how do i reverse a 3mo olds sleep routine? help

Elisa - posted on 01/22/2010 ( 11 moms have responded )

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he breastfeeds and loves to sleep rite on my chest or next to me durning the nite. and then he only sleeps for 45 min then he'll wake up and play for two hours threw the nite. I literally dont go to bed until about 7am, please help!

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Be sure he nurses often during the day...every 2-3 hours. Even in his sleep he should be picked up and nursed. They never really "skip" a feeding...they will make up for it somewhere during the day or for sure during the night.

Melisa - posted on 01/23/2010

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I asked my doctor about this. My son doesn't stay awake like yours does at night. He's up every 2 hours around the clock to feed, but her suggestions might be helpful to you too. She recommended keeping him awake as much as possible in the 8-10 hours before bedtime so that he'll be tuckered out at bedtime. Then have a bedtime routine that's different than naptime routines so he'll be able to figure out what's expected. For me, he still wakes up to feed as often, but he goes to sleep better and quicker after each feeding and he doesn't feed as long during the night. I have him in a bassinet right next to my side of the bed so I can easily get to him and just use a night light so that I don't need to turn on lights to see what I'm doing. I don't say anything to him or interact other than to feed him and check his diaper. I find that he stays asleep better if he's swaddled tightly as well. He cries when I am in the process of swaddling him, but once he's swaddled and I start feeding him, he calms right down and when he's done eating goes to sleep. I recommend Swadle Me's because they don't come undone if he wiggles.
So our routine is daddy gives him a bath and puts him in his pjs. Then I swaddle, feed, and burp him and put him in his bassinet. He usually squirms for a second or two and is out. If he seems to be getting aggitated instead of calming down when he's squirming, I give him his pacifier and that does the trick almost every time. Well, good luck and hope this helps!

Jessica - posted on 01/23/2010

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How is he in the day? Is he awake much? If not then he has his nights and days mixed up! Which is normal, and now is a good time to get him out of this routine.

In the day, plenty of stimulation while hes awake, bright colourful toys, tv on, talking and eye contact and talking and singing to him.

To get him to sleep on his own, even in the day is essential, once you see his tired signs, swaddle him if he likes it, and then put him down, read him a story/sing to him or something similar for a few moments with NO eye contact, and then leave the room. If he cries, wait a few moments to see if he settles himself, if not, go in to him and reassure him, pick him up if you need to but only until he is calm, then put him back down.

repeat this as often as necessary, he will learn to go to sleep on his own.



At night, keep the lights dim, dont talk and dont make eye contact. Feed him and then put him back into bed,

Use the same process as in the day, minus the talking and singing, keep going back to him as often as necessary for him to be reassured. It can take up to a week to change a babies sleeping patterns so keep it up, even if it keeps you up (which it sounds like you already are anyway! if this doesnt help then maybe consider going for a few nights to a triscillian centre (or something similar if your not in NSW) they are wonderful and ive known many family members who go there and come out with a baby in a perfect routine! Good luck!

Elisa - posted on 01/22/2010

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thanks again. I agree with the swaddling and i gave him a bath and feed him so im hopin he sleeps long and its 9pm now. he sleeps a little more during the moring and wake sup and plays during the day, then goes back to sleep at nite after dinner and then wakes up after midnite and plays for two hours so i dont think he's confused i think he likes the boob and then he just gets a burst of energy. but i will try what you guys are sayin and let you know how it goes thanks a bunch.

Janet - posted on 01/22/2010

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SWADDLE...SWADDLE....SWADDLE, yes even at 3 months....try incorporating into your bed and naptime routine. My daughter was swaddled super tight (the tighter the better) starting at 6 weeks till almost 5 months. She loved it!!! At first I didn't think it would help with her but after she finally missed a feeding the first night we swaddled her I was a believer, she now sleeps 12-14 hours every night at 6 months!!! I read the book "The happiest baby on the block" and it was very helpful and quite a quick read! Good luck!

