Lets be realistic!

Melissa - posted on 10/27/2010

Sorry to serial post, but just wanted to share that my dd loathed solids so much as an infant that she'd either always spit them up or would just fall asleep in her chair... and this for a child who loved to nurse to sleep and only ever wanted to sleep with mama. LOL
And if anyone has any question about nursing to 4- feel free to send me a note. :-D

Melissa - posted on 10/27/2010

@ Jade A.R.- your lo's doctor sounds pretty ignorant unless there are extenuating circumstances to the recommendation to wean @12 mos. Even the AAP recommends "at LEAST" 12 mos, and has documented benefits to at least 3 yo... so they aren't following guidelines.

Melissa - posted on 10/27/2010

@Sarah L- absolutely a baby can exclusively bf for a year.. or more. ;-) My healthy 7 yo dd didn't eat more than 1 toddler sized meal by 12 mos, and didn't start regularly eating solids until 2 years.

Daniela - posted on 10/27/2010

Tiffany: I am assuming you havn't read all the posts, otherwise you would have seen loads of posts who said pretty much what you are saying, just without the aggression. I don't remember many insanly rude and disrespectful posts, but you certainly can't blame any nursing mom for explaining why extended breastfeeding is realistic for her seeing that that was the subject of the original post. I do get it - extended breastfeeder, co-sleeper, food choices not always great, gave baby meds to get her to sleep out of desperation, the list goes on. Plenty to criticise me for, but I can argue my corner for all my choices, and for those times where I can't - that's ok too, I made a mistake, mom's human. There really shouldn't be such a divide between moms.

A - posted on 10/27/2010

Tiffany- just speaking from my *personal* experience-
Being what we're calling "defensive" is usually a response to the feeling of guilt, for me anyway. Maybe "defensive" isn't the right word- because I can defend or argue my position without feeling upset or guilty, but I think most people use that word in reference to when people kind of attack back at people- and that, in my experience again, is usually out of guilt and you're more trying to JUSTIFY what you're doing. So when people are making excuses and justifying that way, I'd say theres usually some sort of guilt there.

No one is a perfect mom- we all lack in different areas. But I have to agree when a mom gets "defensive" on a topic theres usually some guilt, and we wouldnt feel guilty if we didnt feel ourselves we were doing something wrong. Just because youre lacking in one area and defensive doesnt mean youre a bad mom in general, just perhaps in that area.

I do a lot of things unconventionally when it comes to parenting. When someone challenges what I've done, I dont feel any guilt or a need to attack them or justify what I do. I do, however, try to inform people or why I do what I do, and usually have facts and research to back it up. My ulterior motive is to inform people and open their minds to other ways of parenting.

Like I said, we all have our faults. When I was a new parent, I let my child cry it out and tried forcing sleep training on him. It was an absolute mistake and I will never do it again, and I feel still guilt about it to this day. I also lose my temper easily and raise my voice sometimes. Does this make me a bad mom? Not overall, but it does make me a bad mom in those areas of parenting. There's room for improvement which I try to work on everyday.

The facts are, if you're not breastfeeding, in most cases (theres always medical problems to consider, extremem circumstances that are sometimes beyond our control) you simply aren't doing whats best in feeding your child.

But some people have absolutely no problem with not breastfeeding their child. How can this be? Because we've all came to different conclusions on to what is right and wrong. Right and wrong are simply our own different points of view. If you think putting your child at increased risk of illness and other health problems is right- that's your opinion to think. But many moms have come to the conclusion the health of our children is most important.

I'm sure some people think its okay and right to smoke around their children. Yet, I hardly ever see anyone defending that position....and many of the moms who are okay with formula feeding would look down on a mom who smokes around their child and puts them at an increased risk of health problems. Sure, there are babies who grew up with smoke, who turned out fine, just like babies who grew up on formula. But what is really right? Are we being selfish in our decisions? Our we lying to ourselves to justify our actions? I guess that's up for each and every mom to analyze.

