reproductive/fertility issues

Brittany - posted on 07/29/2010

On the medical side a hysterectomy seems a bit extreme (not that I know the details of your situation). I believe that you should only use it as an absolute last resort especially since you have this feeling of having more children.

I always say go with your gut in these cases. God speaks to use in different ways. I'm similar to you I get this feeling deep in my heart that there's something I should/shouldn't do. When ever I've followed that voice I've had something wonderful happen to me (including my daughter).

God could very well be telling you to at least wait.

Valerie - posted on 07/28/2010

after talk with many doctors the same situation was recommended to us. we have been through 6 miscarriages, and only have our daughter by adoption. even after the "natural family planning" issues showed to have something medically wrong with me, the idea of not being able to have a child, still hurts. This is something you need to talk to your priest about, as well as your husband. you should also consider that the calling in your heart is for a greater type of motherhood. that of teaching within the church or to adopt/foster those needing a family and God.
there is catholic law/reason that will allow these things to be done for medical reasons as we read and discussed with the clergy.

Donna - posted on 07/27/2010

Praying for you! Praying that your medical conditions are healed, and that you can have that "last" child your heart is longing for!

Erin - posted on 06/14/2010

I had a hysterectomy at the age of 30. I had cervical cancer that had spread (because I was pregnant when it was found, and refused to abort for treatment.) My uterus was also prolapsing (falling out) I had to have a metal spring called a pessary inserted to hold my uterus in for the last few months of the pregnancy. There was really no other option besides a hysterectomy- but I felt at peace with it. If there is no other treatment for whatever condition you have, it is not wrong to have the procedure. It would be wrong if you were having it done to prevent pregnancy- which you obviously are not. I pray that you find your answer and only make the decision that brings you peace!

Alison - posted on 06/12/2010

oh I completely understand, they are giving me it as an option to stop the medical probelms I am having, I didnt want to go into too much detail and bother anyone with too much info inthe female department, but pregnancy is very unsafe for me and I have a few medical conditions that with the medicines that i take would not be safe for the child if i were to concieve. I am in no way trying to use this as a contraceptive, i could never do that, i would rather be in pain than to make it impossible to have children. thank you all for you support and advice.

Angie - posted on 06/12/2010

I agree with Steph G. except discomfort is not a bodily disease. I had a hysterectomy because I was bleeding for so long and so much that I was unable to leave my home for up to 3 weeks at a time. I was severly anemic and was sick all the time. I also had healthy risks during pregnancy and almost died with the birth of my first child. My husband and I were very "conservative" NFP users and never got pregnant when we were unable to. Please speak with a priest and rememeber that the passage Steph mentions is only meant to be used when your life is at risk. Good luck!

Steph - posted on 06/08/2010

Just thought I'd clarify my earlier post. While curing a disease is acceptable, even if it means that unfortunately you won't be able to have more children, using contraception or being sterilised with the willed intention of avoiding having more children is never morally right even if the contraception or sterilisation is a means to a good end like avoiding paralysis or PND or dire financial hardship. "The end never justifies the means" and Church teaching is that contraception is morally evil and therefore never okay as a means. It's precisely in situations like that that the Church teaches that it's okay to use NFP to put off pregnancy.

Alison - posted on 06/06/2010

I jusy feel that I am not done, I have this tugging feeling at my heart that says I am meant to have one more. I would be completely open to adoption one day but I just cant let go of the feeling that I am sopposed to have just one more. Thanks so much you all have helped me see things a little more celarly and feel better now I know I am ok to do this if I have to, :)

Alicia - posted on 06/03/2010

What a tough situation. It seems like your desire for another child is pretty strong and maybe you need to try for one more child, even if it means dealing with the pain for longer. (easy for me to say, right!) Or you need to come to peace with not having more biological children before you can find peace in a decision about hysterectomy, etc. It certainly is acceptable for you to take necessary medical actions to relieve your pain, etc. No different than treating any other aspect of your health. You certainly know that you would be doing it for your health and not as an "easy way out" of birth control issues. So if that is what you decide, know that the Church supports you. But it is a big decision and has to be hard to make--issues of fertility and having children always are b/c they are so emotional. Not to add another level of complexity to your situation, but keep in mind that you could always open your heart and home to more children by adoption, etc. One never knows for sure how God might lead them! Certainly when you get a chance to talk to your priest he can ease your mind that it is okay to have the procedure and hopefully can also be a good source of strength and support as you decide how to proceed.

Cathy - posted on 06/03/2010

I chose to have a sterilisation, because of arthritis in my spine- I have 3 children and with the first my pelvis was damaged, and I am now having some irreversable mobility problems probably because of having the kids. I hope that fits in with the church's rules, but I felt that (for the kids I aready have)having a mother who can walk a little is better than potentially having another sibling but a paralysed mum would be better!

Steph - posted on 05/27/2010

Hi Alison. I'd definately talk to a really orthodox priest about the issue. He should be able to help you interpret the teaching of the Church, especially this from "Humanae Vitae":

"15. On the other hand, the Church does not consider at all illicit the use of those therapeutic means necessary to cure bodily diseases, even if a foreseeable impediment to procreation should result there from—provided such impediment is not directly intended for any motive whatsoever. (19)"

I would say it depends on how serious the effects on your health are.