Dont touch my breasts!

Christine - posted on 01/27/2010 ( 71 moms have responded )

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Do any other BF moms out there have a problem with their partners touching their breasts?? I have a HUGE issue with it - I keep telling my hubby that they belong to our daughter until she stops BF - and I think its starting to get to bother him (our girl is almost 7mos now and I plan to BF until at least 1 year) Is this normal???

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Tiffany - posted on 01/29/2010

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I am the exact same way! AND I have also "given" my breasts solely to my son. I tell my boyfriend that he can have them back when I've stopped nursing because it is just strange to have him play with them now. It's uncomfortable and honestly kinda awkward for me- I don't like thinking of my nipples sexually since my son gets his nourishment from them.

Monika - posted on 01/29/2010

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You know I am in the same boat, I don't like my fiance touching my breast since I started breast feeding, I don't think that they belong to my daughter like you do but I don't find it a turn-on at all, they have almost become very private

Lara - posted on 01/29/2010

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Hubby loves my breast when I'm pregnant and nursing (must be a "big boob" thing for guys), but he doesn't get to touch them 'cause it's so uncomfortable for me. He calls it torture but once I sat him down after our first daughter and explained to him why I was so uncomfortable physically (let down reflex, sore, engorged, etc) and it wasn't just cruel and unusual punishment I was giving him, he was okay with it.

Just talk to him. It's not about your breasts "belonging" to either your child or your husband. They belong to you. And if you are uncomfortable with physical touching of them while you are nursing, just tell him so. But be prepared to answer the follow-up question of "why" with a logical response.

On this same thread, what is with female family members thinking they can touch your breasts while you are nursing? Touch baby's head or feet, just keep your fingers off my boobs! scheeze!

Renee - posted on 01/28/2010

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I guess my husband is the oddball here. I would love him to touch my breasts during intimacy but he is the one who refuses because they are for our daughter's nourishment at the moment.

Becky - posted on 01/28/2010

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I think the most important thing is open and honest communication between you and hubby. We have struggled through the same issues. I also keep a bra on because of leakage. I find that when I communicate to him...in a nice, intimate way, that he is able to receive what I am saying. But, I have found that it is not beneficial to either of us if I just say a flat out 'No'. So, we work through what is comfortable for both of us. Sometimes we would open the flap of the nursing bra, and then if I started leaking, I would just replace the pad and bra, and we would move on to other things.
Be honest about the sensitivity as well, which parts are too sensitive to touch, which parts are safe. It seems that if hubby knows that you want to please him, he will be more willing to be sensitive to your needs. I don't think he wants to make you uncomfortable, he is just wanting to enjoy the current size and shape (my hubby sure does). :) Work with him...don't make it into a battle or pit him against the baby. Resentment could unwillingly grow between him and the little one.

Miranda - posted on 01/28/2010

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The thought of my husband touching my breasts is no longer a turn on AT ALL. I wear a nursing bra 24x7 except for right before and right after i get out of the shower. Its literally the last thing I take off and first thing put on after drying. I have a very strong letdown and I've told my husband they are on LOAN to our son until he's done BF. My son is only 8 weeks old now, and perhaps as he gets bigger and starts nursing in longer intervals I might start feeling different, but since I plan to bf for at least 12 months, I've told him not to get his hopes up for awhile. :)

Sara - posted on 01/28/2010

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I keep my bra on all the time, too. I don't have a problem with my husband messing with mine, as long as he understands the risks associated with doing so. lol.

Ashley - posted on 01/28/2010

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I keep a bra on at all times. (besides in the shower) But my husband has seemed to find a new love for them. I guess its cause they are REALLY big now. I just tell him I'll squirt him, then he backs off. I think it creeps him out. I'd say if he really wants them then hes got to be respectful of your wishes and maybe some really light tuching wont be so bad. Gotta keep Daddy a little happy too.

Amanda - posted on 01/28/2010

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Haha! I feel the same way, less now that my son is older (22 months) but when he was younger they were off limits, they belonged to my baby then. Now, they aren't off limits anymore, but I don't really like having them touched anymore. I don't know if it's because they get so abused during the day (pinching, nursing, groping, driving cars on them... ;) that it just doesn't feel good to have them touched anymore, or if they just don't feel sexual to me while my son is using them for nourishment... I'm so glad I'm not the only mom who feels this way!

Amy - posted on 01/28/2010

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seriously, i don't mind my breasts as long as he doesn't touch tits. last thing i want is a letdown when trying to be romantic. hands aren't too big an issue, but no licks. it makes me think of my son and is a moodkill. i'm sure one day hubby'll get them back.

Marla - posted on 01/28/2010

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I didn't really have a problem with my husband wanting to touch my breasts while I was breastfeeding. He was too afraid he would get squirted with breast milk, and he was grossed out by the thought of accidentally tasting it. I was the one that was disappointed, because him touching my breasts was always something I enjoyed immensely. We got through it, though!

Melanie - posted on 01/28/2010

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I have a problem with it, but only because mine are very sensitive and usually painful. I wear a nursing bra 24x7 (unless I am showering) and that seems to help. But definitely no touching!

[deleted account]

I feel the same...My nipples are too sensitive and I overproduce so I am always leaking it kinda grosses me out to have milk everywhere all the time so i like to keep a bra on even in bed. It still doesn't stop him from trying though...lol

Emma - posted on 01/28/2010

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It drives me crazy when my husband wants to touch my breasts. He doesn't understand how I feel about it, although I've repeatedly told him, and tries to do it anyways. He gets upset sometimes and says things like "I was here first", my response "too bad right now they are for milk and nothing else".

Lindsay - posted on 01/28/2010

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I feel like I wouldnt want someone 'groping' my food so why would I want him 'groping' my sons food. I agree that right now thye have another use, and when they arent needed for food they can go back to belonging to my husband.

Kyle - posted on 01/27/2010

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he might be just getting a little jealous. It's just me but I am okay with my husband messing with mine as long as he ...doesn't make a mess! and he understands that if he unleashes the beasts he might get wet! Sometimes I squirt him just for fun! haha. but i do hope things get better for you and he starts to understand how you feel.

Becky - posted on 01/27/2010

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I'm not crazy about my husband touching my breasts either. I don't really tell him they're off limits, but I just don't find it turns me on when I'm nursing. They tend to be a little more sensitive too, so him playing with my nipples really does not feel good to me. Poor guy though, I have been either pregnant or nursing since a month after we got married, so he pretty much lost any claim to my boobs when we said, "I do"!

[deleted account]

haha- I am the same way, they are also "out of commission". They have another purpose for now...

Adrienne - posted on 01/27/2010

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I don't have a problem with my husband touching my breasts at all. They are a part of me, as well as there to produce milk for my kiddo. I warned him he may get sprayed in the face...

but so long as it isn't physically uncomfortable for me, or interfering with my breastfeeding relationship with my son, I don't see why things should be any different now than before we had kids.

Chrystal - posted on 01/27/2010

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I think it is perfectly normal. Both my husband and I felt the same way about my breasts. They were "out of commission" to him while they were getting the job done for my son. I have just recently weaned him, or my breasts weaned themselves :) He is 14 months now and my milk supply had a hard time keeping up to my work schedule and his decreasing need for milk.

Either way although I am sad that part is over for now My husband is happy to have them to himself now.

It is such a short time in the grand scheme of things. Enjoy the feeding you have with your baby, I hope that your husband remains supportive :) He will have them to himself soon enough ;)

Jocelyn - posted on 01/27/2010

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I don't have this problem, but I remember my mom telling me she felt that way...my poor dad (she nursed my sister and I for almost 5 years combined! lol)

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