Feeling a bit overwhelmed and guilty because I am drying up?

Lizzette - posted on 08/07/2011 ( 20 moms have responded )

5

30

0

I am a first time mom and have been supplementing formula since 4 1/2 months and she is now 5 months 1 week. I am drying up due to not being able to just stay home and feed because I am a full time student while hubby works and goes to school too. I can't get anything out if the pump anymore and have been taking reglan but can't during the day because it makes me a walking zombie so I am also taking more milk plus and it doesn't seem to be doing as much as I'd like but i feel like giving up but guilty to just stop.

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Lydia - posted on 08/08/2011

432

14

46

if you can't keep pumping you still can continue to breastfeed at home... even if it is only 1-2 times a day your body should adjust. as long as you'll feed some your milk shouldn't dry up (not being able to pump doesn't mean you don't have milk...) breastfeed your daughter as much as you can, even if it is only for waking up milk and a bedtime feed!

Ania - posted on 08/11/2011

703

25

52

Megan obviously you have some issues with it. If you don't believe anything is realted to breastfeeding it's fine. I've read enough research to see connections. I believe that every action has consequences I'm not saying that she is a bad mother, she can do whatever she wants. I don't understand why we have to fight about her decision. I don't have to support what she is doing I can tolerate it, that's all. you don't have to agree with me and I don't have to agree with you I'm happy that your daughter is doing well and if you don't believe that kidney reflux could be related to breastfeeding that's fine too I'm not saying it is, but did you think what is in the water that you prepare formula with for example? All kinds of metals, chlorine that could possibly affect kidneys- that's just my head spinning and not research.... I'm not trying to push any ideologies, if you feel offended sorry that was not my intention, I'm not trying to call anyone a bad mother, but there is so much information out there it is only a matter of finding the real research and not myths and educate yourself that's all.

Heather - posted on 08/09/2011

534

65

0

Don't feel guilty. Your daughter will be fine. You are doing what is right for you and your family. Babies on formula do just as well as breastfed babies. You are going to school now, and your daughter will thank you for that later, when she can talk. Keep up the good work and stay in school! I am proud of you.

If you see this, leave this form field blank.
Powered by RESPECT not THUMPS

20 Comments

View replies by

Brooke - posted on 08/25/2011

869

26

41

try motilium? you have to get it from the Dr but it keeps your milk supply up.. Im on it all the time for low supply

[deleted account]

I pumped for over six months when I went back to work and it's hard work even if you have enough milk, so fair play to you for doing this for your LO! I think kellymom.com has a good bit of advice on how to increase your milk supply (though if that'll help with pumping is a different story, your body might just not respond to a pump very well). If pumping ends up not working for you you can still nurse when you are at home. I don't see how it has to be all or nothing. Whatever works for you will be good enough in the end - we all have to make choices and it's not like you are making this one lightly. Good luck to you.

♥♪Megan♫♥ - posted on 08/13/2011

6,434

12

67

Lizzette, Good luck. And don't feel bad about whatever you have to do because you're doing something to make a better life for your daughter by going to school.

Lizzette - posted on 08/13/2011

5

30

0

Thank you guys for all the wonderful advice and support I'm not giving up quite yet!

♥♪Megan♫♥ - posted on 08/12/2011

6,434

12

67

The best advice I can give is to stay hydrated and see if your child will try to latch on for longer periods of time. I started drying up last month because I just don't drink enough fluids. I started drinking 2 litres of water or some other liquid a day. My daughter also started nursing for longer periods like she did when she was bringing my milk in after I had her. If that doesn't work, do what you can and don't feel guilty if you have to suppliment.

Lise - posted on 08/12/2011

1,738

8

233

Ania and Megan, maybe you guys want to continue your conversation separately... It's not really addressing Lizzette's question anymore.



I would also point out that this is the breastfeeding support group. The support provided here should come from the point of supporting the breastfeeding relationship, not recommending formula. That's why she's asking her question here.

