teri is a winner of Top 25 Funny Moms - 2013

What's the funniest thing your child has ever done or said?

A few weeks ago we were at a friend's house so that the kids could rehearse for a performance they were giving. My 15 year old plays the trumpet, and several other kids in the high school band were performing in a gig in town as part of a Young Artist Series. One of the boys who would be singing and playing guitar was a local kid who made it to Hollywood and was on American Idol for awhile. So my friend and I are sitting on the couch watching all the kids warming up and starting to play. All the teenage girls' eyes were on this boy like he was a giant chocolate cupcake. Except 15. 15 was texting, looking around, not fawning over
this kid, like she could care less. I was joking with my friend saying, "wow, she has no interest in this kid whatsoever." My friend said that she was probably
texting someone about a basketball game or something. She was like the Honey Badger, she didn't give a shit. Fast forward to the end of rehearsal,
the boy left around the same time as us. He shook everyone's hand, nice to meet you, blah blah blah. We got into the car and 15 said: "Oh my God
he's SOOOO HOT!!!" I cracked up!! She said she saw how everyone was looking at him and she didn't want to be all obvious so she was playing it cool.
When we got home she was ALL over Youtube checking him out. I was peeing myself.

What always makes you laugh?

Running with my 15 year old daughter never fails to make me laugh. We start off serious and we get so tired and so loopy that we just start laughing. By the end of the run, we're having a butt-smacking contest, we're exhausted, we're silly and we are making fun of one another. Some of my favorite times have been spent running with her.

Spending ANY time at all with my 13 year old is always good for a laugh because that girl is boy crazy. I can guarantee you, if there's ever a situation where we are at a store, a mall, a restaurant, a baseball game, ANY place at all, she will find a cute boy. Last summer we were at a Phillies game at Nationals Stadium and our seats were in right field. The Nats right fielder is Bryce Harper. Did you know that Bryce Harper is white hot? Apparently my 13 year old thinks so. And she was so excited because at the time, she was 12, she would turn 13 on October 14, and Bryce Harper's 20th birthday was October 16, which meant she and Bryce Harper would BOTH BE TEENAGERS at the same time for 2 days!! Apparently she stood a chance with Bryce Harper for 2 days until he was officially out of his teens.

Watching Criminal Minds with my kids always makes me laugh when 15 says: "You know, I think Morgan would solve the case much quicker if he took off his shirt."

What's the funniest gift you've ever received?

Two years ago for my birthday, my husband surprised me with tickets to see John Pinette perform in DC. I had NO clue where we were going or what we were doing and I was speechless when we arrived at the comedy club and I saw that John Pinette was there. That was an awesome gift and one I will not ever forget. Not only because I LOVE Pinette and he did all new material that I hadn't already heard 14,582 times on XM radio or Youtube, but because I struggled to keep a temporary crown in my mouth.

I had broken a canine a few days before my birthday, and that morning, the dentist took an impression of my mouth to make a permanent implant, but until then he had given me a temporary crown. Said crown came out while we were eating dinner before the show. I tried sticking it back on with Polident (it isn't just for seniors anymore!), and then with chewing gum but that stupid thing would NOT stay in my mouth. I finally just said 'eff this' and put it in my pocket. I spent the entire show laughing my ass off with my hand covering my toothless mouth. I looked like a crazy hillbilly but I had fun.

And it was definitely the funniest gift I ever received.