Tiffany - posted on 10/27/2010

You need to do what is best for you and your child. Don't listen to people on here who bash mothers who don't breastfeed as long as they see fit. Everyone is going to have an opinion on when you should breast feed and how long, and when you should wean, etc. It's all about what YOU are comfortable with. I don't think 3 or 4 year olds should be breastfed IMO...but I don't hold it against a mother who chooses to do so because it is their choice. Just like some of you on here should not make snide comments about mothers who don't breastfeed past a year or who like myself stopped at 3 months. It does not make you a bad Mom if you stop, or give the baby a bottle or have to supplement with formula. What irks me is when everyone on here is so insensitive to say that people who formula feed are basically giving their children cancer and not doing what is best and 'how could I live with myself for giving my child genetically engineered food' blah blah blah. And for those who are saying she shouldn't get defensive if she thinks she is a good Mom...I don't know one Mom who honestly thinks she is the best Mom! I do the best I can, but I constantly am hoping I am doing what's best. I constantly question if I'm making the right choices. THAT is what a good Mom does! Doesn't mean we're all going to always feel like we're doing great! Reading comments from certain other group members who are insanely rude and disrespectful, can be hard to swallow because it makes you feel like you are a bad Mom even if you are not. This community is supposed to be for support, not to bash each other. It would be real nice if everyone could follow that and be supportive of each other no matter their decisions on breastfeeding.

Laura Zoey - posted on 10/27/2010

Oh shandi that makes me laugh! Lol, I'm sorry I mean no disrespect to your opinion, it's just I can't imagine a two year old not calling it by a name yet and since the statement here from the American academy of family physicians says- " If the child is younger than two years, the child is at increased risk of illness if weaned. "

It's quite clear that weaning before age of two is bad for your Childs health! So in all honesty, if you don't want to risk your Childs health you would be breastfeeding at least two years and by then I'd assume most children would have a vocal word to ask for the breast.

My son said boob shortly after his first birthday, before then he pinched my boob, or pulled up my shirt, or sucked on my neck or shoulder to ask! Before that he rooted his mouth towards my body and smacked his lips.

Knowledge should not be punished.

And weaning due to your child learning a word is quite harsh.

Laura Zoey - posted on 10/27/2010

And for my family it's not an option to use babysitters or daycare for our son, it's just not something I could live with. So we lived off of my part time job 6-9am 5 days a week while daddy watched Eric, and then dad had his 30hr a week job around my schedule so I was with eric. Then when I couldn't be away from Eric even that long I found a babysitting job where I take Eric with me to the house 4hrs every weekday and I earn money that way and daddy works same still.

So yes it's. Tight and not much money available for new clothes, movies, eating out, etc. But enough to live on and being with Eric is worth anything to me. So it is realistic to not use daycare, you just have to work it out and not have expensive expectations! Buy used, reuse, and go without the extras. And yes I will homeschool my kids, many many reasons but big one being I couldn't imagine someone else helping me raise my kids and not knowing if they teach them the same as I do.

Laura Zoey - posted on 10/27/2010

Kellymom.com made mention of some healthy babies exclusively breastfed until two years. Meaning nothing except breast milk.

For the bottle issue, I've said a lot here how bottles can cause side effects and carry risks. Yes my son had a few bottles too, no I'm not saying bottles are bad per say. I'm just saying that there's risks to the jaw development with using predominantly bottles because the jaw develops smaller and so has les room for teeth which can cause crooked teeth over bites etc.

But there's risks to letting your grandma hold the baby too, or risks to taking baby to a park etc. Not saying everyone who goes to a park is bad for exposing baby to germs, just that simply speaking, bottles aren't a part in the natural development of a babies jaw.

Eric ate very very little solids until a year old.he wasn't at all interested in spoon feeding and he hated pursed foods. So he was breastfed and thrived. He was 26lbs and 32inches at a year walked at 9 months and had about 20words down by a year.

Breastmilk needs more credit then we give it in most countries. It's an amazing food and really we should trust it a bit more as it is constantly adjusting to your babies needs.

Shandi - posted on 10/27/2010

100% right there with you...and to me if your kid is old enough to give the boob a name its time to stop breastfeeding them in my opinion but to each their own parents are different just like their kids if you got something working for you go ahead and do it!

Vicki - posted on 10/27/2010

I haven't read all the responses but just answering the OP.

Renee no one says you have to feed until 3-5 years. It is however a reality many people choose and there's no need to knock their decisions. I tend to go by the WHO recommendations - exclusive until 6 months, breastfeed until 2 years then as long as the mother and child want to. However if you want to introduce rice cereal a couple of months early it's not likely to do your daughter any harm. Unnecessary, but probably not harmful.

Breastfeeding a 3, 4 or 5 year old is nothing like feeding your 4 month old. There's no need for it to interrupt a mother's working day or hang a boob over the fence at pre-school. Most breastfeeding children of that age feed once or twice a day, before bed or in the morning. I know several working mothers who breastfeed their older toddlers.

I offered my son food from 6 months, but he wasn't really interested until 14 months and still only eats small amounts now at nearly 16 months. He had every opportunity to eat earlier, but wasn't ready or he would have.

Minnie - posted on 10/27/2010

April- I'm sure that children could survive on breastmilk alone well past the age of two.

There are plenty of mothers on the LLLI forums with two year olds who eat nothing but breastmilk.

While it's not 12 months, my second went 10 months with nothing but my milk. It was completely her choice to begin solids and still is her choice whether she eats table foods or solids at two. Some days she eats a lot of adult foods, some days she only nurses.

Celeste - posted on 10/27/2010

I forgot to discuss something on the OP about "never giving bottles". That's not the recommendation. You don't want to give bottles too early because it can cause nipple preference. Of course, that doesn't mean that a baby WILL but it can. Some babies do fine back and forth, while others don't.

I know about giving a bottle too early first hand! One of my twin boys had no problems going back and forth but my other twin developed nipple preference, as in, he refused to latch after being given a bottle. I worked with him for almost 2 months to get him to latch on. I finally did get him to latch on but it was a lot of hard work, and frustration. I really thought he'd never nurse.

Of course, there are many circumstances that mothers need to give a bottle, like working mothers.

And I really have to say a big kudos to all the working mothers who breastfeed!

Kathy - posted on 10/27/2010

April,I've heard that, but I don't know where. It's definitely up to the baby, isn't it?

My girls are all adults now, very healthy, will eat anything and try everything. In fact, they've become foodies!

April - posted on 10/27/2010

@Kathy...i even heard that ideally a child can live exclusively on breast milk until age 2. Did you hear that too? I swear I heard it somewhere.

My son showed NO INTEREST in solids until he was 18 months old. I offered a lot and he would refuse to open his mouth. He just was not interested. He was very happy and healthy and still is. He's 27 pounds and 32 inches tall :)

Kathy - posted on 10/27/2010

Sarah, my first daughter did, in fact, live exclusively on breastmilk until she was about 12 months old - it was her preference: I'd prepared pureed veg etc, frozen into ice-cube trays (thought I was so clever and well-prepared!) But the little devil wouldn't have a bar of it! So breastmilk it was! She developed an interest in solids eventually, and has always been a healthy eater.

As for my second and third daughters, I'd realised by then that they would have solids when they were ready, so I left it to them, just offering bits and pieces from time to time. Schedules of when babies should have solids didn't apply to us! It wasn't a conscious decision on my part, it just happened.

So, exclusive breastfeeding, no formula, no bottles.

Elysia - posted on 10/27/2010

i totall agree with you on everything. ive breast fed both my children and am still breastfeeding my daughter. i weaned my son at 9months as i was 3months pregnant with my daughter. but i started my son on rice cereal mixed with breast milk at 4months, he was hungry and needed it. i will most likely start my daughter around the same age as she is a hungry little hippo as well. she is actually on the 95th percentile for her weight and they are actually based on formula fed babied lol. u cant wait till 1 yr to introduce solids they need to begin at 6months as by this stage their iron stores have depleted and they need to be taking that in from other sources. as for breastfeeding till 5 or more there is no way in hell that i would do that myself. i think that wat age is completly up to the family and the mum but i personally could never do it that long, i look at my little boy who is 19months and dont think i could still be breastfeeding him

Sarah - posted on 10/27/2010

I started my daughter on baby rice when she was 5 months old, there is no way that you could expect your child to live purely on milk for up to a year! I think when people talk about exclusive breastfeeding they mean using just breast milk as opposed to supplimenting with formula. As for bottles etc, go with what works for you and your child.