Ania - posted on 08/12/2011

703

25

52

Why would I have I told you so moment. I can guarantee you I wouldn't because I don't know everything, but you feel that you do, it seems to me. I never say that someone is a bad parent if they don't try hard, how do I know how hard they try? It's not my position to judge someone's effort. Some people need to hear that others were in the same or worse situation, that certainly kept me going when my son didn't latch for the first week. When I heard how hard the other women situation was I thought I will keep going because my situation is not as hard somebody else's. Megan I never said or implied that you are bad mother I don't know why and how you got that impression, obviously you must feel guilty or something if all you see is that I'm critisizing you. I'm not. Every mother does the best she can, everyone loves their babies, And you are right let's just quit this nonsense.

♥♪Megan♫♥ - posted on 08/12/2011

6,434

12

67

Ania, I've never tried to make you sound like a breast feeding nazi- but the reaction you've had to me stating that I gave my older daughter formula was making it seem like I'm the bad parent and anyone who doesn't try harder isn't doing enough for their child. I tried! But I was under so much stress from personal stuff (my ex husband was in Iraq oh and cheating on me) so I had enough to deal with. I never tried to make you seem like a bad person. The whole "I don't agree with what she's doing but I'll tolerate it' doesn't help.

So now you want to know why I breastfeed because I don't believe the way you do about breastfeeding? And you wonder why I construe you as rude. Okay fine. My baby took to it, it's easier than bottle feeding, she won't take bottles or dummies. I don't know how to explain to you without you having some insane I told you so moment so you know what? I won't continue.

Ania - posted on 08/12/2011

703

25

52

Megan, all the things you say in your posts make a breastfeeding nazi out of me, but that is the portrait that you paint of me by saying that I believe that formula is poison or I think that you are a bad mother if you dont breastfeed. Notice that those are things that you said, not me. Please don't try to put words in my mouth. Obviously you have some very strong feelings on breastfeeding, that's fine, but please don't try to make me look like a monster. Every baby is different and I feel for you...My son did not sleep through the night until he was 12 months old. but that has nothing to do with the way babies are fed. that's actually research....If you guys are healthy even though you were not breastfed, that's great! you probably have a good diet and good lifestyle. On water - you know that bottled water is not regulated in the US which means that a lot of brands are just tap filtered water. Also by the way you are responding to my posts I feel attacked by you. I don't understand why. Everyone should be entitled to their opinion we don't have to agree on everything. I never called you a bad mother or i myself never felt like I'm superior to women that don't breast feed. You on the other hand made assumptions and called me rude. I have one question. Why do you breastfeed if you don't see any benefits plus your baby doesn't sleep like your formula fed baby? Why you put yourself through the hardship of breastfeeding?

Lise - posted on 08/11/2011

1,738

8

233

I would try to troubleshoot your pump (what pump is it?) or try hand expression. If that doesn't work, the first poster is right - you can bf when you're together and give formula when you're apart. I personally think breast milk is liquid gold and ANY amount your lo gets is priceless. Breast milk is so healthy for babies and breastfeeding is healthy for moms - the longer you go, the more health benefits you get.

♥♪Megan♫♥ - posted on 08/11/2011

6,434

12

67

Ania, I used bottled water as I was instructed for mixing the formula or used filtered water. I'm not about to use tap water for a baby. Give me some credit. And reading that are you saying you don't drink unfiltered water either?

I just have an issue that you seem to believe that formula=poison and that I did something wrong by feeding that to my daughter. As I said before I was ADOPTED and my mother used formula on both myself and my brother. You seem to have skipped that neither of us had anything more than chicken pox. My husband on the other hand was breastfed and he got pnumonia 3 times and bronchitis. He now has chronic bronchitis because of the scarring in his lungs. I believe it has to do with the individual person and DNA not just whether they were breastfed or bottlefed.

Besides, my 5 month old is breastfed or bottlefed with breastmilk and she is the most colicky baby I have ever met! She won't sleep through the night, she'll cry for an hour without stopping. I never had that issue with my formula fed daughter who started sleeping through the night at 4 months.

♥♪Megan♫♥ - posted on 08/11/2011

6,434

12

67

Ania, My brother and I were never breastfed and with the exception of Chicken Pox and 1 case of pnuemonia neither of us had any issues with ear infections or other serious illnesses. Of course my mom didn't have a choice.

I had a choice with my older daughter and she wasn't breastfed more that 3 months. No ear infections. 1 case of pink eye and kidney reflux which I don't believe has anything to do with breastfeeding or not. She's almost 7 and has had no serious illnesses or any missed days from school.

