where would you not bf your baby?

Christina - posted on 10/17/2010

I just feel uncomfortable breast feeding in public and will usually try to find a private room to bf my little girl if I don't have any more pumped milk for her with me. Though sometimes she gets hungry and I just can't feed her because of where I am like on a bus. I would like to be able to just cover up and feed her in those cases but I wear a lot of t-shirts which I normally just pull up and over my head to let her at my breast since I can't really pull the neck down. Any advice on how to feed her in public while wearing a t-shirt for a new mom without a budget that can afford a nursing cover?

Kassie - posted on 09/25/2010

I wouldn't around male relatives and friends, just because it made THEM uncomfortable, but my son wouldn't really tolerate the cover blanket (it's hot under there!) so I just did it in front of strangers and didn't care. I'll never see them again, so what's the harm. I did give a very large tip to the waiter who had to take my order with my son latched onto my breast because he looked VERY uncomfortable, but didn't say anything to me! I am pretty well endowed, so there just wasn't any being discreet when I had to feed my son, but I remembered why I was doing it, and how much better it was for my son, and just sucked it up.

Melissa - posted on 09/24/2010

I want to say that I have absolutely NO problems with women breastfeeding anywhere the baby needs to eat as long as they are discrete. That said, I was never comfortable nursing in front of anyone (other than my husband, my mom and my sister). Part of this was because my son had problems nursing so I always had to use a nipple shield (makes it harder to be discreet) but partly because it was just out of my comfort zone.

Tracy - posted on 09/24/2010

I have nursed everywhere, except for bathrooms! I think that's gross. I also never used a cover, just am really discrete with my shirts (wear tanks underneath). I suppose there are some people I might not breastfeed in front of, but not many. A screaming baby draws a lot more attention.

Jayde - posted on 09/24/2010

personally i think breastfeed anywhere you need to but with modesty & stuff what people think, babies need to eat. BUT, i dont like the let-it-all-hang-out look, i have breastfed my girl for nearly a year & half and i get really uncomfortable around women who get there whole boob & dont try to be modest -seriously that's the reason why people get antsy about it in the first place

Melanie - posted on 09/23/2010

Can I just ask why so many people are bothered with nursing at church? I've seen alot of posts with this being the place they won't nurse. Jesus was nursed, so why can't you nurse your baby there?

Kellie - posted on 09/23/2010

I bf where ever we were. If I felt uncomfortable I would use a blinket, to keep everything covered up.

Hillary - posted on 09/23/2010

This is a tough one! I breast fed my babies just about everywhere--even on a bench out on the street. I did it in front of relatives, friends, at stores, at the mall, in parks, in museums, etc. After a while I stopped feeling uncomfortable and learned how to be very discrete even without a cover. And I thought, why should I hide? My baby wants to eat and I don't want to miss what's going on. Why should I have to? Moms of bottle fed babies don't run and hide. And, besides, I felt that in some way I was helping the breast feeding movement out by not hiding! Breast feeding is normal and natural. It is not sexual. It's just the ideal way to feed babies.

Francine - posted on 09/23/2010

That is a fantastic Article, and yes, all the better for having been written by a man.

Michelle - posted on 09/23/2010

This was in the news today (my local paper) I LOVE that its written by a man... :)
http://www.stuff.co.nz/life-style/wellbe...

Heather - posted on 09/23/2010

I don't feel comfortable nursing in font of small children, unless I talk to their parents first. I have a 4yr old and he thinks it's the only way babies eat. He has even made comments to mothers that were feeding with a bottle... Why are you using that don't you know that's what Boobies are for!... Yes, I felt bad and was embarrassed and explained to him that we all have options and some boobies are broken and don't make milk. That is the only way he understood it. As for other children I like to resect their parents wishes so I will cover up or go in another room.

Tyasia - posted on 09/23/2010

"by Andi- I will nurse anywhere other than a bathroom. I have no problem nursing my child when they are hungry and I feel like if someone doesn't want to see or feels uncomfortable they don't have to look. It is not like I am just whippuing out my whole breast for the world to see, but I don't use a cover either. I have just gotten very good at being discreet to the point where people would sit next to me in the store and carry on a whole conversation even stroking my daughter's hair without realizing that I was feeding her the whole time. And if anyone every made a creapy comment, you can bet that I would make a scene. I don't tolerate juvenile behavior out of adults."
i completely and totally agree with Andi. its exactly how i feel.

