"Cry it out method"

Terri - posted on 09/02/2009 ( 56 moms have responded )

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Should i let my baby cry it out as they say? it makes me uneasy to hear her wail at night. She 4mo old and has a hard time falling asleep from 8-11 ish every night. i rock her, sing to her, go outside, and rock her some more. Im out of ideas and sooooo tired! thinking of letter her just cry it out in her bassanett. how long is too long for her to be crying? any advice? tips?

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Schmoopy - posted on 09/02/2009

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The "Cry It Out" method isn't recommended until 6 months. That said, there is a middle ground. Try letting her cry for 5 minutes and then go in to soothe her. Start by patting her rather than picking her up immediately - sometimes a pat is enough and less stimulating / more calming than being held.

Also, are you swaddling her? She may sleep much better if she feels contained. If she has outgrown swaddling blankets (such as the Miracle Blanket), try double swaddling with these blankets from Target - they're a nice, big size: http://www.target.com/Aden-Anais-Jackaro...

To learn how to double swaddle, check this site - they have pictures to show you exactly what to do. And it def works - my baby is pretty strong - he can break out of most swaddling, but not this method...

http://toomuchbluesky.blogspot.com/2007/...

Minnie - posted on 09/02/2009

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Concerning your need for rest, have you considered bedsharing? Wrap yourself around your daughter, latch baby on, drift back to sleep. Simple as pie.

Minnie - posted on 09/02/2009

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It's not a strange coincidence that soporiphic hormones are found in breastmilk. I'm assuming you ARE breastfeeding, correct?



And that means that you are attempting to be sensitive to her emotional and physical needs, correct? Allowing your infant to cry herself to sleep would not be within that realm.



Breastfeeding and sleep for baby go hand-in-hand, and have for as long as there have been humans. Nurse your baby to sleep. It's the way nature intended. She is very vulnerable and needs your help in transitioning her from being awake to the unconsciousness of sleep. Nursing her is the best way to do that.



I have nursed my now ten month old to sleep for both naps and during the night since the day she was born. I couldn't imagine presuming that she did not need to nurse and denying her not only the nutrition and fluids she gets from my milk but the stability, equilibrium, security, and comfort that she does as well.



Imagine yourself as a tiny, vulnerable, barely-out-of-the-womb creature and being very very much in need of the close bodily contact with your lifesource (your mother) and then having your mother leave you alone in the oppressive darkness to pull security and comfort out of the air. How would that make you feel? An infant has no concept of time- to her you would be effectively dead to her- and she barely has a concept of self- she does not see herself as a separate entity from you.



Consider how you would look back on letting your infant daughter cry herself by her lonesome when she is grown and has left you...will you look back on that with fondness? Or would you rather remember rocking her, comforting her with your body, soothing her at your breast?

Shelley - posted on 09/02/2009

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i never let my son cry it out. i tried to try it once but didn't last more then a few minutes... and then i read a lot about it and found that i wasn't alone and that the ferber method is not the only method. it's a very personal decision but i tend to agree with those who say that catering to them when they're crying (at any age and most definitely when they're that young) is paramount to developing a trusting relationship with your child. try visiting this site http://www.pantley.com/elizabeth/ it has some good information and tips. just keep in mind that period will pass, it's temporary and that the time spent addressing his needs now is a worth while investment in your child.

Kim - posted on 09/02/2009

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It all depends if you know that she is safe and not in pain I would let her cry it out. My son is 8 mo old and for exsmple he woke up at 2 am this morning. I went and I nursed him he fell back to sleep and as soon as I put him back in is bed he woke up screaming. So I picked him back up and rocked him for a few minutes and he felp back to sleep. I didn't even get him back in his bed again before he was screaming. I told him mommy needs to rest so that she could take good care of you. I also tolkd him I loved him and I would see him in the morning I rubbed his head shut the door and left. He continued screaming for about 2 hours but he finally settled do and went back to sleep. I knew he was not hungary and I gave him some ibroufen just incase his teeth were bothering him. You need your rest so that you can give her you best. She will get use to the routen you just have to give it time to work. I use to hate bed time for the same reason but now he knows when I put him in his bed it is time to rest. Good Luck I know this is a tough thing to do It makes your heart break to hear them cry that way.

Vicki - posted on 09/02/2009

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No do not let her cry. She NEEDS comfort.

Besides which, the cry it out method isn't meant to be used before six months.

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