HELP! Iam trying to wean my 13 month old from the breast and he won't let me!

Kari - posted on 02/18/2010 ( 8 moms have responded )

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I am looking for advice on how to wean my 13 month old off of breastfeeding. I have tried gradually cutting it down but he refuses to drink milk and throws his cup and screams until I nurse him....any advice on how to wean and stop this would be greatley appreciated! I just think its time to stop, dont get me wrong i love the bonding time with him still but i would like a little more freedom now that he is older and i cant pump because i get very little out.....so i need to be there with him....Please give me any advice or tips any of you have!

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Erin - posted on 02/18/2010

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The best way that i have found to wean a child off the breast is to have some on eother than you feed him. I have found that the baby feels if you are holding them than you should be given the breast but if you have someone else feed him than they have no choice but to take the bottle if that makes any cents to you. guess what im sayn is if he smells your milk hes gona want it

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Maddy - posted on 03/04/2010

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I agree with the gradual approach. When my son got busy and active he forgot to bf during the day, so we were down to just morning and night. Then he started skipping mornings and eventually nights. I didn't want any neg associations with it by forcing him. If he'd ask for mild during the day I'd suggest an alternative, which worked most of the time. Good luck!

April - posted on 02/19/2010

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my advice is to wait until he is 18 months old before trying again. give weaning a go again in the summer. the reason i suggest this is because 18 months is just about the earliest time for "self-weaning".

most self-weaners do so between 18 and 24 months.

i just think that it will be easier on you if you wait until summer.

also because he isn't taking milk in a cup for you, it is unfair to force him to wean without having a back up to breast milk.

Brittany - posted on 02/19/2010

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You are the mom, you are the adult, he is a child. If you give him the cup and he throws a fit then let him throw a fit, as long as he isn't hurting himself then let him scream b/c if you keep giving in then he'll know that if he screams enough he'll get his way, it sux and its hard but sometimes you gotta give them tough love...when he gets hungry he'll calm down and drink from the bottle, he'll drink from the bottle before he goes hungry. Good Luck.

Angela - posted on 02/18/2010

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I agree with the idea that he's probably rebelling more than needing to nurse. My daughter was the worst she is very strong willed.She wouldn't take any nipple other than mine for the longest. But I did manage to gradually ween all her day nursings with a bottle. It wasn't easy because even at a year old she nursed throughout the day. I was her pacifier. Once I got her to do that I just kept telling her that it was all gone and held her and kissed her through it. It was hard but surprisingly it only took a few nights. Sometimes if your will becomes as strong as theirs and you love them through it, it works. Good luck!

Melinda - posted on 02/18/2010

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hes probably just rebelling against this change. Babies his age thrive off routine and youre changing something. I hate to make this analogy, but its just like a whining dog. The dog whines, you give it what it wants and then they learn what to do to make you give them what they want.

Tammy - posted on 02/18/2010

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How are you weening? I would start with just one feed a day. start by feeding him a bit, then offering the bottle while holding him in breastfeeding position. once he does this once or twice you can give him only a bottle for that feed. Once he's taken a bottle for a few days you can swap out another feed. and keep doing that until he's taking the bottle for every feed. Are you using milk or formula? you may want to consider formula as it's very close to breast milk.

Nyssa - posted on 02/18/2010

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Wow, I haven't had that problem with weaning any of mine gradually. You said he throws his cup? Will he take a bottle with you holding him? I know it would be easier to just go straight to a cup, but maybe that would work. Have you tried only a certain feeding to cut out, or all at different times. Maybe you are picking a harder time for him to stop. I usually have my kids down to 3-4 nursings a day before I start to wean, and the noon time seems to be the easiest one to stop first. Hopefully this all goes well. I know what you mean about wanting a little more freedom. :) Trying a little later (a couple weeks or so) might help, too.

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