Heidi - posted on 09/23/2010

I would BF anywhere, covered up (for my own modesty). However, I had an experience in wal-mart where there was a woman walking, shopping, and BFing her very small newborn. Uncovered, shirt up to the bra line, and completely bare. My thought was there was no way I'd be comfortable with this, but you go girl, if that's OK with you. It seemed, however, that the general public does not share her opinion or confidence! Based on what I wittnessed in Wal-mart, I made a note to self: don't breastfeed in wal-mart! :)

Sharon - posted on 09/23/2010

I was very nervous about BF in public at first. My LO is now 6 months old and we are at the point where we will pretty much BF anywhere. I've fed her in front of the in-laws, at restaurants, etc. I've fed her while walking around the grocery store :) I do use a cover though unless I'm at home or my parents house. The cover is getting a little more difficult though as she gets older she gets more distractable and wants to see what is going on so she tries to pull the cover aside!

I do like to think that by having the confidence to feed her when she needs to be fed and not feeling like I need to hide away that maybe I am doing my small part to help normalize breastfeeding. I used to pump milk to have a bottle on hand so I didn't have to feed her in public but then I felt more ashamed of that like I was letting people think she was getting formula just to make strangers more comfortable so I said to myself WTH?

Cassandra - posted on 09/23/2010

i will nurse anywhere. when my son wants to eat ,my son will eat. i did see on primetime there are like 3 states where mothers are not allowed to nurse in public. we can actually get in trouble!!!!!!!!!!!

Malina - posted on 09/23/2010

i breastfeed my son anywhere, any time. i tried to be discreet about it, but now he pulls off the blanket/cover. i'm sure half of nyc has seen my breasts but i don't care! lol

Tania - posted on 09/23/2010

I'm amazed so many women will nurse anywhere as long as they have something to cover with - and mainly as to not offend anyone else. Breastfeeding is not seen as normal in this country and with so many women unwilling to do it freely, it will never be seen as normal. You can breastfeed uncovered without exposing your whole breast. I use a belly band (from pregnancy) and a regular top and just pull my shirt down over my breast once baby is latched. You can't see anything. I just breastfed multiple times at a huge community yard sale (we were vender #322 and the sale drew a couple thousand people. There were people of all ages and walks of life and many were "exposed" to my normal breastfeeding. I will breastfeed anywhere at anytime because it is my and my child's birth right.

Melanie - posted on 09/23/2010

@Michelle Bailey: It is common. However, people think that "because they have rights" they can do anything. I have STRONG breastfeeding beliefs, which involve feeding my daughter wherever I am when she is hungry. A lot of people in America have wandering eyes and stare like your doing something wrong. It's nature, people, close your eyes if you don't want to see it. (I cover, but I don't like people gawking.)

Monica - posted on 09/23/2010

I use a cover when in public but i usually try to go to a room because my son likes to pull the cover open. I wont nurse in front of the men in my family other than my husband, even with a cover, i always go to a room just so that none of them feel uncomfortable. But i dont think there is a woman in my family who has not seen my breasts. When i'm around just the girls i will nurse without a cover and being that i'm pretty busty it's hard to cover myself with just my tank top. I nurse at Disneyland all the time...with my first baby i was a little nervous, i found a ride that was closed and i went in the line area that no one was at and sat down and nursed while my husband stood in front of me to make sure no one would look...looking back i laugh...now with my second baby i'm so comfortable that i just find an empty bench anywhere and put my cover on and nurse...i've gotten a few people look over at me and realize what i was getting ready to do and they would look away real quick or walk away, i dont mind one bit, it makes the time that i'm waiting for my family to get on and off a ride go by alot faster. I like to people watch while i'm nursing my son at Disneyland, especially at those who are staring at me, it kinda turns the tables alittle.

Soleil - posted on 09/22/2010

I nurse anywhere and anytime my son needs me to. He has every right to eat in public just like I do, and I would never hide the most natural thing in the world...

Gina - posted on 09/22/2010

I would not BF in a public restroom or a bathroom. Ick. I would not eat or drink anything myself in those rooms, so why would I feed a child there? There is nothing sexual about BF'ing a child.