A - posted on 10/26/2010

You make it sound like being a stay at home mom and nursing on demand isn't realistic. Certainly not everyone can be a SAHM, but lets be realistic here- a lot of moms choose to work. They could cut back on expenses or have a less fancy car or whatever to stay home with their children.



And when children are older (3 or 4, like you say) they usually don't nurse all day long like a newborn does. Sometimes its only once a week. I planned on weaning my child at one year- and then I did a LOT of research and found extended breastfeeding is best, and self weaning is the norm around the world. Which means most babies around the world are still nursing at age two. Sounds completely realistic to me!



I don't think there's anything wrong with feeding a child cereal or baby food before one. However, its proven children still have an open gut until around 6 months, so I wouldn't advise it before then- althought a lot of doctors are behind the times on this and still allow it at 4 months. I know from my experience, by watching my sons cues, he was not ready for solids until he was a year. He's 18 months now and only eats the equvilent of 2 solid meals a day. He's growing fine and meeting milestones early.



Bottom line- I think we should listen to our babies first, put their health and happiness first, and do our homework, instead of doing what is out of convenience. Our society has a lot of misguided concepts of child rearing. I fell victim of them myself.



I'm not saying you, or anyone like you, is a bad parent. Not everyone can do what others can. But please inform yourself. Bottles do cause problems and feeding from the breast is the best option. They aren't ideal because they cause oral problems, especially if they aren't weaned early. And look up child led weaning. Kathy Dettwylers website has a lot of good information, as does kelly mom. I thought it was okay to wean at a year, too before I did my homework. I"m so glad I kept with it. Just don't shut out options just because what other people or society is telling you. :)



read some info on these links. Whatever you decide to do, your decision should be informed.



http://kathydettwyler.org/detwean.html



http://www.kellymom.com/bf/bfextended/eb...





BTW- Preschool isn't required either. In fact. it varies by state law, but where I live in Montana my child doesn't have to be in school at all until age 7. And there's always homeschooling. :)



My husband is currently working 2 jobs so that I can stay home. We're still having a rough time financially and he's told me he would work 3 jobs, or 4 before he wants me to go back to work, and I couldn't agree more. I'd sell my house and live in a trailer like we used to before I put my kid in day care. That's just how strongly I feel about being with our children while they are young and in a crucial development period. When he's weaned and or old enough to be in school (if we don't homeschool) I'll be more than happy to go back to work. But I can't get these important years back and nothing, even money, is more important than time with my child. But that doesn't work for everyone and thats okay too.

Krystal - posted on 10/26/2010

Celeste lol, no. I didn't really read everything until after i posted. Because I saw what you had wrote and immediately agreed with you so i jumped to hurry and reply.

With my first I wanted to let her self-wean and then we offered her milk at 1 and she cut ME off. lol. She didn't want to bother with the breast or BM she's always been on the go. My second I said I will offer the breast until 1 during the day (and longer for morning and nights) but I will offer BM for as long as she wants. lol.

@Mary, my first was ALL about the solids by four months but my second is still uninterested. We do only one food for every five days, and the only reason why I chose to do jar food is because my husband feels very isolated from us and he really wants to contribute to our baby's daily routine. So he feeds her cereal with jar food but she still just doesn't care for it lol. Which is fine with me!!!

We had a lot of constipation, anemia, and calicum problems when cow's milk was introduced to my first daughter's diet, and it crushed me for her to prefer a cow's love more than mine. lol. So I will hold off on that as long as I can.

Rachel - posted on 10/26/2010

the age that we breast feed to very much seems to be impacted by our culture. I personally thought I would BF till 6 months... that was what everyone did right?... well my son refused to eat food... he was 9 months before he actually would eat food, now I know I am not a perfect mother but at 19 months he is still nursing, not all the time... normally just when he wakes up from his nap and in the morning and i am content with that.

http://www.drmomma.org/2009/07/breastfee... I found this truly interesting on the views of another culture on breastfeeding well in to toddlerhood and beyond

Teresa - posted on 10/26/2010

That is true, Celeste. I always knew I wanted to nurse for at least a year though... who wants to spend that kind of money on formula? ;) When my girls were little I thought it was 'wrong' to nurse much past 18 months. I don't know why I felt that way, but I did and they were fully weaned at 15 months.

