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Any reservations about breast feeding to start?

Elisha - posted on 12/21/2009 ( 3 moms have responded )

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Hello! I'm due in March and (with luck) planning on breastfeeding my child as long as I can, however there's a small issue I can't seem to get over...

The hubby and I have a strong connection to breasts and our sex life, I don't really want that to change - does it have to? I can't imagine doing one and then the other, no matter how much time or soap happens in between. I'm having strong reservations about it, and I don't think that's normal - aren't all mother's suppose to look forward to it instead of being freaked out? On the one hand, I want my child to have the best possible start, and breast milk is an excellent beginning, on the other, the thought of giving up that part of my relationship with my husband is depressing.

Anybody else have this issue separating meal times for the baby and the sexualization of the breast? I don't think I'd have too many issues with pumping and putting into a bottle, but aren't there drawbacks to that method? Are there benefits I wouldn't know about? This isn't talked about frequently, either you feed directly from the breast or you mix formula in a bottle - one rarely seems to overlap the other.

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3 Comments

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Sarah - posted on 02/11/2010

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I breast feed and did have had problems separating the two!! At 1st i found it weird and wouldn't let my other half near my breasts saying that they now belong to our daughter not him!!! lol!! it took awhile for me to be comfortable with it again!! My other half is strangely aroused when my breasts leak during sex which at 1st put me off completely!! lol!! Eventually i became more comfortable and gave up thinking about the mess and started to find his fascination with my breast quite nice and arousing!!
there's nothing more rewarding than seeing you baby on your breast and having a randy partner!!! lol!! its a great boost for someone that doesn't feel attractive or sexy after giving birth!
Trust me when i say you will eventually be able to separate the two from each other because they are completely different feelings from each other

Emily - posted on 12/22/2009

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Well if you think about it, you yourself will go back and forth between 2 roles.. mother and wife/lover. If you can do it, your breasts can too. ;)

It has never really been an issue for us. I think the problem is, in our culture, breasts are glorified as sex objects and nothing more... we rarely see women using breasts for what they were made for.. feeding a baby! But I think if you just make a shift in your mind that your breasts can do multiple things, you'll be more comfortable with it.

I wouldn't recommend pumping and bottle feeding. That is double the work because not only do you have to pump, but then you have to feed that bottle. It is hard work. Much easier to just learn how to breastfeed. I would recommend attending a LLL meeting in your area, meeting with a LC, or taking a class to learn as much as you can before your baby is born. You can do it if you tell yourself you can.

Good luck and congratulations!

*Fluffy Bunnies - posted on 12/22/2009

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When you have a newborn and your breast are full of milk sex will be the last thing on your mind. Allow yourself some time to adjust to feeding your new baby. When your supply regulates, which is usually around 3 months, your breasts won't be as sore and you may not leak as much so you may be able to include them in your sex life if you and your husband wish. Pumping exclusively is very difficult. It's extremely time consuming because you have to pump then feed the baby then wash/sanitize bottles and pumps. It's so much easier to breastfeed. Pumps are also not as good as keeping up your supply so some moms struggle maintaining a healthy supply by just pumping. I wouldn't make any decisions until your baby is here and you've gotten through the tougher beginning weeks of breastfeeding. I know for me I wouldn't trade the breastfeeding relationship I have with my daughter for anything in the world.

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