Jennifer - posted on 09/22/2010

I will and have breastfed practically everywhere. I am on my fourth nursling and have accumulated over 5 years of bf time so far, so it has never been practical to not nurse wherever we are, especially as newborns when they nurse every hour or two. That said, once baby is older (over 6months or so) and easily distractable, I will try to find a quieter place if we are out in public such as a nursing room or a quiet corner. The only time I can remember any negativity was a couple of months ago when I was approached by our Church Council President and informed that someone had brought up the issue of my nursing. It had come to her third-hand, so she really didn't have any details on what the person's problem was (Was I exposing myself? Did they just have a problem with nursing in general?), and she herself (as a former nursing mom) was a bit embarrassed to have to mention it to me. I told her no problem, it wasn't her fault, and if the person ever said anything else to please have them confront me directly. Nothing else has been said, and I still continue to nurse in church whenever I need to. I'm sure my screaming baby would much more aggravating than me nursing (in the back pew, with a nursing shirt...).

Michelle - posted on 09/22/2010

I don't understand why its sen as something to hide? Is it not common in America to breastfeed?

Nicole - posted on 09/22/2010

i have and will breastfeed anywhere. I bf'd my dd for a year, and for the first few months I was very self-conscious, making sure that i was covered or in a bf-ing friendly location... however as the months went on i became more and more confident, to the point where i was openly bf-ing in Disneyland and while walking the streets of Mexico while on a family vacation. The only place that i will cover up with our next baby (due in Feb) will be in front of my very old fashioned grandfathers, and then only out of respect for them. In my opinion, breastfeeding is a beautiful gift that a mother gives her child, and if you are bothered by it, look away. congrats to all of you bf-ing mommas, you're giving your child the best gift in the world!

Stevie - posted on 09/22/2010

I nurse anywhere my man is hungry! I wouldn't nurse in front of male friends/family or in public without a cover although if I am somewhere like a quiet park where I can see anyone approaching from a distance I will nurse without cover because really babies don't like blankets over their heads!

Tama - posted on 09/22/2010

Other than the obvious (in a moving car, while driving, while skydiving -- ok... I'd not do that at all! -- but you get the idea...) I'd nurse anywhere. I have a 5.5 yr old that still nurses, but it's mostly at bedtime, so no need for that in public. I've nursed him poolside when he was super tired and at family and friend's houses with no issues. When my kids were younger and needing to eat often, I nursed them anywhere. I don't cover but I did keep discreet in public. I didn't wear nursing tops, but did wear nursing tanks so I could flip the top down and then just pull up my regular shirt. More than anything it kept my baby belly from hanging out. :)

Sally - posted on 09/22/2010

The only time I didn't nurse in public was my brother's wedding. I couldn't get the boob out without taking off half my bridesmaid dress so I nursed my then 2 year old in the lounge side of the women's room. I have in fact nursed while walking down main street. I have never felt uncomfortable in front of anyone. Why would it feel wrong to feed my baby?

Melanie - posted on 09/22/2010

For the most part, I have a blanket on me when I am feeding my daughter. However, I do feed her without one when I have baggier shirts on, because they kind of drape over her so nothing is visible after I have her latched on. I am comfortable with my body and the fact that I am doing this for my daughter's nutrition, so I don't honestly care if people stare. I try to sit in the back of restaurants so as not to be rude to others when they are eating. I don't really think I should have to, but my fiance is uncomfortable with it.

Amanda - posted on 09/22/2010

I'd like to say "Oh, I feed anywhere and everywhere!" That is mostly true and I have *never* used a cover or blanket and don't really give much thought to being "discrete" because I feel breastfeeding is not something to hide away. But, there is one place I have never and will never feel comfortable feeding, my sister-in-law's. I did it once when my son was a few weeks old and she was clearly very very uncomfortable and didn't know where to look, what to do, what to say. She even closed the living room door so the other people in the house wouldn't see.(she never breastfed any of her 4 children at all) I don't think she was being nasty or anything... breastfeeding is just completely foreign to her. So yeah... that's the only place other than a restroom.

Francine - posted on 09/22/2010

I tend to wear double layers, but the only time I don't feed in front of people is when I know for certain it will make them uncomfortable. One of the couples in our Mothers group is very strict Moslem, so, when the husband is around, I don't feed in front of him, because it is offensive to him. Other than that, well, my brother makes comments, but he can learn to deal. :-) I have told him that if he is uncomfortable he can leave, so he usually does :)

Mary - posted on 09/21/2010

I've nursed everywhere. It felt funny to nurse in front of my father in law at first but now (24 months in) i nurse anywhere.
The one place i wouldnt nurse would be a moving vehicle. TOO DANGEROUS!

Brenda - posted on 09/21/2010

I won't nurse in the bathroom in my house -they can wait until I'm done.