And saying yes you were find on formula but maybe you'd be better on breastmilk is kind of rude. Some people don't have a choice and can't exactly worry about 'consequences' later on becuase their child has to be fed now. Are we going to assume that children raised with biological parents are better off than adopted children simply because they can potentially be breastfed unlike adopted children?

IMO using words like consequences for someone's actions make it sound like not being able to breastfeed and giving a child formula makes someone a failure as a mother and that they're hurting their children.

Ania - posted on 08/11/2011

703

25

52

Megan, maybe it sounds like I'm making her guilty, but it is not my place to make her feel guilty. I'm just saying that if you know that something is better you should do whatever you can to continue. Of course you are fine on formula, but who knows maybe you could be better if you were breasfed, right? I was also breastfed for only 3 months, maybe I would be smarter if I was breastfed for a year, or maybe I would not have to take series of painful shots every year because I was constantly sick when I was little- ear, throat type diseases - which are linked to being breastfed or not, immunity etc....there is a lot of if. If you are making decisions - any decisions there are always consequences and you should own it. thats all

♥♪Megan♫♥ - posted on 08/10/2011

6,434

12

67

Ania I'm sorry but I think that's horrid to imply that Lizzett is setting her child up for failure because she's unable to breastfeed due to school scheduling. You'll make her feel guilty even if that wasn't your intention. That's really quite rude. I was formula fed because I'm ADOPTED and I'm just fine. I have 2 girls of my own and I wasn't able to breast feed my older one because she just wouldn't latch on and was losing weight after being a low birth weight baby in the first place. And I don't feel one bit guilty that she had formula instead of breast milk.

I feel that it's downright rude and presumptious to imply that a mother isn't doing all she can for her child simply because she isn't breastfeeding. Are you going to say that I'm not doing all that I can for my 5 month old because she gets a bottle of formula on long drives? I have no choice because on some roads in British Columbia there is no place to pull over unless you prefer falling off a cliff. Are you going to say that I should pressure my sister in law into breastfeeding her son because it turned out well for me?

Breastfeeding is a choice that we all decided on for our children, but we should be supportive of other moms who can't do it or don't want to do it. We shouldn't imply that their children will suffer because of their choice, because that's just wrong.

Ania - posted on 08/10/2011

703

25

52

I don't know what school do you go to, but i was a student too and I set up my classes 3 times a week and still was able to breastfeed I never supplemented. Obviously this is not contest, do whatever you have to do that's my advice and if you feel guilty, you have to deal with that guilt, that's it. I won't tell you don't feel guilty because that will not fix it. you know what are the benefits of breatfeeding right? if you are giving up for any reason you know what the consequences might be. On the other hand if you feel like you can't do it anymore, you just can't, end of story. I would never quit, because if ...in the future my child would end up having cancer, or any other disease that let's face it are almost in 50% environmental, I would blame myself for not giving him a good start and maybe not preventing it...Those are only my thoughts and no matter how hard it was for me and how tired I was in that first year I never quit, but I was complaining a ton!

April - posted on 08/09/2011

1

24

0

Domperidone can be purchased online from a compounding pharmacy. Just have your Dr write a prescription for it. No side effects like Reglan & works great. I live in NJ & called Randal Mill Pharmacy in Arlington, Texas. They filled it right away after I faced the prescription & I got it in 2 days. It is working great! Don't feel bad though, just do the best you can, eat oatmeal, & I drink yogi tea / nursing woman's support & take fenugreek supplements which have done wonders. I'm even leaking again which is a good sign'

♥♪Megan♫♥ - posted on 08/08/2011

6,434

12

67

Don't feel guilty. My first daughter didn't take to breast feeding at all so I attempted it for 3 months along with formula.

I'm a stay at home mom due to the fact I just moved to Canada from the US, but I started to go down a bit when I went off maternity leave with my 2nd because I also supliment with formula and hated the manual pump that I had. I also started to dry up after I moved up here because I just don't drink enough fluids. My baby (she's 5 months now) just started nursing longer, maybe to help bring the milk in better. See if you can get your baby to nurse longer, that could help bring the milk in better. Also try to drink more fluids because being dehydrated can affect milk production too.

Just don't feel guilty if you can't breastfeed for as long as you wanted to because things like this will happen.

If you see this, leave this form field blank.
Powered by RESPECT not THUMPS

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms