suggestions on getting 6 month old BF baby sleeping thru night

Tess - posted on 03/31/2011

I've heard a lot of you mention co-sleeping, but I'll be honest - I HATE having the baby in bed with me and hubby. I do it because he still wakes up 2-3 times a night, but I put him back in his bed - which is about four feet away from me and facing the same way so as soon as he looks up he sees me. I have always been a cuddly sleeper with my hubby and our 1 year old is more of a move-y, put-my-feet-all-over-you kind of sleeper. I am getting hardly any sleep. I am a SAHM, but hubby works very hard and has to be out of bed at 5 am. I used to be a 9 hour a night girl before I got pregnant - I didn't sleep well pregnant cause I am a belly sleeper. Now I am lucky to get three hours in a row. I'm 37 - I need sleep. However, I LOVE my son and can't do the cry it out thing. He is my whole world and I know it will pass, but I still think him being in his own bed most of the night is best for my marriage...and daddy came first and I LOVE him too! I wish I could nap during the day...everytime I do I wake up with a headache. IDK why. I know I will sleep again someday and hubby is great about letting me sleep in some after am nursing on weekends, but I do spend a lot of days in a sleep deprived daze. AND then on the news this morning they had the audacity to say that you are much less likely to lose weight if you aren't getting enough sleep! Oh well - I guess I'll just be a chubby, sleepy GREAT mommy!

Tess - posted on 03/31/2011

I've heard a lot of you mention co-sleeping, but I'll be honest - I HATE having the baby in bed with me and hubby. I do it because he still wakes up 2-3 times a night, but I put him back in his bed - which is about four feet away from me and facing the same way so as soon as he looks up he sees me. I have always been a cuddly sleeper with my hubby and our 1 year old is more of a move-y, put-my-feet-all-over-you kind of sleeper. I am getting hardly any sleep. I am a SAHM, but hubby works very hard and has to be out of bed at 5 am. I used to be a 9 hour a night girl before I got pregnant - I didn't sleep well pregnant cause I am a belly sleeper. Now I am lucky to get three hours in a row. I'm 37 - I need sleep. However, I LOVE my son and can't do the cry it out thing. He is my whole world and I know it will pass, but I still think him being in his own bed most of the night is best for my marriage...and daddy came first and I LOVE him too! I wish I could nap during the day...everytime I do I wake up with a headache. IDK why. I know I will sleep again someday and hubby is great about letting me sleep in some after am nursing on weekends, but I do spend a lot of days in a sleep deprived daze. AND then on the news this morning they had the audacity to say that you are much less likely to lose weight if you aren't getting enough sleep! Oh well - I guess I'll just be a chubby, sleepy GREAT mommy!

Vanessa - posted on 03/29/2011

i exclusively breastfeed my 4 1/2 month old and i started feeding at bed time, out of bed about 2 months ago and he started sleeping 8 hrs thru the night, im not saying every night is perfect but i believe in self soothing, but not letting him cry it out, he sometimes whines a little but goes to sleep, if its deterring your performance during the day, whether you're at work or home, i still think you need to make sure that you're feeling your best and get back in bed with hubby, because a happy loving close marriage makes the same for your family

Leslie - posted on 03/29/2011

Not even I, as an adult, sleep 8-9 hours straight. Just sleep when he sleeps. Put him to the breast while you both lie down and sleep. Seriously, why expect a baby to sleep 8-9 hours when you can't sleep like that every night?

Karen - posted on 03/29/2011

4-5 hours is great...my 10 month old is lucky to go 2-3 hours...my 2 and a half year old was the same up until 19 months. Just grin and bear it...they'll be grown before you know it enjoy the beautiful night-time connection with your baby.

Sarah - posted on 03/28/2011

It is exhausting to be breastfeeding an infant under the age of 1. I've always heard that for our nruslings, 5 hours IS sleeping through the night. The difference between formula feeding and breastfeeding babies in sleeping is that formula is actually HARD to digest - it sits around in the stomach and gut longer; and FF babies tend to be getting fed A LOT more than a breastfed baby - 8oz or more at once. A breastfed baby isn't going to necessarily take 8 oz at once from the breast, and what the baby does take is going to empty from the stomach much faster than formula because breastmilk is the optimal food for the baby.

My Dd breastfed to 37 months. She did sleep 1 great stretch at night from about 9-3 from 3 months to 6 months, but from 6 months to 15 months we were up every 1.5 -2.5 hrs at night. It was definately a challenge, but I was committed to letting her set the schedule for the first year. We nightweaned at 15 months and I really think we were both ready for it. She's 3.5 now and #2 will be here in a few short weeks. I'm not sure I'm ready for that sort of sleep deprivation again, but at this point, it's a little too late to get off the train. . .