I will nurse in public bathrooms when a distractible baby or toddler needs a quiet place and there is no other place to go

I won't nurse in a moving car.

My FIL makes crude comments sometimes -but he does that whether I nurse or not.

I never, ever cover up. My first wouldn't tolerate it AT ALL. He had a severe aversion to any pressure on his face (which interfered with breastfeeding) and anything touching the back of his head would cause him to pull back slightly and not nurse properly

Michelle - posted on 09/21/2010

I am so glad I live in New Zealand... Here I would never consider having to cover up.... I don't walk around flashing people either but when my Baby needs a feed I feed her, it doesn't matter where I am or who I'm with... the only time I've made an effort to go to another room etc is when its been abit noisy or loads of distractions going on. Otherwise its not an issue at all. I would be so put out if I was expected to cover up like you guys all seem to have to in the States! Breastfeeding is the most natural thing in the world and its so sad that people have to justify it.

Katie - posted on 09/21/2010

I nurse anywhere my DD needs to nurse. I do use a cover except for when I'm in the baby room a church. I don't cover up at home though. It took months for my DD to accept being covered up though. I used to use a receiving blanket, but she would pull it off. Then I got a nursing cover which she can pull off. She's still not fond of it, but she can see me and she's getting what she wants. Also I don't feel comfortable nursing her without a cover because she just comes on and off my breast so frequently that I would definately give people a show. She also gets distracted that as soon as she would see someone, then she would turn and look at them. I did cover up when my father was in from out of town. I didn't feel comfortable exposing myself in front of him.

Katie - posted on 09/21/2010

I would avoid places I didn't have a comfortable place to sit. Your situations sound uncomfortable I don't blame you for that. My little brother was uncomfortable with me and my sister nursing so I would warn him so if he wanted to make adjustments he could - my sister on the other hand would intentionally flaunt it but that's their relationship they like tormenting each other. When my son was a toddler I wouldn't BF in grocery stores or restaurants like I did when he was infant mostly because it was easier to wait and he wasn't bfing as often. I still bfed him in public places like the zoo that we were at for hours at a time.

Dora - posted on 09/21/2010

To be honest I breast fed in privacy mostly. Not because I was insecure about it but it was time that I spent with my baby. It was our alone time and that to me was very precious. I can say I never breast fed around my in-laws cause I just thought that was weird. I never felt comfortable around them before I was even nursing and certainly didn't feel comfortable nursing around them.

Micky - posted on 09/21/2010

This is why I love my nursing cover. I don't actually have to expose myself. But I would never BF in front of my grandfather, simply because I know it makes him uncomfortable. I'm a firm believer in the fact that it's something very personally special and the only reason I wouldn't in front of somebody is because I know that it makes THEM uncomfortable. But I wouldn't just whip out my boob and start feeding without a cover unless I was at one of my girl friend's houses. But that's just me.

Alexandria - posted on 09/21/2010

When I first started breastfeeding it was a very frustrating experience for both me and my son. We had problems in the beginning with him not eating because he was a big baby and my colostrum just wasn't enough for him (I don't care what anyone says, doctors, lac consultants, anyone that that is all he needed because it wasn't nearly enough!). And then by the time my milk came in we had to supplement with formula for a few days so he had a hard time latching because my nipple is obviously nothing like a bottle nipple. I'm also a very large breasted woman but I wasn't nervous or afraid at all to feed in front of my FH without a cover. He was very encouraging and supportive and was just as frustrated in the beginning as I was because he knew how important it was to me for our son to be breastfed.
Anyhow! After we got it all figured out I was very nervous/shy to breastfeed in public anywhere even with a cover. Until one day I went to visit my best friend and her family at a restaurant. My LO started getting fussy so they asked if he was hungry and if I needed a cover. They are very pro-breastfeeding. So all it took was a little encouragement from other moms that had "been there, done that" for me to be comfortable doing it. I also looked up the laws for Maryland and Washington DC just to make sure that I could BF anywhere in a public place in case someone wanted to be ignorant. Mind you I always use a cover in public but you know how some people can be. I've fed him at several restaurants, the Museum of American History in DC, the National Zoo, and anywhere else he gets hungry.
As far as people I wouldn't do it around there was only one family in the beginning and that was my FH's Dad and Stepmom. She is so against breastfeeding that I felt like I was doing something wrong. Until I got on places like this and had such helpful and encouraging posts from a lot of the women. Now if she has a problem with it she can leave. I'm not going to give my son a bottle just because she doesn't agree with what is best for my son :]
And for the women who would like a cover but would also like to still see their child while they feed try www.uddercovers.com That's where I got my cover. It has like a wire type neckline that sticks out enough for you to be able to look down at your LO while feeding. I have one and I LOVE LOVE LOVE IT!