I knew that I would go at least a year w/ my son, but before he was born I figured things would be like w/ his sisters... who were schedule fed and 'addicted' to the pacifier. He wouldn't take a pacifier (except once in the hospital) and w/ his reflux... no schedule since nursing was the only thing that made him feel better. Now here we are at 2.5 and he is no where NEAR ready to be done.

As for the 'asking for it' comments.. From birth I referred to it as 'milkies', but when my son started talking about it.... he called it 'baboo' (at 15 months) and that's what it's been ever since. :)

Celeste - posted on 10/26/2010

@Krystal, I don't know if you're referring to me about a 4 year old, but I can assure you, I didn't "offer" LOL In fact, I'm actively weaning him right now because 4 is my own personal limit.


When my boys got older, they came up with their own word-"nah nahs". Another thing that they would do is do the sign word for milk.

One thing I want to point out is that many of us didn't go into thinking "I'm going to nurse a 2 year old!" With my first daughter, I went into it thinking I'd nurse her for 6 months or until she got teeth. She got teeth and I continued. Then I said 1. Once we got to one, I didn't seem any different nursing her the day before she was 1. She weaned at 17 months.

My twin boys, I knew I'd nurse past one but I set a limit to 18 months. Then 2. Then 3. One weaned at 3 1/2 and as I mentioned before, I'm actively weaning my other twin boy at 4. I never thought in a million years that I would EVER nurse this long.

My point is that many of you might change your opinion as your baby gets older. It's different when you're nursing continually. It's hard to visualize your babies as toddlers or even preschoolers.

Krystal - posted on 10/26/2010

Celeste I agree. Asking for a nursing session is one of my favorite things I can't wait for my daughter to start doing! I am constantly talking to my daughter about asking for the boob, and we are trying to figure out a word or notion she could make to tell me she wants a feeding. I think that's a milestone that should be rewarded not a sign for them to be weaned.

Mary - posted on 10/26/2010

@ Krystal: Be sure that when you introduce foods, you do so one at a time with a period of at least 3 days in between so if there is a allergic reaction you will know what caused it as per the recommendation of the AAP.

http://www.healthychildren.org/English/a...

Krystal - posted on 10/26/2010

My daughter and I will go until she self-weans. However, most of her breast milk (we will be holding off cow's milk until she is weaned) will come from a cup only during the days sometime after 1 years of age. However, morning and night feedings will probably still consist of her nursing. Offering a 4 year old your breast is a little (odd may not be the word) unusual for my home, but to each her own. My 6 month old has never had a bottle but she is taking a sippy cup now along with cereal and baby food we just started this past week.

Emma - posted on 10/26/2010

Everyone is different and every baby is different I am feeding my second since introducing solid food he has stopped b/feeding in the day regardless of the fact I am there if he wants it. My first baby fed till 16 months and stopped himself he just gradually reduced himself down to a bedtime feed then stopped one night he just fell asleep without it and he didn't look for it again and I didn't offer it. I think you just have to be sensible if they are eating proper solid food and drinking then it is natural for them to feed less I think a lot of people (myself included first time round) find themselves stuck as they offer the boob as a passifier and babies rely on it as a comforter which it is to a certain extent. I think you are being sensible by doing what is best for you and your circumstances no matter how long you breast feed for you have given your child the best start in life by breast feeding at all!!

Celeste - posted on 10/26/2010

Along with Daniela's post, breastmilk *DOES NOT* lose nutritional value after a certain point in time. It will always be good for them as long as they nurse.

And as someone who did choose to nurse past one, I don't understand the "If they can ask for it" sentiment. So what if they can ask for it? I'm not exactly sure why it's wrong to ask for it? Why is breastfeeding the only thing that's "wrong" to ask for it?

