No more breastfeeding but now screaming....Help!

Tiffany - posted on 03/25/2011

As others have said, it can be temper tantrums as toddlers start testing the boundaries and limits. My daughter, 16 mos, has been doing that for the past month or so. Usually when she doesn't get her way or is upset about something, she yells about it. And this happens more often when she's tired or hungry.

She may have had a virus, like you said, or it could have been something that you ate or any meds that you took that might have upset her stomach. Even if she's not asking for milk, you can offer her the chance to nurse. You can also pump your milk and offer it to her that way. We started my daughter on some whole milk after her 1st birthday, but she wouldn't drink it straight. We had to mix breastmilk and whole milk until she got used to it. Now, she'll drink whole milk on her own (w/out having it mixed w/ breastmilk). Also, she still has to have it warmed up and won't often drink it cold. I also agree w/ the other writer that if she's been nursed to sleep, she may not know how to fall asleep on her own. Sometimes we have this problem with my daughter.

If it continues, definitely take her to her ped to get checked out. There have been times where I took my daughter to the dr to find out she had an ear infection and other times, I've taken her, were false alarms. Also, she could be teething. My daughter was miserable for about a week working on her molars.

Good luck!

Aicha - posted on 03/21/2011

the random screaming is normal she found her loud voice . How are you giving her the milk? in a cup or a bottle some children are very picky about how they drink their milk my daughter will only drink her milk if we warm it up first she is 18 months old and also still breastfeeding

Diane - posted on 03/21/2011

Maybe she was just on a nursing strike and not actually ready to wean? You could try nursing again to see if it helps her.

Amber - posted on 03/20/2011

I agree about the earache possibility. A lot of babies don't pull on their ears when they have an earache, but crying when she goes to bed is very typical of one. Often that is when it hurts the most. Also, it can be painful to suck when they have an earache, though it can also be soothing. You can try giving her tylenol if you don't want to take her in. If it helps the screaming, then you may have an idea about whether or not she was in pain. Over 3/4 of ear infections resolve themselves, so if she is getting better, you may not need to take her in and put her on harsh antibiotics. Warm olive oil can be very soothing to the ear drum, and they sell ear pain relief drops in health food stores. Look for the ones with garlic, mullein, and tea tree (as these fight infections), these always make my daughter feel better. Also, my daughter never liked cow's milk after she weaned, but she loves goat's milk. It is a healthy dairy option. Soy milk has a lot of hormones in it that are not the healthiest for developing babies. Almond and rice milk are also good options.

Jennifer - posted on 03/20/2011

I can't imagine a kid just randomly throwing a tantrum. If they are trying to get something, they make it very clear what they want. If it continues, I think she should see the doctor. Perhaps there is the earache or indigestion...little kids are not good at pinpointing where the pain is coming from and telling others about it. They don't always display the typical symptoms, either. Good luck- and my grandpa always said,"You can't spoil a good kid, and the bad ones are already spoilt."

Adelina - posted on 03/20/2011

You could try giving her different types of milk, some babies don't respond well to cows milk, so you could try almond or rice milk. Good luck, that is so hard when they are screaming!!

Ruth - posted on 03/20/2011

Lots of Moms don't realize that whatever they eat, for instance garlic or beans, that will cause them gas or bad taste to Mom's milk could be why baby stops nursing at the breast. Plus formula with iron always caused mine to have severe constipation. Take your little one to her pediatrician. She may need to be placed on soy or may be lactose intolerant. Get it checked out.

Heather - posted on 03/19/2011

Take her to the ped. sounds like she might have an earache maybe? Also, she might have been nursing herself to sleep, so now, she doesn't know how to fall asleep, without nursing.

Lori - posted on 03/18/2011

I agree with Jody on little ones learning new ways to make mommy and daddy "dance". It can be so hard to remain calm when your LO is crying, but it does help.

Remember that while you can't spoil a baby, you can however spoil a toddler. That being said it doesn't mean that your toddler doesn't need lots of love/hugs/kisses and play with you. Just that she also needs to learn that there are boundaries. Kids are happiest when there are boundaries, and then know what those boundaries are. Course the only way they know what/where those are is by testing them.

Jody - posted on 03/18/2011

As she get older she is going to explore new ways of getting attention or getting her way. It's very hard not to respond immediately when your child screams, but if she appears to be fine and not sick then she i sprobably testing new waters. You'll have to be careful, let her know you will be there but don't over react or give in to the demands or it might lead to tantrums later, our children learn quickly how to make mommy and daddy dance :) Try to stay mildly concerned but calm in your responses because responding to strongly either way often feeds into attention seeking behaviours :)

good luck!!

Angel - posted on 03/17/2011

well actually she got on my lap and fed for a bit. i think it calmed her down a little. I think I spoiled her to much. Shes my first and it took awhile to have her so I guess I am just making sure she is happy.

Lori - posted on 03/17/2011

OK - doesn't sound like it's due to illness then. And I agree you can't force her to drink it. You can offer instead of wait for her to ask, but of course if she doesn't want to, then no don't force it.

So lets see, screaming while going to bed and randomly throughout the day. Sounds like shes not getting her way and has found a new way of protesting. Are the times during the day related to her either wanting something or not wanting to do something? I think it's pretty normal for toddlers to throw tantrums at least a few times to see what reaction they're going to get, and or because they don't know how else to deal with the emotions they're having (not getting what they want, etc.) I've found that walking away from the tantrum usually ends it pretty quickly. My daughter is almost 3 now and we still have our moments of her "loosing it", but at least now she can tell me why she's upset or what she wanted. At 15 months your LO doesn't have the vocabulary to do that yet.

How did things go with her today?

Angel - posted on 03/17/2011

Its only been about 2 or 3 days since she has had any. She just randomly throws fits. I am not keeping from it from her but if she doesn't come up to me to breastfeed as usual then i can't force her to drink it. Normally she just has to have it to sleep. She doesn't pull on her ears. She has a fever last week but she don't anymore.

Lori - posted on 03/17/2011

Maybe it was a nursing strike rather than self weaning???? Is the screaming like she's in pain or more behavioral like a tantrum? If she was throwing up maybe she is still sick. Things like earaches can make it painful for her to nurse, but if she's sick she needs your milk more than anything else.

How long has she been weaned? How long has she been screaming when going to bed?

Angel - posted on 03/17/2011

well she was sick with a stomache virus or something cause everytime I fed her she threw it all up. Since then she hasn't tried anymore breastmilk. She hasn't even wanted any.

Cynthia - posted on 03/17/2011

Have u tried nursing her again?? Maybe she needs some kind of soothing 2 replace not nursing anymore..my babygirl is 16 mo and shes not near being ready..my other babygirl now 7..I nursed her til 4 yrs old..she needed that soothing bond..n my babyboy now 16 stopped himself at almost a year old..all babies are different..but they all need some kind of soothing..good luck..God Bless..