Laura - posted on 09/21/2010

lol i breast fed for 2 and a half years and got quite good at discreet public feeding, however i once encountered a woman walking round a clothes shop doing it who walked into the packed lift still with the baby attached, personally that was a bit too public for me!

Nicole - posted on 09/21/2010

Nope- well maybe not in a whorehouse :P naw, who am I kidding even in a brothel (though why I would enter one much less with a baby is beyond me. The three times I've been in a church over the past two years I've nursed openly. The last time I was there, the very pregnant minister saw me and mentioned how she looked forward to nursing her little one right on the pulpit when he arrived. (right in the middle of the sermon ♥) the first time I bfed in there, a nice old man brought me a boppy from the nursery. Phoebe was a week old at that point. I am and over the top nurser- I just pull my breast out of the top of my shirt and get on with it. It is never ever ever inappropriate to bare your breast to nurse. Breastmilk is every baby's birthright- if someone is stupid enough to take offense or feel uncomfortable it is not my problem. They are a detriment to society and need to be re-educated. I don't care if they are older than dirt. Too bad.

Rachael - posted on 09/21/2010

I try to feed anywhere but there are some situations which make me feel uncomfortable. I once went round someone's house and proceeded to feed my son but when they realised what I was doing they told me to go upstairs and do it out of the way because they didn't want to see it. Whenever I see that person now I feel very uncomfortable because I would quite happily yell at them but as they are related to my partner I can't

Margaret - posted on 09/20/2010

I BF wherever I want. People wouldn't think twice if you were walking through a store feeding your child a bottle, so what's the difference? My bottle's are just made out of skin. I've found that cardigans help out a lot because they act as a shawl or drape. I'm also very large up top so it's harder to hide my boob when I'm feeding, but I find it extremely hard to feed my baby with a blanket over him. Not to mention I think he's uncomfortable with it!

Donna - posted on 09/19/2010

I'm a closet feeder i guess b/c the only place i feed is the toilet, in public that is.

Aicha - posted on 09/19/2010

I breastfeed my daughter whenever she is hungry and I really don't care who is watching because I use a cover so all they will see is feet and hear nursing noises

Cassie - posted on 09/19/2010

I breastfeed ANYWHERE!! And am not bothered if my breast is showing or not, after all its there to feed my child, NOTHING else! Its man that has made the breast a sexual object thats why they cannot accept seeing us nursing our childs as they see it inapproprite.. when its NOT!

Nora - posted on 09/18/2010

I will nurse anywhere and in front of anyone. He has to eat and I am not about to leave him hungry and without comfort.

Laura Zoey - posted on 09/18/2010

Just wanted to add, I don't use a 'cover' I just pull my shirt around his mouth. My arm covers side boob and my back shows, but whoopdy doo, it's a back. So I nurse in church every week. That's like the place it should be most accepted, I mean god gave us breasts not bottles. He wants our babies to be healthy, and that's why he made our milk so good for them. He never intended on us using bottles when we have two working boobs! I feel bottles are here for moms whose breasts are not able to nurse, at least in gods intentions.

Dayna - posted on 09/18/2010

if i have something to cover myself with, i would breastfeed anywhere, i did it at apple bees :)

Laura Zoey - posted on 09/18/2010

I would not nurse in front of my bio dad. He was emotionally abusive to me and I can't even stand seeing him. I can't imagine being ok with nursing in front of him. Same with a neighbor I have who keeps making comments that make me think he's attracted to me, he's creepy and a per so I wouldn't give him the image of me breastfeeding to remember.
As for places I wouldn't nurse, I haven't come across any yet. I nurse at church, library, park, in crowds, etc etc. So, I go by the law statement, anywhere I am legally allowed to be, I will breastfeed my child.

Kelly - posted on 09/18/2010

i will nurse anywhere just these 2 men i have spent yrs being creeped out by.. the thought of feeding her in front of them makes me feel sick and very protective of my daughter so i just wont do it... i also have big boobies and have trouble getting her on so she can breath so i have to keep an eye on her the whole time and cant use a cover, i tend to find if i wear a strechy thin top and a vest top under then lean back slightly shes ok... once shes on its rather discrete and my cousins 13 yr old son took a pic of me without realising wat i was doing, its just getting her on lol