Elissa - posted on 01/22/2010

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I agree with just about everything but I wouldn't go down the route of supplementing with formula. He might sleep better but only because he's stuffed with junk. If you successfuly breastfeed stick with that. The problem doesn't seem to be hunger or he would be feeding constantly. I love the lavender talcs and sometimes put some on the sheet under him to help him settle. Another thing that can settle them is Karvol which is a decongestant but is also soothing (ironically its quite stimulating for most adults although I use Vicks for insomnia myself)

How much does he sleep during the day. The biggest issue seems to be he is confused about when he should be up. Most of our suggestions wont work immediately - he needs to be reeducated about appropriate playtime and that takes time, effort and lots of your energy. Try tag teaming with dad if he's available. Some dad use the excuse that they work and your are on maternity but parenting is full time 24/7 for both of you. It wont get any less when you are back at work o and you dont want him getting the idea that you will do all the night stuff. Again its fair enough if baby needs fed but this doesnt seem to be your problem.

Zenetta - posted on 01/22/2010

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Rice cereal works for some but it's not recommend before 4 months b/c it's hard to digest and b/c of possible allergies also some docs don't even want you to put it in their bottles. You need to do what works for you. Monitor for any rashes that my occur, check his belly to make sure it's not distended, and monitor his bowel movements to make sure he's still going. If the cereal doesn't work you can try Enfamil Restful is designed for the bed time bottle. The formula thickens to make them feel fuller longer. As for the sleep routine right before my sons 11pm feeding I change his diaper, put on his pj's, swaddle him, and rub johnson and johnson lavender lotion on the blanket so he can smell the relaxing aroma then I give him his bottle. After a week or so of doing this he was out before I could even burp him. I actually did this the other day around his 8pm feeding to calm him down b/c he was so fussy and I guess he had made the connection and fell asleep for the next 5 hours. Anyhow as far as the middle of the night feeding I agree don't turn on the light try not to interact to much feed him and lay him down. you can try rubbing some more lotion to help relax him, and if you're going to keep him in bed I would purchase a secure sleeper to put in your bed due to possible suffocation, trust me I work in the ER and it DOES happen. It's a terrible tragedy than can be avoided 100%. Here's a link to one that they sell at target it's under baby secure and safety. I have it and 's it' wonderful it even has a small night light at the top of the bed to see him easier, and if he doesn't like the dark you can leave it on all night it shouldn't disturb your sleep. Best of luck

http://www.target.com/Health-Safety-Baby...

Elissa - posted on 01/22/2010

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I know some people swear by stuffing them to sleep, other it doesnt work for. I think anything at all is worth a go. What is your evening routine like - we try to get lots of playing done up til about 9 then its bath, feed, stories and bed. We basically try to nacker him out then get settled.

When do you put him to sleep? We tied 8.30 ish and it really didn't work so bumped it back to 10/11pm. He likes a quick nap about 8 but no more than that. So maybe baby isnt ready to go to bed yet? Also do you go to bed same time as him - I know a few women who do. I try to put him down then have a couple of hours adult time and sneak into bed, trying not to disturb him.

Another thing I only just realised is their environment is hugely important. Struan is currently in with me and Stephen is in spare room because his crib is too small but the cot isnt here yet. He was wakening up because he didnt have enough room and maybe if he is snuggled right into you although he is comfy to go to sleep he might need more room once he is asleep.

I'm pretty much out of ideas now, but if any more come along I'll pass them along. Good luckx

Elisa - posted on 01/22/2010

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Thanks soo much for your ideas. I have done that exact same thing, but i literally laid there for almost 1 1/2 hours listening to him google in the dark so i finally jus let him do in the living room with a soft lite. he doesnt like the dark. I am feeding him some rice cereal and hopefully in the next couple of days it makes him sleep better, you think it will work?

Elissa - posted on 01/22/2010

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Try putting a crib or cosleeped beside you. When he wants fed you can easily lift him into bed and he can feed, then go straight back in. Keep doing this until he settles and eventually he will get the idea.



If you still want him in the bed, try feeding him but not responding to his playing - dont turn a light on, dont talk to him or try to soothe him. If he gets no response he might get the message. Struan does this every so often and I just lie there with my eyes closed. He will latch on and off when it suits him but he seems to get the idea that it isn't playtime - most nights!



Try reading the Baby Sleep Book by William and Martha Sears, it has lots of ideas. I dont believe in persevering - if something doesn't work change your approach. ~You wouldn't keep using a failing tactic at work, so why do it with a baby? Eventually you will find something that helps you nboth to get a good nights sleep. Good luck x

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