How can i get my baby to sleep more?

Rebecca - posted on 04/14/2009

With all of our kids we did a bassinet next to the bed so I could breastfeed in bed easily at night.  I feel like just pulling them into bed and nursing them right back to sleep helped naturally reinforce the idea that nighttime is for sleeping.  When we tried different rooms with a couple of them, everone would wake all the way up each time.  All of us got so much more rest this way and my kids quickly learned that nighttime is not playtime.  As you both get used to it, studies have shown that you can actually nurse the baby without fully waking up.

When my youngest was 9 months old, we "sleep trained" her with much help from the book "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" by Dr. Marc Weissbluth.  AMAZING BOOK.  It is full of practical advice AND how to train your child to sleep without the miserable controlled crying.  I made sure my daughter got plenty of sleep for about 2 weeks and made sure we were comfortable with her scheduled nap and bed times, then started letting her put herself to sleep with her morning nap.  IT WENT AMAZINGLY.  She fussed but NEVER cried with distress, I swear.  I do not handle my children crying alone well, which is why I never attempted to get my older two to put themselves to sleep. 

Anyway, the book has way too much info for me to try to summarize here, but it is just filled with great info and actual evidence (and historical evidence) about what babies need for sleep, etc.  One of  the most informative books I've read.  He does not like controlled crying as it takes a long time and is extremely stressful on all involved.  He thinks cosleeping is fine as long as everyone is comfortable and sleeping.  I found that my kids loved being in our bed during the little baby stage and it helped teach them, but there was a point for each of them when it was clear they weren't getting the best sleep there (and then neither were we). 

Anyway, the book has just so much info on what is normal for each age, etc.  I wish I'd discovered it long ago. 

Ooh, one last thing.  It made all the difference when we started putting our baby down no later than 6:30.  She is 14 months and still is in bed by then.  If you wait until too late, there will definitely be problems getting to sleep!

Good luck, and remember that many kids don't have natural schedules until 4 months!

Julia - posted on 04/14/2009

Are you doing a four hourly feeding routine during the whole day too???  you say you are feeding him at 1 pm and 5 pm.  I found getting them into a routine with the feeding the sleeping and up time naturally followed.   I think he's also getting woken up at night by you too!!!  how bout thinking of putting him to sleep in his own bed at night!!   I also found if they woke during the day before their feed time I would leave them there...sometimes they would fall back to sleep but if they were crying for more than 15min I would go in and get them up.

Yes they do go through growth spurts and you have to allow for that...that  means the routine goes out the window for a few days....it only takes 2-3 days for your milk supply to increase...which is when you start to get the routine back again.

Hope these ideas are of some help.

Itsamystery - posted on 04/14/2009

Babies also go through a growth spurt at 12 weeks, which sounds like when it started, so 3-4 months can be a tough time. Perhaps his 3 & 4 growth spurts have kind of merged together. I think you're doing a great job and that it should settle down soon. When did you go back to work? This might also have caused a change in his sleeping patterns...

Linda - posted on 04/14/2009

Thanks for the tips, will definately try them... you never know i might find myself having a good sleep after so long.

The started this 3.5 weeks ago.

Itsamystery - posted on 04/14/2009

Oh.. I forgot to mention, babies go through a growth spurt at 4 months which can last anywhere between 2 and 10 days... is his waking 6x per night new or has he always woken this often?

Itsamystery - posted on 04/14/2009

At 4 months old my son was nursing about 8-10 x per day... perhaps because you are working, he's trying to get all his nursing in at night? I'd suggest offering him the breast every hour between when you get home from work and when you put him down to sleep so that he can get as much nursing in as possible during waking hours. I'd also suggest giving him a dream feed when you go to bed. Hopefully that will help decrease the amount of times he wants to nurse throughout the night.

You could try offering him just a cuddle and a back rub every second time he wakes up at night. You might find that this just doesn't work (it didn't with my son) and unsettles you and him both, which isn't what you want if you've got to get up for work in the morning. He's still so young, and he WILL grow out of such frequent night feeds, so hang in there.

With the naps, that's not so unusual, he'll probably settle down into one longer nap as he gets older. And as PP's have mentioned, making the room darker will help. If you can't get blinds, you could just attach a blanket to the curtain rail to give extra light blockage.

It's a huge effort to work with a young baby, whether or not they are sleeping well, so kudos to you.

Hayley - posted on 04/14/2009

Try using black out blinds and once he is awake during the day do not got to him, unless he is distressed. Leave him to resettle himself back to sleep. Unfortunately, babies are not built with an inbuilt sleep function - it's something they learn.

Linda - posted on 04/14/2009

During the day the room is very bright because of the windows (even if i close the curtains). At night i switch off  the light and leave a very dim candle burning so that i see.

how do i make a room dark during the day?

Lisa - posted on 04/13/2009

when you put him to sleep during the day is it in a dark room?

i found that my son was the same until i made the room darker, he then slept for 2-3hrs at a time

Linda - posted on 04/13/2009

Thanks to you all. i never thought motherhood can be this tiring

My baby is 4 months today. I'm a working mom so i breast feed him at 1 pm and 5pm and during the night. When i'm at work he takes fomula. I'm thinking of starting to give him 1 solid meal this month once a day.

He doesnt cry to show that someting might be wrong. He sleeps in his own crib during the day and co-sleep with me during the night. When i put him done to sleep during the day, he just sleeps for 20mins and when he wakes up he just blink his eyes without even crying when he notices that i'm there. At night  its a bit different he cries a bit when he wakes up and only goes back to sleep after a cuddle or a feed....... 6 times or more a night!!

Hayley - posted on 04/13/2009

Easier said than done, but have you tried controlled crying? How old is your baby?

Amanda - posted on 04/13/2009

is he sleeping in his own bed?swaddled, warm. those all worked for me

Lisa - posted on 04/13/2009

My 6-month old is doing essentially the same (and is also a completely breastfed baby)... esp in the nap department. He takes 3-4 30 mins naps during the day and hasn't strayed from that schedule in the last 4 months. And he's a happy baby.

We're starting to see an improvement at night, but that's only because we're trying a little tough love. Once I put him to bed at 7:30pm, and after a FULL feeding, I'm not the one who goes in if he wakes before 12:30am/1am, when I'll feed him again. I do think he needs to eat at least once in the night (sometimes I give in and feed him twice). He's now starting on two meals a day, so while I don't think solids contribute to sleeping through the night, I know he'll have enough food to get him through the night. I feel a little more comfortable refusing to feed him and only work on comforting him in his crib.

I know I don't have much advice, other than trying some of the sleep methods, I just wanted you to know I'm going through the same thing... you are not alone.

Sabrina - posted on 04/13/2009

How old is your baby? Are you strictly breastfeeding? Maybe he is still hungry?