Stephanie - posted on 03/28/2011

ladies, I get it. Really, I do. I chose to exclusively breastfeed both my babies because I know it is best, and I want that special bond with them. I co-slept with my 28 month old, who is currently in bed with daddy, while the 6 month old and myself are upstairs. I'm trying desperately to get the 6 month old to sleep in his crib, because none of us would get sleep if we were all four in the bed together. I put the baby down in his crib at 9:30, he wakes around 12, I pat he goes back to sleep. Then he wakes between 2 and 3, I nurse him (in bed with me). I put him back in his crib around 330-430 (depending on whether i fell asleep or not), but he wakes every time after about 30 mins. At this point he has just eaten, I know he wants to be in bed with mommy, I understand this. At this point, should I just let him fuss a few minutes?? I'd really like to get back in bed with my husband without both kids. :) maybe I should eliminate the 3 am feeding in bed with me, so he doesn't know what he's missing?

Kathy - posted on 03/27/2011

Babies sleep though when they're ready, and it generally has very little to do with whether they're breastfed or not.

Cathy - posted on 03/27/2011

My experience says that some babies sleep, and some don't. I have given many mothers advice without any change in the baby's sleep habit. Actually 4-5 hours is much better than some 6 month olds. I say relax, enjoy this time and go to bed early!!!

Robin - posted on 03/27/2011

Surprisingly 4-5 hours is considered "through the night" so count yourself lucky! Plus as soon as you can get him to sleep longer, something will happen (teething, sick, developmental milestone) and he will might have a "backslide" and need/want to nurse more. GL and remember to enjoy this time with him, someday we won't say two words to you in a row :)

Diane - posted on 03/27/2011

It's normal for a baby to pacify at the breast, remember the pacifer was invented as a breast substitute (not the other way around) many babies are just not ready to sleep through the night this young but if you're very tired you could try co-sleeping and then baby can nurse at will while you sleep and cuddle up.

Rachel - posted on 03/27/2011

It's always interesting to see people write about the breast being used as a baby's pacifier, when the pacifier was made to replace the breast when a baby wasn't able to nurse right then. :-) Anyway... with my little one, she doesn't sleep through the night either. I have her in bed with me though, and we wake up a few times so she can nurse, then we just go right back to sleep. The important thing here is that each baby is different and has different needs. Be available for those needs. That's part of being a parent. Love your baby, attend to his needs and he will repay you with being more alert to your needs.
Studies Kathleen Kendall-Tackett has done have shown that breastfeeding mothers get more sleep and better sleep, even when waking up in the night. Generally, babies need to not sleep 8-9 hours in a row for quite some time (again, each baby is different). Just be in tune to what he needs and it will work out just fine.

Vanessa - posted on 03/27/2011

at the bedtime feeding I now stay out on the couch, instead of nursing him to sleep in our bed and when he is done, he goes right into the cradle, which is in our room, i think if your baby is waking up at 3am he just wants to use you as a nuk to fall back to sleep, not that he's really hungry, so if he does wake up see if he will self soothe back to sleep and if he doesn't have daddy take him and hold him still in the dark til he relaxes and falls back to sleep, if you grab him he'll want to nurse and be even more alert, my son sleeps about 8hrs thru the night now after doing this, if he's at grandmas, he sleeps even longer, of course they want you and you want to comfort them all the time, but you need to be rested up to be the best mommy you can be:)

Erin - posted on 03/27/2011

http://themominformed.blogspot.com/2011/...

Sally - posted on 03/27/2011

The AAP defines "sleeping through the night" as midnight to 5 am and very few babies are physically capable of it when the parenting books tell you they are. As exhasting as it may be, you have a perfectly normal baby.
Almost all of the sleep training methods involve teaching your baby that you are not going to respond to their needs at night. While western culture tries to pretend otherwise, babies NEED to be in close pysical contact with mom most of the time.
Have you considered co-sleeping? The standard western bed can be a smothering hazard, but that is very easy to correct. When used to facilitate brestfeeding, sleeping with your baby can lower your SIDS risk a lot. If your baby is in your bed, you don't have to wake up for the entire nursing section or leave your nice cozy bed when they cry. You just roll over so they can latch on and go back to sleep while they nurse. With practice you may notice their feed cues in your sleep well before they start crying which will be more restful and less stressful for both of you. When they get bigger, they'll do all the work of getting to the nipple by themselves and you don't have to wake at all.
Good luck

Aleks - posted on 03/26/2011

4-5hour stretch for a 6 months old is normal and actually pretty GREAT!!! You should be happy about that. IT IS NOT A BAD HABBIT. Sorry, but I really dislike when people call baby behaviour/s as habbits. Babies don't know habbits, they only know instinct and they go by it. Bad habbits are smoking, drinking to excess, biting ones nails, etc etc. Baby waking and needing a feed or comfort at night is not a bad habbit, it is a "need".