Again, if mothers choose not to nurse past one, that's their choice. It's not wrong, but it's not wrong to choose to nurse past 1, 2 or whatever age you (general) feel is "wrong"

Daniela - posted on 10/26/2010

Just because it's come up a few times by now and it's bugging me a little: My daughter ALWAYS knew how to ask for a feed. First there was the rooting and the screaming, then there was the pull the jumper and put the head down my cleavage, then the come up to me and push the jumper up and then eventually, out of despair because mommy was too slow there was B..B..B..BOOOOOOOO!!! Not the right moment to wean I thought, so I scooped her up, laughed and said 'of course you can have some boo.' That was at 13 months by the way.

Jade - posted on 10/26/2010

You have to do what right for you and your child. My daughter's doctor recommenced not going past a year old on breast feeding. Although my daughter only made it to 2 months because of illness's that would not allow her to breastfeed. Also giving your daughter rice cereal is not a bad thing; that is all up to you and no one can tell you otherwise. Your the mommy, and no one else. My daughter is 15 months old now and she eats whenever she wants. Sometimes I can't get her to even eat on some days and she will only drink a bottle and then there are days where she don't even want a bottle and just food. I know that my daughter is a little old to be on a bottle still but because of her illness's she can not go onto a cup yet... I hope that this helps you out a little bit.

Cassie - posted on 10/26/2010

My daughter started on soilds at around 14 weeks, yes i know its early but it was wat she wanted! :-) She is now 6 months still breastfeed and has 2 meals a day! She's a very fussy baby and will only eat toast, my food or organic baby food 7 months + and many people have said "they shouldnt have soilds untill 6 months" well she has been crawling for a month or so now and if she didnt eat soilds she would be attacthed to boob constant! What im trying to say is you are MOM!! and YOU know BEST! Go with your instinct!

Nikki - posted on 10/26/2010

Wow ... ok I did research on this lol. My baby was feeding every hour and I was depressed from sitting on a couch all day and was in pain for 4 months! I weaned at 5-6 months because they say that after about 4-6 months the effects of breastmilk are best the first 4-6 months. I dealt with it for that long and felt like an awful mom for stopping. To me it was also not what it should have been and my depression wasn't good for me or him. I still nurse first thing in the morning and before he goes to bed. So good for you for still going! They say that LONG LONG LONG time ago kids would naturally wean at like 4-7 years old. I think if they can ask for it, it's wrong. To me 5 years is WAY too long. But that's all opinion! I was going to go for a year, but I know people who do it till the kid is 2. YOU'RE NOT A BAD MOTHER! Rice cereal if started before 3 months could be bad. They supposedly say leads to childhood obesity. I started every few days with 1TBS at 4 months. At 7 months he gets 2TBS of cereal and 2TBS of fruit or veggie twice a day. Never think you're a bad mom or let people tell you you are! Not their baby so who cares! Do what is best for you and your baby. I was looked down upon for BF in public (covered up lol) and for formula feeding so it's all other people butting in! Just enjoy your baby and know what you're doing is perfect for them! :)

Mary - posted on 10/26/2010

Laura, I started putting limits on mine 2year old nursling whenever she was 12 months. I was 3 months pregnant. I had insanely sensitive breasts BUT I knew there was NO way I'd stop nursing. She deserved the best and still does. Distraction works well. I would nurse more before solids but not as much for comfort, so instead I'd take her for a walk outside or coloring a color sheet. I wouldn't start limiting until they are older than 12 months though. It can cause malnutrition and early weaning :( You're son should be fine with some distraction, especially if you are like me nursing while pregnant! LOL!

Celeste - posted on 10/26/2010

Laura, I started putting limits on them around 2 or so. They still weren't happy about it but they were fine after a few times

Laura Zoey - posted on 10/26/2010

celeste, at what age could your son understand limits? im guessing older then eric is 1 1/2 cuz if i ask him to wait one second he flips out! lol.
He still nurses as often as a newborn but its only 5 minutes tops if its not right before nap or bed or during bed. those are 15-20 minutes so he falls asleep.
but yes, certainly by preschool age, (3,4 years) a child would be able to simply breastfeed when with mom, and eat food when away from her. many toddlers do this too if mom works and they manage!
you dont need to be stay at home homeschooling mom to breastfeed a natural duration of 3-6 years or so. if you have time to cuddle your child thats time nough to breastfeed!
Jodi, stay confident in your body! I know you know this but remember most women can breastfeed triplets without bottles or formula. honestly i think bottles of bm would just add stress to a mom of twins.
id prefer it all on tap so i dont have to leave the couch for hours! i kind of hope this baby im carrying is twins....just something ive always dreamed of....im not getting ultasound for a month or so but i cant stop thinking about twins!