Like someone else said above me, babies will sleep thru the night when they are developmentally ready. At 6mths old, most babies are definitively not ready. True, some babies sleep through the night at 8weeks, but these are rare, and I bet that they are not consitsant, meaning, that there comes a time when they too start waking again.



Having a couple of feeds at night isn't exactly being used as a pacifier, just ask the women who cannot even detach their baby from their breast otherwise baby wakes and screams to be put back on - all night. LOL And besides, a pacifier is nothing but a (very poor) substitute for mother's breast :-)



Please know that what your baby is doing is perfactly normal and "healthy". People expecting babies to sleep like adults do only cause themselves stress (and stress on baby) when this does not happen (trust me I know as I have been there - I too, as first time mum, believed the myths of babies sleeping thru the night and felt stressed, frustrated and angry when this did not eventuate). As soon as one "accepts" that a baby may not sleep thru the night until they are ready (and this may be at 8weeks, 8mths or 18mths or even 2.8yrs) the easier and calmer night time parenting is, and easier coping with sleep deprivation gets. I don't know how that works, but it definitively can, just by simply accepting that that is normal and ok. Yes, parenting is a 24hr job for a lot longer than a few weeks - and, no, not many people warn you about that, huh? LOL.

Jackie - posted on 03/26/2011

My daughter is 6 months too and the same - the longest she sleeps is 5 hrs. Which at this age technically is sleeping through the night. The reason formula-fed babies sleep longer is because their bodies don't digest the formula well and it takes longer to digest. At this age, it is a good thing for babies to still be waking up after 5 hrs of sleep - protects against SIDS, gives them the nutrition and comfort they still need at night, etc. I'm a first-time mom, yet I know this will pass as she gets older.

Jody - posted on 03/26/2011

My 20 month ole still wakes up at least once a night for around 40 minutes to an hour (sometimes two hours). It's exhausting but she is a happy and confident girl so I reckon that as long a I can stay sane, we'll keep it up until she's ready to sleep through.

Liha - posted on 03/26/2011

I breastfed my daughter until she was 25 mos. old... she never slept through the night until we stopped BF'ing completey. My son is almost 1 year and he is still up every 2 - 3 hours at night.... we tried EVERYthing you can think of. With both kids we even tried cry it out. It worked for three or four nights and then they slowly, slowly started waking again.... I don't want to do the cry it out again only to have to repeat it... so, I'm up a lot at night. Good luck!

Jo - posted on 03/26/2011

there's a routine of a dream feed at 10ish and then again during the night; the 2-4 am one is then in theory the one they drop and start going from 10 through till morning. I wish I'd understood that... we did bedtime feed then the 2-4 am sleep until he naturally dropped that one by himself at 10.5 months. how did I know he was ready? When he woke, give a little cuddle first rather than go straight to cuddle. that's when I realised he was ready, cos he went straight back to sleep without the feed!!

Kristi - posted on 03/26/2011

My 10 1/2 month old was/is the exact same *sigh*. We start him out in the crib each night, but by the 2 or 3 time he wakes I'm too tired and I give in and bring him to bed with us. He will sleep 2 - 3 hour stretches and wakes up to nurse. It is exhausting. What keeps me going is that I know it won't last forever. And just think, by the time our kids are teens we will be fighting the opposite battle in trying to WAKE them up! LOL

Ania - posted on 03/26/2011

you should be happy that your baby slept 5 hours straight. My child was waking up every 2 hours until he was 12 mot=nths and I was trying EVERYTHING. and then at 12 months he started sleeping. Well I feel that my determination to just putting him in his crib and patting his back helped but he was just waking up. Some babies are not ready to sleep thru the night at that age, no matter what books say. It is more common than you think

Layla - posted on 03/26/2011

BTW co-sleeping worked wonders for my family. I never felt unrested because we just nursed in bed without anyone becoming fully awake at night.

Layla - posted on 03/26/2011

He is sleeping appropriately for a six month old. 4-5 hour stretch is normal. Don't put pressure on yourself or him to get him to sleep longer. Two books to help: The No Cry Sleep Solution (Elizabeth Panly?) and Nightime Parenting (Dr. Sears)

Holly - posted on 03/26/2011

My 3 year old, 7 year old, 9 year old, 11 year old and 14 year old (as well as the 16 month old) do not sleep through the night.. neither do I.. so at six months it might just not happen :) Comfort nursing is pretty common and is healthier than a paci (and better for mom and her milk supply).. Luckily I co-sleep so for MANY months Aiden has been self serving and not waking me up when he needed to nurse in the night.. he cuddles up, latches on and goes RIGHT back to sleep :) Of course my three year old goes potty and comes into our bed when he wakes up and the older four just go get a drink, snack, go potty and put themselves back to bed at their age.. Like Heaven said, some babies aren't developmentally ready until later.. I wake up out of thirst.. sometimes out of hunger depending on how early we ate supper.. These days will pass and you will miss them! Eventually.. lol... try to enjoy them :) When I get woke up by my older kids moving around the house I get up with them and we spend some time chatting about *stuff* or just cuddling together for a short time :) It's awesome one on one time that can't be reproduced.. :) When I *do* wake up with my baby we get some cuddle time and that is when he is usually most lovable, huggable, cuddly and gives the most kisses :)

Katy - posted on 03/26/2011

My soon was eleven months when he slept thro. He was ebf, and my health visitor advised not to expect a baby under 6months to sleep through as it just wasn't realistic. Mums instinct is normally right I think so if you think one wake up is just for comfort, work on eliminating that one rather than the genuine hunger one. Babies always get hooked on something to help them sleep, for us it was either bouncing on a yoga ball or nursing. You just have to wean them off their dependence e.g less bouncing or not letting them nurse to sleep. Gradual is better than cold turkey with all dependencies. You could try working on nap times first if it is less stressful. Just do it bit at a time so as not to be too harsh for bub.

Lauren - posted on 03/26/2011

No Cry Sleep Solution has wonderful suggestions for gently encouraging better nighttime sleep, but it's common for children to wake at night for quite awhile. My 14 mo old still wakes once or twice a night, and my oldest didn't sleep through the night until she was 28 months old. No tricks have changed that. I try not to think of myself as being "used" but as being the main source of comfort and nourishment my children seek in the night. It's normal so I try to bear it as best I can, and take naps when I can, too :).

Stephanie - posted on 03/26/2011

I have a two yr old who did this until about 11 months. I really don't want to do this again for another 5 months. The dream feed sounds interesting. I do believe at 3 or 4 in the morning he is waking out of hunger. Its the 5 or 6 o 'clock that I believe is just for comfort. Neither of my boys took or will take a paci. I didn't give my oldest one until he was 4 weeks old, and he wanted NO part of it. I went ahead and gave my youngest one after we came home from hospital. He took it for a couple months, but once he realized mommy is better, he too, will have nothing to do with one now. He is doing just like big brother.......using mommy.
In response to Heaven, I guess all my friends who are mommies that don't breastfeed have babies who are developing faster than either of mine. They have younger babies who have been sleeping 10-12 hours at night since they were a couple months old.
I breastfed my oldest for a year, and probably will this one too, but it is just exhausting sometimes.

Danielle - posted on 03/26/2011

My son is 18 months and does the same thing. He's never slept more than 3 hours on his own. Ever. It's exhausting, but I'm hoping won't last much longer.

Carolyn - posted on 03/21/2011

one word ! Dreamfeed !

lets say he goes to bed at 8, when you head off to bed latch him, he will nurse while outcold. It will refill his tummy and keep him going. at about 7-8 months you can eliminate the dreamfeed by increasing his food intake during the day to account for that feeding he is no longer getting at night.

Its freaking great. I started doing it @ 8 weeks and baby started sleeping through the night.

your also coming up on a growth spurt, so be prepared for sleep disturbances and a feeding frenzy.

Are you open to a pacifier ? because if he is not actually feeding when he wakes up ( google videos on on comfort suckling vs milk transfer and how to tell the difference) a pacifier might do the trick if he is not actually feeding.

there are a billion different ways to help your child learn to self sooth without making them cry it out. I used the Pick Up Put Down method and it worked great for us. Pick up when baby cries, put back down the moment baby is calm. Pick up , put down , just make sure to put baby all the way down ( even if he starts crying on the way there) and then pick up a gain. Avoid rocking bouncing patting in the pick up part. Look it up for more details and how to do it if it sounds interesting,

5 hours is technically sleeping through the night though at that age.

If he is waking out of hunger, the dreamfeed will help.

Heaven - posted on 03/21/2011

kids will sleep through the night when they are developmentally ready to. I don't think much else helps. Many of the "tricks" of getting them to sleep through the night before they are ready to are things like cry it out. In my opinion this does nothing other than teach your child that you won't respond to their cries for help. Human babies are very co-dependent and NEED us for quite a long time, they can't fend for themselves. So usually they don't sleep through the night until they are developmentally and emotionally capable. What helped me a lot was a change of mindset on my part. This stage only lasts for a short while. So I would remind myself of that when at whits end.

Heather - posted on 03/21/2011

wish i could help you there. it took us almost 12 months to get our babe to sleep 5 hours through. 8-9 would be a dream. lol.