Celeste - posted on 10/26/2010

I forgot the preschool question. As they get older, they don't usually nurse like newborns. My twin boys just recently weaned (3 1/2 and 4) and they'd nurse once or twice a day. I think that's a big misconception about nursing a toddler/preschooler. They don't usually nurse like a newborn (though, one of mine would but I started putting limits on him) and they eat a variety of foods and drink from a cup.

Of course, it's ok to have your own personal limit and you may not want to go that long but just wanted you to get the real picture of what nursing a toddler/preschool is like.

April - posted on 10/26/2010

It doesn't sound like you're really giving your daughter that much cereal, so I wouldn't worry about it. It is generally recommended to wait until your child is at least 6 months old before offering solids, but some babies are ready before that. If your child can sit up by herself and is able to pick up food with her fingers...she's ready. That's generally the rule of thumb.

Ok....about the nursing past a year question. Yes it is realistic to nurse and send your child to preschool. You just nurse whenever you're together, for however many times you mutually desire. If I went back to work (at a daycare), I would nurse my son first thing in the morning. After daycare. Bedtime and during the night when he wants. That's realistic for ME. I don't know if that's realistic for YOU though. Only you can decide what is realistic for you.

Do they NEED breast milk after 1 year? Yes they do! The antibodies/immunities they get from breastmilk INCREASE after 1 year. The reason is because many toddlers nurse less than they used to and the less they nurse...the MORE immunity they seem to get!

Celeste - posted on 10/26/2010

PM"ing you Jodi :)

Jodi - posted on 10/26/2010

Awwww, thanks guys! My in-laws (non-breastfeeding family) have been giving me a lot of crap about how I'll "have" to use bottles and pump allllll day to get enough milk for them and I should use formula, or at least supplement. I always leave formula as an absolute last resort...but still an option if necessary, I'm willing to pump milk and use bottles...again if I feel it's necessary for my own sanity! Nothing is off limits for me, everything is an option, but breastfeeding comes first and the others are really only under dire circumstances...my in-laws just cannot understand that part, which is fine...as long as they keep their mouths shut!!! (Which they don't! lol)
Thanks anyways for the encouragement on breastfeeding twins...it's really nice to hear that other women did...and I can do it too!

Laura Zoey - posted on 10/26/2010

Jessie, I have an awesome response for anyone who tries to say the whole "once they have teeth they need to wean" crap. Just tell them that 'baby teeth' are commonly called 'milk teeth' in other species so in reality our kids should be drinking milk until the milk teeth fall out and they have adult teeth.

So that's one of the biological reasons the weaning age is set around 5-6 years as that's when the milk teeth fall out! I mean they should just think Bout it, how is a baby supposed to eat a nutritious diet with two teeth! Or even eight? At minimum they need the full twenty set with the molars before they are biologically equipped to eat as an adult. And without milk. So yeah, when they get adult teeth then they should wean. Not when they get milk teeth!!!

Goodluck with that grandma! Sounds like you are doing just fine with her already. :)

Myetta - posted on 10/26/2010

I agree....do what works best for YOU. I personally nurse my baby when we're together...I don't get much pumping but what I do get *5-7 ounces*I send to daycare the next day. She's on solids now and has been since 5 months because even after the formula and breastmilk, she'd still be really fussy, and the food as calmed down. I plan on nursing until she self weans, and will continue to send whatever milk I pump to daycare with her until nothing else comes out.

Celeste - posted on 10/26/2010

Jodi, who knows, you may not need bottles! My twin boys had a few bottles in the beginning, but after that? No bottles! Though I didn't already have a nursling (my daughter weaned a few years earlier).

Teresa - posted on 10/25/2010

My twins together had maybe a dozen bottles total in their lifetime. I attempted to give my son a bottle once when he was 2 months old. He looked at me like I was crazy and started screaming. lol! That was the only attempt at using a bottle for him. :)

Kathy - posted on 10/25/2010

Thanks Jodi - that was encouraging! But I hope I didn't come across as "showing off", I was just saying it's possible, and not at all uncommon to manage without bottles.
My daughter was still giving her (then) 2-yr-old daughter the occasional breastfeed when her twins were born. She decided the boobies were for her sisters now!
Incidentally, here's some information from the Australian Breastfeeding about babies with teeth:
http://www.breastfeeding.asn.au/bfinfo/b...

But I reiterate - I'm definitely pro-breastfeeding, but it's a personal choice. Mums rule!

Jodi - posted on 10/25/2010

Kathy, what an inspiration! I am 5 months pregnant with twins and still nursing my 20 month old daughter, I coudln't imagine it any other way! I do plan on nursing my twins until they self wean as well. My daughter, at 20 months, has never had a bottle either. Although, I may concede and buy a couple of bottles for the twins as I'm sure it will be more difficult to nurse two babies and a toddler! But, I'm holding off until I feel they need a bottle, or actually, I feel the need for them to have a bottle! I'm so glad there are women like you out there (4= years!!!) for me to look up to and give me thehope that I too can do it despite the public eye!

Jessie - posted on 10/25/2010

I particularly like the "when the get teeth they are too old to nurse" bull shit. some babies ARE BORN WITH TEETH! yeah, doesn't happen a ton, but IT DOES HAPPEN. so based off that reasoning those babies should not be fed and die right? I think not. And it's ubsurd to jump to the idea that you just switch them to formula when you think it's 'gross' to nurse or 'wrong' what exactly would you have done a hundred years or so? let your baby starve to death? I think not. By the way, my own mother is one of those 'teeth is too old' people. She started sticking her nasty fingers in my sons mouth at about 3 months old, confidant that he was going to pop out a tooth and I would 'stop giving him a booby every time he cried' .... he was 11 months old when he got the first one and I didnt even know he had it. She found it with her finger while I was outside... she was very excited. I think she was sure she would be right and I would stop. 6 months later he has 8 teeth and nurse 2-3 times a day. After his birthday she began to ask daily if he was still booby feeding. Just today he asked if we quit yet because we recently found out he is dairy and wheat intolerant. hell no I didnt quit. I changed my OWN diet as well as my sons and she just cant understand why I would stop eat dairy and most wheat just to nurse him. I would do ANYTHING to give my son the best at any expense. He comes first

Kathy - posted on 10/25/2010

Oops, I mean good. Goddesses, maybe!

Kathy - posted on 10/25/2010

I agree, Leslie, but I must take issue with your belief that it would be impossible to never give a bottle: I fed my girls for 2 yrs, 21/2 yrs and 4+ years. I didn't even buy a bottle. Buy the time they were about 12 months' old they were well and truly using cups for all their other liquids.
But as you say - we're ALL god mums.

Leslie - posted on 10/25/2010

YOU ARE NOT A BDA MOTHER!!! SO FAR FROM IT.
I gave my son rice cereal at 4mths, and started him on cream of wheat at 5 mths. He's been eating veggies/ fruit since he was 5mth too. I now still make all his food. He's 9mth old. I still breast fed, however when I go to work (Part time evenings) my husband gives him formula, cause I just don't have the time to pump a bottle or two every day.... Some people say I do things wrong, however I do what works for us as you do what works for you. No mother is a bad mother, and no mother is better than another mother. It is the norm to breatfeed now until 6-9 mths, and maybe a year. I only know one person who BF until her son was two... To be honest I think that is too long. I also have a 21 mth old son and I couldn't picture myself still bfeeding a child of that age. But hey if that is what you want to do... then go for it. I think in this world it would be impossible to never give a bottle... Not unless you want to glue your child to you for the first year.
I say do what works best for you and your baby/child. And don't ever let anothers opinion make you feel like a bad mom.

Celeste - posted on 10/25/2010

Putting on my mod hat for a minute!

With what Jodi and Lisa mentioned, I want to reiterate that community guidelines do not allow unsupportive comments, insults, etc. It's fine to have your own opinion but it is not ok to call names.

Proceed :)